Office Diaries - Chapter 147
I glared at each and every one of them. I no longer cared about what they’d think of me after this.
“Look at you, dressed up to the nines, and yet, not all of you are truly successful. Just like everyone else, you work your ȧss from eight to five— kiss people’s ȧsses to keep your jobs, losing sleep and hair for the mistakes you made. Is this the kind of life you’re so freakin’ proud of? Do those pathetic things give you the right to make fun of other people’s success?”
Yes, there was no other explanation of why they were so hostile to Han when they talked about him earlier. They couldn’t accept the fact that the guy they bullied was faring better than them in life.
With each word I said, the look of anger on their faces slowly turned to shame. Most of them couldn’t even look at me in the eyes as I stared at them one by one, pointing at them rudely as I continued, zeroing at their flaws.
“Fatso, baldy— and you, are you a zombie? You look so old and stressed,” I said, earning gasps all over the place.
It was the first time for me to point at people and diss them to their faces. It felt so good. I should have done this a lot earlier. But I was not only here to insult them. I was not without fault as well.
“And I’m the same. I’m a nerdy coward who couldn’t even do her job right, and who couldn’t trust to love again because of some high school trauma,” I announced, totally in too deep, including myself in my lecture. “None of us here is perfect so stop saying bad things about people. Don’t call them ugly. Appearance does not matter. It doesn’t matter at all!”
The room was silent after my last announcement. Everybody was looking at my already tearstained face. But honestly, I never felt better than I did at that time. Finally, after so many years, the words I couldn’t say were all out.
“That was quite a show,” a familiar baritone suddenly commented, making all eyes turn at the far end of the room where a tall, fat person sat on a stool, nursing a glass of wine.
He looked like he was having a great time as he raised his glass in my direction before drinking, and my eyes nearly popped out of sockets.
H-Han?
I wanted to ask, but the man standing lazily next to the big man took my attention.
I wondered to myself as I met those pair of glittering almond-shaped eyes. I wasn’t surprised when the room started buzzing again. Nobody dared speak aloud as they watched the man cross the room towards where I was, but the buzzing did get more intense when the superstar stopped just in front of me, his gaze never leaving my face.
I swallowed hard, not knowing what to do or say. JT’s face didn’t give away any emotion. He just simply stared, and I got nervous and started shifting on my feet.
Was he angry?
He probably saw and heard my scandalous act earlier and was thinking badly of me now.
I was asking myself what to do, pushing myself to say something— anything when suddenly, he smiled. Then and there, seeing his smile, surprising warmth I couldn’t understand blossomed in my ċhėst, and I knew that things would be alright somehow.
“Appearance doesn’t matter?” he asked me while still smiling, and I felt like crying as I shook my head.
I would never be insecure again. I would never compare myself to JT— to question whether I deserved to be with him or not as long as our feelings are the same.
“No, it doesn’t matter,” I whispered my reply and he took my hand in his.
My eyes stared at his big, warm and beautiful hand holding mine and I felt him tug at it, as he turned to face our audience.
“Sorry about the commotion, but I’ll be taking my sweetheart now,” he announced, making everyone in the room gasp out loud. “If you have any questions, please feel free to ask my manager, Han sitting over there. I’m sure you have lots to talk about,” he added as he pointed at the smiling fat man by the bar who raised his hand with a glass in a salute towards us once more.
With a wicked grin, JT pulled my arm, and the next thing I knew, we were walking out of the restaurant, towards his waiting car.
Han. The fat man was really Han, I thought as I looked at the man in question.
He seemed different somehow, but it didn’t matter. My sins, I knew I had to settle it someday, but that day was not now. I would apologize to Han and tell him that I never made fun of him— that I never looked at physical appearances when I fall in love— to say that I was honestly in love with him years ago. I would tell him that and other things as well, but they would all have to wait.
Right now, as I sat next to JT, the man I was now in love with, I started to remember my youthful conviction. Yes, I would never think of myself as unworthy ever again. All that I would ever think of from now on was the fact that I was honestly loved and that I genuinely loved back.
“My heart would break free, and I feel so alive,
If someone like you love me…”
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“Awwww…”Yanee couldn’t help but sigh in satisfaction.
She even raised her thumbs up towards Nixie. “I totally approve of you dissing those guys. You were amazing!”
“No, I’m not,” Nixie denied, but a smile played on her lips remembering that time a long time ago. “But I have to admit that felt really good.”