The Decade of Deep Love (Deep Love For You) - chapter 84
I graduated from college ten years ago and went to the interview. The first company I signed was the one that Jiang Wenxu did. At that time, the scale of the company was far less than it is now, and Jiang Wenxu is not what it is now.
At that time, I often saw He Zhishu, a very careful and gentle person, never getting angry, dealing with things perfectly fine and dripping. He did a very good job of doing things, and he always had to work hard to help Jiang Wenxu to clean up a pile of bad debts.
One time I accidentally saw the two kissing in the tea room that covered the door, I realized that they were actually a homosexual. There is nothing unacceptable, they are very good, the gas field is inexplicable, and it doesn’t make people feel awkward. They are really good to each other, and sometimes I am envious of what I see. It is admirable to be able to walk together to such a degree, whether it is the same **** or the opposite sex.
I can see that Jiang Wenxu loves He Zhishu, his eyes can’t deceive people, and he hasn’t tried to cover up. Every time his eyes fall on He Zhishu, he is warm and affectionate. Jiang Wenxu’s temper is very dry. Every time he initiates a fire, I have to go to He Zhishu for a while to avoid it. Slowly, Jiang Wenxu did not get angry with me. I was still able to make a joke with him. I asked, “General Chiang, how did you learn?”
Jiang Wenxu said: “I am afraid that you will be alone with He Zhishu for a long time.”
I really thought that Jiang Wenxu was so cute, jealous can be so interesting, like a loyal dog guarding bones. To tell the truth, at that time, I think that Jiang Wenxu’s change to He Zhishu is absolutely impossible. If I kill, I don’t believe that Jiang Wenxu will become the next look.
The company is getting better and better, the state has more support policies, and has signed many big orders. The city center has bought a whole new office building and recruited many new people. But I also suddenly found out that He Zhishu has not come to the company for a long time.
I really don’t know what happened. I asked Jiang Wenxu a few times before I slowly became clear about myself – He Zhishu was left at home. Jiang Wenxu’s meaning is probably that he is too tired to work outside. I only feel scared. A big man is guarding his home and waiting for another man to come back. what is this? Isn’t it a bad practice to ruin people? Moreover, how can He Zhishu be happy, his representative speech at the time of bidding is so beautiful, and he is so confident when he wears a suit to talk about the contract, so he throws himself at home and it is obviously harmful to him!
Jiang Wenxu is more and more dissatisfied. He can still pretend to be a democratic and embarrassing appearance when He Zhishu is there, but now he has completely exposed his iron fist and unquestionable strength. This is nothing, no matter what kind of acting style, it is enough to bring a good company. However, our relationship is still alienated. I used to be able to talk and laugh half-time friends. Now I am only a subordinate.
The first time I bumped into Jiang Wenxu and took a boy out to eat was three or four years ago. The child is definitely not the first one to talk to Jiang Wenxu. It’s strange to say it. I don’t know why Jiang Wenxu’s taking others out when he started will avoid me until I see that I don’t have the meaning of a confession. Completely broke the cans and broke.
From then on, I was faintly aware that Jiang Wenxu had changed. I still thought sillyly. He and He Zhishu’s seven-year itch have nothing to do. How did the 20th year of Jiang Wenxu make such a broken thing?
During that time, Jiang Wenxu was particularly crazy to play, and men and women were not jealous. The most ridiculous thing was that he changed three companions in a week. It took a few months for such a day until a young girl came to the company to find him. When Jiang Wenxu was about to leave, he received a phone call from He Zhishu.
He Zhishu rarely called Jiang Wenxu, this time still in such a good time. I secretly looked at Jiang Wenxu, unexpectedly watching the man stunned and then quickly opened the distance with the female partner next to him. When Jiang Wenxu connected the call of He Zhishu, the strange softness and gentle voice: “Knowing the book, is there anything?… The company is very busy during this time…. Are you still late?… Can you go back at night, what do you want? ?? Good, love you.”
Jiang Wenxu sat silent for a while after hanging up the phone. The girl didn’t know what happened and tempted him. Jiang Wenxu waved his hand: “Let’s go, not to find me later.”
After a long time, there was no more people around him.
I don’t understand Jiang Wenxu. He has no feelings about He Zhishu, but this is not a fig leaf for so many wrong things he has done. A man’s love can’t completely separate his body from his heart. Loyalty is the bottom line.
Later, Jiang Wenxu was intoxicated, and it is said that this is a junior artist who Jiang Wenxu met at a college symposium. Jiang Wenxu’s favorite type of lover is a student who has not yet had an ivory tower and is simple and beautiful. After he was drunk, he did not find anyone else.
I know that there are a lot of things that know the book is definitely well-known. The lover around him changes a little more than the nuances of my outside body. However, He Zhishu has never been troubled, so he has tolerated Jiang Wenxu. He did not say that Jiang Wenxu really thought that he did not know, and when he was intoxicated, he could call He Zhishu to say that the company was busy.
Jiang Wenxu gradually turned into indulgence numbness from the beginning of the guilty derailment, I am chilling for the knowledge of the book.
So when I first knew that He Zhishu had left Jiang Wenxu, he even took a sigh of relief. So in the end, no matter how painful Jiang Wenxu suffers, I have only pity on him at most, and I have never had sympathy.
When I lost, I learned how to write “self-acceptance”. It was too late.
The last time I saw He Zhishu was to send him dumplings. It was snowing that day and it was very cold. But when the door opened, I saw the thin and sloppy person, I think the house is colder than the snow outside. Jiang Wenxu didn’t know where it was. There was only one box of dumplings that had gradually lost its temperature at night.
Until He Zhishu left, Jiang Wenxu went to Hangzhou to find someone when he collapsed. I realized that I had a leukemia long before He Zhishu had known that I had been alone for a long time. I always wondered how God likes to make jokes so much.
So long after, I remembered that He Zhishu always felt uncomfortable in his heart and hurt him. I have seen his best look, gentle and gentle and confident, I have seen him look like a wolf, a person standing at the door to take the lunch box, behind the empty house.
Recalling that Jiang Wenxu started from his deep feelings – his gentleness is left to a person, possessive and strong, love not to be jealous, will not have all the most touching romance. End with his sorrow – the lover around him, the lie on the phone, the disappointment of a true love.
The departure of He Zhishu became a complete journey. I personally watched Jiang Wenxu being swallowed up by the boundless darkness. His pain and despair, his heartbreaking, he poured a drink into the stomach when he was bleeding. Know the book…”. Jiang Wenxu’s pain is true, remorse is true, but he can’t erase the mistakes he made.
Before the birthday of He Zhishu, I booked an Akita for the kennel from Jiang Wenxu. This puppies later accompanied Jiang Wenxu through the most tormented time. Jiang Wenxu’s hatred of animals gradually faded. Once I went to Jiang Wenxu’s house to send the information needed for the next day’s negotiations. He asked me to open the door myself. When I entered the door, I saw Jiang Wenxu holding the Akita who grew taller. Looking at “Faithful Dogs”, there was no light in the room. The film was dark and unclear and cast on Jiang Wenxu’s side face. At that moment, I actually saw this man crying.
The movie has already reached the end, and the man selling the hot dog said to Xiao Ba: “You don’t wait, he won’t come back…” It was such an instant that Jiang Wenxu was as sad as the dog.
After the lights were turned on, Jiang Wenxu’s tears had disappeared, leaving only tired numbness on his face. He stood up, and Akita was very happy to run over and cheer with me.
Jiang Wenxu went to take the beer and asked if I wanted it. I have to drive back and refuse. He drank himself.
He seems to have something to say to me.
“I have always thought of the previous things, but I thought about it when I was at school. I thought much about the years when I first came to Beijing.” Jiang Wenxu stood back to the floor window and perfectly hidden his emotions: “If you are It’s fine to see someone who can wake me up at one time… but you don’t, Jingwen doesn’t…”
I can’t help but smile: “Which I am qualified to manage the personal affairs of the boss. Moreover, at that time, Mr. He is no longer in the company. You are angry with me. Who cares for me?” I said it was easy, but my heart was like a mountain. I actually regret it.
Jiang Wenxu smiled lowly, and the meaning of self-deprecation was very heavy: “Also… How can I always think about my own mistakes and bear with me?… The documents are on the table, let’s go.”
This evening, Jiang Wenxu’s fragility in holding Akita’s movie tears seemed to be my illusion. But Jiang Wenxu is indeed more and more silent, and he is slowly overwhelmed by the invisible burden.
Finally, one day Jiang Wenxu disappeared completely. Zhang Jingwen temporarily picked up his class. I don’t know if Jiang Wenxu will return, but my heart has always been inexplicable. Jiang Wenxu will at least not go with He Zhishu at least.
Because he wants to redeem, he has to compensate, and he has to taste the taste of waiting.
He Zhishu may be just a cup of white water for Jiang Wenxu. He started to quench his thirst and then fell in love with a variety of beverages. When the water is exhausted, he knows that the lost is the indispensable thing in life.
Life can’t come back, it’s better for people around you, don’t know how to cherish it because you don’t lose it, don’t regret it because you miss it. This is what I learned after ten years of study, and I want to tell everyone.