Struggle Of Love - Chapter 47 Confrontation

I felt light shuffling beside me as woke up from my sleep. I did not move. If I alert him, he might just slip into the bed beside again and act like nothing is wrong. Let me wait for him until he gets ready and puts on his jogging suit.

I heard the sound of the bathroom door. Once he comes out, he will have to come clean about everything. My eyes started feeling heavy. It must be because of yesterday.

The door opened which a soft click. I saw him from the corner of my eye. He was ready. Just as he was heading for the door, I called out getting out of the bed.

“James!”

He turned around with his clear eyes opened wider. But, he did not say anything.

“Do you have something to say?”

“I just got to make a morning trip to meet a friend. He fell a little sick.” What’s wrong with him? Why is he speaking so much non sense? Since when does he think I buy whatever comes out of his mouth?

“He falls sick every day?” This time, my face was no longer composed? My eyes were narrowed and my gaze was sharper than ever before. Finally, this question seemed to have a small impact on him. How many more lies is he going to use to cover up whatever it is? His eyes slowly shifted away from me.

“What do you mean every day?” His tone was deeper than usual. He spoke to the floor across me.

“Look at me.” I said calmly. He shifted his head but still avoided my eyes. I walked up to him and put my eyes in his line of sight.

“Don’t you know what I mean ‘every day’?”

He took a quick step back. “Jessie, what’s wrong? Why are you like this?” What’s wrong?

An ear piercing sound rang through the room. I slapped hard across the face. Then I noticed that I started crying. Through my blurry eyes, I saw his eyes tearing up too. This was yet another unpleasant first. The first time I was forced to slap him.

“Enough of your lies!” I hugged him and cried onto his chest. He just stood doing nothing like he went numb. “James, say something.”

Seeing him unmoving like his soul left him, I was sad. “I’m sorry. I did not want to hit you. But you were treating me like a stupid person!”

He then hugged me back like he came back to this world after hearing my voice. “Don’t be sorry.” His voice was very low, but his struggle not to breakdown was clear to me. Then he started crying too.

It took us both a little time to calm ourselves down. “James?” He grunted out a response indicating that he heard me.

“Are you okay?” I asked him lifting my head to see his face. His chin rested on my head and I still did not have a proper look. I tried to move my head slowly in another attempt, but he held me tight, not letting me move. Was he still crying? Perhaps that was why he did not like me seeing him.

When we were kids and something troubled him, he used to find me to let it out. Crying was included sometimes. He did not hide his tears back then. Because, boys did not particularly cry in front of their girls, I questioned him how he saw this once. It was a playful teasing that I aimed at. But, he gave me a serious and truthful confession in return. Mentally I am the stronger one and he told me that crying in front of me never felt like he was lowering himself. That was his level of acceptance.

But everything he is doing now is in a stark controversy to my beliefs.

He spoke after calming himself more, “I’m not.”