Queen Of Nothing - 18 Chapter 18

It had only been a few minutes when the knock rang at my door. I didn’t have to guess at who it was, I knew exactly who stood beyond the thin layer of wood and iron. He wished to apologize for our dispute. Wished to smooth over my wrinkles but I was determined to remain ruffled.

Who was he to tell me what to do with my body? How to feel and what to desire? There were times when I honestly thought that Drake Ramneal was created by the gods as punishment for acts I hadn’t remembered committing. He made me absolutely insane. Being around him was an ever constant flurry of emotion, from contentment, to joy, then to annoyance and anger. And lust.

They’re was something in the man’s amber eyes, in the curve of his cupid bow lips, that made me forget ever etiquette lesson I’d ever learned. Then he would speak and I’d go from being struck with need to blinded by anger.

I didn’t want to argue with him. In fact, I’d been doing a fine job of keeping control of my tongue over the last weeks but like all bliss born of turning the cheek, eventually I found that no matter where I looked, I saw something frustrating.

Now, it wasn’t as if I didn’t have feelings for the man. Or want him around. Nothing of the sort, it almost felt that the closer I got to him, the more he pissed me off. It was likely due to the fact that the more his feeling grew for me, the deeper is desire to protect me became. Even if he was protecting me from himself. The problem being, though I had a knight and a the palace was never short on guards, I never needed anyone’s protection before. They all, father included, recognized how strong and capable I was. When they’re was a problem, I handled it myself and only when I couldn’t did my guards step in, as rare as it was.

I was a mage. And a damn strong one. But the need to protect my brother and my people had shackled my magic as much as the rest of me. For as long as the threat of total war hung over me, I was trapped. Because while the capital had been raided and wrecked, the rest of Morea was untouched and everyone who had fled the city was safe beyond the walls. The farmers still farmed rich lands, the merchants still sold wears, the miners still dug for gems and metals, the fishers still found fish, the people still lived in relative peace and if being a bird in a cage kept that so, I would happily clip my own wings.

The knocking grew louder. “Arabella, please…”

There was a resignation to his voice that made me think he’d been calling to me the entire time I was lost in thought. Knowing Sir Ramneal, it was true. I groaned slightly throwing myself back on my pillows. “Enter.”

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There was a brief moment of absolute silence as if he couldn’t believe I’d actually granted him access before he entered, head hanging against his chest. “I’m sorry. I never meant to imply…”

“I know.” I said patting the mattress and he happily came to sit beside me. “This is… not easy for me, Drake.”

“I know.” He whispered as he pulled me into his side. “I only desire to help you. Protect you from all that would do you harm or steal the beautiful smile from your lips.”

I sighed, this man was incredible. And so very bad for me. “I am a capable woman, Sir Ramneal, able to care for myself.”

He rolled to his side, holding me in a way that granted his lips access to my own. He took them in a deep kiss that spoke of things we would never vocalize, or at least I wouldn’t. “I know. But when I see you hurt,” he said with a kiss to my lips, “or sad,” a kiss to my nose, “or with that little furrow in your brow that comes when you’re angry,” he said kissing me between my eyebrows, “then it is all I can do to stop myself from rushing to fix all your worries, shoulder all of burdens, take all of your hits.” He pressed a kiss to my forehead before returning to my lips. “I know you’re capable, love, in a pinch you’d probably even make me work for my victory, but that doesn’t stop me from wanting to do everything in my power to take care of you.”

I just blinked at him. How he could just say these things to me with earnest was lost to me. I couldn’t even be honest with myself, let alone him. Nor anyone else. What would be like, I couldn’t help but wonder, to speak my heart just once? What face would he make when I told him that I found myself loving him as much as he did me? What would he say? Would he speak at all or would his lips find mine in one of his life altering kisses that said more that any words could?

I wanted to know. But instead I threaded my fingers in his silky brown hair pulling his lips to mine. With bravery I hadn’t mustered in some time, I licked at his lips. When he opened his mouth I let my tongue find his, tangling with his with a passion that was both powerful and sensual all at once. Sir Ramneal had such a unique taste. A sweetness I couldn’t find anywhere else. Sweeter than honey and sugar without the bitterness of a refined chocolate. Something I wasn’t sure existed in any food. Something I could only taste on his lips.

He moaned, the sound knotting my stomach in a pleasantly painful pit of longing and need. I gave his shoulder a shove and he easily fell to his back. I must have been a woman possessed because I straddled him, leaning toward so that our kiss wouldn’t be broken. He batted my hair out of our faces with a soft laugh against my lips and then broke the kiss to look up into my eyes. He just stared at me with so much warmth and… hunger.

I needed to say something. If fact I couldn’t stop myself from it as the words formed without my permission. “Drake, I lo…”

But before I could finish speaking the door to my chambers was smashed opened. And while we still had the protection of my bedchamber door I shrieked, terrified, and Sir Ramneal moved as if his mind shut down and his instinct took over. In a matter of seconds he some how had us off the bed, on the far side from the door, me standing with my back against the wall and behind his back. He pulled my dagger from under my mattress and had it pointed at the door ready to defend me from whatever came through and all before I even realized that we were no longer tangled together upon the covers.

The door slammed open and there stood, to Sir Ramneal’s obvious surprise, a large group of Althean soldiers. “What is the meaning of this?!” Sir Ramneal demanded in a voice that did not belong to my sweet, loving Drake but the First Sword of Althea.

“The Princess is to come with us at once.”

My entire body stiffened. Their king had found an end to my usefulness and I was going to die. That was the only thought running through my mind. I was going to die and all before I had gotten the chance to avenge my father, my family, my people and free my brother. I was going to die before I got to feel all of Sir Ramne… Drake’s love.

“Why?” Drake demanded.

“King’s orders.” The one in front said. He clearly looked uncomfortable, like he didn’t like going around his commander but knew he had to listen to his king.

“Where to?”

“The arena.” He said looking at Sir Ramneal who still had his dagger raised.

“The princess is not dressed for the outdoors. Give us a moment.”

“His majesty…”

But his words were cut off with a sharp glare from Sir Ramneal. “A moment.”

With a nod the men backed out the door closing it behind them and Drake went into a panic. He shoved my dagger into his boot, grabbed a couple of potions and poultices off the dresser shoving those into his pockets and then threw open my armoire digging out a black velvet cloak with white fur trim that he tied around my shoulders. He grabbed a letter opener from my small desk and slid that carefully into my boot all while fear kept me rooted to the spot.

He grabbed my shoulders, looked me directly in the eye, before kissing me fast, hard, and deep. “No matter what comes, I will protect you with my life…”

“Drake…” I mumbled tears on my cheeks.

“I love you, Arabella. Maddeningly so.”

I sobbed. “I lo…”

“I know.” He cut me off with a firm kiss and then whisked me towards the door. “But I won’t let you say it out of fear.”