[Main HP Comprehensive British-American] Lolita - Chapter 34

“I’m going back,” Dolores said.

“Don’t try to run away,” Voldemort warned, glancing at her. “You know I can always find you.”

“I didn’t want to run away,” she straightened, “but I didn’t want to reunite with you either.”

The man laughed: “Then see how long you can hold on.”

“What’s the meaning?”

“Think about why you left in the first place. I know you, you are too good at making trade-offs, and when you were fifteen years old, you negotiated a deal with yourself, so of course it wasn’t impossible for me to forgive me for taking advantage of you three years ago. .You’ve escaped all the way to America just because—”

The man’s cold fingertips ran across her lips, “I am no longer the only thing you want. At the same time, you are afraid because you find that you don’t understand what you really want, and you can’t estimate what you want for this unknown. What is the price of desire. So, let me ask you, have you figured it out?”

Dolores was silent for a while, then replied in an obscure tone: “…No.”

“You’ve become a lot weaker, Victoria, and that’s not a good sign.”

“Normal people define that as kindness, sir,” she shot back.

“Abide by social morals is the self-preservation of the weak, because they know they can’t afford to break the rules of the game. Do you know why Joshua died?”

“I shouldn’t have been so mean to Lucy, I-”

Voldemort interrupted her, “No, you should have killed her in the first place.”

“I can’t agree with you,” she shook her head. “Vengeance is like an endless loop, and someone has to learn to tolerate it to stop it.”

“Wouldn’t killing her break this causal cycle?”

“But you can’t kill everyone who has a grudge against you.”

“Strength can do it,” he said in a emphatically slow tone, “I can do it.”

Their conversation broke up again, just like three years ago, no one could convince anyone, no one would admit defeat.

Dolores found Severus Snape at the observatory at night.

“Hi.” She sat down next to the boy and said hello.

The black-haired boy glanced at her and said lazily, “Are you helping Potter to get mad at me?”

“Of course not,” she smirked. “I heard you agreed to keep Lupin a secret?”

“Professor Voldemort told you?” he snorted coldly. “I knew you were very close. What did you come to me for?”

“Just wanted to talk to you, we haven’t sat down and chatted for a long time.”

Snape didn’t speak immediately, and he probably recalled the picnic by the Black Lake, the bickering conversations, and the desserts that Lily and Angela made themselves, which were always fluffy and warm.

“I’m sorry,” he said, “I shouldn’t have said that to you.”

Dolores shook his head, “You’re right. I do always interfere with others with a sense of superiority. At the same time, I’m also cowardly and afraid of facing my true self.”

The boy didn’t answer immediately. He seemed to be very unfamiliar with situations like this. After a while, Dolores waited for a dry reassurance: “No one is perfect.”

Then he added: “At least you saved me and managed to keep my mouth shut.”

“It was James Potter who saved you,” she pointed out cautiously. “It wasn’t me who convinced you, it was Voldemort. Did he promise you anything?”

“He said I was very smart,” the fourteen-year-old boy couldn’t help but be proud, “asked me if I would like to work for him after graduation.”

“Hey,” she said unhappily, “that’s about as much as I can give you! Why would you say no to me and say yes to him?”

“It’s different, Professor Voldemort really sees my talent, and your proposal is just a friend’s kindness.” Snape looked at her contemptuously, “Wait until you don’t have to ask me to help you with your potions homework. Bar!”

“But you haven’t helped me with my potions homework for a long time…” Dolores muttered, then his eyes lit up, “Is this a reconciliation? Will you still help me with my homework in the future? Severus Severus?”

“Gryffindor!” Snape sighed in a low voice, nodding amidst the head-scratching ‘Severus’.

Dolores lay back happily, hands behind his head, “Why do you know what you want, Severus?”

“Because I don’t have anything.” The boy also lay down following her example, the wind temperature in early summer was just right, and gently brushed their wide robes, “You have too much, it will disturb your thinking. ”

“But I have nothing,” she whispered.

“You’re rich, you have a famous uncle, and you have some friends. What makes you unsatisfied?”

“I…” She was at a loss for words, “I used to want love, the love from a person. Later, I found that this can only satisfy a little girl, and only love is not enough. It is far from enough.”

“Did your dean give you employment counseling?” Snape interrupted her in-depth self-analysis impatiently.

“Huh?” Dolores opened his mouth and recalled for a while, “I did, I told Professor McGonagall that I would go back to the United States to go to Muggle University.”

“You see, that’s the problem, your choices are all too easy, and your family allows you to have at least a hundred options,” Snape said, “but is the choice what you want? Ed? Wen’s ideal is to be a lawyer, very brave, and the pressure to give up his heir status is unimaginable. And I will go farther than anyone else in potions and black magic. After Lily graduates, I want to apply for an Auror, even Angela. She knew exactly what she wanted to do, even though her ideal position was Mrs. Plimell.”

“Dolores, you can easily get a lot of things that most people can’t get in their lives, but what is it that you need to work hard to get? Why not try these? I believe they will be better than Going to Muggle University is fun.”

“…But what can I do?”

“What defines you, what makes you, what makes you, that’s where you should go.”

Dolores laughed. “Severus, you’re amazing. You’ll get everything you want. As for me, who doesn’t ask for progress,” she stretched, “I want to see the moon first.”

The boy raised his head slightly and looked at the moon. He had been on his way without stopping, never looking up at the silver, enchanting planet. At this moment, no one would scold him, there was no desire. Wang was pushing him forward, and he stared at the moon like a child, marveling at its beauty simply and silently.

“One day,” said Dolores suddenly, “one day, I will face my true self, and I will say my true name.”

“We’ll see.” He replied with a smile.

“Dolores?” Edwin frowned. “What’s the matter with you?”

“Ah—” She took her gaze away from Edwin, “it’s nothing.”

Then he quickly asked in a low voice, “I heard that you want to be a lawyer?”

“Yes,” he replied, “reconciled with Severus?”

Dolores nodded and asked reluctantly, “Why?”

Edwin stopped the quill that was constantly writing on his hand, thought about it seriously, and then smiled shyly, “Probably because of the stupid and arrogant reason that I want to practice justice in my own way. .”

The author has something to say: this chapter may be boring to many people, but I like it very much.

The professor and Lauder have similar ideas. They know what they want and have enough ability to execute, so they are rarely confused. Victoria’s idea is more universal, set out as a kind and normal person so deeply bound by the deaths of Lucy and Joshua. Therefore, in addition to the sweet romance scene, she will slowly find herself and become the little girl who dared to think and act again.