The Aphrodisiac-carrying Man - Chapter 3.2

Translator: Vemmy No editing or proofreading, quality is not a.s.sured >_< corrections/suggestions=”” are=”” greatly=”” welcome=”” i=”” translate=”” pretty=”” slowly=”” but=”” if=”” i=”” could=”” paraphrase..anyways,=”” i=”” a.s.sure=”” you=”” that=”” i=”” will=”” keep=”” it=”” as=”” a=”” translation=”” as=”” close=”” to=”” the=”” original=”” as=”” possible=”” and=”” not.paraphrase=”” ^^;=”” i=”” apologize=”” for=”” not=”” being=”” too=”” consistent=”” with=”” the=”” formatting,=”” colours,=”” footnotes,=”” and=”” stuff,=”” please=”” do=”” tell=”” me=”” if=”” it=”” bothers=”” you.=””>

Although Ke Le likes Ling Mao Er’s confidence, sometimes that confidence gives people headaches.

Your image isn’t as good as theirs and those cats all have different redeeming qualities, each has its own merits. Also, you only let me take photos but it’s not like I’m a professional photographer, I can only capture a hundredth of your beauty, so you couldn’t win against those other cats I guess.”

Ke Le desperately pinned the blame on himself, finally managing to coax Ling Mao Er to calm down.

“Didn’t I tell you to go learn photography?”

“But my artistic talent isn’t enough ah, the use of light and shadow and stuff, I really don’t understand.”

Ling Mao Er already knew that his expectations for this guy[1] were too high, “Continue submitting them this month.”

“..Oh” Ke Le mustered up a strong front and accepted (his fate LOL), “You still want me to take the pictures? How about we also hire a professional animal photographer? We’ll have a greater chance of getting first place this way.”

A person’s image flashed through Ling Mao Er’s mind.

“Let me consider it some more then.” He halfheartedly answered.

The advertis.e.m.e.nt company they were meeting today was for a rising internet startup, so Ling Mao Er chose a very fas.h.i.+onable youthful look, arriving right on time at the other’s company.

“Our company’s product is a new anonymous messaging app, the selling point is that the profile of each user can be fabricated. You won’t know if the person messaging you is male or female, human or.”

“Cat.” Ling Mao Er finished.

The advertising agency’s agent gave him a weird look, “Of course, cats are alright too. Usually, people within our circle prefer to say dog.”

What a tasteless circle, Ling Mao Er silently judged.

“So, the mode that we decided on for this advertis.e.m.e.nt is a short film using still image photography. Basically, a set of photos with a plot will be taken. The text was added on afterward, then connected together to tell a short story. This is more interesting than just plain advertising and is also more convenient for spreading on the internet.”

Ling Mao Er: “Oh[2].

“The short film’s story is as such: a shy, simple man disguises himself as a gorgeous, s.e.xy woman online”

“Kind of deceiving other people’s feelings though.” Ling Mao Er cut in again.

“No, it’s emphasizing the communication of thoughts, we encourage users to express themselves. If this male lead’s heart originally desired to experience another, completely different kind of life, then we can provide him a platform where he can fully be himself. Also, every user in the platform is aware that the other’s ident.i.ty is not necessarily their true one, naturally, they would not seriously invest feelings.”

Ling Mao Er: ” Oh.”

Let us continue, where were we again?”

“A shy, simple man disguises himself as a gorgeous, s.e.xy woman online.”

“Oh right, he pretends to be a woman. His original purpose was to get to know other people but eventually fell in love with the image of himself he created.”

Ling Mao Er waited for a while, “That’s all?”

“That’s all, it’s just a short still image film, the plot is very simple and depends strongly upon the model’s interpretation and performance.”

Ke Le continued, “I understand, the plot is about someone who fell in love with themselves, simply put, narcissism. This plot is very suitable for Mao Er, Mao Er is the most narcissistic.”

Ling Mao Er glared at him.

“We selected Ling Mao Er because the advert includes both male and female costume. For the cross-dressing to not be out of place, in the modeling circle, probably only Mao Er is suitable.”

With this explanation, Ke Le felt that this script was practically designed for Ling Mao Er.

“May I ask if the photographer has been decided?”

“The photographer is a friend of our boss, a pretty famous photographer. If it wasn’t for his relations.h.i.+p with our boss, it would be very difficult for him to fit us into his schedule.”

“Oh? Which one?

“It’s Teacher Mu, Mu Mu. He had once received a golden award for international photography, as well as various awards in various countries. He is also the specially commissioned photographer for the famous magazine Minus”

Ke Le was unable to restrain his surprise, ” Wah, isn’t this too much of a coincidence?”

“You guys are acquainted?”

“We had just collaborated with Teacher Mu yesterday. Teacher Mu also happens to be Mao Er’s neighbour, we live very close to each other.”

“Really? That really is such a coincidence. You guys have experience collaborating, your tacit understanding will probably be better than that of normal models and photographers.”

Ling Mao Er raised his eyebrow, also feeling that it was unexpected.

“The general contents are as such, we will arrange the schedule with Mao Er’s manager as soon as possible.”

“Ok, no problem,” Ke Le and Ling Mao Er stood up in succession, “may we have a pleasant cooperation.”

“I hope we have a pleasant cooperation.” The advertising agent shook hands with Ling Mao Er.

Ke Le secretly poked Ling Mao Er, reminding him to properly respond.

“I look forward to it.”

Having accepted a pretty decent contract, Ke Le was radiant with delight even while driving.

“To be honest, I also really want to see your male dress and female dress appear on the same screen. The result must be like seeing twins of mixed s.e.x[3], no, twins of mixed-s.e.x are fraternal[4], yours would be identical twins of different s.e.xes[5].”

Ling Mao Er gave a lukewarm “Humph” in response.

“Mao Er, aren’t you happy?” Ke Le sized him up through the rearview mirror.

“I’m only thinking.”

“Thinking what?”

“In the morning, what magazine did the advertising agency say that Mu Mu was a photographer for?”

” Minus.”

“Where are we headed to right now for the interview?”

“Minus.”

As the realization slowly dawned on Ke Le, he finally reacted, “It couldn’t be coincidental enough that we’ll see Teacher Mu right?” (T/n: They are meant to be!)

He gasped in surprise, “This kind of fate, Teacher Mu could practically be your personal photographer!” (T/n: the term he used actually meant “For use by the emperor/royalty” since Mao Er is a royal kitty)

Ling Mao Er rolled his eyes.

“How about we invite Teacher Mu to photograph for you (cat form)? Although his reimburs.e.m.e.nt is really expensive, not sure if we can afford it ah.” Ke Le couldn’t help but think out loud.

Ling Mao Er gave another cryptic “Hmph”.

“Maybe we can use the status of neighbours. Let’s buy some presents and visit him sometime, just, what does Teacher Mu like?”

“Hanging orchids maybe.”

Ke Le stared at him blankly, “Teacher Mu likes hanging orchids? How did you know? Also, who gives bonsai when visiting?”

“I’m just guessing, its not like I actually want to go.”

“You have to consider properly. If Teacher Mu agrees to help you take photos, let’s not even talk about the monthly cover, you might even be on the annual print’s cover. If you two giants work together, what Ragdoll ah, Himalayan ah, all of them would not be able to rival you.”

Ling Mao Er thought about the animal photos hanging on the walls of Mu Mu’s living room, he also felt that this made sense.

Kitty Magazine’s annual coverWhat to do, a little convinced

“Isn’t what I’m saying correct?”

Ling Mao Er, “Hmph, talk about it later.”

The arranged interview location didn’t have even Mu Mu’s shadow, there was only a little reporter whose eyes glowed when he saw Ling Mao Er.

In the fas.h.i.+on circle, Ling Mao Er’s public persona of a mixed-blood growing up in Thailand, coming to China to develop and speaking fluent Chinese was actually very popular, along with the appearance that was well-liked by youths, he very quickly became a fas.h.i.+on circle’s favourite. Both large and small magazines competed to publish his interviews, the little reporter worked very hard to win this opportunity.

“Teacher Mao Er, I’m your fan and I’m honoured to be able to interview you.”

Ling Mao Er is always relatively amiable towards his admirers. After getting his autograph and taking a photo together, the little reporter was extremely touched. Ling Mao Er was well known for being haughty within the circle after all.

“Could we begin the interview?” Ling Mao Er feared that the little reporter would rush out and disappear off somewhere in his excitement.

“Of course, of course, umm, my first question”

Most of Ling Mao Er’s information was fake, Ke Le had threatened him with death and forced Ling Mao Er to completely memorize the made up material long ago, dealing with this degree of interview was of no difficulty.

“So Teacher Mao Er, do you prefer cats or dogs?”

Ling Mao Er didn’t expect the other to ask this kind of question.

“Cats, I like cats more, dogs”

The Ke Le who was listening on the side wiped his sweat, afraid that Mao Er would say something that would incite the anger of the ma.s.ses, like “dirty and stupid, with the tongue hanging out, how disgusting” or something. He had couldn’t count how many times he’s heard similar complaints in private.

“I was bitten by a dog as a child, am a bit afraid of dogs.”

Ke Le could finally relax.

“Oh, so it’s like that. We are planning to publish a special edition, one of the themes is cat-type men VS dog-type men and are looking for twelve popular models to represent an animal. Apart from the interview drafts this time, we also want to take a set of photos of the model with animals. Has Teacher Mao Er’s manager mentioned this to you?”

Apparently, it has been mentioned but Ling Mao Er has forgotten.

Ling Mao Er, “He has mentioned it before.”

“Since Teacher Mao Er doesn’t like to interact with dogs, I will advise the editor-in-chief to divide Teacher Mao Er into the cat group.” The little reporter added, “I also feel that Teacher Mao Er’s temperament is closer to that of a cat, even your name has cat in it, you could be considered the representative of cat- type men.”

Ke Le imagined a dog-type Ling Mao ErImpossible to visualize.

Ling Mao Er, “Okay.”

“In that case, our magazine’s photographer will contact you and if it’s convenient, you can find a time to discuss the details.”

“Is choosing a photographer possible?” Ling Mao Er asked.

“Ah?”

“If it is possible, I would like to work with Teacher Mu.”

Hearing this, even Ke Le was surprised. When did Ling Mao Er change his personality? He only had photographers he refused to work with, was the appeal of the annual cover really so great?

“Teacher Mu? This,” The little reporter felt a bit awkward, “Teacher Mu is our magazine’s specially commissioned photographers, he has the authority the choose models, models cannot choose him”

Ke Le’s brain froze[6], gonna die gonna die gonna die gonna die

The first time that Ling Mao Er made this kind of request, he was rejected. His face very obviously darkened.

The little reporter was extremely nervous, “However, I can bring it up with the editor-in-chief, we can discuss it with Teacher Mu. Of course, whether or not he accepts would depend on his thoughtsthere’s also his schedule.”

Ling Mao Er became aloof, “Never mind then, there’s no need to go through the trouble.”

He stood up, “Is there anything else?”

“I, I’ll give the editor-in-chief a call first.”

“Any photographer is good, to me, there isn’t much of a difference. Once the magazine has decided, just contact my a.s.sistant directly.”

Ke Le awkwardly raised his hand, “It’s me.”

“That’s all, bye.”

The little reporter’s brows were beaded with sweat as he watched Ling Mao Er leave, his mind also froze[5]: Oh no oh no oh no oh no

[1] (ji hu) its casual language, like “this dude” or “this guy”. I just thought it was a fun phrase.

[2] (, ) – a sound of vague affirmation, doubt, or realization depending on the tone its spoken in. An all-powerful vague sound on par with “mhm”, “oh”, etc. Multiple p.r.o.nunciations, use it however you wish. I’m pretty sure Ling Mao Er is a bit doubtful.

[3] (lng fng ti) – fraternal twins of different s.e.x, one male one female.

[4] (y lun shung bo ti) – fraternal twins, developed from different eggs

[5] (tng lun) – from the same egg. He says , so male and female twins that are identical. Tis a very very rare case where, during cell division, only the X chromosome was duplicated.

[6] (po m dng) – I’m not actually sure what this is but I think it’s the no signal screen from when your TV stops working, like waaaay back in the day.

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