New Vegas: Sheason's Story - Chapter 159: Panzerschreck

Brothers and sisters of the Enclave! Today, you are the hands that bludgeon! The teeth that bite and tear! You are the beating heart of this great nation – the vital organ that keeps America alive! With your blood, you nourish us all! In truth, I envy you. To fight the enemy of our nation, to face the mutants that infect our land like a disease… it is an honor we all aspire to! Our flag means nothing if not held aloft in the hands of the mighty. And today, it is you who now carry it!

“You strapped in back there?” I called out over my shoulder. My voice seemed strangely muffled by the metal cocoon surrounding me. I was expecting more of an echo.

“Cocked, locked, and ready to fuck shit up!” Cass yelled back at me from the gunner chair. “So, d’ya really know how to drive one of these things?”

“Oh, yeah!” I said, settling back into the driver seat, and grabbing hold of the two levers sticking out of the floor between my legs. “I mean, it’s not a Corvega in here, but it’ll be like driving a bulldozer!”

“… You know how t’drive a bulldozer?”

“Absolutey!” I yelled back. “I had a job in construction, ’bout ten years ago! This’ll be a cinch!”

I hoped, I didn’t say aloud. Truth be told, it did seem quite a bit more high-tech and complicated than the last bulldozer I drove. There were a whole lot more screens and buttons than a bulldozer, certainly. And the only actual window looking outside was a periscope roughly the size and shape of a mail slot. But if I was reading all these labels correctly, then these screens in front of me were connected to cameras mounted on the hull. There also appeared to be a dedicated tactical map, complete with radar – like the motion tracker on my helmets HUD, only better – and… was that some kind of radio?

Wait a minute, I know what that is!

“You know, I just thought of something,” Cass had to shout, since I’d just fired up the tank, and everything started to shake. The engine sounded like amplified thunder in here! “Tuera’s out there in that giant robot suit, fucking shit up, right?”

“I believe so, yes!” I shouted back, turning on the cameras, one by one. The screens winked on, giving me a panoramic – and, surprisingly enough, full color – view of the garage. Tactical readouts winked into life, showing outlines of soldiers just behind the wall – like the IFF spotter display in my helmet, only vastly more powerful. I turned to the communication panel, and started tracking the signals that appeared on the radar, trying to find the one I wanted.

“How will she know not to fuck US up?” she yelled at me.

“Way ahead of you on that one!” I said with a thumbs-up. I found the signal I was looking for, and the radio screen started flashing the words CONNECTING… “Tuera! You readin’ me?” As if on cue, Tuera’s face appeared (also in full color), and I couldn’t help but blanch slightly; a long trail of blood was splattered on the left side of her face, leaking out from a deep gash on her forehead. She did a double take, and stared at the screen with surprise and confusion.

“Sheason?” There was a flash from somewhere that lit up her face, and she ducked slightly before dividing her attention between the monitor and piloting the mech. “What are you… how did you get on this frequency? How’d you find it?!”

“We found a tank!” I yelled back at her, and she looked even more confused. “Lock onto this signal, and don’t kill us!” I looked back over my shoulder. “Hey, Cass? You wanna know something? I don’t like the way that wall is lookin’ at us!”

“GO FOR KILL!” Cass shouted back with a laugh. I settled back in the chair, put the tank in gear, made sure the levers were pulled back fully, and revved the engine. The whole tank rumbled violently, like a wild animal in a cage… snarling and ready to pounce.

That’s about when Cass fired the main gun.

Even muffled by the armor of the tank, it threatened to blow out my eardrums. It sounded like a smaller version of the plasma cannon blast the Mega-Patriot fired earlier. The image on the monitors in front of me flickered and distorted from the shockwave. Within seconds the door was reduced to rubble, fire, and a massive cloud of smoke. And if the disappearing red outlines were any indication, quite a few troops were taken out in that blast as well.

“LET’S GO!” I shouted, leaning forward on the two control levers; immediately, I was thrown back into the chair by the tank lurching forward, up and over the rubble, and straight through the fire like it was nothing. The speed itself wasn’t really all that fast, like in my Corvega… it was just immediate.

And speaking of immediate: once we cleared the smoke and fire, I could see a cluster of power armored soldiers in front of us, accompanied by more robots. Some of them were backing up, firing their weapons at us, and I could hear the soft plinks and ptangs of plasma weapons bouncing harmlessly off the hull. But there was at least one cluster of infantry, right in front of us, trying in vain to run away.

I want to say they were arranged like bowling pins, but maybe that was just a trick of the light.

Thuump. Ta-thump-thmp. Thum-ump. Thump.

The tank didn’t even slow down, and the only impacts I felt from the bulky power-armored soldiers I was running over barely seemed to register as speed bumps.

“The fuck was that?” Cass yelled at me.

“Seven-ten split!” I called back. Ahead of us, I could see the rolling hills and ruined buildings of the tank Proving Ground. Moving amid the ruined concrete frames of bombed-out structure used as target practice, I could see… “Eyes front! Infantry on the way!” As I spoke, several of the robots turned their weapons on us, sending a volley of plasma bolts our way. It sounded like we were being hit by pebbles.

“Got it!” Behind me, I could hear the heavy grind of metal on metal as the turret moved. It looked like the ‘infantry’ was mostly robots, but they still tried to scatter. A beam of bright blue energy lanced out from the top of the screen, shaking the tank with the recoil. The beam hit the base of the structure; the ground exploded, sending robots and bits of flaming concrete a good twenty or thirty feet into the air. It was like the whole hill had been covered in C4!

“FUCKIN’ HELL!” Cass laughed raucously, angling the turret again. “I have gotta get me one’a THESE! Ha-haa!”

I looked down at the tactical map, and saw several markings off to our right. A couple of triangles, and at least two squares… The dozens of small dots were infantry, I’d figured out that much already. But I couldn’t tell what the others were, because there was no key. Only one way to find out…

“Hang on to something!” I yelled. I pulled back on the right lever, and the whole tank lurched to the right. Although, ‘pivot’ is probably a more accurate word for what happened. This thing could turn on a fuckin’ cap! I could probably get this thing to tap-dance if I really wanted.

Right, focus, you idiot. I pushed forward on the stick just as soon as the enemy vehicles came into view, and the tank heaved forward again. There were at least four tanks and two of those combat walkers. That meant triangles were tanks, squares were mechs. The tanks seemed smaller than the one we were in, but only just. The walker on the left made a charge for the walker on the right, using one of its arms to deflect the hail of incoming mingun fire.

“There’s Tuera!” I shouted. She shoulder checked her big robot straight into the other mech, knocking it over with a crash… but that left her open to attack from one of the other tanks. “Cover the rear! Hit that son of a bitch behind her!”

“Firing!” Cass shouted. The tank behind Tuera was stationary, angling its turret to get the best shot… and then it was hit by a giant beam of light. The blast hit the side of the hull, right under the turret, sending up a shower of sparks and superheated plasma. Impressive, but I couldn’t tell if we’d killed it or not.

“Hit him again!” I shouted, slowing us down to give Cass a better shot. Smoke and fire was pouring from the side of the tank where we’d hit it, but the turret was definitely still moving…

“Take it!” Cass shouted back. Another streak of white lightning hit the tank dead-on. The turret was engulfed in plasma fire; the next thing I knew, the whole damn turret popped off, crashing off to the side in a shower of molten metal and fire. Every orifice on the tank was belching green fire and smoke. “Fuck yeah! Smoked ‘im!”

Meanwhile, Tuera seemed to be having an easier time of it than us: after knocking over the other walker, she maneuvered her mech over to one of the tanks, grabbed the front of it, and flipped the bitch! It teetered unsteadily on its back armor for a few seconds, treads spinning furiously, before it toppled upside down – straight onto the other tank.

“You need to keep moving,” I heard Tuera’s voice through the radio, as she turned around and approached us in her mech. She certainly looked awfully exposed, sitting in that thing with no harness or seatbelt, no cockpit canopy, and nothing to stop anyone from taking any pot shots at her. “Go straight up the middle, through the proving ground. I’ll cover your flanks.”

“Got it,” I nodded, glanced at the radar, and turned back to Cass. “Get ready! More infantry behind us!” I yanked back on the left stick, and we pivoted again, spinning the tank a full 180-degrees before pushing both levers forward and setting off again. The plinking sounds of plasma fire echoed off the hull as we turned around, and didn’t stop when the soldiers finally came into view.

“Eat this!” The tank shuddered from Cass firing the big gun while I kept us on the straight and narrow. The energy beam reduced a pair of Enclave troops that didn’t get out of the way fast enough into a fine mist, and took out several more when it hit the wall of a ruined building and sent white-hot plasma raining down everywhere. The wall in front of us started to crumble, and I gunned the engine. The tank smashed headfirst through the rubble, but it turned out there was a huge drop I hadn’t been expecting on the other side.

“Oh, fuck! BRACE!” I yelled, trying desperately to follow my own advice. Given that we were in a tank that must have weighed about 170 bazillion tons, I was expecting the whole thing to just go ‘clunk’ and drop off the edge immediately in a huge crash of twisting metal. But instead, we kept going straight and level, long after I thought we should have dropped. And then: CRASH! The tank smashed against the side of the cliff, like we were attached to a hinge, and the next thing I knew, the tank was driving straight down a nearly vertical incline.

“Jesus, man!” Cass yelled at me when the tank leveled out with another crash. “Take it easy!”

“No time!” I glanced back down at the radar. “Two more tanks, coming in from the right!”

“On it!” She called back. I could hear the turret moving – and firing – again, and I desperately tried to get my bearings. But before I could, the ground ahead of us exploded.

“SON OF A –” I tried to go around, but I was too late. The tank plowed straight through the expanding ball of plasma and debris. A few warnings on the monitors started blinking and yelling at me, but we did manage to come out the other side. I think. The dust and smoke had become very thick.

And still the tank charged forward.

“On the left!” Tuera’s voice barked in my headset. Sure enough, I checked the map and saw the icon for Tuera’s mech, moving behind us, heading straight for another tank coming for us from the left. I couldn’t see the markers for the other two tanks on our right, which probably meant Cass got them. Hopefully.

“Eyes up!” I yelled, trying to maneuver us into a better firing position. Enough of the smoke cleared, and the tank ahead of us seemed to materialize out of thin air. The barrel didn’t need to move. It was aimed squarely at us. “FUCK!” I slammed us in reverse, trying to get out of the way. Behind me, I could hear the mechanical grind of the turret straining to move into position…

The whole tank shook, almost as much as it had from falling down the cliff. More warning klaxons screeched, and a wireframe of the tank appeared at the edge of the rightmost screen, showing a large chunk of the right side of the tank covered in red dots. And as bad as it was, when I looked up I realized: it could’ve been a lot worse. Tuera’s mech was holding onto the barrel of the enemy tank in front of us with its gigantic metal hands, and I realized that she had shoved the barrel off target.

“Hit him!” Tuera yelled at me through the radio. “Hit him now!” While she spoke, she grabbed the front of the tank with the mech’s free hand, and tilted it up like the other tank from before – exposing the soft, lightly armored underbelly. She held it in place with the right hand and turned away, shooting at another target with the minigun under the left hand.

“FUCK YOU!” Cass shouted, and the tank shook again. A white flash of plasma hit the enemy tank in a blast of molten metal that blasted it out of Tuera’s hands. The enemy tank must have flown at least ten or twenty feet away from us, before collapsing onto its turret in a flaming wreck.

How much longer could we keep this up? I thought to myself, slamming the tank back into drive and gunning the engine. Despite the warnings, the tank was still running. But there were tons of blips on the radar: hordes of infantry, more tanks, and even a few more walkers, all of them closing in on us. And, if I was reading the map right, we were only halfway through the hilly, broken terrain of this tank proving ground.

“They’re backin’ off!” Cass yelled at me, before firing the big gun again; it felt like she was aiming behind us.

“Wait, what?” I asked, looking at the map again. “How can you tell?”

“Well, that’s what it looks like…”

The tank came to a screeching, shuddering, grinding halt. All the lights in the interior switched off at once, and the engine cut out with a cough. Apart from the minimal light coming from the periscopes, we were doused pretty much in pitch darkness. The sounds from outside were muffled, and everything inside the tank was unexpectedly still.

“The fuck?” Cass asked, still yelling; her voice echoed in the suddenly still tank.

“What happened?” I asked aloud, the bottom of my gut falling out. I tried flipping some of the switches, but… everything was dead. “I didn’t…”

The radio switched on with a burst of static.

“You didn’t think it would be that easy, did you?” Eden’s voice sent chills up my spine.

“What the fuck?!” Cass yelled. Clearly, she’d heard him, too. “The fuck is he doin’ in here?!”

A series of clunks reverberated through the tank, and the engine fired up again. The monitors were flickering, but weren’t showing me anything except a loading progress bar… and that was very worrying, since I heard (and felt) a very loud boom somewhere ahead of us. What was that, an explosion? I could feel the sweat beading on my forehead underneath my helmet as I grabbed the periscope and looked through the tiny mail slot.

There was a cloud of dust ahead of us with a vaguely humanoid shape somewhere inside, looking out with a pair of yellow eyes, glowing menacingly. I couldn’t make out any details through the dust, but I didn’t need to: it was the silhouette of a walking mountain of a man, wearing a set of huge power armor. In one hand was a ridiculous tower shield, and in the other was an enormous warhammer.

“FUCK!” I shouted, trying to get the tank to move again. “CASS! TWELVE O’CLOCK!” I hit reverse, and the tank started to go backward, just as Panzer emerged, charging at the tank and closing the gap.

“Firing!” Cass yelled. The tank shook, and my tiny field of view was filled with a white hot light. I tried to squint away the blinding flash… and watched in horror as the energy hit his tower shield, and he knocked it away! The beam ricocheted off the shield and speared off to the right, exploding a piece of scenery just out of view. Panzer just kept on charging us without even breaking stride.

What thefuck?

“AGAIN!” I yelled with my foot jammed against the throttle. Fuck sake, why doesn’t this thing have a faster reverse gear?! “HIT HIM AGAIN!”

The whole world shook… and at the same time, everything stopped. My helmet banged against the metal wall next to me, and I was practically thrown out of the driver seat. When I finally managed to pull myself up to look through the periscope again, I saw the end of the big gun’s barrel bounce past; it had been sheared completely off. Panzer’s gigantic armored mitts were clamped down hard on either side of the tank. I could feel the vibrations of the treads still spinning, trying desperately to move us, but we weren’t moving.

“Fuck!” Cass shouted. “What the fucking fuck!”

The whole tank shook again. I was thrown around the inside of the cabin, and suddenly realized just how much like a coffin this driver’s seat was… Fucking hell, he was picking up the tank, and tossing us around like it didn’t weigh anything! Panzer’s deep, bellowing laughter started echoing through the tank. I caught another glimpse outside – those were definitely pieces of the treads that Panzer had ripped off.

“You can’t get away, mutant!” Panzer yelled, amid the screech of wrenching metal. I tried to move, but was tossed back into the driver seat again. The metal echoed with impacts, one after another… was he punching the tank or…

“OUT THE BACK!” I yelled back at Cass, finally figuring out what Panzer was doing. “GO! WE’VE GOTTA BAIL!” I tried getting out of the seat, but the whole tank lurched, and I was thrown back in. The sound of wrenching metal right above my head got worse. I reached behind me, trying to pull the Jury Rigger out of the spot behind me.

“Shea!” Cass yelled. “What are –”

“FUCK SAKE! JUST GO!” I shouted, scrambling out of the drivers seat. The metal roof above me started to cave in from the impacts. Sparks rained down on my head, and the turret… oh, fuck me! The whole turret was at an angle! He was ripping the fucking thing off the tank!

“Come on out, mutie…” Panzer snarled. There was one last sound of wrenching, twisting metal, and the whole turret above my head came free. Shards of metal and sparks rained down on my head, and suddenly there was nothing separating me from that gigantic metal bastard. He tossed aside the turret, and picked up his warhammer again.

I didn’t say anything. I had nowhere to go. I didn’t even know if Cass had gotten clear, or what. I just took aim with the Jury Rigger and aimed for Panzer’s face, firing LAER bursts at his helmet again and again. It barely even seemed to stagger him. In desperation, I let go of the end of the Jury-Rigger, grabbed the Alien Blaster with my now-free hand, and fired them both. The bolts from the alien weapon exploded against the side of his face, showering me with sparks and plasma, but…

“That won’t work!” he boomed, tearing open a bigger hole in the tank while half his helmet was still on fire. “Time to die!” He lifted his warhammer high over his head, and even though I was still trying desperately to scramble out of the way, I knew that I was completely and entirely fucked.

And then, astoundingly, I wasn’t.

Several explosions hit Panzer in the back. Fire came raining down in torrents all around him. On reflex, I brought up my arms to try and protect myself from the fire and shrapnel. Panzer seemed just as confused as I felt. He turned around, and I used the opportunity while he was distracted to try and get the hell out of this fucking deathtrap. As I tried desperately to escape, I caught a glimpse around Panzer’s massive frame:

Off in the distance I could see Tuera’s mech, smoke pouring from the now empty shoulder-mounted missile pods.

“YOU TRAITOR!” Panzer yelled, smashing his warhammer against his shield with a deafening bang. “YOU FILTH!” With that last outburst, he started stomping away, charging forward at Tuera’s walker while she charged at him.

“Fuck fuck fuck fuck…” I muttered frantically, desperately scrambling up and out of the twisted metal salad that used to be a tank. I couldn’t stay here. I had no idea where Cass had disappeared to. I just watched in dumbstruck horror as the two giants behind me started beating the shit out of each other. Then, while Tuera’s mech slammed a fist straight into Panzer’s face, sending him hurtling to the ground, I heard a voice through my headset:

“Shea!” Tuera yelled at me, her transmission intercut with bursts of static. “GO!”

So I ran.

I couldn’t think about what I was doing. I just ran as fast as I could across the pock-marked and broken ground, away from the wrecked tank. The rumble of more tanks and the thuds of dozens – maybe hundreds – of boots behind me kept getting closer. Ahead of me I could see a series of bombed out concrete structures, that looked like they’d been used for target practice. It wasn’t much, but it was better than nothing.

“There he is!” I head a voice yell behind me. “All units, engage!”

“FUCK!” I dove through a window frame just as the air was filled with flying plasma. Broken pieces of concrete rained down on my back. I rolled onto my hands and knees, keeping as low as I could while I tried to crawl away.

A high pitched whistling from high above my head grew louder and louder. At first, I didn’t want to believe what I was hearing: the last time I’d heard a sound like that was from the first time I tried to enter Nellis.

Within seconds, I was back on my feet, activating the jets in my rocket boots. If the Enclave had my position targeted with artillery, then I needed to be someplace else as quick as I could. I careened through the air just as the first of the massive explosions tore up the ground behind me. Plasma bursts were streaking through the sky all around and –

There was a sudden bang next to my foot that threw me off balance. The next thing I knew, I was spinning through the air, wildly out of control. I couldn’t see where I was headed or what the fuck was going on; I just heard the explosions from more artillery ripping up the place, the sizzle of plasma streaking through sky all around me, and the rush of wind blasting past my helmet.

I slammed back-first into the ground, tumbling end over end across the rutted landscape several times before collapsing in a heap of aching, screaming body parts. The armor I was wearing must have taken the worst of it, since it didn’t feel like I had any broken bones… but it was still a hell of an impact. My head was spinning, and I could barely see. I groaned and strained, pushing up off the ground to try and figure out where I was and what the fuck had just happened…

Off in the distance I could still see the explosions from artillery chewing up the scenery, and intermittent bursts of bright blue plasma were streaking through the sky. The rocket boot on my left foot was sparking violently and belching smoke. One of those assholes must have clipped me while I was flying through the air, desperately trying to get away from the big fuck-off artillery strikes.

“Shiiiiit…” I wheezed out through gritted teeth, reaching down to unhook the rocket boots. “Sonuva bitch…” I tossed aside the useless, melted metal, and tried scrambling to my feet… but my knees gave out, and I collapsed against the side of the concrete wall I’d landed next to. “Fer fuck sake…” The ground shook from another round of artillery, and I could see figures appear over the other side of the ridge. I gripped the Jury Rigger tightly, taking aim…

A hand came out of nowhere, grabbing me from behind, and pulled me onto the other side of the concrete wall. I felt – rather than saw – a pair of arms and legs wrap around me. I yelped in confusion, and an unseen figure shushed me seconds before a rainbow miasma enveloped my body.

“Shut up fer a minute…” a voice hissed at me, and I unexpectedly disappeared.

“Cass?” I asked in confusion. Of course it was Cass. I must have hit my head harder than I thought.

“Don’t worry!” Sue squeaked from somewhere near my ear. “We’ll keep you hidden!”

I nodded (uselessly) and tried to catch my breath. The ground shook from heavy footfalls, and the shadows from several power armored soldiers moved past us on the other side of the broken concrete wall.

“He can’t have gone far!” one of them barked. “Spread out and find him!” The boots just kept stomping, and the soldiers just kept coming. One of them looked on this side of the wall, plasma rifle at the ready. Cass and I kept deathly still; he was practically close enough to trip over us… but after scanning the area, he turned on his heel, and moved off, apparently satisfied that nothing was here.

“We’ve gotta keep movin’…” Cass whispered at me as soon as the footfalls became more and more distant.

“That’s my line,” I grunted back softly. There was a rainbow shimmer, and the two of us appeared. “Thanks for the save.”

“C’mon,” Cass grabbed me by the shoulder, urging me forward. “There are some trenches over here. I think we can use ’em to escape.”

The two of us kept low, trying to keep out of sight. To be honest, it wasn’t really a trench so much as a deep ditch that we were moving through. On the plus side, we didn’t have to keep that quiet anymore, because a column of tanks was rolling past, causing all sorts of racket. But on the downside, that meant the fucking tanks were here.

“Fuckin’ hell…” I muttered, following Cass. “Where to?”

“Th’ fuck y’askin’ me fer?” Cass snapped. “You’ve got th’ fuckin’ map!”

I cursed under my breath, and the two of us ducked further down out of sight. Another squad of infantry was passing close by, marching in the tracks left by the tank they were following.

“We should be close,” I whispered, checking the map on my Pip Boy. “If we keep moving, I think we’ll make it. Just so long as there aren’t any more surp –”

A building on the edge of the proving ground to the left of us exploded. Cass and I both dropped to the ground immediately, and I cursed my big fat mouth for tempting fate the way I did. Was it more artillery? It didn’t sound like it. I hadn’t heard any whistling beforehand. I looked up, and realized that the wall wasn’t really exploding; it was collapsing, thanks to something extraordinarily huge smashing through it. Because both the wall and whatever was crashing through it were so huge and so far distant, it was almost like everything was happening in slow motion

“Oh, fuck!” I rasped out. “It’s Liberty Prime!” I hadn’t expected to see him again. But there he was, in the middle of the rapidly disintegrating wall, tumbling out in a shower of shredded metal, fire, giant limbs, and sparks. Unfortunately, he was crashing through the wall both headfirst and sideways.

That wasn’t a good sign.

“C’mon!” I growled at Cass as she looked up, grabbing her by the shoulder to try and get her moving. “C’mon, we can use the distraction to cover our escape!”

The giant robot toppled into the proving ground with an almighty crash, shaking everything around with the force of an earthquake. It was hard to tell through all the fire and smoke, but I was certain Prime had seen better days. One side of his head had been ripped open, his left leg looked torn up below the knee, and almost every panel that I could see was either dented, scratched, or missing. The broken remnant of the sword was sticking out of his left arm in pieces.

And then the laughter started.

“YOU’RE A RELIC, PRIME!” The voice of the Mega-Patriot bellowed from the darkness. The other giant robot emerged, and stood over Prime, gnashing a mouth full of sharp, metal teeth. He wasn’t nearly as beat up as Liberty Prime, but the plasma cannon was nowhere in sight, at least. “NOTHING MORE THAN AN OBSOLETE BUCKET OF BOLTS!” Prime tried to pick himself up off the ground, but was kicked back down by the Patriot’s massive metal foot; everything shook and rocked again, like a ship in stormy seas. “JUST MAKE IT EASY ON YOURSELF…” The Patriot reached back with a metal fist. “…AND SUBMIT!”

The Patriot started laughing, and all four of its eyes started glowing a malevolent red. When the fist came down, aimed squarely at Liberty Prime’s head, the image of a meteor hurtling towards Earth seemed disturbingly appropriate.

CLANG!

That’s about when I realized Liberty Prime was down, but not out: he’d reached up and grabbed the Patriot’s fist mid-swing, bringing it to a dead stop. Prime pulled himself back up, amid a whirring of servos and a shower of sparks, while the Patriot looked on in anger and confusion.

“I… COULD DO THIS… ALL… DAY!”

With a single punch, Prime sent the Mega-Patriot flying into another building. The other robot howled and snarled, while Prime just stood there shakily, both fists raised and at the ready.

“WHY THROW AWAY YOUR LIFE SO RECKLESSLY, PRIME?!” The Patriot bellowed, pushing off against the halfway collapsed building, destroying it further. He threw another punch at Liberty Prime, but Prime sidestepped the swing (amid a hail of sparks from every one of his joints), and countered with an uppercut. I half expected the Patriot’s head to pop off, but it just sent him crashing to the ground.

“THAT’S A QUESTION YOU SHOULD ASK YOURSELF!” Prime tried to follow up with another blow, but the Mega-Patriot roared and lunged at Prime, wrapping itself around Prime’s midsection. There was a flurry of flailing metal limbs, and the two robots disappeared back the way they came, into the darkness of the rest of the facility. Hurriedly, the infantry and tanks all seemed to follow suit, chasing after the two giant robots as they tried to rip each other to pieces.

And while the army was distracted, Cass and I slipped away undetected.