Picking the stars - Chapter 87
The dream was so short that it was only a moment, and soon I woke up.
Song Er’s smile disappeared and her eyes dimmed. She let go of Pei Ji’s arm, touched the car door, and sat in.
When Pei Ji got in the car, Song Er had already fastened his seat belt.
Pei Ji checked uneasy, and sure enough, the drunkard was not credible, and the seat belt was only half stuck in the buckle. She tied it again for her.
“Professor.” Song Er said suddenly, his voice was low, and he still didn’t look so clear.
Pei Ji’s movements paused, and she ignored her.
Song Wei didn’t get a response. She looked at Pei Ji. The eyes that were still bright just now were full of sadness. She asked, “I’m not your kitten anymore, am I?”
Pei Ji raised his eyes to look at her.
Song Wei flinched a little timidly, but didn’t remove his eyes. He still looked at her, stubbornly trying to get an answer from Pei Ji’s mouth.
Pei Ji first looked away and said, “Yes.”
Song Er didn’t speak again all the way, quietly nestled in the seat. After arriving at home, he tried his best to walk by himself, and didn’t lean on Pei Ji again.
Pei Ji settled her on the bed, and she didn’t speak either. When she walked out the door, she felt that behind her, Song Wei kept looking at her, sticking her gaze to her back.
Pei Ji didn’t look back. She went to the kitchen and found the medicine box in the cupboard. She opened it and rummaged. She found out about wine and medicine. When she opened it, she found an empty medicine box.
Pei Ji: “…”
After taking the medicine, I don’t know how to clean up. I took another look at the specifications of this box of medicines. There are 27 capsules in a box, and only three capsules are taken at a time. Can she eat the whole box of medicines. Is it soaking in the wine jar every day?
Pei Ji stared at the empty box for two seconds, threw it into the trash can, and then opened the door to go out.
If you become so drunk and don’t take any medicine, you will have a headache when you wake up tomorrow. The community is full of facilities. She remembers that after five minutes walk, there will be a pharmacy open 24 hours a day.
Song He was lying on the bed and could vaguely hear the movement downstairs.
The sound of closing the door came, dull.
she left. Song Wei thought blankly, clutching the quilt.
Probably because of the effect of alcohol, her reaction was very slow, and the sadness came slowly.
She felt a hopeless sorrow, gradually covering her heart, and in her dazed consciousness, there was only one thought left. There was no future for her and Pei Ji. They ended completely.
Until Pei Ji came back and fell into the water from downstairs, Song Wei saw her suddenly appear again. She stayed for a while, obviously pleasantly surprised, but tears came down in an instant.
Pei Ji sat down by the bed, pulled a tissue and stuffed it into her hand. Song Er hurriedly wiped the tears, but the tears in his eyes could not stop and kept falling.
Pei Ji did not speak either, holding the glass, she went out, a bit cold, her palms pressed against the wall of the glass, feeling the warmth of the hot water passing through the glass.
Song Wei tried his best to calm down his emotions. After a long time, he slowly stopped choking, but his voice was still a little choked: “What are you doing…?”
Her eyes were red, looking at Pei Ji.
Pei Ji and her looked at each other for a moment, put the water cup on the bedside table, took out the newly bought medicine from his pocket, according to the instructions, poured three pills on the bottle cap, put it next to the water cup, and said, “Eat.”
It is a sober medicine. Song Er recognized the words on the pill box.
She sat up, took the water, swallowed the medicine, and then looked at Pei Ji again.
Pei Ji didn’t mean to say more to her, she didn’t seem to want to stay here any more, and she didn’t even look at Song Ye.
Seeing her taking the medicine, Pei Ji said, “Go to sleep.”
Song Wei didn’t want to sleep, but he didn’t dare not listen to her. She lay down, but instead of closing her eyes, she reached out and carefully grasped Pei Ji’s clothes and said, “Can I be friends with you?”
She can no longer be regarded as the professor’s kitten, she will not want her, Song Er thought before, she would never give up, she would chase the professor back.
But how long is it? She won’t have the courage to chase her anymore
Because of her indifferent eyes, because she didn’t even want to look at her more, because she didn’t like her.
Isn’t it okay to be friends?
Just let her have another identity to stay with the professor.
Pei Ji looked down at her hand holding her clothes. She held it very tightly, and the knuckles were a little blank.
“Go to sleep.” Pei Ji said.
She did not answer directly, but meant to refuse.
Song Er’s hand tightened, as if she was afraid that she would get up and leave, she backed down again and looked at Pei Ji imploringly: “The kind of superficial friends who only send blessings during the holidays and festivals are also okay. You can leave me one. Position, Pei Ji, I don’t expect you to like me anymore, leave me a position, please…”
Before she finished speaking, Pei Ji put his hand on her eyes, and she couldn’t see her anymore.
Song Er’s voice also disappeared. She blinked, then closed her eyes, listened to her, and went to bed obediently.
Pei Ji felt her palms gradually wet, Song Er’s tears slid down the corners of her eyes, her lips trembled, but she pressed desperately to prevent herself from making a sound, and finally she couldn’t help it, and her throat made a low noise. He choked like a wounded little beast, and his tears became more and more fierce.
Pei Ji took off his coat, lay on the bed, and hugged Song Wei in his arms, his clothes became wet in an instant. Song Er’s cry was suppressed, so humble that he didn’t leave a trace of dignity.
She didn’t say any more, didn’t ask any more, Pei Ji gently patted her on the back, and said softly: “Go to sleep.”
Song Wei cried for a long time. Later, it may be because of alcohol, or tired of crying. She really fell asleep in Pei Ji’s gentle voice.
Pei Ji hugged her, felt her in her arms, and said softly: “I can’t be friends with you, I can’t see you, and I can’t talk to you.”
After she said this, her eyebrows finally became unsupported and softened.
“I can’t control my softheartedness to you.”
Every time Song Er brought soup, she stood behind the door, listening to her movements outside, and watching the WeChat messages she sent to her.
From the first time she came, she began to look forward to it every day, and every time it was that time, she would wait behind the door and wait for the sound of footsteps outside.
But Song Er didn’t come at the same time every time, sometimes it was earlier, sometimes it was later.
In the next two days, she stood half an hour early and stood behind the door. As soon as Song Er’s footsteps appeared, her heart was lifted up high, and when she left, her heart fell fiercely again. , Fell to pieces.
She couldn’t control herself.
“I just want your guarantee.” I promised that I would not push her away again, but Song Er refused to give it.
Pei Ji didn’t understand at all, why she was unwilling to say a word of assurance. As long as she says one thing, she won’t push her away in the future, and she can’t wait to return to her.
why?
It’s not always so lucky, in case she can’t come back.
Song Er fell asleep with swollen eyes. Pei Ji put her down, looked at her for a long time, and wiped her face with a towel.
Pour another glass of water and put it on the bed.
She reached out and touched Song Er’s forehead, and said gently, “Don’t cry anymore, it’s not good for your eyes.”
Song Er fell asleep quietly, but his eyelids were red and swollen and looked very pitiful.
Pei Ji couldn’t help but say one more sentence: “If you push me away when you need me the most, it means you don’t need me at all. You probably don’t know, let me leave at that time and let me escape. , Face it yourself, I feel very useless and unreliable.”
Or maybe she is so useless, so unreliable. Pei Ji thought about it countless times. If he were a person with a normal personality, would Song Er still bear it alone?
Song Wei frowned tightly, as if the dreams she had experienced were nightmares that made her smile.
“Kitten.” As soon as the name came out, Pei Ji completely softened her heart. She stroked Song Er’s eyebrows and said softly: “We just are not together anymore, but my heart will always be yours. “
After speaking, her own heart started to hurt first. After all, they are not reconciled. They clearly said that they will grow old, and they are unswerving.
If Song Er could agree, she would never push her away.
Pei Ji sat next to Song Er’s bed for a long time, until dawn, she quietly left.
In the early hours of winter, when there was a little light, it was still cold, and there was silence everywhere. When Pei Ji came out, there was no longer the weakness around Song Er.