Sorcerer’s Handbook - Chapter 390: Why Not Me?

“So that’s the situation.”

Not long after dinner, everyone except the Con Artist was gathered in Ashe’s room. Annan seemed to have just finished her bath, wearing purple pajamas and eating pudding; Banjeet was still in his ever-present butler attire, as if he were working overtime; Lise had also finished her bath and was having Ashe blow-dry her hair.

“So you disturbed my skincare routine with Alice for this trivial matter?” Harvey complained.

Everyone stared blankly at the necromancer.

Banjeet pursed his lips.

Annan touched her earring.

Ashe frowned.

Only Lise couldn’t help but open her mouth, but as soon as she uttered a vowel, Ashe covered her mouth.

“First, I cleanse Alice’s body with a protein coagulating preservative solution, then I apply diluted Gallingen solution to maintain her skin elasticity, and then—”

“No one asked you about that! Interrupt! Heavy blow! Prevent rebound!” Ashe was so exasperated he felt like throwing the hairdryer at Harvey, and said crossly, “The topic now is Igor, not Alice!”

“What’s there to discuss about Igor?” Harvey scratched his ear nonchalantly. “Are you wondering what wedding gift to give? On that note, I’m quite confident. Two custom-made necromancer-exclusive couple coffins will outshine any of your mundane gifts.”

“As for Lise, she hopes Aunt Bukin will wear a wedding dress at the ceremony,” Lise said. “Just seeing that will make Lise happy, no other gifts needed.”

Banjeet reminded her, “Lise, the wedding gift is something we give them, not something they give us.”

Lise shook her head. “I don’t care, Lise just wants to see Aunt Bukin in a wedding dress! Just want to see it, just want to see it!”

“Lise!”

Ashe pressed down on the white-haired girl’s head and said sternly, “The adults are discussing serious matters. Don’t cause a ruckus! Do you think you can have everything you want?”

Annan nodded secretly, thinking that Ashe still knew how to prioritize.

Then she saw Ashe summon the Gospel Book and open it, revealing a catalog of items inside: “In my opinion, we should pool our funds and custom-order a wedding dress for Igor as the wedding gift—”

“So that’s the situation.”

Not long after dinner, everyone except the Con Artist was gathered in Ashe’s room. Annan seemed to have just finished her bath, wearing purple pajamas and eating pudding; Banjeet was still in his ever-present butler attire, as if he were working overtime; Lise had also finished her bath and was having Ashe blow-dry her hair.

“So you disturbed my skincare routine with Alice for this trivial matter?” Harvey complained.

Everyone stared blankly at the necromancer.

Banjeet pursed his lips.

Annan touched her earring.

Ashe frowned.

Only Lise couldn’t help but open her mouth, but as soon as she uttered a vowel, Ashe covered her mouth.

“First, I cleanse Alice’s body with a protein coagulating preservative solution, then I apply diluted Gallingen solution to maintain her skin elasticity, and then—”

“No one asked you about that! Interrupt! Heavy blow! Prevent rebound!” Ashe was so exasperated he felt like throwing the hairdryer at Harvey, and said crossly, “The topic now is Igor, not Alice!”

“What’s there to discuss about Igor?” Harvey scratched his ear nonchalantly. “Are you wondering what wedding gift to give? On that note, I’m quite confident. Two custom-made necromancer-exclusive couple coffins will outshine any of your mundane gifts.”

“As for Lise, she hopes Aunt Bukin will wear a wedding dress at the ceremony,” Lise said. “Just seeing that will make Lise happy, no other gifts needed.”

Banjeet reminded her, “Lise, the wedding gift is something we give them, not something they give us.”

Lise shook her head. “I don’t care, Lise just wants to see Aunt Bukin in a wedding dress! Just want to see it, just want to see it!”

“Lise!”

Ashe pressed down on the white-haired girl’s head and said sternly, “The adults are discussing serious matters. Don’t cause a ruckus! Do you think you can have everything you want?”

Annan nodded secretly, thinking that Ashe still knew how to prioritize.

Then she saw Ashe summon the Gospel Book and open it, revealing a catalog of items inside: “In my opinion, we should pool our funds and custom-order a wedding dress for Igor as the wedding gift—”

The Second Miss pulled off her earring, which transformed into an assault gun and aimed it at Ashe. “Are you out of your mind? Want to run away from home? Don’t be shy, the Funeral Firm’s main business is transportation.”

“Second Miss, let’s talk this out. You’re scaring Lise,” Ashe and Lise raised their hands in surrender.

“Let’s get back to the main topic.” Annan turned the assault gun back into an earring. “Do you think Igor will agree to this?”

“You should ask, what reason does he have to refuse this investment?” Harvey was playing with a skull he had pulled out from who knows where.

Ashe glanced at it, feeling an odd sense of natural harmony and unique beauty from the skull, much like the feeling of finding a perfectly straight stick that could be used as a long sword during his childhood walks.

He shuddered and quickly hugged the warm Lise, trying to resist the allure of the dead. “Maybe Igor is just extremely averse to intimacy…”

“But didn’t you mention that Mr. Bukin has the Bewitcher Lineage?” Banjeet asked. “Though there are no Bewitchers in the Gospel Kingdom, according to records, the Bewitcher Lineage shouldn’t be compatible with aversion to intimacy, right? However, Mr. Bukin might already have someone he’s interested in, perhaps…”

“So what if he has someone? Can’t people change their minds? Does a Con Artist have some kind of ‘loyalty’ mechanism that locks their affections forever? And if you’re making assumptions, why not assume Igor, like me, doesn’t like living people and prefers the cold touch of the dead?” Harvey retorted irritably. “Or maybe assume Igor doesn’t like money and just enjoys our adventurous, nomadic life. That would make more sense!”

“In other words,” Lise concluded, “As long as Aunt Bukin is a normal person, he will definitely agree to this deal.”

Everyone nodded, even Annan couldn’t argue.

Mainly because the conditions offered by Yvaren were too advantageous, the price bubble was almost inflated to an irrationally impulsive level—that was the entire Belldate consortium!

An Angel Family!

The sole ruler of Mephila!

And they controlled the profound legacy of the Dominance Sect!

Let’s think about it from Igor’s perspective. If he agrees to this deal, he can leap from being an outsider to becoming the son-in-law of the Belldate family, marry a rich and beautiful woman, become a CEO, and wield wealth that rivals nations, reaching the pinnacle of life.

For an ordinary person, they might consider whether they have the ability for all this, but Igor is a Con Artist. He might not have the skills to run the massive Belldate consortium, but he definitely knows how to turn Belldate’s resources into his own wealth. Embezzlement, bribery, and using power for personal gain are all within a Con Artist’s repertoire!

Thinking more maliciously, even though a Con Artist can never truly control Belldate, since only his and Anfel’s offspring would be the rightful heirs, what if something happened to Anfel after she had a child?

Furthermore, the current patriarch, Yvaren, is merely a two-wings sorcerer. The Belldate fortress might protect her, but if Igor becomes her “family,” a Con Artist would have countless ways to harm his sister-in-law.

As for whether Igor would do such a thing… don’t forget, the first time Ashe met Igor, he was nearly drained dry by this handsome blond Bewitcher!

And the most irresistible point: Yvaren would find a way to break Igor’s Pact with Annan!

As the inheritors of the Dominance Sect, Belldate has industrialized and specialized the use of Pacts. Yvaren’s promise can be trusted-after all, what if Annan controlled Igor through the Pact to steal Belldate’s wealth?

For her own interests, Yvaren wouldn’t let Igor remain under Dolan’s control. Igor had explicitly said he wouldn’t sign any Pacts with Belldate, so Yvaren’s offer is not only enticing but also comes with the convenience of having her sister feed it to Igor directly, making it seem like Igor is the one paying for such attentive service!

The more Ashe thought about how Belldate was going to such lengths to poach their companion, the angrier he got. He slapped his thigh in frustration and exclaimed, “Why not me?”

“Ah!” Lise also punched Ashe in the jaw in anger. “Dad, if you’re going to hit someone, hit yourself! Why hit my thigh?”

“But Ashe does have a point,” the young butler pondered.

Ashe nodded vigorously. “Right, right! Why do I have to mop the floors and clean up while Igor gets to sit in the garden and go on a date with a pretty, sweet, and innocent young lady? It’s not fair! Why does that shorty offer Igor such a great deal while all I get is Annan’s—”

He stopped abruptly, like he’d hit the brakes.

But it was too late—the girl in purple pajamas had already vanished from his sight.

In her place, he felt a hard object pressing against his lower back.

“The one pressing against your back now is my sister, whose mother is Donna, the Second Miss of the Absolute Blade Mech Company. Her specialty is massaging people with 9mm metal blocks. If I were you, I’d spit out the words you just swallowed. Tomorrow’s you will thank today’s you for making a wise decision.”

Annan had somehow moved behind Ashe and climbed onto the bed, making a very serious threat. However, everyone except Ashe could see her earring was still hanging properly on her ear, and she was just holding a metal spoon, pressing the handle against Ashe’s back.

Although Ashe didn’t know the threat was fake, he understood that resisting would only make things worse, and confessing would make things even worse. He clenched his teeth and resisted to the end.

“Spill it! What did Yvaren use to tempt you?”

“Your room key, but I’m an upright man, of course I refused such a heinous deal!”

“You’re lying! All the doors here use iris recognition, there are no keys! Spill it!”

“It was actually a hypnotic spray that works specifically on you, but I am a man of pure love, so of course I refused such shameless temptation!”

“If Yvaren could hypnotize sorcerers, she would have turned us into her dogs long ago! Wait a minute, you even mentioned the hypnotic spray, which means Yvaren’s offer was even lower than that. Just tell me honestly, and I won’t be mad at you. The real culprit here is Yvaren, not you.”

“Could you let go of me before you say that?”

Watching Annan lock Ashe in a cross chokehold while they wrestled on the bed, Lise and Banjeet had strange expressions on their faces—since when did those two get along so well? Meanwhile, Harvey continued fiddling with his precious skull.

Suddenly, Lise glanced at her new mirror gloves, then rushed over and pounced on Ashe, forcibly separating the two sweaty friends.

“Ouch~~~”

Annan quickly let go. “Did I hit Lise?”

Ashe hurriedly sat up to check. “Are you okay? Where did you get hit?”

‘Lise’ timidly raised her hand. “I think I twisted my wrist…”

“That’s a relief.” Ashe sighed, gently massaging her wrist and subtly slipping in the ‘Joy Sword.’ “This little injury will heal quickly.”

“Mmh!” ‘Lise’ nestled into Ashe’s embrace, nuzzling him like a small bear seeking warmth.

Given the situation, Annan couldn’t continue play-fighting with Ashe. But as she walked away, she noticed ‘Lise’ smirking slightly, her eyes glinting mischievously—a dark, cunning version of the white-haired girl. Yet, when Annan looked directly at her, ‘Lise’ was buried in Ashe’s arms, her face hidden.

A hallucination?

Or was Yvaren’s influence at play? Could there be a large-scale Miracle affecting their minds and causing hallucinations?

As Annan sat back down, still suspicious, Banjeet returned to the main topic. “If Miss Yvaren had made such an offer to Mr. Harvey or Ashe, I would have been surprised but could understand it. But her choice was Mr. Bukin, and that confuses me.”