The Earl’s Bad Wife - Chapter 10

Chapter 10 Reflection and Resolution

In the end, I went back home in a daze.

The various information and memories I had until now were getting entangled in my head and were in a state where I couldnt put them in order.

When I returned home, Mother fretted over me saying I looked pale.

I was at a loss about whether to tell her about the matter of the child but I decided I better consult with my husband first. I told Mother that I was going to rest for a while and headed to my room.

Id usually swing a sword or read philosophical books when Im trying to calm down.

But right now, I really dont feel like doing any of those.

I realized Ive been acting strange since I got married no, since a little bit before that.

Had I not been like myself?

Once I indulged myself in thought for a while, I realized Ive been like this since meeting my husband.

Was it because my pride kept getting hurt with the continuous losses and I was losing my fighting spirit or something? Even though this was about me, I dont quite understand.

In the first place, why did I care about something like winning or losing? I pressed my past self for answers.

And leaving that aside, I was nothing but cruel to my husband.

Believing the gossips as they were, I didnt even try to see him for who he really was.

My husband, Eric Von Weimar, praises me lavishly when he opens his mouth and acts overprotective towards me. But hed maintain a certain level of distance and I never once felt him look at me lewdly or anything.

If I were to say then he was just a harmless con-man.

Id forced unreasonable demands on such a man and expected those demands to be granted like it was only natural. If the rumours about him were a misunderstanding, then that means Ive been tremendously impolite.

The worst of the worst, with no consideration for her partner. A selfish, haughty, bad wife.

That was me right now.

The result of naively thinking that Ill get pardoned because my husband had a bad reputation.

What should I do? What was the best thing to do? Right now, I dont know.

In any case, I have to talk with my husband.

Taking into consideration that I had various things to reflect on, I told the maids to avoid going near my room.

As I waited for my husband to return in the evening, I had time to sort out my thoughts.

Three hours later.

Thinking Id go rest a bit, I fell asleep before I knew it after leaning on the back of the couch.

In my dreams, I saw a memory from the past.

That was how old was I back then?

It was a memory of the day when the knights assembled and offered to teach us how to use a sword.

Yearning to be like Dorotheoneesama, who served as a knight for the queen, Id thought of how I wanted to be able to wield a sword too.

I gladly joined in, but a boy my age went and told me: Girls dont wield swords. Be a good girl and stay at home.

He wouldnt believe anything I told him about Dorotheoneesama so I went to Mother in tears.

its no fair! So what if Im a girl, I can do it if I try!! I mean, look at Dorotheoneesama, she became a splendid knight respected by everyone!!

I felt an emotion that was as fiery as hell fire. It was quite intense for a child burning in rage.

After that, I

At that moment, I woke up with a start.

It seems Id been sleeping with my forehead drenched in sweat while furrowing my eyebrows.

An old memory resurfaced in my dreams so I wound up letting out a large sigh.

I realized why I was particular over winning or losing against the opposite sex.

What happened that day was probably the trigger that led me to beg Dorotheoneesama to teach me swordsmanship.

That boy what family had he been from? The only thing I could remember was that hed been a brown-haired, ill-tempered young boy.

With the chime of the clock, I came back to my senses.

Its evening now.

Its about time I get dressed.

The reason I had to look pretty when I appear in front of that man was so that Im prepped for a fight no, I mean, so that Im decent.

It seems my husband returned home without stopping by his workplace so he was still in his uniform.

I sat in front of my husband, who just came back, with a nervous expression in my face.

Thanks for the good work

Yes, thank you very much

When I asked whether he was tired, he replied that he was fine.

Dont they say that lifes worth living after you get married? I feel fulfilled now more than ever before

Really? If so, then thats good

The room went silent as a grave.

Even though I had to quickly tell him about it, no words would come out of my mouth.

Now I understand the meaning as to why Keira Von Plovak kept opening and closing her mouth before.

Even though I was doing it, I wasnt making any progress.

Preparing myself for the worst, I decided to seek my husband for advice.

Theres something I want to talk about

Yes

That is, Keira Von Plovak has given birth

I told him the child had black hair and blue eyes.

Is that so?

Based on his reaction, it was like I was telling him something trivial like how itll rain tomorrow.

His palor remained the same but the smile on his face disappeared.

After that, my husband stared at me, waiting for me to say something.

T-that is, uhm

I gave an apology together with a bow of my head.

I aplogized to him over believing the rumours and misunderstood him.

There were a lot that I had to apologise for aside from that. But I feel like its wrong to say it now so I refrained from doing so.

Im really sorry. I was rude not asking you for the truth

Despite what I had done to him, my husband forgave me.

You dont have to mind it. Since even if you asked, I couldnt talk about it due to imperial order after all

Is that so

With a gentle tone, my husband asked me what well do.

Eh, what do mean by what?

Please decide how we should proceed, Herminsama. Ill do as you command

as I command, you say

No, your sincerity isnt important right now

Whats more, Im surprised youll leave a very important decision to me.

What if we dont adopt the child?

Then it will be arranged that a special facility in the Schneider region will take care of the child

The Schneider region.

An isolated village surrounded by a tall mountain range that would be difficult to reach by those unfamiliar with its snowy landscape.

Since ancient times, the royal familys illegitimate children are sent there. Its also a place where they isolate blood relatives so that the royal family bloodline will not cease in times of war, widespread diseases or calamities

The Schneider region.

A place thats dim nearly all year round and where the sun rarely rises.

Saying that a facility that protects the royal family bloodline was there is

If in the event we adopt the child, I decided on saying we adopted your sisters child

Eh?

I have the aproval from the prince and Marquis Synek

Marquis Synek was Dorotheoneesamas husband.

It seems he decided on saying that he adopted a child of onee-sama who supposedly gave birth to triplets recently.

Were you going to make it so that onee-sama gave birth to quadruplets?

Thats right

He says if onee-sama hadnt given birth, hed have found a way to reject my demands.

It seems they overlapped by chance so he was able to turn the situation for the better.

What should we do?

u-uhm

I told Keira Von Plovak I would adopt the child. Breaking a promise wasnt good.

Regretting my past actions, I fell into a total slump.

Everything was because of my own unbelievably foolish actions.

The consequence where I troubled onee-sama also landed a critical hit.

Doing something like troubling my beloved sister, which I considered at the top of the things that should never be done, merited certain death.

When I asked my husband whether or not to adopt the child, he told me he was fine with either options.

To oneesama, my brother-in law, my uncle and my husband.

To everyone, who I got involved in my reckless decision, I want to deeply lower my head and apologise.

I wound up doing something that cant be undone, I thought as I buried my head in my hands.

My nerves ended up coming out as tears. I feel so embarrassed.

While I was in that state, my husband gently cheered me up.

I decided to inform Mother about this incident for once.

I thought shed be surprised but instead, Mother looked calm.

When I asked if she knew about the truth, she shook her head to the sides.

If you observe how Eric-san acts everyday, youll know he isnt the man the rumour paints him to be

yeah

It seems Mother had pieced things together.

Looks like I was the only one who fell for the rumours.

Im worrying about what to do, to be honest

Should I send the child to the place she should be, or not?

It wasnt something I can decide lightly.

I wonder why it happened this way

All this time, Ive been a selfish and ignorant young lady.

I wonder if someone like me could be able to become a parent for the child.

Hermina, taking care of a child everyday is a priceless thing, you know

Eh

Parents learn a lot together with a child who doesnt know a thing too

Then, would I be able to become a parent?

Yes, of course you can

If youre ignorant, you can learn together with the child.

When you hear the childs selfishness, you can think back on your own selfishness.

Thats what my mother said to me.

After I heard her say that, my heart was set.

With that, I decided to adopt the princes child.