My Once Handsome Husband - Chapter 279

Dying.

Delaney’s mind went blank and she felt suddenly dizzy.  Her mouth was dry and she felt weak.  She wavered on her feet and Miles rushed forward, reaching for her arm.  She jerked it back from him.

“Don’t touch me,” she spoke in a strange tone not caring that she could see how sorry he was written all over his face.

With her lips slightly parted and breaths coming in shallow gasps she turned and her eyes landed back on her husband.  He met her gaze for a moment but quickly looked away, reaching up to rub the back of his neck.  Anger, hurt, and disbelief were swirling through her and she couldn’t land on just one.

“You lied to me,” she said with a shaky voice, “You’ve been lying to me for our entire marriage.”

He swallowed hard but didn’t try to deny it.  The muscles in his jaw twitched and he stared hard at the bed beside him.

“All those times,” she whispered, “All those times I brought up your scars or the poison or you not feeling well… You could have told me.  You could have told me so many times…”

“I didn’t want you to worry…”

“Vincent I am your wife!” she spoke louder now as her anger at him rose, “I have the right to know if something is wrong with you and I have the right to worry about you!  I love you.”

“If I had told you… that’s all our marriage… would have been about,” he said coldly, meeting her eyes now, “You would have been… obsessed with trying to save me… just like you were obsessed… with trying to have a baby.”

Delaney stepped back, feeling as if he had sunk a dagger into her gut.

“I-I was obsessed with having a baby because of you,” she whispered, “You would only stay married to me if I did and I wanted to be with you for the rest of my life.  If you had told me you were sick of course I would have wanted to try to find a way to save you for that same reason!”

Looking away from her again, when he spoke now his voice was cold and quiet.

“It would have been… a waste of our time together… to try to find a cure…  Just like… It was a waste of our time… to try to have a baby.”

Delaney inhaled sharply as her tears burned in her eyes.

“You’re wrong,” she whispered, shaking her head, “You’re being cruel and you’re wrong.”

“I’m not wrong Delaney…”

“You are!” she cried angrily, “You are wrong Vincent!  We could have tried to find a cure and we might have succeeded because… because we succeeded at having a baby.”

His green eyes snapped up to her, serious and in disbelief.

“W-What did you say?”

Delaney bit her lip as she felt her heart breaking.  “We’re having a baby,” she said, “No one told me to come here.  I came… I came to tell you that I’m pregnant.  We’re going to have a baby.”

So many emotions flashed over Vincent’s face she couldn’t tell what he was thinking.

“D-Delaney,” he reached out to her.

“It doesn’t matter now,” she shook her head, “You’re dying and you didn’t give us a chance to try to save you.  You never gave us a chance to have a future.  You didn’t want me to be with you while you died Vincent then fine.  I’m leaving.”

She turned, pulling her arms away when Miles or Violet tried to reach for her.  Both were talking quickly but she didn’t care what they had to say.  She was so angry with them.  She was angry with all of them.  She was angry with her husband.

“Delaney wait!” he yelled louder than he had managed all night, his voice rough.

She paused and against her better judgment, turned slowly to look over her shoulder at him.  What she saw broke her heart.

“Please wait,” he begged desperately with tears on his scarred cheeks, “Please!  I don’t blame you… for wanting to leave… and I won’t stop you but please… Please wait and go in the morning…  It’s late and there are wolves and I can’t… I can’t protect you anymore.”

He looked so broken for a moment she wanted nothing more than to run to him and kiss him and tell him she would never leave him.  Her anger was still boiling in her chest though and he had been lying to her for so long she couldn’t accept it.

“Fine,” was all she said before she turned and left, closing the door hard behind her.

Out in the hall, she found Ms. Bird and a few other servants waiting.  The old maid looked stricken when she took in the sight of her mistress but it was clear she had already learned from the other servants the hard truth Delaney had just learned.

“Oh my Lady,” she said quietly, coming forward, “Come with me.”

She reached out and gently touched Delaney’s arm, guiding her to the door of her old bedroom.  Inside she saw the maid had had her trunk brought in and left in this room.  Ms. Bird was quick to close the door behind them and as soon as she did, Delaney, at last, fell apart.

–

Laying on the bed, Delaney cried, pressing one hand to her gently rounded belly.  He was dying.  The man she loved, the father of her child, was dying.  He was dying and he hadn’t told her even though he had known since before they were married.  Now she would have their baby alone.  She would raise it alone without their father by her side.

Ms. Bird locked the door to the room so no one would disturb her mistress but sat quietly in the corner waiting in case the woman needed her for anything at all.

She had been told by the other servants the whole story of all the people who had known the Duke was dying and how they’d kept it a secret from the Duchess.  Her own anger and hatred for them sat in the pit of her stomach like a weight.  How could they betray Delaney in such a way?

The only one she did understand at least a little was the duke himself.

A knock came at the door causing the maid to jump.

“Please make them go away,” Delaney whispered through her tears.

“Of course my Lady,” Ms. Bird assured her, “I promise I won’t let anyone in here.”

She opened the door just a crack and looked out.  When she saw who it was she sighed and stepped out into the hall, closing the door behind her.

“What do you want Harris?”

The red-headed man looked down where he was holding a tray with tea and different foods.

“Vince… Lord Adair wanted me to make sure she wasn’t hungry and didn’t need anything.”

He nodded down the hall.  When Ms. Bird looked, she saw other servants were waiting with arms full of things the Duke must have thought his wife might need.

“She’s fine,” the maid said bluntly, turning to leave.  It might not have been true but she was not going to take anything from one of the people that had kept such an important secret from her mistress.

“I’m sorry!” Harris said quickly, causing her to pause and turn back to him, “I’m sorry I didn’t tell you.  I know you’re angry with me.  He made me swear I wouldn’t but I still feel terrible that I didn’t tell.  I… I should have.”

The old maid studied him closely for a moment, trying to judge if he was telling the truth or not.  At last, she sighed.

“Yes you should have,” Ms. Bird frowned, crossing her arms over her chest, “But… I suppose if there’s one thing I understand, it’s loyalty to the person you care for.”

“R-Really?” Harris looked hopeful.

“Of course,” Ms. Bird nodded, “I didn’t tell anyone that Lady Adair is pregnant even though I really wanted to… So I suppose I forgive you.”

Harris smiled in relief.  He had spent more time with this woman than anyone else since her mistress and his master had been married.  He had grown very fond of her and, like Delaney, had started to see her as a kind of mother figure.

“Ms. Bird,” he said, catching her attention again before the woman went back into the bedroom, “Can you… Can you please at least take this to her?”

“She’s this upset because of Lord Adair,” the woman frowned, “I’m not going to do anything just to help him ease his guilt…”

“He’s dying Ms. Bird,” Harris tried, “He has so much he’s already worrying about but you know to him she is the most important thing in his life and… and the baby now as well.  Please have her eat something at least for the baby’s sake if not for anyone else’s.”

Ms. Bird frowned but at last gave in and took the tray before vanishing back behind the door to Delaney’s room and locking it again.

Very quietly she carried the tray to the table and sat it down before going to her mistress.  Gently, she reached out and touched the other woman’s arm.

“My Lady?  I know you won’t feel up to it… but you should really try to eat something.”

“You’re right,” Delaney said with a hoarse voice, “I don’t feel up to it.”

The Duchess didn’t move and her maid sighed.

“You need to eat Lady Adair.  You need to keep up your strength so you can continue growing that little one in there.  Besides… I’m sure he’s quite hungry by now too.”

Delaney dropped her gaze.  She didn’t want to eat but she knew the maid was right about her baby.  Her hand went to her belly again and she sighed, moving to sit up.

“Fine,” she said quietly, “I will eat something.”

Ms. Bird hovered over her while Delaney picked at her food, eating only a little bit and drinking her tea.  Her stomach had gone from being upset because of the baby to being upset because of its father.  She was thankful that when she said she was finished, her maid didn’t push her.

Ms. Bird helped her mistress undress then and into a nightgown.  They were silent.  The older woman usually had something encouraging to say but this situation had managed to stop even her from seeing a silver lining.

When they were finished, Delaney told her maid to go to bed.  Ms. Bird had argued that she should stay with her but the Duchess insisted she would be fine.

At last, Delaney was alone.  That morning when she had left for Edgewood she had imagined by the time she went to bed she would be happily curled up in her husband’s arms and the world would be right again.

Things were right though.  They were very wrong.  And now she was alone.