The Genius’ First Love - Chapter 636
“It’s alright third miss,” Ziggy ended his sighs. “Truth was I felt sorry for myself and guilty at the same time. You were pregnant with my child and while you were struggling alone, scared and anxious. I was at Hampshire pursuing something else,”
“It wasn’t your fault too,” Dannah tried to lessen his self-guilt, hoping her words can be of enough remedy. “I know there was even the smallest hint that you have seen…I know you could have done something but I didn’t leave you any so…please don’t take it against your own. It was my mistake,”
“I don’t blame you. I don’t at all,” Ziggy assured her, seeing how their son’s death was also hard for Dannah.
Dannah smiled a bit relieved. Not telling Ziggy about it was another weight to the burden she had been carrying, at least for now, she can lessen up some loads. “Thank you. That’s all I need,”
“And….and by the way,” Dannah idled for a moment as she reminisced her child’s face. Her throat was already wet as her tears were threatening to fall. “He had grey eyes like yours and tiny curly hairs. He looks like you, in every way. I also didn’t get to hear him cry, he didn’t cry when I gave birth to him, that’s when Scar knew there was something wrong,”
“Did you have a hard time giving birth to him?”
“A bit. Just a bit.” Dannah hesitated to answer it fully knowing it would only make Ziggy feel more miserable. “But Scar was there. He held my hand and never left the room even when the doctors told him so and he took care of me after so I guess it wasn’t that hard,”
Ziggy didn’t answer at that so Dannah felt the need to continue. “Also I buried him in the—”
“In the cliff,” Ziggy continued the words for her as it was obvious she was having a hard time finishing it. “I figured out there was no other place you’d possibly like to bury him but there,”
“You went there?” Dannah asked, not surprised that Ziggy managed to know. The cliff was a relevant place for them both. It was once their favorite place in the world and once, Ziggy knew her so well that it was possible for him to find where she would hide her treasures and gems.
“I rang some farmers there and asked if there was a grave. They said yes” After the accident, Ziggy couldn’t ask Dannah further about his son and so he had someone look into it. As per the grave, he had suspected Dannah buried their son in the place where they used to frequent and shared some life wishes and hopes. He remembered it was Dannah’s favorite place on earth and probably the only place where she will be at peace burying her son and he wasn’t wrong. ‘They also recalled seeing you a few years ago with a man. You stayed in there for days,”
“I see,” Dannah’s curiosity was filled by remembering how she returned to such a place years ago to bury her child. Scar had been with him and comforted her in any way possible and yes, she stayed there for days because she couldn’t bear to leave the son she buried in the cliff. It took Scar days to finally convince her to leave.
Right then she knew there was nothing more to say to him. There was something deep down in her heart that wished to ask if somehow in the past he had loved her, or if there can still be hope for them but she chose to ignore it.
Love is not what they need now, healing is.
She was not a fool to not see they were all hurting and exhausted. Many things and tragedies had made them so. So right then, she knew, Ziggy didn’t need her love and she cannot hold on to him. She was just thankful that for once, she had been deeply and truly happy being by his side. The memory of what they had was enough at the moment.
“I wish you good fortune youngest sire,” Dannah flushed a hopeful smile this time. A smile that promises that somehow, someday, they will all be okay.
When she implicitly bid her farewell, there was part in Ziggy that wanted to hold her back. However he could see that her real wings were just starting to unfold and that she was meant to fly high rather than just be with his side. And so, even when his heart somehow craved for her, hoping to finish something they had started, he too chose to let go.
He responded with her smile and replied. “I wish you good fortune too, Third Miss,”
After that, Dannah immediately turned her back to Ziggy with her fist balled, shaking. She didn’t think she needed more courage to walk away where in fact the thing they shared in the past only happened only for a short while. Yet that short moment changed her, a lot. The tears that she was trying hard to control crept out of her eyes, warming her cheeks but instead of wiping them off away, she let them fall in her pretty face, endlessly.
Those tears bore all the feelling she was keeping inside—the loss, the love, the past and probably the fear of the future. Will she ever manage to become more happier tomorrow than how she had been with him in the past?
Ziggy on the other hand looked at Dannah with so much regret. If there was one big thing he wanted to change in the past, it was how he and Dannah ended. He let her slipped into her hands just because of a stupid ouburst and the next day, the woman he felt very at home with, immediately became a stranger he can no longer reach into.
Truth was, inside him, the thing he had for Dannah didn’t actually end and he wasn’t sure it will ever do in the near future.