Office Diaries - Chapter 170

“I love you Anj. Do you love me?”

The writer’s voice was saccharine sweet, his playful and childish nature reflecting on his tone and Anjee once again paused before she chuckled and stood up.

“Who’ll love you, you big baby,” she snorted with a teasing voice as she turned to Peter to ruffle his already disarrayed hair. “Even your mom says you’re a pain in the ȧss,” she continued and she squealed when he moved to attack her funny bones as he always did.

“Who’s a pain in the ȧss?” Peter countered as he reached out to grab her before she escaped but Anjee was already scurrying out of reach, grabbing the jacket that she tossed on one of the chairs, readying to leave as her rich laughter rang inside the room.

“Hey, where are you going?” the writer asked, frowning as he watched her walk away and he followed her out of his room, down the hallway. “You don’t have work today right?”

Anjee had filed a week leave since she was supposed to go somewhere to rest. Since she didn’t go, Peter thought she would spend her day with him like she always did when she had free time.

“I’m going home,” she answered as she sat down by the doorway, grabbed her shoes and started wearing them.

“Why?” Peter asked almost sulkily and once again, she was reminded of a willful child.

“Because Mr. Peter Choi, I will be bothering you if I stayed here,” she said. “Besides, you still have a manuscript to finish right?”

With her question, Peter pouted. “But I have a writer’s block,” he said. “Stay here,” he cajoled but she shook her head. “Why not?”

“Because I have my own writing to do,” Anjee answered with a grin.

Just a week ago, Peter had convinced her to write which was a form of releasing one’s pent up feelings. She decided to try her hand on it today.

“You stay here and try to finish your work okay?” she said as she tiptoed to pat Peter on the head like a huge pup before she turned to leave. “See you,” she said, smiling before she turned to walk out of the door, leaving Peter standing there watching her go.

“Anjee, you didn’t answer my question again,” Peter whispered sadly as she disappeared from his sight.

=======

The air conditioner hummed as minutes passed. Her huge pair of eyes stared at the piece of paper resting on the table as she nibbled on the end of her pen, trying to analyze what she had written so far.

She had always liked music— always wanted to create songs but never had the courage to try writing them as a profession. Unlike Peter, Anjee didn’t have the confidence to throw everything away and pursue her dream. She wasn’t that brave, and so for years, she had taken the easy way and opted to get a stable office job as she watched with mixed admiration and envy as her best friend followed his ambition.

Also, unlike Peter, there was something else that she couldn’t do.

“I love you Anj. Do you love me?”

Anjee could clearly hear Peter’s voice in her head as he said those words and she played it over and over again, her heart breaking each time she did. Peter did love her, she knew, but only as a friend.

Having watched Peter fight for his dreams and consequently achieving his goals, Anjee had thought that since she grew up with him, what she felt had been a simple admiration. Being with him, seeing him, talking with him however, she suddenly realized that it wasn’t the case anymore. Simple admiration didn’t make one’s heart race. It didn’t make one feel giddy with happiness when you’re with him nor make you bask in despair when that person didn’t have time for you. It didn’t make you go crazy with frustration whenever that person told you he loved you but you couldn’t reply since your kind of love was so different from his love.

Oh well…

Realizing how deep she was with her unrequited love, Anjee had tried to kill her feelings by asking her superiors to transfer her to another city to work. It wasn’t really true that she had asked for a week’s vacation leave. She was planning to leave forever. To run away.

Then again she realized that no matter how much she ran, no matter how far she’d go, her heart would always remain with Peter and so she withdrew her application and decided to stay.

To understand Peter better, she had also decided to face her dreams and try to reach it. She reckoned by doing so, regardless if she succeeded or not, by doing the same things like her love, it would bring her and Peter closer.

With a soft sigh, she lifted the piece of paper and read the lines of the song that’s been playing on her head for a while.

When you look at me my heart race

Was it just an illusion or was there really tenderness on your gaze?

You act like I’m someone you adore

I don’t know what I see in you

I don’t know why I feel that I needed you

And it hurts inside ’cause it’s something I need to hide

I don’t know how it became so strong

I don’t know how I could carry on

And it’s so hard ’cause it’s something I can’t control…

So, don’t ask me if I love you

Don’t ask me if I care

If you’re playing with my feelings

It’s more than I can bear

And if this one-sided romance

Won’t even be given a chance

Don’t ask me if I love you

If this dream of love won’t come true…

Anjee had no idea why in all of the things she could have written, she would have to write this. She felt… vulnerable. She imagined if Peter ever read this first song she’d ever written, would her best friend know about the real her and her feelings? After al, they said that your work reflected what’s in your heart.

“I love you Anj. Do you love me?”

Again, Peter’s voice played in her head and she started to shake. Tears fell from her eyes as she placed the paperback on the table.

“I love you Anj. Do you love me?”

“I love you Anj. Do you love me?”

“I love you Anj. Do you love me?”

With a sob escaping her lips, Anjee covered her mouth as she gave in to her tears.

“I do Peter. I do. But please…please don’t ask me if I love you…”

Because this dream of love wouldn’t come true…

COMMENT 3 comments VOTE 1 left SEND GIFT Load failed, please RETRY

— New chapter is coming soon —Write a review Privileged

More Privileged Chapters

Background default yellow dark

Font Nunito Sans Merriweather

Size

Paragraph comments Chapter comments Write thought liked newest Author:

© 0){ %>Chapter :

Author: Machine Translation

Translator: Editor: