Peace Maker - Chapter 203
He stared at the rock for a minute as another tear fell down his face.
“Ahhhhh…” he muttered, sliding off the tree and resting his head on the grass, his eyes looking up through the layers of the tree to the sun that shone through the leaves to touch him lightly below. “I’m tired Alice…” he mumbled as more tears rolled down his cheeks to the soil below where the rock was planted into. “I-I’m tired. It’s stressful…”
He raised his hand up to the little hole where the sun peeked through and sighed. “You’re listening right?” he asked, a trembling smile appearing on his face, “you’re still here with me right?”
His hand lowered and covered his face as he trembled. “I’m not alone yet right? You’re still watching over me, right? You won’t leave, right? I’m sorry… I-I’m sorry,” he cried his voice quivering as he spoke. “It hurts Alice… it still hurts, a lot. Y-you… Marion… just gone… I’m so lonely down here. I know you want me to be happy and to smile a lot but I just… can’t. It’s so hard to be here alone… without you or Marion and though I try to fill myself with devotion to the royal family, it’s stifling. It’s so much work every day and I can’t rest. I need to keep going, I need to keep pushing, I can’t stop or else I’ll get knocked over with pain and grief.”
His tears continued to flow as he spoke. “I-I can’t be a nuisance to the kingdom. I need to be able to help them whenever they need, and to be on their side at all times. It’s my job… it’s my job and mine only… I just- need to keep going. It’ll- It’ll get easier…”
He peeked through his arm at the little hole in which sunlight touched him, a sigh leaving his lips.
“For now… for now I’ll just breathe,” he muttered with a smile, peering up into the hole. It was clear, her face that was etched into his memory forever. His lips quivered. “F-for now… I’ll just breathe,” he whimpered and collapsed into tears soon after, water flowing out of his eyes like a river.
They wouldn’t stop, they couldn’t stop.
There he stayed under the solace of the tree, crying his heart out. Again and again and again, in hopes his voice would reach the one that watched him from above.
Alice.
*
It was quiet in the palace. Silence in the hallways, and silence in the room he was in. it ever so prominent, it had been for the past few months.
The absence of Dominic, the absence of his prince.
In this silent room, he worked, in this silent room he slept, in this silent room he sat quietly, thinking and remembering. In this silent room, Boris waited.
Time passed by slowly, each day seeming to stretch out and become intertwined in the next, but yet his concept of the days were still very attached. He needed to be informed, he needed to know exactly what day it was, exactly how many days were possibly next and how many days since he left.
Like that, he lived on a time wheel. Constantly waiting for someone, constantly running on the same things again and again. It was dull. He missed colors, he missed feeling the brightness of the room, he missed warmth. He missed gold.
Once again, his hand swoops his signature over a document and he stamps it. Just like he had done before and before that. Just like he had been doing for the last few months.
At some point, it had become second nature to him. To Boris, it had all sunk in, all the documents he had to do, all the work he had been doing, all the work his prince should have been doing. The seat below him was only a few more days to get his torso imprint on the chair.
“Ah…” he muttered leaning back in his chair, turning around, and looking out the wide windows. In front of him was a beautiful sunset with mixes of pink, red, and orange that spread across the large wide sky, and in their watercolor mix were clouds, like little white dots across their wide canvas.
In his bright golden eyes, he saw gray.
“He should be back by now…. Right?” Boris thought to himself as he turned around, looking at the door in which he was expecting someone to walk through. It wasn’t the person he wanted to see but rather who he expected to see.
Almost as if he was on cue, the doors pushed open. Boris looked up with brightened eyes, and despite knowing deep inside it wasn’t him, he still stared with slight excitement. He locked eyes with Kalmin and once again that excitement had been crushed.
“I’m back,” Kalmin greeted, bowing before Boris.
“Please don’t do that,” Boris shook his head, an unintentional sigh leaving his lips.
“Ah-” Kalmin froze, chuckling slightly, “Sorry, I forgot.”
Boris glanced at Kalmin, watching him take off his coat and hang it on the coat-hanger right by the door. Then his eyes trailed him to the couch where Kalmin looked down at the table in front of the couch and the stack of papers on it.
He turned to Boris.
“The stack is lower, I thought this was supposed to be the workload I had to do today? Did you do it?” Kalmin asked, locking eyes with Boris.
“MhHm,” Boris nodded, swiveling back to the sunset view.
“I told you not to do that,” Kalmin sighed, “you have enough work as is.”
“I told you that I wouldn’t listen,” Boris replied turning back to Kalmin, their eyes meeting each other. They stared for a moment before Boris continued, “at least for today.”
Kalmin blinked and turned back to the stack, then let out a sigh as he walked to the side table and picked up a chair, dragging it to the table where Boris sat at. He had gotten to just a few feet in front of it when he paused, noticing that a seat was already there.
“I knew you’d do that so I put it there ahead of time,” Boris noted. Kalmin looked at him before turning around, about to walk back to the table when Boris called him, “don’t. Just leave it there. A servant will be coming soon for supper. When they do, they can just put it back.”
Kalmin turned to Boris and simply nodded, placing down the chair where it was and then walking to the table with the stack of papers on it. “You know that you don’t have to dictate everything that I do right?” he asked in a slightly mocking tone as he picked up the papers and began walking back to Dominic’s desk. “I understand you have pretend-princely duties but you’re very invested in your act when you don’t need to be 24/7.”
“The more you do it, the better you become at it,” Bors shrugged, “I believe you told me this yourself before. Are you going against your own words?”
Kalmin sighed, placing down the stacks of paper in a very loud manner, as if to express just a bit of his annoyance. “You have a very clever way of twisting people’s words, Boris.”
“All the lessons with you did not go to waste,” Boris shrugged with a smirk to which Kalmin lightly chuckled.
He sat down on the chair, and picked up one of the pens on the table, and began working. After a few seconds of writing, he paused and looked up at Boris, their eyes meeting each other. He had been staring. For a bit longer than Kalmin liked. “What is it?” he asked to which Boris tilted his head slightly.
Kalmin immediately flinched, averting Boris’ gaze. In his eyes was a flicker of fear, his eyebrows furrowing slightly.
“Too late,” Boris muttered, his voice at a low tone that sent shivers down Kalmin’s body.
His brown eyes look up hesitantly at Boris, regretting it a moment later when their eyes met again but this time he couldn’t look away. He was trapped.
“You,” Boris muttered, his head straightening as he picked up a pen and began writing on another paper again. “You cried didn’t you?”
Kalmin flinched, the fear in his eye increasing slightly.
“Are you ok now?” Boris asked.
Kalmin froze for a moment before nodding his head solemnly. He let out a sigh, looking away from Boris, and clenched his pen. “Sometimes I wish you were blind to certain things and not so outspoken…” he muttered.
“Are you ok?” Boris asked again, this time his voice carrying more command. Kalmin turned to him, his head nodding.
“I am.”
“Good,” Boris replied as he picked up the stamp and stamped another paper, “then it was a good decision afterall. I’ll make sure she can’t be moved back to the previous place.”
Kalmin went back to his writing and they sat there in silence. That was enough for the both of them, enough was already said. Like this, their relationship had grown. They relied on each other and had grown a bond that was deep. To the point where he could be read like a book and where they could comfort each other with barely any words.
Just like this, together they both coped in their own company together and together they worked to keep the kingdom alive.. It was a lonely job for the both of them and only got more stressful with each repeating cycle but at least they weren’t alone.