Magical Girl Gunslinger - Chapter 26: Survivor

I woke with a start, flailing as half-formed memories of Anathema, pain, and gunshots flashed through my mind. A choked scream died in my throat as I sat up, the dryness of my throat turning the sound into a scratchy cough. My eyes watered as I blinked the sleep from them, and it took a moment for my vision to clear.

I was in a… bedroom? Everything in the unlit room was colored in soft white and grays, giving the room a bland, professional feel. A giant widescreen TV hung on the wall across from me while nightstands flanked either side of the bed I was in. The wall to my right was covered in curtains hanging from top to bottom, suggesting the entire thing might have been one large window. Finally, a few pieces of watercolor art depicting gentle landscapes were placed around the room, helping to finish off the minor furnishing along with a few lamps. Two doors led into the room with one of them open, but I couldn’t see what it led to from my position in the bed.

I looked around the room, heart pounding as I tried to process what I was seeing. The one thing that didn’t fit with the decor was an IV pole standing next to me. A bag of blue, glowing liquid hung from it, a thin tube leading down from the bag to a needle in my right arm, just below a rolled up sleeve.

More confusion swept through me as I looked down at myself and saw I was wearing black, long-sleeved pajamas with a purple bunny-head pattern repeating across them. Moreover, something white and fluffy was seated on my lap. It almost looked like a stuffed animal, like a bunny, but-

[You have fifteen pending notifications!]

The blue, semi-transparent box suddenly appearing in my vision made me jump slightly, and the form sitting on my lap stirred, fox tails unfurling as Selene stood up. Her crescent moon pupils stared up at me, floppy ears twitching as her tails began to gently wave back and forth behind her.

[Good morning, Mai,] her gentle, clear voice echoed in my mind. [It is good to see you awake.]

I looked from Selene to the room around me, a dozen questions forming. Of them, one rose above all the rest, burning so fiercely that I felt my heart begin to race. I forced myself to take a deep, steadying breath only to start coughing again as the air aggravated the dryness of my throat.

[The nightstand on the right has some water for you,] Selene directed me, and I looked to see a water bottle placed there.

I reached for it with my left arm, the one not attached to the IV, and-

I stopped, staring down at my left arm with wide eyes.

I had both of my arms.

Emotions started to bubble inside of me, rising in my chest and into my throat. I desperately pushed them down, forcing my shaking hands to grab the water bottle and open it. Some water spilled down my chin as I hurriedly drank, and Selene gave a slow nod of her head.

[Good. Now, I’m sure you have a lot of questions-]

“The shelter,” I interrupted her. “Is the shelter okay? Is Lily…?”

My heart pounded as I stared at Selene, desperation making me shake. My memories felt fuzzy, the entire fight at the shielding station just a blur. I know I pushed the button, but what happened after? Was the shelter saved? Did the plan work?

[The shelter is fine,] Selene quickly assured me. [You successfully restarted the shielding station, restoring power to their emergency shield. Though their battery was severely drained, it was enough for the shelter to last a day on low power mode. That proved to not be necessary, however, as the Usurpation was lifted soon after the shield was restarted, and the shelter was rescued.]

I stared at Selene, the tightness in my chest not disappearing.

The shelter was… rescued?

That didn’t make sense.

No, it did, but it couldn’t be that simple, could it?

“But what about…” I fumbled, squeezing the water bottle tight enough to start crinkling it. “We were surrounded and… The attack on Arcadia and… Um…”

I stuttered, fidgeting as I tried to put into words the desperate restlessness that wouldn’t leave my body.

[Mai,] Selene whispered, her voice soft. [You restarted the shielding station. You saved them, and some Magical Girls saved you. You fought with everything you had, and you won. You did it, Mai. You saved your friend and hundreds of other people. It’s all over now. All of it.]

Slowly, my heartbeat began to slow as her words sank in, the tension melting from my body. As it did, I felt the churning emotions in my chest begin to bubble over, and I looked to the bedroom doors.

“Is anybody out there?” I thought to Selene, not trusting my voice.

[No, it’s just us for now,] Selene responded.

I nodded, taking a deep breath.

And then I broke down sobbing.

The memories of fighting, of my stomach being blended by an Anathema, of trying to keep Brian safe, of learning that my friend was going to die, of my arm being twisted and crushed, of cutting it off, of my desperate fight against the Anathema, of my final words to Selene… all of it seemed to flash through my mind at the same time, and it was just too much.

Every moment had been constant tension like shards of glass were scattered inside my heart, digging deeper with each passing moment. Every breath had been measured, none of them ever quite filling my lungs.

More than that, it was the desperation, the fact that every moment I’d had one clear, indisputable goal in front of me pushing me on like nothing had ever before. But now all of it was just… gone. I woke up, and it was over, like it never even happened. I knew it was stupid, that I should be happy everything had turned out fine, but part of me just felt hollow.

Maybe the worst part was it didn’t feel real. Even as I thought back to the events, everything felt like a dream, like I hadn’t really done any of it. It was worse than an emptiness, it was a feeling of loss. Every reason I’d had for fighting, for pushing myself to keep moving forward was gone, and that left me with…

What did it leave me with?

So I sobbed. It was an ugly, gasping sob that left me breathless and coughing as I let myself cry. Selene had assured me nobody was around, so I let myself give in. Whenever I thought I was almost done, a wracking pang of emptiness would echo through me, and I would start again.

I don’t know how long I cried, but by the end of it, I was exhausted. It felt like all my energy had left with my tears, leaving my body trembling. I wiped at my eyes, sniffling as I looked up at Selene. Her head was bowed, tails lying limp against the bed.

[It’s alright. You’ve been through too much, too soon. I apologize. I don’t know how best to comfort you. If it helps, know that not every day as a Magical Girl is like what you experienced.]

A Magical Girl. That’s right, I’m a Magical Girl now…

Just thinking that felt weird. Maybe it was because I’d never transformed or used magic, but I didn’t particularly feel like a Magical Girl. Sure I had my HUD, but even then, nothing felt different.

I glanced up at my health and mana bars absently and saw that while my mana bar was full, my health was resting at 83%. I suppose That wasn’t too surprising considering my injuries and the fact I still had an IV in my arm, though. But that did make me wonder…

“Selene,” I frowned as I peered at the glowing liquid in the IV bag, “What… What happened? Where am I?”

[Well… perhaps we should start with what the last thing you remember is?]

“I… um. We were fighting in the shielding station, and I was running to the terminal. Then…”

I shivered, a hand going to my chest. I felt for the wound that should have been there but felt nothing other than the softness of my pajamas.

“I got hit… but I kept going to press the button. After that…”

The memory of my conversation with Selene made my throat tighten. I’d been half-delirious from my injuries, I knew that now, but the things I said to Selene made my face heat up. Even worse, I wasn’t sure how to talk about what I was about to do when the Anathema had me surrounded. It had felt like a reasonable thing at the time, but how was I supposed to say that now?

“I… the glass dome broke,” I finally said, skipping over that part and hoping that Selene wouldn’t bring it up, “and some Magical Girls came down. They cleared out the Anathema with magic, and then… put me to sleep?”

The final parts of my memory were blurry, particularly around what the Magical Girls had been saying, but Selene still gave me a nod, her tails swishing excitedly.

[You seem to remember everything, more or less. A group of Magical Girls came to rescue you. By the time they arrived, you were already seriously wounded, forcing them to put you into a magical sleep while they treated you. Once you were stable and the Anathema were fought off, they transferred you here, the Fairlight Hotel. There are various circumstances that made it a more reasonable choice than the Guardian hospital, but I think they would like to discuss those with you directly. They can also explain any other questions you might have.]

“They?” I asked, an edge of apprehension forming in my gut. “What do you mean?”

[The Guardians who rescued you want to have a few words with you,] Selene clarified. [There are quite a few events that transpired while you were unconscious, and there are things that we need to discuss with them. Besides, you still need your Astral Shift unlocked, and they would be capable of doing so.]

I hesitated for a moment. They had gone out of their way to save me, and I knew I owed them a lot. They’d also already seen me without my transformation to hide my identity, so talking to them now wasn’t much of a problem. Still, something bothered me about the idea, something nagging at the back of my mind. No matter how hard I tried to grasp the trailing thought, it eluded me.

I gave up after another handful of seconds, instead asking about something else.

“But… what about everything you said about not trusting other Guardians?”

I felt bad the moment the words left my mouth. After they’d risked their lives to save me, it felt stupid to be doubting them, but it was the only real concern I could vocalize. Even as Selene began to answer me, I knew it wasn’t the real issue that was bugging me.

[These aren’t just any Guardians, Mai. They are a strike team, a group contracted to serve as an elite defense force for Arcadia. More than that, Error Machina was the one who sent them, and he trusts them. While I maintain that other Guardians may be nervous or antagonistic around you, I believe you should trust these ones. I’ve personally reviewed their public records and found nothing to suggest ill intent. Furthermore, they have already signed a Geas to keep all information they’ve learned about you private. I had planned on asking them for an oath when you awoke, but they actually surprised me by taking the initiative with the Geas.]

I let myself process the information for a minute before giving a slow nod. When Selene had first told me to be wary of other Guardians, I hadn’t quite understood her reasoning. Now that I knew what being a Dark Magical Girl meant and the stigma around being one, it made a lot more sense to be cautious.

A Dark Magical Girl…

I shivered, and Selene tilted her head at me inquisitively.

[What’s wrong?]

“It just doesn’t feel real,” I admitted quietly. “None of it. I don’t feel like a Magical Girl, like I was fighting against Anathema. It’s like everything was just a dream.”

[A certain amount of dissociation is only to be expected,] Selene dipped her head. [It is common for new Guardians to struggle with their new status, and after everything you have been through, it is no surprise you feel out of sorts. If you would like, we can hold off on talking to the Guardians while you process recent events. There is no particular rush, and this hotel room is yours to use as you see fit.]

I bit my lip, thinking it over. Some time to just breathe sounded nice. Everything had been one thing after another, and I’d never really gotten time to think about what any of it meant for the long term. I mean, I usually just took one day at a time anyway, but this changed everything…

Or did it? Would being a Magical Girl really make anything different? I mean, I was supposed to keep going out and fighting Anathema, but outside of doing that, had anything changed?

I was still just… me. Wasn’t I?

The problem, I realized, was that I just didn’t know what it meant to be a Magical Girl. Sure, I knew what it meant to fight Anathema, but when Guardians weren’t doing that, what exactly did they do? Most seemed more or less just like celebrities. Doing talk shows, reality TV, merchandise, concerts, and live streaming were just some of the activities I knew they participated in, but what did any of it mean exactly for my daily life?

I just didn’t know, so how was I supposed to process what any of this meant? Combined with the fact that I really wanted to know what happened after I was put to sleep, it seemed like there wasn’t much point in waiting around. As nice as it sounded to just have some time to breathe, it wouldn’t solve anything.

“Um,” I licked my lips. “Could I talk to the Guardians now? I don’t… I need to know what being a Magical Girl means outside of fighting, I think, and I really want to know what’s happening.”

[Completely reasonable,] Selene nodded. [There is a living area with chairs and couches just outside this room we could use for our conversation. Should I go contact them now, or would you like a few minutes to freshen up?]

“I…” I stopped myself, brow furrowing in confusion as I realized I felt great. Other than my throat being a little dry and the slight fogginess in my mind, there was nothing I could really complain about. I didn’t have to use the bathroom, and I wasn’t even hung-

As if triggered by the thought, my stomach suddenly growled as an empty hole of ravenous hunger opening inside me. I bit my teeth down on my lip, tightening my abdominal muscles as I furiously pushed against the feeling. Raising the bottle in my hands, I quickly drank the rest of it, hoping the water would help trick my hunger away like it usually did.

[Ah, of course, you’ve been through no small amount of magical healing. Food will be required to replenish your body’s reserves. I can ask the Guardians to bring some food with them. Do you have any preferences?]

“No, that’s fine,” I hurriedly said. “I can get some later.”

I already owed the group of Guardians more than I could repay, and if that wasn’t bad enough, it was clear from the room I was in that this wasn’t exactly a cheap hotel. I had no idea what the cost was going to be, but-

[Nonsense,] Selene shook her head. [You need to eat, Mai. Magic always comes at a cost, and the cost of receiving magical healing is that your body needs nourishment. While the nutrients you have been receiving from the IV have helped, nothing beats actual food. Besides, you’ve been asleep for a week now, so-]

I missed the rest of what Selene was saying as the bottom of my stomach dropped.

I blinked a few times, her words ringing in my head. My heart stuttered, then began to race as the implications rushed through my mind. I felt my body tensing as I sucked in a ragged, horrified breath.

[Mai?] Selene gasped. [Your vitals-]

“A week?” I whispered numbly. “I’ve been asleep for a whole week?”

[Today would be the seventh day, but don’t worry! Guardian Command and the strike team have assisted me in making an appropriate cover story for your disappearance.]

My heart wouldn’t stop pounding as I looked at Selene. Even though I tried to calm myself down, I could feel something cold slithering its way behind my lungs, looming over my heart with detached dread.

“I, um…” I stuttered. “Has… Has it worked? Has anyone tried calling?”

[We took the initiative to contact your family, of course,] Selene responded. [Right now, they believe you are recovering in a hospital after receiving an injury to your leg saving Brian. We can talk about that more with the strike team, but the story seems to have worked. Your father has called twice a day to ask about your condition and when you can be released. Currently, he believes you are being held to receive magical healing from a Guardian as the wound proved problematic.]

I stared at Selene, the chill inside me sinking deeper into my lungs. The story made sense, and I had walked into the first floor shelter with a wound to my leg, but that wasn’t the problem. I tried to tell myself that everything was going to be fine, that I could deal with this. Really, it couldn’t be that bad. I had good reasons for being gone, didn’t I?

Closing my eyes, I forced myself to take slow, steadying breaths. The cold sense of doom never quite disappeared, and steel wires of tension had wrapped themselves through my body, but that was okay. I was used to the half-breaths and tightness around my heart. It was nothing I didn’t know how to deal with.

[Mai,] Selene started, her voice hesitant. [I know we’ve only been together for a short time, but if there is a problem, you can tell me. It’s your decision, of course, but I’m here to help with anything you might need.]

Something in me recoiled at that, and I realized I was letting myself slip. Quickly, I opened my eyes and forced myself to smile at Selene, making a concentrated effort to relax the muscles on my face. With a small amount of effort, I forced myself to loosen my posture.

“Sorry… I just was a little surprised,” I lied. “Seven days is a long time to be asleep. I was worried it might make people suspicious.”

[Ah… Well, no need to be worried on that front. The cover story we’ve concocted is quite good, if I do say so myself.]

I kept my eyes on Selene’s tails as she talked, watching for any deviations from their normal expressiveness. They never stopped the gentle sway back and forth they usually maintained, and I let out a slow breath of relief as I nodded at Selene.

“Okay… Can you get the Guardians, then?”

[Of course. I’ll get them to bring a variety of foods so you have your choice.]

I opened my mouth to assure Selene I was fine, but she was already hopping away. She reached one of the two doors in two quick bounds, then jumped through it like there was nothing there, her motion only slowing slightly as she phased through.

I swallowed down a sigh, filing away the fact I’d have to find a way to pay back the Guardians for whatever food they bought me. I started extricating myself from the bed, slowly putting weight onto my feet to test out the strength of my muscles. Only when I was sure my legs would hold out did I stand, putting some of my weight on the IV pole just in case.

The hardwood floor was cool against my bare feet, and I shivered as I made my way to the doors. The IV stand had little wheels attached to it, so I rolled it with me, unsure if it was okay for me to remove the line from my arm.

As I reached the door Selene had phased through, I was able to see through the other doorway and see a bathroom. It was huge, all tile and expensive looking marble for the countertops. It had both a shower and a tub big enough to fit multiple people. I felt my throat tighten at the sight as I wondered how expensive this hotel was. I walked into the room, flicking on the lights almost idly as I held my breath and looked into the mirror.

What I saw made me wince. My already messy mop of hair was looking particularly chaotic, and my eyes were red and puffy from crying. Maybe it was my imagination, but my face also looked particularly thin.

Other than that, I didn’t look too bad. The pajamas I had fit me perfectly, and they felt extremely soft, which was…

I frowned, looking down at my pajamas, and that was when the realization of what had been bothering me before hit me like a hammer.

I had been healed by a Magical Girl, and they’d also changed my clothes.

My jaw clenched tightly enough to hurt my teeth as my throat constricted in panic at the implications. I carefully lifted my left sleeve only to find…

Letting out a long breath, I lowered my sleeve. I wasn’t sure what to make of it, so I started checking the rest of my body. It didn’t take me long to realize none of the wounds I’d taken fighting the Anathema had left any sort of scar, not even where I’d cut off my arm, but any mark or blemish I’d had beforehand remained.

But what did that mean? Did magical healing only affect recent wounds, or…

I closed my eyes. It didn’t matter. Chances were, I had to be prepared for questions. Selene hadn’t said anything, maintaining her promise to let me keep my privacy, but I couldn’t expect that from a stranger. They’d probably jump straight into misunderstanding and have plenty of questions.

But I could handle that. I had my explanations ready, and if all else failed, maybe I could leverage my status as a Magical Girl now? Selene had said they’d already signed a Geas to keep any information about me secret, so even if they did try to pry, they shouldn’t be able to bring up anything to anybody else.

Which meant… it was probably fine?

I chewed on my lip, fidgeting in front of the mirror for another moment before I turned on the faucet and started washing my face. My heart was still racing, but I wasn’t sure there was anything else I could do but stay ready. So I washed my face and wet down my hair, hoping it would help make me look a little less rough.

When I was finished, I made sure to brush the fringe of my hair to help hide my right eye. Hopefully that would make them more comfortable talking to me and keep them from staring. Eye contact was nice, but it was painfully obvious to me when someone was flicking their gaze from one of my eyes to the other.

Satisfied I looked at least a little better, I left the bathroom, opened the other door in the bedroom, and stepped through. I stumbled slightly as I took in the new space, jaw dropping.

It was big and very obviously expensive. I was in a sort of living room area with three sofas in dark leather surrounding a glass coffee table with various knicknacks carefully arranged around it. There was another large TV set up over a fireplace, and some small end tables dotted the room with artistic lamps done like sculptures. A small refrigerator was placed next to a desk, and elsewhere there was a countertop with a fancy coffee machine, microwave, and various cups placed on it

There were a few other things to take in, but the more I looked the more my heart began to fall. The tasteful yet nondescript art pieces, the door leading to another bathroom with what looked like a jacuzzi, and the blinds drawn over the large windows making up one side of the room all suggested that this was a very nice hotel, one that cost a lot of money to stay in.

And I’d been here for a whole week?

A stress headache began to form even as I hurried to one of the sofas facing the entryway and sat down. This… How was I supposed to afford this? I already owed the Magical Girls who saved me, and this was only adding to the bill. If that wasn’t bad enough, the glowing blue liquid in my IV suggested they clearly had spent points on me, but-

Wait. I had points now too. I could buy things with those points. Maybe I couldn’t just buy money, but surely I could buy them things to make up for what they’d spent? Or maybe there was a way to trade points between Magical Girls? I had to have some points after the fight and…

I felt my eyes widen. No, I had to have a lot of points. Even Error Machina had said after this was all over, the System should reward me for what I’d done. I’d even gotten the alert that I had fifteen pending notifications, so some of those had to be rewards, right?

I shook my head, feeling a little stupid. Before I could open my status menu, though, Selene reappeared, jumping through the door and hopping over to sit on the table in front of me.

[Alright, the Guardians have been informed that you’ll be ready to talk with them in ten minutes,] Selene said, a hint of giddiness entering her voice.

“Ten minutes?” I asked.

[Well, I figured that before we talked to them, you should look at your notifications!] Selene said, tails swishing excitedly behind her. [Looking at all the rewards you received should help you to feel like a proper Magical Girl! Also, I thought that by reviewing them now, you would be able to ask the Guardians coming in any questions that may arise. Their advice on what to spend your points on may prove invaluable.]

I hesitated a moment before nodding. I hated to owe them more after everything they’d done for me, but Selene was right. I had literally no idea what I was doing or what my future held. Any help they might give me really would be priceless.

[Excellent!] Selene cheered. [Let’s get started then.]