My Youth Begins With Loving You - CH 3

Chapter 3: Crushing on the Mensao Man (3)

Trimming the excess off the square chiffon cake and slicing it into layers, Miao Yuan spread chocolate cream—made from a secret recipe—in-between each layer. Next, she moved onto frosting it: dusting half of the top with cocoa powder and pressing three cocktail sticks bound by the tips into it, creating the impression of bird tracks. As for the other half, she paused for a moment in thought, before using white icing to write the two lines:

Heaven is too far away, ‘Earth’ is just perfect.

Miao Yuan narrowed her eyes and looked at the results before releasing a long, slow breath. Using a cake knife, she moved the cake onto a white porcelain plate. She then opened the glass door of a refrigerated case, and placed the cake on the top shelf. This was her most elaborate work, and she hoped that many people would see it.

On his way out, Chen Mo took note of the cakes in the display case, and could not find the one that he ate. The square cake had been placed in the refrigerated case, and wouldn’t have been taken out for customers. Thus, he noticed the difference between heaven and earth.

Miao Yuan saw his gaze and misinterpreted it, thinking that he wanted the cake. Stammering, she tried to explain that the cake was made for the shop’s anniversary, and was not for sale.

She had anticipated seeing Chen Mo look crestfallen, but was left feeling a little disappointed.

Chen Mo simply nodded his head in response and pushed the door to leave. The door chime rang melodiously and bright as always.

Miao Yuan felt that the afternoon was indeed wonderful.

In this world, some will see newborn babies and cry, knowing that the babies will lose their childhood naivety and grow old with wrinkles upon their faces. Some will see a straight road and become sad, knowing that not all will be smooth sailing, and that a fork lies ahead.

But we still fall in love again and again. Sometimes we beg for love to no avail. Other times it answers our pleading, and yet by that time, it is us who have become indifferent. Sometimes we want to preserve what love we have, yet it’s the other person who wants to leave. We’ve been hurt. And at the same time, we’ve hurt others. Yet we never learn, losing control of our hearts again and again.

Perhaps, you cannot help who you fall in love with. If your heart is free from worries, it finds love on its own.

When we encounter love, we still feel that rush, but we already know better. We know that all love will eventually dissipate, and that all lovers will eventually split. The changes of time are not something us mortals can withstand.

But so what?

In a room illuminated by the glow of dusk and scented with intermingling coffee and cocoa aromas, Miao Yuan cheerfully whistled a tune. Precisely because this feeling was fleeting, it had to be fully appreciated before it faded away.

The evening anniversary celebration was lively. Shop employees from various branches all gathered together, and Miao Yuan’s new confection received high praise.

The boss giddily asked Miao Yuan while holding the cake, “Xiao Miao1, have you thought about mass producing this?”

Miao Yuan thought for a moment before giving an outrageous price.

Her boss left dejectedly, clutching her shattered glass heart.

This was Miao Yuan’s bit of selfishness.  When the cake came into existence, that person had left his mark on it. Miao Yuan hoped that forever and ever, the cake would be savoured only by him—well, at least while this special existence between them hadn’t faded.

A special person fills life with joy. If someone loves a flower, of which just one single blossom grows, in all the millions of stars, it is enough to make him happy just to look at the stars. It’s as if a flower blooms on each star2.

Miao Yuan bid her colleagues farewell and then headed back home with a skip in her step. On the side of the road, she found a pebble and kicked it hard. The evening’s cool crisp air whipped past her face, causing a bit of nose congestion. This was an unfamiliar big city. She threw her arms open and spun, watching the myriad of lights that peppered the night twirl around her.

At first, because Miao Yuan lived at one corner of this city that was too big and old, she lacked a sense of belonging. She wondered, “Why must I stay here? What’s so special about this place? Why can’t I just leave?”

But today, everything made sense. In a city, if you had a special person there, you’d look at the myriad of lights with a slight smile. For he would be behind one of those windows, or in front of one of those lamps.

Today, he seemed to have quarrelled with his girlfriend, Miao Yuan thought. She hoped that the chocolate would cheer him up a little. That chocolate was able to light an explorer’s eyes up. It was as close as you could get to the taste of love. It was a delicacy bestowed by the gods!

Several days after that Saturday, Chen Mo did not show up. But Miao Yuan still maintained a chipper mood. Love dyed the world pink, and a moment’s dopamine spike had long lasting effects before slowly wearing away. Miao Yuan was still on that dopamine high.

She beat the yolks and sugar until it started formed a ribbon-like consistency. Using a wooden spoon, she folded in mascarpone cheese, which had been kept at a suitable temperature. The cheese stuck to the spoon, but everything slowly started coming together with a creamy consistency. The electric mixer then whisked it smooth.