The Color of the Sky I saw that Day was also Blue - Chapter 10
Chapter 10:
The next morning. Waking up hours earlier than usual, Osakabe stood in front of the mirror for the first time since he had started his vacation staying at the guest house.
He brushed his hair, which hung down, curling inwards slightly. While adjusting his eyebrows, it occurred to him, his face really did carry an air of unhappiness. And also, for some reason, it resembled Shirakisawa Honoka’s.
In her case, her facial features were flat and light. Her pale eyes, despite the single fold of her eyelids, were well-shaped, the same as her pale lips. Her misfortune was felt in the sweetness and transience that came from those features.
In his case, the dull eyes where the light of hope did not shine. One could feel from his hollow expression a literal lack of happiness.
They may have resembled each other, but they were not in the least similar.
The two of them were completely different. Once he arrived at that fact, he smiled in resignation.
He put on a long, white t-shirt and navy tapered, ankle-length pants. Over that, he wore a casual, beige button-up, and he slipped into his bag the final letter he had received from Takasaki Minako.
It may have been cynical of him, but he decided that whatever the result today—good, or most likely bad—he would open the letter.
He reflected on his memories of the time he spent with Minako.
The memories of those days were, without a doubt, the ones that shone the brightest in his twenty-five years of life.
What would he say to Minako, if he could meet her today after ten years? To tell the truth, he had no idea. Even if he were to confess his feelings after all this time, she would most likely be taken aback.
In that case, then how about thank you? Thank you for all the wonderful memories. On the surface, it felt like a beautiful message. However, was it something he had the right to say after cutting off contact with her?
The more he thought about it, the more his thoughts kept looping back.
6:50, the clock read when he glanced at it. He checked himself in the mirror one more time, and closed the door to his room. He walked through the wooden hallway, the stairs creaking under his feet as he descended, and when he arrived at the entrance to the guest house, Honoka already sat there waiting in her shoes.
Observing his appearance, she looked up and smiled. “Good morning, Osakabe-san. You clean up nice.”
“Well, at least for today I thought I’d pick out the best clothes from what I brought with me.”
“I’m not just talking about your clothes—it’s your face too. Kidding! Now, let’s go. Ganbappeshi—you can do it!”
She spoke as cheerfully as possible. Today, her outfit was a floral-print dress over a white shirt. She stood enthusiastically while adjusting the heel of her low pumps.
He intentionally tried to appear cheerful, as if he was not brooding over his anxieties. No, he really was cheerful. From deep in his heart, Osakabe expressed his gratitude to Honoka, and at the same time, felt a warmth in the corner of his eyes.
Jolted along by the bus, they arrived at Miyako Station where he signed a contract to borrow a rental car until the next day. By the time they set out, it was already past eight.
Although it was only rural Iwate, the morning traffic was still fairly congested. The roads were jammed with cars on their way to work, and the sidewalks packed with university students overflowing from the station. There must have been some remedial classes today, or maybe regular classes had already started back up.
When they stopped at a red light, the gazes of several high school students crossing the street seemed to fall upon them, making him uncomfortable. How must I look in their eyes? Teens, brimming with hope, and then me, a nobody with no future. Feeling the gap between him and everyone else, Osakabe grew a little discouraged.
Judging by the traffic, they likely wouldn’t arrive in two hours. Realizing that, he turned on the car radio, hoping to distract from the silence. Once again, they were reporting on the bus accident, and so he hurried to change the channel to some random music.
“What do you plan to say when you meet her?” Honoka steeled herself to ask, with her gaze fixed on the crowds in the crosswalks.
Her voice was as quiet as possible. Likely, she had been waiting for the right timing to bring up this question. Yet, even at this late stage, Osakabe still had yet to settle on exactly what he wanted to tell Minako. Well, what should he say?
After worrying about it all over again, he finally admitted honestly, “I don’t know. As a matter of fact, I think that I still have some kind of feelings towards her. I’m sure she’s already put it all behind her. I vaguely understand that. Yet—I don’t have as much time as I thought. Even telling you this now, I don’t think you’ll understand, but… I have to face this now. This one regret from my past. That’s how I feel.”
At that, she let out a sigh. “I think I get it. But, I don’t think you should be so pessimistic. No matter what happens, let’s go back with smiles on our faces, okay?”
While laughing loudly, she made a fist and told him “Ganbappeshi!” one more time.
No doubt. She was intentionally speaking in a loud voice. He recognized that attitude.
Gradually, they left the city and the surrounding areas grew more rural. While glancing in turns, first at the scenery, passing by in a flash from the car windows, then Honoka’s languid profile, he thought to himself.
Yet again this nineteen-year-old girl is rooting for me. While thinking how pathetic he was, he also felt deeply apologetic for dragging her along.
I wish I could have met you a little sooner.
If only you could have been my classmate.
If only you could have been my girlfriend.
I wonder if my shitty life would have shined a little brighter?
Osakabe kept thinking about that ridiculous fantasy for the rest of the ride.