Paper Plane - Chapter 79

For several days, Tang Junhe did not see Yang Xuan again. He was sent to school by Tang Xiaonian, put on the spring school uniform, and started his senior year of high school at two points and one line. Distributing test papers, making test papers, and lecturing on test papers… everything is going on mechanically and orderly. The white papers are passed from the front row to the back row of the classroom. No one will stop. The seats in the class were readjusted. He still sat at the same table as Yin Cong, but the seat moved two rows forward, and the person sitting behind him was no longer Yang Xuan.

The students around him knew that he had skipped class for a week, and they also learned about Yang Chengchuan’s death from the news. They looked at him cautiously, with probing, curiosity and pity in their eyes, but no one dared to talk to him. Even Yin Cong, who was always talkative, kept silent, for fear that he might be emotionally stimulated if he said something wrong.

Tang Junhe returned to his previous indifference. He spoke very little, except for the occasional conversation with Yin Cong. He hardly talked to anyone. Except for doing problems, he still did problems.

The day when Yang Chengchuan’s ashes were buried was the weekend, and when Chen Xing brought Tang Xiaonian and Tang Junhe to the cemetery, Yang Xuan had already arrived. They were both wearing black hooded sweaters, and despite the slight difference in height, they were strikingly similar at first glance.

Tang Xiaonian was not happy about this coincidence, she pulled Tang Junhe to her side, deliberately keeping the distance between them.

Yang Chengchuan’s former leaders and colleagues came in batch after batch. They greeted them like receiving guests and thanked them one after another. Almost all of them were Yang Xuan standing in front, shaking hands with them and thanking them. He has receded from the blow a few days ago, perhaps because he has lost some weight, the contours of his face look sharper, and there are already some shadows of an adult on his body.

Tang Junhe stood behind, watching his brother deal with those adults in a taciturn but decent manner. Everything in front of him was black and white. He thought of the seven days they spent in Sri Lanka, it was like a dream, the salty sea breeze, the blue sea water, the never-ending tide, and the thick and colorful fire clouds… And, he Brother’s smiling eyes. The first sixteen years of his monotonous life seem to be suddenly filled with colorful colors, becoming magnificent and vivid… Is it necessary to live that boring and boring life alone in black and white in the days to come?

After seeing off the guests, the funeral was over. Tang Xiaonian took Tang Junhe’s arm home. Yang Xuan stood in front of Yang Chengchuan’s tombstone, stared at the black and white photo for a while, then turned around and left with his head down. The cemetery is located on the outskirts of the city, so it’s not easy to get a taxi, and the hotel he lives in is a bit far away, so he can’t walk fast, thinking in his heart that if he can’t get a taxi, he will go to the bus stop in front and take a bus back.

Less than a hundred meters away from the bus station, he suddenly heard the sound of hurriedly chasing footsteps behind him. He didn’t look back and walked forward. The owner of the footsteps quickly caught up and pulled his arm , looking at him out of breath: “Brother.”

Yang Xuan looked at him with some surprise. Ten minutes ago, he witnessed the scene where Tang Xiaonian dragged him into the car. Tang Xiaonian held his hand tightly, as if he was afraid that he would sneak away again, and he couldn’t stop talking. Urging him to hurry up. He was a little curious about how Tang Junhe got rid of Tang Xiaonian and ran over, but he didn’t ask anything, just stopped and looked at him.

“Are you leaving?” Tang Junhe raised his chin slightly and looked at him, the corners of his eyes were red.

Yang Xuan knew that he was not asking about going back to the hotel, but about going abroad: “Well, Wednesday.”

“Will there be no contact after you leave?”

Yang Xuan was silent for a moment, then said, “Yes.”

“So brother, are you going to ignore me again?” Seeing that Yang Xuan didn’t speak, he became a little anxious, and began to beg him again, “But I am not disobedient, brother, how can you say nothing? ?”

An empty taxi passed by and honked its horn inquiringly towards them, but Yang Xuan didn’t turn his head to look at them. He just kept silent and said after a while: “Did you hear what your mother said last time?” Bar?”

“But that’s their business… what does it have to do with us?” Tang Junhe’s eyes became more and more red, “I should be the one who should be guilty of my mother, not you, I was the one who deliberately approached you , isn’t it?” He held Yang Xuan’s sleeve tightly, afraid that he would suddenly leave him and walk away, “Brother, don’t ignore me, okay? We’ll still be in secret, just like before… okay? ? My mother won’t know, I will find a way, okay brother?”

He waited wholeheartedly for Yang Xuan to say “yes”, as solemnly as he promised Tang Xiaonian that day. His lower eyelids and even the whites of his eyes were red, and those two black agate-like eyeballs were shining with water, reflecting Yang Xuan clearly on them. Yang Xuan raised his eyes and looked into the distance, avoiding the eyes that were looking directly at him. His two hands reached into his pockets, holding the cigarette case, but he didn’t take it out to smoke. He sighed inaudibly, He said in a low and slow voice: “If you read Yang Chengchuan’s text message, you wouldn’t say that.”

“I won’t read it, it’s just a text message…” Tang Junhe’s voice trembled, like the whine of some small animal.

“The text message said that I am with you for revenge…” Yang Xuan retracted his gaze from a distance, lowered his eyes, took a deep breath, and then exhaled it long, “Revenge on your mother, Tang Little year.”

“But you are not…” Tang Junhe looked at the expression on Yang Xuan’s face, he was a little uncertain, and asked with a trembling voice, “…isn’t it?”

“That cigarette, you should still remember it? I did think about smoking it for you, it will destroy you, and then indirectly destroy your mother, just like my mother back then, who was in so much pain that she wanted to die. “Yang Xuan sighed again, “You went around such a big circle to get revenge on Feng Bo, just to bypass me.” He smiled wryly, and he continued, “You should know that I am not I wanted to stop that cigarette from the very beginning.”

“I know, I know everything…” Tang Junhe said almost desperately, “But didn’t you stop me, brother, you helped me, without you I would have gone to jail a long time ago, even if you really put It doesn’t matter if I ruin it…”

“It really ruined you…” Yang Xuan smiled wryly again, shook his head, and continued, “I took you to Sri Lanka, not because I didn’t think about your mother’s reaction. On the contrary, I was looking forward to her reaction. Losing my son and The pain of losing a mother should be the same, I want to let her experience it too…”

“Don’t say that, please brother, don’t take all your kindness to me as revenge, don’t make me hate you, I don’t know anything if you don’t tell me…”

“But don’t you know now? It’s okay, it’s because you were lucky that you weren’t destroyed,” Yang Xuan pulled one hand out of his pocket, rubbed his hair, and he became that competent man again. Brother, said in that usual flat tone, “Let’s stop here, go to school and take the college entrance examination well…”

“Does this mean that you will never contact me again?” Tang Junhe took two steps back, avoiding Yang Xuan’s hand, holding back the tears that were about to overflow.

“I’m your brother anyway, if it happens…”

“If that’s the case,” Tang Junhe realized that his brother really didn’t want him anymore. In an instant, he was engulfed by overwhelming fear. If he couldn’t beg, he learned how to threaten himself without a teacher, and said sternly, “Then I will never recognize your brother again.”

“It’s not a matter of admitting it or not.”

“Just like I don’t recognize Yang Chengchuan.”

He forgot that his elder brother is a person who doesn’t eat hard and soft, and the moment Yang Xuan turned around and said “that’s fine”, all the threats and ferocity he pretended to collapse, and he chased after him in a panic and held Yang Xuan. Xuan Xuan’s hand, leaving his self-esteem and reason behind, and begged him incoherently: “Brother, don’t ignore me, okay? You can tell me to do anything, don’t ignore me, please, when will you Coming back from abroad? You’ll be back next summer, right? You promised me, please bro, I’m going crazy without you—”

Yang Xuan pulled his hand out of his palm, and the moment their fingertips touched and the two hands separated, Tang Junhe’s begging sound weakened.

He stopped walking, stopped chasing him, and stood where he was, watching his brother go far away in desperation.

Yang Xuan didn’t know how long he walked before he realized that the bus station had already passed by. He wanted to smoke a cigarette, but when he took it out, he found that it had been crushed by himself. He opened it and shook it to see that there was not a whole cigarette left, so he could only find one that was broken. In half, it was lit and smoked.

After going back that day, Tang Junhe developed a high fever for several days in a row. He was seriously ill and lived in a trance. Going to the hospital to get water in the morning, and then going back to school in the afternoon, the chaotic day after day passed like this. He can’t help but recall the details of the relationship between him and Yang Xuan, trying to confirm that what Yang Xuan said that day was all lying to him. But the more he thought about it, the more uncertain he was about this relationship. Yang Xuan never said that he liked him, and it always seemed like he was talking to himself; except when they were making love, Yang Xuan didn’t take the initiative to kiss. The number of times Yang Xuan went to his room was also very small, and he always knocked on his door quietly in the dead of night.

To him, it was a love affair with a high fever, but when he tried to look at everything from Yang Xuan’s point of view, he felt that from the beginning to the end, it was a love affair mixed with revenge and desire. Of.

As for Yang Xuan who helped him drive away Zhou Lin, he regretted the cigarette he handed him halfway, but it was because of his kind nature, just like the time he helped Ying Hui fight, maybe it had nothing to do with liking at all.

His elder brother Yang Xuan is always kind to others, and occasionally helps himself.

They met again later, to go to the notary office to handle the inheritance of Yang Chengchuan. All three of them were present. Yang Xuan suddenly proposed to give up the inheritance, but was told that it was invalid for minors to give up the inheritance. This matter was so lightly revealed, they didn’t say a word to each other the whole time, they didn’t even meet their eyes.

The day Yang Xuan left was Wednesday. Chen Xing originally said that he was going to see him off, but he was temporarily on business and needed to accompany the leader on a business trip, so he could only call to say sorry.

“You can do your work, I am very familiar with the airport, so there is no need to send it off.” Yang Xuan said.

He dragged his suitcase to the airport by himself, went through check-in procedures, and checked his luggage. Although these were all familiar to him, it was the first time for him to do this by himself. In the past, Yang Chengchuan would come to see him off. If he was really busy with business and couldn’t leave, he would let Chen Xing come over. The last time was a little different, he left with his younger brother.

After completing the check-in and walking out of the check-in counter, he was stunned for a moment—Tang Junhe came.

Tang Junhe skipped class again. He was wearing a baggy school uniform, his hair was a little long, his eyebrows were half covered, his face was pale, and he looked very haggard, only his eyes still looked black.

He didn’t cry or make trouble, he didn’t even say “Brother”, he just looked at Yang Xuan with those dark eyes, and said in a hoarse voice, I’ll see you off.

In fact, he seldom cried since he grew up. Except for the evening when he tried to kill Zhou Lin but was stopped, he never shed a tear in front of Yang Xuan. He was no longer the Tang Junhe he was when he was a child.

The check-in counter was not far from the security check, and they walked a short distance together, but this time neither took the initiative to hold anyone’s hand. There are very few people in the security check area of ​​the international channel, so there is no need to queue up, and you can accept the security check when you arrive. At the entrance was a sign of “Stop seeing off people”. Tang Junhe stopped consciously, knowing that he could only send it here.

Yang Xuan also stopped, and turned to face Tang Junhe. The airport was brightly lit, and occasionally someone passed by them, and no one said a word, just looking at each other silently for a few seconds.

Tang Junhe spoke first: “If what you said that day is true, then what I said is also true.”

Yang Xuan remembered what he said – “If this is the case, then I will never recognize you as a brother again.” He closed his eyes, took a deep breath, and then took off the black cotton jacket he was wearing. The coat, with a wave of his hand, covered both of them.

The glare of sunlight was filtered outside, and the small space was completely dark, and no one could see anyone.

When the eyes cannot adapt to the dark, the other senses become extremely sensitive. Tang Junhe felt that Yang Xuan was very close to him, first he breathed on his face, and then his lips moved closer, groping for his.

He was still running a fever, and as soon as those two slightly cool lips touched him, his tears couldn’t be held back any longer, and fell down in an instant, falling on their touching lips.

“Remember that birthday wish.” He heard Yang Xuan say in a low voice, and then, the hand behind his head was removed, the footsteps gradually faded away, and Yang Xuan really left.

Tang Junhe squatted down and cried silently wrapped in the coat. He covered his face and held his fragility in the palms of his hands, but the hands were still too small to hold his sadness, and the tears flowed down his fingers. The seams seeped out and fell down his wrists and chin, like beads from a broken thread, all soaked into the black fabric.