Super Lazy System - Chapter 1 I Got Myself A Priest

“Welcome to the Super Lazy System, please choose a dream mode.” Said a lazy sounding robot voice. Along with the voice came an interface, with two visible options.

Dreamworld: Host will have godly powers, gaining experience points relevant to the growth of your world.

Roleplay: Host will be put in a random scenario, successful completion will award host with phenomenal rewards. Current scenario: 10,000 experience and level 1 mystery box.

Within this white void stood a young man, staring at the interface. The young man looked no more than 15-16, he had exceptional features as if carved by a god, on an exquisite piece of jade.

This young man’s name was Bai Yi, and currently, he, had a frown on his face a look that would break any young maiden heart.

‘Has it come to this. Must I the fabulously handsome Yi, torture myself just to avoid fathers punishment.’ A shallow sigh sounded, one filled with uncertainty. Suddenly a fierce look appeared on his face, one that called for blood! “TO WAR!!!” shouted Yi, with a voice that would put shivers done even a devil’s spine.

Thinking of the punishment that would await him, falling to do well in the clan gathering, put shivers down poor Yi spin. That inhuman punishment, that torment, th-that stuffing!, “I will never ever, go through the torment of cultivating again.”

“Dammit, dad why won’t you beat me like before?” Yi said with a wronged look on his face. That was the kind of person Bai Yi was he’d rather take a beating than being forced to cultivate, perhaps that was the reason his father stopped beating him in the first place.

With a fierce voice Yi, shouted to the system, “System you hear me you sadistic bastard, do it just get it over with enter roleplay mode!”

“Host entering role-playing mode, please stand by.” said a lazy sounding robot voice.

“Scenario created host must marry the into royalty. Available targets king, queen and princess, System wishes host username Mr handsome Yi luck.”

“The fuck”

“Since when did the system give out experience points like candy, haha with this one’s looks can this even be considered a challenge.” sounded an extremely arrogant voice. But he had a right to be arrogant, after all even if you looked through the reaches of time and space you’d be hard-pressed to find one more handsome than him.

While he, was gloating about he’s supreme looks, a lazy sounding robotic voice sounded again.

“Congratulations to host for unlocking ‘super lazy role play’ host now has the capability to send in an AI, to complete the scenario.”

Bai Yi, face froze with a shocked expression on his face, his mouth almost hitting the white void beneath his feet.

“Holy hell! Since when was this an option, if I had this I would have already become unrivalled. Bai clan gathering, heh with this what is there to fear from something so insignificant.” A look of disdain appeared on Bai Yi face.

“User Mr handsome Yi, unlocked ‘super lazy role play’ when he achieved core formation.”

Black lines appeared on Bai Yi face, he couldn’t remember the last time he was this angry. “Yo-you why didn’t you tell me about this before!”

“Host has not entered ‘role play mode’ since host was in the mortal realm. The system is not required to inform user, before entering the interface.”

“Dammit system, I’m already at the revolving core stage, If I knew about this before I could of long since entered core compression stage.”

Bai Yi, had long since entered revolving core stage, in fact, he was even in the great circle of revolving core.

Core formation was the second stage in the path of cultivation, with the revolving core stage being the tried.

“host can choose to pay 1000 experience points a day to be informed of all future updates. User should take this special offer while still available.” That normally lazy sounding voice almost sounded energetic, but if one listened closely enough, they could tell it was still pretty lazy .

“Special offer my ass, why don’t you just rob me. Hmph! Don’t try playing games with this young lord, not only am I exceptionally handsome, I even have the mind of a scholar.” A scholarly aura was appearing around Bai Yi, If one didn’t know him, they would most certainly believe him to be a young scholar, one that just passed the imperial exam.

But of course, sweet Bai Yi was as dumb as a doornail. He was truly all looks and no brain.

Soon Bai Yi, found himself in a white void, with a simple chair, a table with a wine glass and a humongous monitor facing the chair and table.

Bai Yi, was extremely familiar with this room, it would appear whenever he entered ‘Dreamworld’. This was the first time it appeared when young Yi, entered role play mode.

“Haha, now no one can stop me! My cultivation speed will put father to shame. Hmph! Make me cultivate, I only worry father will have to spend more time in secluded meditation, just to keep his face. Haha” Bai Yi, laughed out loud as if he was going mad.

While Bai Yi, was gloating the system rudely interrupted him, with its lazy mechanical voice. “Host must choose a target for current scenario”

“System pick it yourself, let me just sit here enjoying my wine.” Bai Yi said in a lazy tone.”

“System does not currently have that function, user must select a target. King will offer user 100,000 exp, ‘Ai not available for this target’, the queen will offer 20,000 exp and princess will offer standard exp for the current stage.”

“Hmpth, does the system think I’m a fool, what kind of idiot would choose the king. Far too much effort I’d rather just sit here enjoying my wine.”

“System I pick the ‘queen’ with my looks the Ai will be unstoppable.” Bai Yi said while taking a sip of wine.

“Entering role-playing mode. Role confirmed, host will play a servant boy, delivering food to the queen. System wishes user best of luck”

Almost immediately after the voice faded, the monitor started showing an image of a young man, in front of a door. The young man had exquisite features, that would put gods to shame and currently, this young man was holding a silver tray.

Suddenly a prompt appeared on the monitor, with two available options.

Bash down the door and deliver the meal to the queen.

Or

Politely knock on the door and wait for the Queen to invite you in.

“Huh, what’s this don’t tell me I have to tell it what to do? ” asked Bai Yi, with a questioning tone.

Surprisingly that lazy mechanical voice didn’t appear, perhaps it didn’t believe it had to dignify such an obvious question.

“Mmm, no reply huh, well aren’t we cocky today. No matter ‘politely knock’.”

Within the monitor a sudden knock could be heard, Knock-knock “My queen I’ve come with refreshments, may I enter.”

Soon a lovely voice sounded, “Come in”

The Ai slowly opened the door, soon a beautiful middle-aged women came to view. She had a supple, queenly figure, with lush shining golden hair and blue coloured eyes that just shouted elegance.

Her red supple lips slowly opened “My what a gorgeous young man, since when did someone like you work here?” She said in a questioning tone.

Out of know where a new prompt appeared on the screen one that almost made Bai Yi, cough up a month-full of blood.

Enter woo mode, for a slow and peaceful experience.

Knock her out and figure your next steps after.

“Fuck what’s wrong with this system, does it really think I’m that kind of person! Hmpth, slow and steady, my ass who do you think I your father am? Knock the bitch out!”

A frown appeared on that queenly figure “What are you doing. Stop stay back, guards!” Bang!, the Ai delivered a chop directly on the queen’s neck, knocking her out immediately.

Before her body even hit the ground a new prompt appeared.

Go find a priest to validate the marriage

Or

Use you cultivation to escape the castle, along with the queen on your back. Massacring any mortal who stands in your way!

A crazed laughter appeared shortly after the prompt “Haha, trying to get one over me huh. System, I’ll let you know I have the mind of a scholar, I’ll just validate my own wedding.”

The Ai paused clearly confused, did this idiot think he was a priest or something?

“Option unavailable the presence of a priest is required.”The cold mechanical voice sounded, crashing any hope poor Yi, had.

Sigh “fine, fine just get me a priest” after heavily sighing one last time Bai Yi, closed his eyes occasionally taking sips from his wine glass.

After an unknown amount of time, the Ai returned with blood stains all over him. Hanging in his arms was a frightened priest in white robes, few blood stains could be seen on his body.

God only knows what happened to the poor man Bai Yi, certainly didn’t have the patience to ask.

Bai Yi, opened his eyes staring at the man with utmost glee “Good, get the marriage going!.” Said Bai Yi.

The priest didn’t dare delay, quickly opening his bible ” We are joined here today”

The priest was rudely interrupted, by an extremely impatient voice.”Stop just quickly get to kiss the bride part.”

The priest was dissatisfied, but under the circumstances, he bit his lip and continued. ” I now pronounce you husband and wife, you may kiss the bride.”

“Mission success, Mr handsome Yi, is rewarded with 20,000 exp and 2 mystery boxes. Scenario ending user may exit the system”

“Wait, system, I want that priest, who knows when I’ll need on again.” Said a nervous Bai Yi, If he had to wait for another priest next time, he would feel like crying.

“Congratulations host, has acquired a priest treat him well.”

“Haha, I your father Bai Yi, am truly an educated man. Thinking ahead to the future and getting myself a priest.”