The Golden Eyes of the Wolf - Chapter 7 Seven

Shaking his head with a wistful smile, Noah explained, “While traveling between worlds, you can’t bring anything with you,” and when he saw the puzzled look on the younger man’s face, he continued. “If I go with you, when we step into your world, even if we are close, holding each other’s hands and stuff, you won’t have a clue of who I am. You can’t remember me, and neither can I. Instead, your own memories will rush back to you. I, on the other hand, will be lost with no memory from my life here. And if I turn into a wolf in that world, I might scare the hell out of myself and people around me.” He sighed. “As much as I love being with you Mat, I can’t come with you. And I can’t force you to stay. So this is it. This is goodbye.”

A lengthy pause. Both men were thinking when Noah spoke again. “All you have to do is step inside that tree, and close your eyes. The next thing you know is that you’re back home.” Biting his lower lip to restrain the tears, Noah looked at the redhead beside him. A faint, shaky smile on his face. “Can I have my last kiss?” he asked.

Mateo nodded and leaned forward to give the man a proper kiss, but instead, Noah just pecked him once, breathed him in, and kept his eyes closed.

“Awkward,” Noah chuckled nervously, feeling disappointed. His heart was not beating like mad any more. He could not feel his heart in his chest. All he felt was a very sharp pain. “I have to go,” he turned to leave. “I can’t watch you leave.” His back facing the redhead, the man just waved goodbye and started to walk away.

And Mateo said nothing. He did nothing. He just stood there, overwhelmed with all the information and feelings that were hitting him one after another.

He just stood there and watched Noah disappear among the trees.

######

He didn’t go to work that day. He just turned off his phone and walked all over the city all day. Never once did he stop to rest or eat something. He just walked.

And by the end of the day, just like any other man, he decided to drown his sorrows in the bottom of a bottle. Which didn’t help him much. All it did was make him a little soft, but not drunk.

Weary and bone-tired, he opened the door to his apartment and dragged his body to the bedroom. Taking off his clothes one by one, with only his boxers on; he sneaked onto the bed and under the covers. Wrapping the blankets around himself and closing his eyes tightly, he tried to sleep.

“Noah, dinner!” he heard the baritone voice calling for him just like the other nights. That deep and lovely voice. How he wished it was true. How he wished it wasn’t just him daydreaming. Hoping.

By now, Mateo was in his own home, not even remembering who Noah was. So, the wolf forced himself to sleep; this was just a hallucination because he desperately wanted the redhead to be there. He shut his eyes tightly, a rogue tear falling out of the corner of his eye.

A few minutes later, when he was actually sleeping, someone pulled the covers away from him, jostling him awake and leaving him lying on the bed with nothing covering his practically naked body.

“Hey! I said dinner is ready. Come on, move the big butt!” it was the redhead, standing by the bed, smirking down at the confusion plastered all over the older man’s face.

Mateo was there.

Mateo.

“Mateo?” Noah muttered, staring at him in disbelief. Rubbing his eyes in disbelief, he asked, “How? Why are you here? I mean… you were supposed to,” he was unable to finish any of his questions.

“Let me help you a bit,” the redhead said, sitting on the bed, in front of the shocked man. “I still have the keys, so that’s how. Forgot to leave them behind this morning, which was a blessing in disguise. I’m here because this is the only place that feels like home to me. And yes, I was supposed to leave but I didn’t.” he explained, all the while smiling at Noah.

“But why?”

“Why?”

“Why didn’t you leave?” Noah asked, frowning.

Mateo sighed. “Many reasons. Many things held me back. You were one of them,” he smiled gently at the man. “But my fears also were a part of it. I don’t know if by not going back I’m hurting anybody. I don’t know if anyone’s been mourning my absence all this time. I don’t even know if anyone has been celebrating my absence, to be honest. But I’m here. Have been here for a while now and I have a life that I actually love. I have you. I have that dumb Angel, and Asher is a good fellow.” he sighed again. Taking Noah’s trembling hands, he kept on talking, his eyes focused on the hands he was holding.

“When you left me there this morning, I sat there and just thought. I thought about everything. So many what-if questions popped up in my head. I went through them all. I couldn’t just leave you. You mean so much to me. Even if it pisses me off that you didn’t tell me all this sooner, even if it still pisses me off that you kept this from me for such a long time… I kinda understand where you’re coming from too. So I guess what I’m trying to say is that I wanna stay. With you.” He looked up at Noah, who was crying silently.

“Hope I hadn’t fucked it all up with the way I reacted to you last night,” Mateo blushed, smiling sheepishly.

Noah didn’t say anything.

Not a word.

And as the silence expanded between them, Mateo started getting anxious.

Maybe he was wrong. Maybe Noah didn’t want him there anymore. Maybe it was just too late now.

“No,” Noah finally said.

And Mateo’s heart stopped at that. No. No. No.