Peculiar Love - Chapter 5 The Flame Of Jealousy

I slowly started blinking, desperately trying to open my eyes and see what’s around me. Where am I? As blinding light slowly subsided I caught a glimpse of my surroundings. I was at the infirmary.

Without moving my body, I looked around.

I saw Shaun sitting beside me with his head placed on the corner of the mattress.

I was laying straight, with the sheets over me, my left arm tucked under the sheet, and my right hand enveloped by Shaun’s hands.

I could feel the warmth of his hands so I was still alive.

I could not remember how I got there but I remembered for sure what happened before I fainted. Then it all startled me.

I tried to get up and the movements woke Shaun up.

“Are you alright? How are you feeling now?” He asked supporting my back.

“I’m fine. But what happened? How did I get here?”

“I found you unconscious in the woods and brought you here.”

“I followed you there. I heard from Susan that you were looking for me.”

“Yes, I was, to give you back your cellphone that I found in the class.” He pointed at my phone on the table beside me. “I checked in the library first but you were not there so when I came looking for you in the yard, I saw you walking across the meadows and followed you.”

“Is that what actually happened? My memories differ greatly.”

“I told you how it was, believe it or not.” He got up to leave.

I grabbed his hand to stop him.

“I have a lot to ask and a lot to tell. Hear me out before you go.”

“Claire, we can talk later, you should rest now. I’ll send the nurse to help you.”

He took my hand off his, put it down, and walked to the door of the room.

I threw the sheets off and hastily got up to stop him. But he left slamming the door behind him.

I stood at the door feeling empty.

“His words don’t support his actions. But then what should I believe in?”

I sat back on the bed, recollecting my memories and reflecting on the incident from the woods and those notes.

“Is he really telling the truth? Then who did I follow into the woods? Also about the wolf, I saw the last moment, was he trying to save me from that nasty creature?” “Should I ask Shaun about those notes? But he can’t be behind it. He saved my life, he would never hurt me.”

For the next few days, Shaun avoided me whenever I tried to approach him, he made all possible excuses to run away from me as if he was trying to hide something.

Then one day during dinner, I saw Shaun coming to the dining hall with a GIRL! This was the first time seeing him eat with someone.

“Who is this girl? I don’t think I have seen her before.” I glared at her.

“Ah her, she’s the new student from my class. She is pretty right?” Emily provoked me.

“Not really!” I mumbled

“Oh so Miss Claire is jealous, this should make it in today’s news.”

“No, I’m not!”

“You definitely are.”She chuckled at the astonishment on my face.

“Emily, I said I’m not.”

“Well, for your information, her name is Patricia and she is pretty close to Shaun. I saw them coming to school together and they have been hanging out together all day long. Are you still not jealous?”

“I said I’m not!!” I rumbled banging the table with my spoon.

*****

I didn’t say a word as I stared motionlessly on the wall. I was doing that thing where I overthink.

“Stop overthinking. I’ve told you if you keep doing that you’ll get grey hair. It’s better to go and ask him straight up.” Emily whined.

All of a sudden my eyebrows curled against each other, and my eyes widened. “Should I do that?”

“Of course,” she responded.

I stood up determined and I went straight to the class. Shauna and Patricia were alone in the class, sitting together talking about something. As soon as Shaun saw me he immediately held Patricia’s hand.

Seeing the gesture I lost my mind and instead of asking him about the matter calmly as I planned, I raged.

“I see, so that was your reason for avoiding me all this time. How can you do this to me!? How can you make a fool out of me like that!? You should have told me that you have a girlfriend.”

I controlled my tears.

Patricia tried to speak in but Shaun stopped her.

“Yeah, you’re right she’s my girlfriend so please stay away from me from now on. Since you know about it now, stop clinging to me. I’m taken!”

“Great, congrats on that. And hear this as well, I have a boyfriend from now on too. So stop showing up when I need help, stop coming for my rescue like you care for me!”

I ran before the tears would roll out of my eyes.

Strangely his eyes weren’t cold saying this. It felt as if they were telling me something else, even when he was cutting me off with his words.

I felt that he won’t let me get close to him even though I mean the most to him.

Between us, there was the unspoken that we knew of but couldn’t admit.

I splashed my face with water rubbing the tears off my face. I took deep breaths and calmed myself. I suddenly realized what I said to him before running away. In a rage, or maybe to take revenge, I told him I’m dating someone too!

“Gosh!! Why did you say it Claire, you have never even talked properly to a boy at school. What were you thinking? What are you going to do now?” I whined at myself, scratching my head.

“Emily, can you write me down the names of all the boys in the school who have confessed to me.”

“What’s with this weird request?”

“Please help me Em. That bastard played with my feelings. I need to give him as good as I got.”

“Ah, I see, so the first person my aloof friend liked turned out to be a playboy.” She giggled.

“Are you going to make fun of me too?”

“Just getting the facts straight.”

“Then should we talk about your first love aka Tom the pervert too? Should we?”

“You wanted the list right? Just give me a minute.”

“Now that’s like a good friend.” I grinned.

After going through the list and eliminating all the possible troublemakers. We both decided on Ed. A guy from Emily’s class, who has all that it takes to be an ideal boyfriend.

“But how will we make him put on the act?” I pointed out.

“Why an act? Just date him for real. He’s a nice guy, you might end up liking him. Give it a try at least Claire. Use this chance to get rid of your feelings for that jerk.” Emily suggested.

“Well, you are right, but what if..”

“Leave the buts and ifs for later and give my plan on how to approach him a listen.”

Hearing her ways to approach Ed and get close to him, I was compelled to admire her. She definitely seemed like a person who has a lot of experience with dating.

We went to the dining hall for lunch and seeing Ed having a meal alone, Emily impelled me to join him.

“Can I sit here?” I asked Ed politely.

He looked at me in amazement. “Of course, I mean sure, why not.” he stumbled over his words.

As instructed by Emily, I made it a leisurely meal with much chit-chat and laughter. He was an amiable person so it didn’t take us much to get close but never once did I feel any affection towards him.

*****

It was a physical education session, both Emily’s and my class were gathered in the playing field to have a soccer match.

One moment, when we were halfway through the game, I saw Patricia rushing forward in my direction with the ball, her eyes on the track ahead and face showing her natural exuberance. The next we were both on the ground. She was groaning, her expression was one of shock and pain. Her left foot should have extended to take his weight, instead, it was caught on my foot.

Shaun came running to us, but instead of helping me up, he went to Patricia.

“Patricia, are you alright? Can you get up?”

He sat near her, pulled out his handkerchief, and gave her bruised knee a gentle rub. That made my blood boil.

Ed and Emily came to me and helped me get up.

“Are you hurt anywhere?” they both said at once.

“No, I’m fine.” I hated the fact that I wasn’t injured.

For a split second, a thought ran across my mind.

I wrapped my arms around Ed’s neck and pulled him close to me, his body against mine.

“It’s alright Claire.” Ed slowly moved his hands around me and gently patted my back.

His embrace was warm, but I felt nothing more, my heart remained indifferent. My mind swam not with the heady excitement of the hug but with thoughts of Shaun.

I saw Shaun gazing at us intently. Within the seconds they got up and walked off, I pulled myself away from Ed.