QT: Don't fall in love with the Male Lead - Chapter 146: Don't leave dance practice

Xi Zirui stares at the holo screen for a long time, enough for the video to run its course and replay several times.

He keeps getting fixated on Han Yu’s mischievous smirk.

The worst part isn’t even that Han Yu only got close to him because of some strategy to make it to the final. It’s the emptiness of realizing he’s been imagining the stirring of the connection between them in each interaction, while Han Yu was seeing a popularity counter.

It shouldn’t even surprise him, Han Yu can be very mercenary, like that.

When he wants something, he goes for it, no questions asked — it’s just too bad that in this world Xi Zirui isn’t it.

Eventually, he musters the strength to turn off the holo screen and get out of bed.

He knew from the start that he wasn’t a good fit in this world.

Forget what Ni Ni said, it’s too much work. He can’t wait around for people to vote him out, he’s going to talk with the production and say he wants to leave. If it kills him in this world then what?

There will be another, and another, until this all stops for good or Xi Zirui finds a way to return to his original world.

He gets into the shower, and immediately crumples against the tiled wall, glad there aren’t any cameras in the bathroom.

It feels like each time he says goodbye to Han Yu things become harder.

It was easier to pretend that everything was fine when he thought Han Yu remembered him at least a little.

He doesn’t know if he has it in himself to do this all over again. Not after the twins.

How many times can you have a second chance to rebuild a life from scratch, before it becomes a burden instead of a blessing?

—

When he makes it out into the living room Han Yu is sprawled out on one of the sofas, watching TV upside down.

He smiles and sits up straight as soon as he sees Xi Zirui. “Gege, I thought you were going to sleep forever.”

Xi Zirui can’t even manage a weak smile in reply. “We should probably go,” he says, lowering his head as the cameramen trail after him.

“Aren’t you going to eat something first? I made you breakfast,” Han Yu says, bounding after him.

Xi Zirui lets out a self-deprecating scoff. That’s the kind of thing that would have made him all flustered just a day ago, too bad that now he knows Han Yu is doing it for the cameras.

“I’m not hungry,” Xi Zirui says, putting on his sneakers at the door and wrenching it open without another word.

Outside the front door of the NNI house there’s another stretch of garden leading into what the production calls the “Academy” — the place where the contestants train and have their lessons, practicing songs and choreography for the weekend performances.

Han Yu catches up to Xi Zirui when he’s halfway across the manicured garden. “Gege, hold up, what’s going on?”

Xi Zirui shakes him off as gently as he can. “I don’t think I’m the right person to be your ‘buddy'”

The fingers wrapped around his wrist fall away like dry leaves from the branch. Xi Zirui doesn’t look back, so he doesn’t see the fleeting look of panic that crosses Han Yu’s eyes.

—

Inside the Academy, they’re led to a room where they’re told to sit in two bean bags and have a short chat about which person they want as their mentor for the training ahead.

It’s supposed to look casual and fun, and easy to edit together with the rest of the ‘candid’ footage.

Xi Zirui isn’t feeling very cooperative, though.

He sits down and turns to Han Yu with a mechanic smile. “I want to train with Liao Min.”

Behind the cameras the production assistants gesture at Han Yu to say something in reaction. He manages an unsteady, “Uh, why?”

‘Because she’s the most likely one to not care if I don’t do anything for two hours’, is the real answer, but Xi Zirui thinks everyone in the room might have a problem hearing it.

“Her name is pretty,” he says instead, with a last shrug before getting up from be bean bag.

A girl with a short bob haircut tries to stop him. “That’s it? Don’t you want to give it another go, make it sound more exciting? You won’t get any fans being that dry and uninteresting.”

Xi Zirui smiles, and for the first time that day it’s a real smile. “Good.”

—

Reluctantly, the production calls Liao Min while Han Yu and Xi Zirui get changed in the dance studio and wait for her arrival.

Han Yu tries repeatedly to start a conversation but Xi Zirui cuts him off each time.

It doesn’t deter him.

He tries to approach Xi Zirui once more, look him in the eye as he says, “Gege, I don’t know what you were told, or what you’ve seen, but I-”

Xi Zirui stops him with a hand on his chest. “Who are you calling gege? We just met, maybe you should dial back the familiarity.”

That finally puts a stop to Han Yu’s attempts to engage Xi Zirui. He sticks to the opposite corner of the studio, from then on, eyes trained on his own shoes.

Liao Min finally comes in, looking less than thrilled to find herself on the dance studio so soon after finishing practice with the rest of the trainees.

“Being popular really is a curse,” she says, running a hand through her close cropped hair. “Couldn’t you have gone with another mentor? I could use the rest.”

Neither of them answers her.

She looks at the distance between the two of them with her eyebrows raised. “This is going to be fun,” she says with a sigh.

—

Liao Min wants them to practice a couple’s routine together.

“Purely to test things out,” she says, raising her arms defensively. “I’m most likely going to give it to someone else, because frankly speaking your chemistry is atrocious right now.”

Xi Zirui tilts his head in Han Yu’s direction. “Just practice something else with him, I don’t want to dance.”

“Then why am I here?” Liao Min asks, her hands on her hips in a clear display of impatience.

“I’ve figured out somethings, and I don’t think this is the right place for me. I’m going to quit the show,” Xi Zirui says with a shrug. “But the extra practice time will still be useful for him.”

Han Yu takes a single step towards him, “Gege, what-”

Liao Min steps in front of him and pokes Xi Zirui on the shoulder. “You can do whatever you want, once you’re out that door. For now, you’re my student and you’re going to dance.”

There’s genuine anger blazing in her eyes, and Xi Zirui curses himself inwardly. She was supposed to be the laid back mentor who didn’t really care.

In the end, his poor judgment leads him to having to rehearse the stupid choreography Liao Min teaches them.

They’re facing a wall filled with floor to ceiling mirrors, so that they can stand behind Liao Min and watch all her movements easily — except Xi Zirui has very poor coordination and keeps getting his directions confused, stumbling into Han Yu multiple times.

After the third time Liao Min snaps at him, “Don’t look at the mirrors if it’s confusing, look at me, copy what I do.”

But even when Xi Zirui isn’t getting his directions wrong, he’s struggling to keep up with the fast tempo of the song playing from Liao Min’s speakers. Han Yu is struggling too, but he’s doing a much better job of following along.

Eventually, they reach the section of the song in which their movements converge into an intimate dance.

“It’s a push and pull, you’re testing each other out,” Liao Min says, as she observes them repeating the sinuous rolls she just taught them.

Xi Zirui almost bites through his tongue the moment Han Yu’s hands wrap around his waist, and his chest meets his back

“Don’t flinch,” Liao Min says, correcting Xi Zirui’s posture with a flick on his arm. “You’re tentative, not afraid. He pulls you in, and you escape, but the goal is to make him chase you.”

There’s nothing to do but grin and bear it, so the next time Han Yu’s hands wrap around him, Xi Zirui shakes him off with a flourish of his arm, but leaves it behind long enough for Han Yu to reel him back in against his chest.

“Good,” Liao Min says, throwing her hands in the air. “We’re finally getting somewhere. Now again, from the top.”

“I need a break,” Xi Zirui says, stepping out of the cradle of Han Yu’s arms. “I have to go to the bathroom.”

Liao Min nods, and Xi Zirui almost runs out of the studio’s double doors. He passes the bathroom on the corridor on the left and keeps going, right out of the Academy.

He doesn’t return to Liao Min’s dance practice.