Maybe a Fake Gintama - Chapter 113

– [Drinking White Wine] and [White Wine Drinker] Are Not the Same Thing at All!“Just this once!” Gintoki’sface was grim, and it seemed that his heart was bleeding, “Please pour me another bucket of water!”

“What do you want a bucket of water for?” Kawaki, who was holding a bottle and drinking in it, put down the empty bottle and asked doubtfully.
“Have you finished it?” Gintoki was in a bad mood. He grabbed Kawaki by the collar and shouted, “This is the wine I bought with my money! You actually drank it all! I didn’t even take a sip!”
“Hey? I remember that you don’t like Chinese white wine, don’t you?” Kawaki pretended to be confused.
“It doesn’t matter whether I like it or not! It’s just because I bought it with my money! My money!”
“Your money!” Kawaki was shocked. Then, he looked at Gintoki with a grateful expression, “I didn’t expect you to treat me to such an expensive wine…”
“Do you only have seven seconds of memory?! Are you a fish?! Don’t play dumb!”
…
“Sigh, I’m so unlucky… I didn’t even drink a single glass of wine, and my wallet is already empty…” Gintoki lowered his head in disappointment.
“What does it matter? Those are just worldly possessions.” Otae comforted him.
“Worldly possessions?” Gintoki raised his head and sent her a chuckle, “That is a worldly possession to you, but to Gin-san, it is all Gin-san’s property! Last time, I was already extorted by Kawaki. I didn’t expect to be extorted by him in a few days. I am really a hopeless big fool!”
“I didn’t expect you to be so accurate about yourself. Congratulations, Gintoki.” Kawaki was the first to clap.
“Don’t let me see your face! I’m super angry right now!” Gintoki roared. Then, he looked at Otae with disdain and teased, “After spending so much money, is there any service? Can I touch your butt or something?”
Otae smiled and gave Gintoki an elbow strike just as he finished speaking. This time, Gintoki did not dare to speak carelessly. He picked up the napkin on the table and wiped the blood from his nose.
“Are you kidding me? Rather than touching your flat ass, I might as well pinch a dough…” Gintoki curled his lips and muttered.

“Is that so?” Looking at Gintoki, who was bleeding non-stop, Otae looked at him with disdain, “t’s really annoying to see people start to have nosebleeds just by looking at me.”
“This person is not ordinary. She forgot about what happened two or three seconds ago…” Gintoki silently complained, “She is exactly the same as that certain someone with seven seconds of memory…”
“What an interesting guest. Anyway, let’s drink something first.” Otae smiled and skipped the topic, “We have Dom-Peri, Dom-Peri, Dom-Peri…”
(PS: Dom-Peri is Japanese for Dom Perignon, a very expensive champagne. A bottle of it has an average price of 200 USD while older bottles grow in price exponentially.)
“Shochu and water,” Gintoki replied decisively, “This is enough for now.”
“I understand,” Nodding her head, Otae shouted to the waiter, “Dom-Peri, please!”.
“Can anyone help me find an interpreter?” Gintoki decisively raised his hand to ask for help.
“Dom-Peri? That brings back memories!” Hasegawa sighed, “I used to drink a lot when I was working in Bakufu, but now I can’t afford to touch it. It’s better to give me some cheap ones, such as beer or something like that…”
As he spoke, Hasegawa picked up the menu beside him and flipped to the first page. The first page was the Chinese white wine that Kawaki had just opened, “Is the first page for Chinese white wine?”
“No! Forget about the expensive and high alcohol content!” Gintoki shook his head decisively, ignoring the dissatisfaction that Kawaki expressed.
“That’s true. Let’s look at the rest.” As he spoke, Hasegawa flipped to the second page, “Dom-Peri, Dom-Peri mixed with Dom-Peri, not beer but Dom-Peri, nothing but Dom-Peri, more Dom-Peri, say Dom-Peri. What was Dom-Peri? I’m all mixed up Dom-Peri…”
“It’s all Dom-Peri!” Gintoki and Hasegawa were instantly in a bad mood.
“Black shop! This is definitely a black shop!” Gintoki whispered into Hasegawa’s ear.
“How can you say that? How could Otae…” Hasegawa replied.
“But, what is Dom-Peri mixed with Dom-Peri? How can I dilute it like this? I can’t dilute my bad mood!” Gintoki retorted.

“Gin-san,” Otae sat on the seat with a shy expression and said bashfully, “I haven’t drunk Dom-Peri in a long time. I really want to drink~”
“Me too~” Kawaki followed suit and said, “I also want to drink~”
“Dom-Peri, your head! What do you mean “I haven’t drunk it for a long time?” you haven’t had one at all!” Gintoki roared and then looked at Kawaki, “Why are you drinking that kind of thing?! Do you want to tear down this shop?!”
“I didn’t expect you to care so much about me, Gintoki,” Kawaki covered his face, sobbed twice, and slightly raised his head, “Then give me two bottles of Five Grain Liquor!”
“There is no need for that! By the way, can you really drink the difference in liquor price?!” Gintoki was mad, and then whispered in Kawaki’s ear, “Didn’t you notice that this is a black shop? How can it be 50,000 yen per bottle? Let’s retreat first. I remember that you used to like a Chinese white wine called Erguotou, right? I can treat you to that!”
“Who are you looking down on? Gintoki!” Kawaki snorted and continued arrogantly, “I’m a man who has tasted Chinese white wine all over the world! I can tell whether it’s a strong-flavored or a light-flavored one!”
(PS: A certain author has a leader. The leader loves to drink, and he only needs to smell to know the brand of the wine. Unlike a certain author, the white wine for him only has the smell of alcohol. The key is that when the leader needs to drink, he will drag a certain author along…)

“It’s no use talking about this here!” Gintoki has driven mad again.
Oryou, who had been sitting at the side since the beginning, also began to attack Hasegawa crazily.
(TL note: Oryou is Shimura Tae’s colleague at Snack Smile.)
“Hasegawa-san, I think your shades, and your shades, and your shades, would go well with Dom-Peri,” Oryou said with a smile.
“Peri?” Hasegawa felt a little uncomfortable, “That’s odd! You’re odd! Are my shades the only thing you can compliment?!”
After that, looking at Otae and Oryou, who were using brainwashing attacks on Gintoki and Hasegawa, Kawaki sighed softly and walked to the nearby seats. If Jiang Cheng has any skills that can get a perfect score, then only [Drinking White Wine] and [White Wine Drinker]. Of course, the skill [White Drinking] was also tailored and taught to Kawaki by Gintoki according to Kawaki’s characteristics.
“Ladies, is there anyone here?” Kawaki showed a refreshing smile and said to the two pretty young ladies who were drinking with the guests.

“No!” The two young ladies answered decisively and sent the previous guest flying.
“Then can I sit here?” Kawaki asked again with the same refreshing smile on his face.
“Of course!” The two young ladies pulled Kawaki and sit on the left and right.
In fact, the trick that Gintoki gave Kawaki was very simple. First, the expression had to be refreshed, and the eyes had to be sincere. Then, he could coax these women to take out money to buy wine for him to drink.
…
“Hey, don’t you notice that one person is missing?” Gintoki reminded.
“Eh… where did Kawaki-san go?” Only then did Otae notice that Kawaki had already disappeared.
“Otae, look over there…” Oryou pointed in a certain direction.
“That is…” As she spoke, Otae looked over and saw that Kawaki was drinking while accompanying the two young ladies beside him, “That guy, is he treating this place as another store? For example, the cowherd store?”
…
“Hey, why did you drag me back? It wasn’t easy for me to get a drink.” Kawaki said with a face full of reluctance while pouting his lips.
“You can’t be considered a real man in the wine house to coax a woman to buy wine for yourself. It is just a scum.” Otae narrowed her eyes and said.
Seeing the dangerous smile on Otae’s face, Kawaki swallowed his saliva and quickly explained, “That was taught to me by Gintoki! In the beginning, I was very resistant to it!”
“Is that so?” Otae maintained her smile and turned her head to Gintoki.
“There’s no other way. It’s because we were poor at that time,” Gintoki said casually, not noticing the inexplicable flames burning on Otae’s body at all, “Is there anything wrong with drinking free wine in his condition?”

“I didn’t expect there to be a real scum here~,” Otae said as she raised her fist…
“Ah—!” Gintoki screamed.
Just as Gintoki finished screaming, a cheer louder than Gintoki’s scream rang out.
“Wow -! It’s Matsudaira-sama!” A group of wine girls surrounded Matsudaira at the door and cheered.
“PAPA~ You really came~ I’m so happy~” Ane ran all the way to Matsudaira and then held his arm, “I’m sorry~ I disturbed your work~”
“That kind of meeting doesn’t matter. Anyway, Edo won’t be destroyed or anything,” Matsudaira blew out a smoke ring and then said, “If I don’t come here, I will be destroyed.”
“Ah! I’m so happy!” Ane said coquettishly.
Seeing this scene, Kawaki and Gintoki were both defeated by this Miko.
“That is Matsudaira-sama!” Oryou said, “That man is famous for the outrageously extravagant way he parties!”
“Is that so…” Kawaki muttered, “But it feels a little familiar… It seems like I’ve seen him somewhere before…”
“Eh? Is that an acquaintance of Kawaki-san?” Otae covered her mouth and was a little surprised.
“Oh! I remember now!” Only then did Kawaki remember what happened at the amusement park last time, “That was the uncle who played the shooting game with me at that time!”
“Shooting game?” Gintoki narrowed his eyes and looked at Kawaki. He fell into a trance. After all, there were many types of shooting games, especially with the man-only gun that he brought, “You guys…”
“Don’t worry, it’s just a shooting game. It’s definitely not the kind of perverted game you think it is or a killer game.” Kawaki decisively interrupted Gintoki’s fantasy, “I’m really happy at that time~ Let me help kill my daughter’s boyfriend or something~”
“Hey, how did it become a criminal case again! Didn’t you say it was a game just now?! What the hell did you do for someone else!” Gintoki scolded, “And, isn’t that uncle a Shinsengumi member? Why would he ask you to do such a thing?!”