Maybe a Fake Gintama - Chapter 97

“That’s not right! Isn’t Jugo and Juroku behind Junana?! Why is it Juhachi!” Toshiro complained.

(TL note: The names mean 15,16,17, and 18 respectively)

“Because Junana doesn’t sound good, so I changed it.” Kawaki explained again, “Listen, Juhachi is crying again.”

The child cried incessantly, even Toshiro was a little suspicious, “Could this be… Could this be the real truth of the mayonnaise? I always thought that mayonnaise was made by the mayonnaise spirit in the Kingdom of Mayonnaise…”

Kawaki took out his phone and took two pictures of Toshiro. Then, Kawaki and Sogo could no longer hold themselves back. They covered their stomachs and began to laugh loudly.

“What is that? That skeptical expression? It made me laugh… hahahahaha… this person really has a hole in his head! Hahahaha…”

“Boss, am I right? Hijikata-san is just a fool. Hahahaha…” As he spoke, Sogo took out a phone and put something on Toshiro, “Don’t worry, Hijikata-san, Jugo, Juroku, or even Juhachi are still alive and well in your [Beep—]!”

Toshiro was silent for a long time with a black face. Then, he suddenly stood up and pulled out the sword he had placed beside him, “Both of you, go to hell!”

“Ah, this is bad. Let’s run first, boss.” As he spoke, Sogo broke into a run.

“Wait for me, Sogo-kun~” Kawaki instantly caught up.

“Don’t worry, when I just took the phone, I had already put two time bombs on Hijikata-san,” Sogo said as he ran.

“Really?” Kawaki asked doubtfully. He subconsciously turned his head, but two loud explosions sounded at this moment.

“By the way, boss, remember to send me the photos you took just now. I still have to go on a mission.” As he spoke, Sogo ran to the other side.

“Don’t worry! This is a precious mobile phone wallpaper.” After saying that, Kawaki waved to Sogo and walked to the other side.

In the same place, Toshiro, who the explosion had knocked out, was directly ignored by the two people…

…

“Hey, isn’t this Dairoku(Big Six)?” Kawaki walked on the road and greeted Ikumatsu’s little uncle.

“Who are you calling Dairoku(Big Six)?”

“Hey? Isn’t your brother called Daigo(Big Five)? Aren’t you Dairoku(Big Six)?” Kawaki asked doubtfully.

(TL note: The name Daigo(大吾)(大 / Big, 吾/ I or We) is Ikumatsu’s husband, while the Daigo(大五)(大 / Big, 五 / Five) here has the same pronunciation.)

“My brother’s name is not that 五(Five)!”

“Could it be… your name is Koroku(Small Six)? Not Dairoku(Big Six)?” Kawaki said in shock, “You should have said that earlier, Mr. Koroku(Small Six).”

“Don’t give people such strange names!” Koroku(Small Six) roared.

“Big brother! It’s Shinsengumi!” The lackey beside him reminded. At this time, Koroku(Small Six) suddenly found two members of Shinsengumi walking by.

Thus, the three of them quickly turned their heads around.

“This hateful Amanto!” Koroku(Small Six) spat, “And that Katsura is super annoying.”

“Yo, it’s been hard on you!” Kawaki looked at the two Shinsengumi members on the road and greeted them. He walked forward, took out two coupons, and handed them over, “Come and play when you are free~.”

A Shinsengumi member scratched his head and said with a smile, “I didn’t expect Boss to go to the ground to pull up business.”

“There is no way. After all, the traffic is getting less and less now~” Kawaki sighed with emotion, “Come and play if you are free. I will give you a discount~.”

“Although we also want to relax occasionally, vice captain, he…” As he spoke, the Shinsengumi member revealed a look of difficulty.

“Ah, I almost forgot. Your vice captain doesn’t seem to be doing too well right now…” Kawaki suddenly seemed to have thought of something.

“What happened to the vice captain?” The two Shinsengumi members quickly asked.

“It seems that he was playing a bomb game with Sogo-kun and accidentally exploded it in anger.” Kawaki pointed a direction for the two Shinsengumi members.

“He seems to be still unconscious at the intersection over there…”

“Vice Captain!” The two Shinsengumi members shouted as they rushed over.

…

“Big brother, it seems that the kid sent the Shinsengumi away!” The lackey at the side said to Koroku(Small Six).

When Koroku(Small Six) turned around, the two Shinsengumi members and Kawaki had already disappeared.

“Humph! What Shinsengumi! Their attitude of bowing to Amanto makes me want to vomit!” Koroku(Small Six) spat disdainfully and scolded.

“Now is not the time to talk about this, right? What should we do with Ikumatsu?” Another lackey asked.

“I have thought of a way…” Koroku(Small Six) said with an evil smile.

…

“Welcome~” Ikumatsu greeted, “It’s you again? Aren’t you afraid that the one from your family will come after you again?”

“What do you mean? The one from my family? Who is that?” Kawaki sat down and put the newly bought game aside. Then, he said with some doubt, “I was just a little hungry on the way out to buy the game.”

“Kawaki, Ikumatsu is referring to Miss Tsukuyo,” Katsura reminded him.

“Huh? Are you guys misunderstanding something? Tsukki and I don’t have a [Beep—] relationship like yours.” Kawaki waved his hand and said casually.

“Why do you have to add [Beep—]’s sound? We don’t have anything to do with each other!” Ikumatsu retorted. Just as she said this, she felt that something was wrong, “Our relationship is just between a Samurai, who is avoiding the rain, and the owner of a shop. But now it is just the relationship between the store owner and the store assistant.”

“That’s it, a Samurai seeking shelter from the rain and a single female owner. This kind of theme is not good now. I don’t want to click on it at all. Although the store assistants and the store owner are also common topics now, compared to the previous one, the latter one is indeed better.” Kawaki analyzed.

“Do you only know how to think in that direction?!” Ikumatsu blushed and scolded, “Can you think of something normal? Don’t you feel ashamed to say this in front of a lady?!”

“Although I don’t know what you’re thinking, I’m only talking about TV dramas!” Kawaki retorted.

“Do you think I believe you?!” Ikumatsu cursed, but after scolding, she looked at Kawaki’s clear eyes and could only give up, “What do you want to eat?”

“Thirty bowls of katsudon, and ten more plates of dumplings. After all, I just bought the game, and I don’t have much money left.” Kawaki looked at the menu and said slowly after thinking for a moment.

“This is not a small amount at all!”

“No, this is the least. This guy used to make countless buffet restaurants close!” Katsura sighed from the side. Katsura was right. During Joui War’s time, Kawaki had an astonishing appetite. It could be said that wherever the army fought, a restaurant would go bankrupt and close.

“…” After a moment of silence, Ikumatsu slowly said, “Fortunately, I didn’t open a buffet restaurant…”

…

“Speaking of which, you are really obsessed with this kind of thing?” Ikumatsu picked up the game that Kawaki had put aside and looked at it in her hand. Then she looked at Kawaki who was wolfing down the food.

“How can you say [this kind of thing]?” After eating the last dumpling, Kawaki snorted and continued, “So, women will never understand the attraction of this kind of thing to men!”

“Only you are attracted by this kind of thing!” As she spoke, Ikumatsu sighed, “If you love this kind of thing too much, you will become a good-for-nothing man. Even if you have good skin, women will not like it if you have this kind of thing inside.”

“That kind of thing doesn’t matter!” Kawaki continues, “Women are not as important as games! Don’t you think so, Zura?”

“Don’t categorize me with you!” Katsura retorted, “Also, it’s not Zura, it’s Katsura!”

“Why are you like this?!” Kawaki said with some disbelief, “Did the days when we played LAN CS together were gone forever?” After saying that, he even hypocritically wiped his tears.

“I don’t remember that kind of thing at all!” Katsura said loudly, “I’m from Nintendo!”

“You’re about the same!” Ikumatsu complained loudly.

“I really want to see Brother Mario again!” Katsura sighed.

Looking at Kawaki and Katsura who were arguing over the game issue, Ikumatsu smiled helplessly.

…

“Speaking of which, when I came here, I met Koroku(Small Six).” Kawaki said casually.

“Koroku(Small Six)? Who is that?” Ikumatsu asked doubtfully.

“Isn’t he your brother-in-law?” Kawaki said matter-of-factly.

“He doesn’t have that name!” Ikumatsu was a little speechless, “Forget it, it doesn’t matter.”

“It seems that he still has a bad heart for his single sister-in-law. He even said that he had some plans, but I was in a hurry to buy a game, so I didn’t listen.” Kawaki said casually.

“I see…” Ikumatsu said calmly.

“If that’s the case, then I’ll be leaving first~” As he spoke, Kawaki stood up and took out his money to pass to Ikumatsu.

“Your welcome to visit again~”

…

“Are you friends?” Ikumatsu asked.

“Ah, I didn’t expect to be discovered by Miss Ikumatsu! Miss Ikumatsu’s observation skills are really amazing!” Katsura said in surprise, and then said confidently, “We are great friends! We fought together for the sake of Japan’s… The dawn of ramen struggles!”

“I didn’t see that…” Ikumatsu teased with a smile, “But I can see that guy is also silently paying attention to you.”

“Huh?” Katsura, who was eating soba noodles, raised his head and let out a puzzled voice.

“It’s nothing. You can continue eating.”

In fact, Ikumatsu had noticed since Kawaki entered the shop that Kawaki had unconsciously glanced at Katsura’s leg, or rather, the place where he had been injured.

…

The next day.

“Aren’t you going to that shop to see your friend today?” Tsukuyo leaned against the window of Kawaki’s room and asked softly.

“What are you talking about?” Kawaki, who was playing the game, said without turning his head.

“Tsk, his personality is already bad to the extreme, yet he still isn’t honest,” Tsukuyo complained.

Kawaki didn’t reply and continued to stare at the computer screen…

A few days later, when Kawaki went to Ikumatsu’s shop again, he found that Katsura had disappeared, and instead there was soba on the menu…