The Cursed Tyrant and His Reluctant Queen - Chapter 186

Ignis visits me in the evening. Today really is an important date, then.

«Can I sleep here, Veronica?»

«Sure,» I say. «I haven’t fed Lars yet. Do you want to help me?»

I accept the baby from Bea and nod so that she leaves us alone.

«I’ll keep the magic under control, I promise.»

«We’re at war,» Ignis says. «I tried stopping it, but it won’t work.»

«I see… What will happen now?»

«You’re so calm.»

«How could I not be? I’m next to you, the safest place in the world.»

«If you talk like this, I might believe you.»

«Oh, Ignis… You should believe me: I’m your wife.»

«I love you, Veronica. Even if I haven’t been here to prove it, all I do is for you and our son. I wanted to tell you…»

What a sudden change. It’s suspicious.

«Are you leaving for war?»

«Not yet. Ventis hasn’t moved the troops yet.»

«Wait, so… If you’re not leaving, why are you telling me all of this? It’s weird, Ignis.»

«I don’t know what tomorrow will bring. I couldn’t let you believe I didn’t care when I was just so scared about everything. But if something happens and I’m not able to tell you my heart, that would be too painful. It’s better if you know. I love you so much, but I’m so weak.»

«You’re not weak, my King,» I say. «You’re one of the strongest people I know! You have a good heart and are smart. If you are weak, then what about me?»

«You have your powers, and you’re also so quick to adapt to anything, Veronica. I hope our son takes after you.»

I sit on the bed, the bundle of white clothes waking up in my arms. The magic is locked now, so I can bend over and kiss Ignis’s cheek before sitting in bed. Lars is hungry and he starts crying soon enough.

Only when he bites my nipple, do I realise he’s also angry. Is it because I’m stopping him from using energy? Does he want to fry his father so much?

«Hey, you little thing! Don’t you dare do that to my husband!» I protest.

I settle against the pillows and wait for him to be done. It’s one of those days, today. Lars will eat a lot and won’t fall asleep until he’s exhausted.

«You can’t play with him, Lars. Be a good boy, all right?»

Seeing us exchange words… I mean, seeing me talk to our baby, Ignis smiles. It’s the first true smile I’ve seen in a long while.

«He’s growing up,» I say. «And he’ll be stubborn like his daddy! Look! He won’t sleep. I can guarantee he’ll make us stay awake for hours.»

«Don’t worry. I can take care of that.»

«Would you? For real?»

«If it’s not too challenging, I can play with Lars a little.»

«Oh, that would be awesome,» I say. «I can rest assured, then. My feet hurt today, even though I didn’t do anything much. I didn’t even take a stroll.»

«You waited for your family. I bet you walked in the room for the whole time.»

«I was a little nervous, and I could sense them as they got closer.»

«Oh, wait… But then, the Church…»

«No, they can’t feel my mother. She’s good at hiding. Not like me, I guess…»

«You also are good at that,» he says, maybe trying to comfort me. «It’s just that the circumstances were… different.»

«Circumstances? So, you do realise I didn’t do it on purpose now?»

«I’m sorry for that, Ronnie.»

«For what?»

«For telling you that you didn’t want me around. It was mean, and I didn’t think like that. I was so scared that you would choose that man over me…»

«Oh, Ignis, I wouldn’t ever! And not just that man, but any man in the world.»

«I know. I mean, I say that to myself so often. But knowing it and believing it’s enough isn’t the same.»

He’s as defenceless as a few days ago but, this time, something is different. He came to me tonight. It was not a weird plan of mine to get my hands on him.

It’s an improvement, isn’t it? It means that what we say now will weigh on us tomorrow too.

«We are parents now,» I say. I cuddle Lars a little while he closes his eyes. «We should learn how to make peace, Ignis.»

«We didn’t fight.»

«I know, but… I don’t know what happened, but I don’t like it. I’m willing to come to pacts, Ignis, as long as you accept to treat me as your wife again.»

«No.»

«No?»

«You don’t need to come to pacts with anything, Ronnie. It was my fault, and I have to overcome it.»

«But I can help you,» I point out. «Whatever you need, be it talking or just a night of peace.»

«I know,» he sighs. «I know you want to help me, but I’m not sure how to solve it. I’m afraid of myself, and I’m afraid you will be hurt by my weak self. That I won’t be able to protect you from the world and from the Palace.»

He sits on the bed, stretching his arms to pick up Lars.

I deliver the baby, paying attention to keep the energy down. It’s one of those rare moments when Ignis is willing to carry our son: I can’t waste it!

He smiles while walking with Lars in his arms, offering his finger for him to catch. They’re cute together, so much that I wish to have other babies in the future. Possibly, without all this magic and all this drama. Next time, I’ll pay extra attention to Ignis.

He was so careful with me, yet I overlooked his worries.

«Will you leave for the war?» I ask him again.

«Not yet,» is his only reply.

Not yet means yes. But we still have time. I should make it possible for him to see Lars more often, to play with him and exchange grimaces… Ignis needs to know who is waiting for him here when he leaves.

«I will become a good Queen,» I say. «I will learn how to do all the boring stuff, and I’ll become quicker with decisions. I’ll train so hard that you’ll see the results before going. You can rest assured that I will keep the Palace and the capital safe and in order for you!»

«You don’t need to…»

«I know, Ignis. But I want to! I want to help Alba as much as you do, even though it is my way. You will risk your life for your country. The least I can do is learn some bureaucracy.»

«It’s boring.»

«So what? It’s not like I have tons of interesting things to do. Tea parties are also boring, but I attend them.»

«Oh, Ronnie,» he chuckles, leaving Lars in the cradle.

He stands there for a few minutes, supposedly waiting for our son to fall asleep. Then, he tunes the lanterns to the lowest level, so that we can rest but also see if we need to wake up, and he lies next to me.

«If Lars starts crying, we need to reach him,» he explains.

I nod, not really concerned. We could just call for someone, but it’s nice to see my husband worrying.

«It feels as if you’re back after a lot of time spent apart,» I murmur, hugging him to sleep. Since he doesn’t push me away, I cuddle by his side.

«I’m sorry.»

«You don’t need to apologise. You have a lot going on, Ignis. I was so worried about you, that’s it!»

«I overlooked my family. That should have never happened. I was so worried about everything: our son, the war, the Church. Now, nothing else can go wrong, right? The Church knows about you, our son will constantly be in danger and wanted by different factions, and the war broke out. Now I can relax.»

«It sounds weird when you say it like that. But you’re right. Now, you don’t need to work hard to prevent a catastrophe. Not anymore. Just do your best like always, and we will be good.»

«My best wasn’t enough till now.»

«It was an impossible situation. I’m sure that you’ll do better with the war. After all, you already are a hero.»

«Oh, don’t start with that. One of the errand boys told me about a stupid song. It seems the commoners like it. It’s about how I was tempted by a wicked girl but stayed loyal to my Queen!»

«Loyal?» I murmur, closing my eyes. «Tell me more about that song.»

«It praises you a lot, so I guess it’s not completely unrelated to your activities.»

«I didn’t ask anyone to praise me,» I point out, opening my eyes again.

Damn it, were they this obvious?

«I’m joking,» Ignis says, bowing down to peck my forehead in between a chuckle and the other. It’s the first kiss in a while.

I missed him.