Struggle Of Love - Chapter 38 Its James

A little time had passed with the both of us feeling awkward and a little bit shy.

“Alright, when we join high school, we can just tell people that you moved in with me or something.” He said looking me in the eye. Would we not have been just high schoolers? Who would believe us? But I asked a rather more important question.

“If it won’t be complicated, then we should. Though, I kind of fear mom and dad now,” I admitted. I really felt that I was in the wrong back then. They had helped me so much and would this not be asking them too much?

“They already know. I told you, remember?” He did not see the things as they were. Sure he mentioned that a couple times here and there. But years had passed since he spoke to them about me. Sure they adopted me. But, was that not just because I was his best friend. What would they think about me? I had felt that I was asking too much. James sure had not thought of all this as far as I did. It was understandable. I was undeniably, a sliver at least, more mature than he was. And also, than most of the boys and girls our age were. I believe it was because of facing life’s lessons rather early.

“Don’t worry. There’s nothing to worry.” He told me before we bought some ice-creams and returned home.

I knew I was obligated to tell them whatever has happened between the two of us. He was too, but he did not seem to care much.

Another week passed. I was still not prepared to face them. School was just the same. But, James did not let other girls flirt with him anymore. Not only that, he had also warned them not to go me for any sort of help regarding him. That had really helped me or I would feel so restless and might have ended up making enemies. I did not do very well with envy. I would either tell them that James and I already confessed to each other or I might have acted like a complete bitch with them. But thanks to him, I was not put a situation like that.

Finally, after another week had gone by, I decided I could not go on that way. If worst comes to worst, I might have to live separately for a while before everything would fall back into place and would be their daughter and his sister.

It was another Sunday and all of us had just finished dinner. I was going to let them know. I did not talk to James about it. I did not feel it was necessary.

“Mom,” I called her gently, I was frightened at heart.

“Yes dear?” She said turning from the sink where she was putting away the dishes. I walked into the kitchen slowly.

“I have an important thing to tell you and dad.” I told her.

“Well, I’ll be there, call your dad,” she said nodding at the seating in the living room. She sensed it was something very important.

Soon we were all there. James joined too, probably knowing he would be needed. I saw him smiling like a ghost but did not make any gestures to me.

“Well, tell us, sweetheart,” my dad asked. I took a long breath and started.

That moment I had realized that though I was preparing myself to tell them, I had not thought about how to tell them. How did I have to put everything in words?

“I like a boy,” I blurted, without knowing any better ways.

“Aw. . . Really? Young love!” Mom commented.

Dad gave her a look and turned to me, “You are too young, Jessica!” He said word by word slowly. He was serious.

You could say I went numb from their words. How am I supposed to say any further?

“You don’t scare her!” Mom scolded dad and she asked me, “Who do you like then?” She sang.

My mouth felt dry and all eyes were on me expectantly. It was like facing a grave danger, like walking on a rope over an endless valley. It could all be over any moment. Yet, balancing myself without moving was just not an option. Because, in a situation like that, moving forward will keep you on the rope than being still. Dare I call it an adventure, the hope was way lesser. The best thing to do was to leap forth to the other end. There was a slight throat ache when I swallowed before telling them, “It’s James.” I said in one breath.