The Journey of Flower - Chapter 139.1
Part1: Deep love will not last forever
T/N- Finally we have come to the final chapter of Hua Qiangu. Thank you for following my translation. This final chapter is too long, I’ll break it into two parts. There are still 5 more epilogues left, I will try to finish them by the end of the year if I’m too busy ‘^^
Hua Qiangu was scared out of her wits almost get down on her knees. But when she thought about it again, he doesn’t care about her, what is the point to continue staying here.
“I am going to find Dongfang….”
Bai Zihua slowly turned around. His eyes are dark, with no reflection, as if they are going to suck people in.
What a good disciple he taught. Leaving home in the middle of the night to elope with a man.
“I said you are not allowed to see him again.”
“I don’t care. I want to marry him, be his bride!”
Such a vow, such a firm gaze, looked like Hua Qiangu has no longer have any obsession with him. This feeling makes Bai Zihua’s rage flaring up even more, almost unable to control himself.
“Without my permission, you are not allowed to take a step out of Cloud Mountain!”
Hua Qiangu has never scolded by her like this, all her grievances suddenly came out.
“For what reason, I can’t go? I’m just your disciple, not your prisoner, or your slave! I like Dongfang! No one can separate us!”
Bai Zihua’s expression was like the cracking glass. Hua Qiangu felt regretted after saying this, she swallowed her saliva with fear.
At that moment, nearby noise was heard, under the moonlight, a man slowly came out from a cloud of thick smoke. Covered in dew, but instantly lit up by Hua Qiangu’s eagerness.
“Dongfang!” She was about to cry from joy. Shifu destroyed the paper talisman. She has no way to contact him. She hasn’t seen him for many days, she’s almost dying from anxiousness: “How come you here?”
“Don’t you want to leave? I come to pick you up …”
In a trance, she felt like someone once said that to her. Hua Qiangu suddenly turned red. Her intuition wants to step forward and dive into his arms, but under Bai Zihua’s scary gaze, she did not dare to move.
“Very well. You come to seek death yourself, save me from looking for you.” Bai Zihua’s tone was calm and smooth, but there was a wave of great anger hidden in it, stirring up with unpredictable murderous aura.
Dongfang Yuqing still smiles as always: “Bai Zihua, you are afraid of me, aren’t you? When you learned that Gu Tuo met me, and knew that I am not dead yet, you are more afraid that can’t even sleep, am I right?”
Bai Zihua did not answer. He is afraid of him. The scene when Dongfang died and Hua Qiangu crying and promised him to leave with him still vivid in his mind. However, when she died, she said if she could start all over again, she would never fall in love with him again. It’s a nightmare that haunts him forever.
In fact, between him and Dongfang Yuqing, she has already made a choice a long time ago. It was himself who forced her to stay by his side, imprisoned her and refused to let her go.
Therefore, when Dongfang Yuqing appeared again, how could he not be afraid! How could he not panic! How could he not hut!
In a blink of an eye, he has already arrived in front of Dongfang Yuqing. With a sword in his hand pointing at Dongfang. Only half an inch closer his head will be cut off.
Hua Qiangu kneeled down on the ground in frightened. She has never seen Shifu so ruthless like this before. Is he really going to kill Dongfang?
“Shifu! I beg you! Don’t!” Dongfang is just a mortal. He doesn’t even have the power to fight back, but Bai Zihua could not wait to turn the person in front of him into ash. There’s a little bit of reason left, he knew that no reason to do this because the one that at wrong is himself. But he can’t afford to lose her again, he stepped forward slowly …and the murderous aura circled around the two.
Hua Qiangu’s face was full of tears. She kneeled down and kowtow in horror. Knocking her head one after another, her forehead started to bleed from her hitting on the ground.
“Shifu, it’s my fault, nothing to do with Dongfang! If you want to kill include me in! I really like Dongfang, I want to go with him! I beg you to fulfill us!”
Bai Zihua became dizzy felt the world seems to turn around all of sudden. What is going on? Why would the woman he loves the most kneel on the ground and begging him to fulfill her with another man?
Xiao Gu, isn’t the person you love the most is Shifu?
His expression was at a loss. He remembered the day she committed a big mistake wanted to get rid of Ni Mantian. She kneeled in the courtyard and kowtowed her head nonstop. That day it was raining heavily, the yard was full of her blood, causing all the peach trees died overnight.
How long is it? Under the same moonlight, but different scenes. She once again kneeled in front of him and asked him to let her go?
If he lets her go, what about himself?
He’s already has nothing left, he’s no longer belong to the Immortal Realm, to Changliu. The world is so big, but there is no place for him. Except for Xiao Gu, he doesn’t know what is there to live for.
He left with no right to choose, or to be free. If she ultimately will leave him, what is left of him?
Xiao Gu, didn’t you promise to never leave Shifu?
Bai Zihua looking at the strange yet familiar person in front of him, his throat felt salty. He then turned to look at Dongfang Yuqing.
It’s all because of you. If it’s not you…. “Shifu! Don’t!”
Hua Qiangu only saw a silver light between Bai Zihua’s fingers, and instantly shrouded Dongfang Yuqing.
Under the brilliance light, Dongfang Yuqing smiled became a bit strange, and then saw another figure jumped into and blocked the blow. There was a huge roar of an explosion causing smoke everywhere. Bai Zihua flew up and then fell heavily to the ground.
Hua Qiangu stood up with her face covered with blood. Her eyes were wide and bright, too scary to look at. There was a trace of evilness in her anger.
“No one is allowed to hurt him in front of my eyes!”
The smell of blood in the air made her feel as if she had gone back to the day when her heart was broken into pieces. She could only helplessly watched Dongfang, and Xiao Ye died in front of her. It’s so painful that feeling like her heart being smashed again. Never allowed it! She will never allow such a thing to happen again! Bai Zihua knew that she’s gradually resuming her knowledge. He could hardly speak under the heavy blow. Lightly coughed out a bit of blood, and felt that his bones, and outside injury were slowly healing.
However, the whole person seemed to have been drawn out of all the strength, couldn’t stand up and collapse on the ground in despair. She actually for the sake of Dongfang Yuqing…. In this lifetime, if it likes what she said, she will not love him again.
He doesn’t know whether to be sad of pitiful for himself. He saw Dongfang Yuqing slowly walked toward him, and Hua Qiangu was mind still in chaos hasn’t recovered her yet. She stood still there like a wooden.
“Bai Zihua, today Hua Qiangu is not the same as the past Hua Qiangu who deeply in love with you. In fact, yourself haven’t figured it out. You love her but want to escape from her. Want to cherish what you have now but still immersed in the pain of the past unable to extricate yourself. After spending more than ten years of teaching her, you have taught her to be a good-for-nothing. After watching her for a long time, even yourself are confused about who she is and confused about why yourself is still alive. Being with her, to you is like a redemption but also a lingering death, suffering in agony at all times. You are unwilling to let her go, but will never be able to accept her as well because deep down in your heart, you clearly know that she is different from the past Xiao Gu that you love. Accepting her would make you feel like a betrayer. When holding her, you felt like holding someone else at the same time, this made you feel really guilty. But you won’t be able to live if you leave her. How long this eternal pain will continue?”
Bai Zihua did not speak, the murderous air around was filled with despair and dead silence.
“This life I came, I never thought about hurting her or using it. At that time, you are for the sake of Changliu, and me for the sake of Yi Xiu Ge Pavilion, so we both are no different. We all abandoned her and wronged her for the sake of the Six Realms. Actually, since then both of us have no qualifications to have her. Everyone has to pay the price for own choice. I also regretted it, so what I can do now is to do my best to make up for it. Stop deceiving yourself and others, this isn’t fair for her as well. Don’t treat her like a child anymore, otherwise, she will only be a child forever and can’t really be Hua Qiangu she used to be.
Bai Zihua shook his head. If she becomes a previous Hua Qiangu, would she be able to forgive him? That’s when he really lost her.
“Shifu!” Hua Qiangu finally recovered her mind and saw Bai Zihua seemed to suffer from a serious injury lying on the ground. She was so frightened that her face turned green and quickly ran to look at his injuries. Tears kept falling from her eyes.
“Sorry, Shifu. I didn’t mean it. I just don’t want you to kill Dongfang! If you are really not allowed, I will not go with him. I will go back with you. Without your permission, I will never step out of Cloud Mountain. Just please don’t kill him …”
Bai Zihua laughed at himself. Is she sacrificing herself for Dongfang Yuqing? When did you become a mean and hateful parent who is breaking up a pair of mandarin ducks?
Dongfang Yuqing’s shadow faded slowly under the moonlight: “Bai Zihua, I will not fight with you. I just want to make up for what I missed. Her soul is gradually become perfect, although still weak and limited, one day all memories will be restored. This is the fact that you can’t change. If she wants to leave you by then, nothing can stop me……”
Bai Zihua looked at him in shock: “You actually have already….”
The corner of Dongfang Yuqing’s mouth lifted up with a sad smile and he gradually disappeared.
He is not a good teacher, not a good sect leader, always has to sacrifice one to save the other.
He can hardly remember how he lived before Xiao Gu appeared. Thousands of years flowing silently, but he always took it for granted, didn’t feel that it was a good thing or a bad thing. Later, after Xiao Gu appeared in his life, everything changed quietly. He began to become unlike himself or perhaps, this is the real him?
The saddest thing in the world is when the one who used to love you deeply and when she became your everything, you are no longer important to her.
He escaped, he was resolute and stubborn. For so many years, he couldn’t even hear a word she said she loved him.
Although he said that, he would give her whatever she asked for, but the funny and sad thing is she doesn’t want him.
The painful scare that always stays with him feeling light and heavy pain from time to time as the flesh he plucked out at that year seemed to have never healed. For so many years, each pain reminded him of his mistake. Day and night, he repeatedly saw the same dream of killing her at that time.
“Shifu…..”
Her hands held his trembling cramping left hand tightly. Bai Zihua felt his sleeves was lifted, he wanted to pull it back covered up that scare, but he felt the warm fingertips caressing the scare, followed by the cold lips and moisten cheek sticking on it.
“Shifu…not hurt…” Hua Qiangu was sitting in front of the bed, holding his arm tightly.
Bai Zihua slowly opened his eyes and reached out to touch her hair.
“Shifu, I will never leave you again, please don’t be angry at me.” She didn’t remember what happened just now, only staring at Bai Zihua with worried. His arm seems to be getting more and more painful. How important the previous Xiao Gu to him for making him can’t forget her, again and again and lost conscious from extreme pain?
“Shifu is not angry at you.” Bai Zihua’s eyes were calm and indifferent with a trace of compassion. What she said was right, he has no right to bind her. The mistakes she made, the debt she owed, she has already paid it off in her last life with her death. Dongfang was right, his heart is full of the inner demon, and it will only hurt her like the last time.
Hua Qiangu held his hand even tighter, buried her head in his arms and slightly trembling. Although she wanted to marry Dongfang, she never thought about leaving Shifu. For so many years, Shifu is her everything, she was too angry at the time, just because she thought that Shifu doesn’t want her anymore. However, at the moment she saw Shifu fell to the ground from high above, she was so scared that almost stopped breathing. She finally realized how important Shifu is to her. She would rather die herself than makes Shifu feel a little unhappy.
So…. so she finally ate the elixir pill that was given by Dongfang Yuqin and decided to go back to being that Xiao Gu, who is always in Shifu’s mind. No matter whether that Xiao Gu is really her or someone else. She can’t distinguish it and also doesn’t want to distinguish it. As long as he likes it, he can take her as whoever he wants her to be, she is no longer upset about it.
Bai Zihua’s heart was distress and bitter. At first, he felt a little fuzzy but suddenly saw smoky dust in front of him, sending a chill to his right arm. White yarn falling in front of the bed moves gently with the wind giving him a dream-like illusion.
“Xiao Gu, what are you doing?” He looked down and saw that she was carefully plastering his scar with a wry smile. How could it be better?
“Shifu, don’t move around. Wait till medicine’s rub in first.” Hua Qiangu rushed out and brought back a bowl of porridge.
“Shifu, are you hungry?” She blew it with her mouth to cool it down and then fed it to Bai Zihua.
How could he possibly feeling hungry: “Xiao Gu is learning to cook?”
Hua Qiangu nodded with embarrassment: “I only know how to cook this one….” It used to be the shifu who took care of her, she didn’t need to do anything. Now, her turned wanted to take care of shifu, but it seemed like it’s already too late. She couldn’t do anything at all. That Hua Qiangu after restoring her memory, should be very smart and sensible, can do everything, right?
Bai Zihua was already feeling fine, but he didn’t feel like moving his hand, so indulge himself in her little care, letting her fed him mouthful after mouthful of porridge.
Looking up and watching the outside rain. Xiao Gu has been by his side all these years, but why does he still feel so cold and lonely?
Hua Qiangu saw Bai Zihua looking out of the window, she couldn’t help but feel emotional. Over the years, she’s slowly growing up, but time seemed to never leave a little bit of trace on Shifu. He sat there so quietly like a man carved with ice snow, so beautiful to the point of making one feeling sorrow and helpless …she knew that although he is in front of her, but the one he is yearning for is another Xiao Gu. She reached out her hand and held him tightly.
“Shifu, don’t worry. I ate the elixir pill that Dongfang gave me, I should be able to recover my memory very soon. By then, you will see the previous Xiao Gu.”
Bai Zihua was shocked, he grabbed her shoulder with unbelievable.
“Xiao Gu, what are you talking about?!! Do you know what this means? Your spirit has just got better!” Maybe in the eyes of others, it’s just a matter of remembrance, but for herself who knows nothing at the moment, means that she has to accept another memory and life and makes herself into another person. How dare she…..
Hua Qiangu smiled and nodded hard: “Of course I know. I want to return the old Xiao Gu to Shifu. Even if I have to die, I don’t want to live my whole life in ignorance.”
Bai Zihua’s hands were trembling. Why is she still so stupid like before even has to sacrifice herself still wants to fulfill him? But she didn’t know that as long as he has her to accompany him day and night like right now, it’s his greatest wish. She thought that she is going to return the old Xiao Gu to him, but in fact, she is going to completely take her away from him.
Bai Zihua smiled with bitterness while holding her in his embrace. He originally thought that he at least could enjoy the days with her for hundreds of years, but didn’t expect it came earlier than his thoughts. He could not escape it, in the end still couldn’t escape it…..
“Xiao Gu, you can leave first, Shifu wants to be alone.”
Hua Qiangu saw his face became void and faintly discernible, she felt some worried as she stepped out of the door.
In the dead of the night, her head felt hurt a little bit, but there is nothing else apart from that. She sat on the side of the table and for the first time picked up a brush with such solemn expression.
“This letter is for you, Xiao Gu, after restored your memory. I am sure after taking medicine I will be able to remember the past but I am not sure if I will forget the present. I am afraid to make such a bet, so I’ll leave this letter for you to remind myself of the happiest and most beautiful day of my life during this time. I also want to tell you that you should cherish the things before your eyes, I hope you can see it. If you really come back to replace the current me and no longer remember those years when I stayed in Cloud Mountain with my Shifu, I think I will be very sad, but I will not regret it. I don’t know what happened between you and Shifu that makes Shifu miss you so much but dare not let you come back, afraid of losing you. I just want to tell you that I entrust the humming beast and my family to you, you must not let me down. You also can’t leave Shifu behind otherwise even I turned into a ghost I will come back to seek revenge on you. If you return and still remember those unhappy things and refuse to stay with Shifu then let me tell you all the happy things that happened during these years……”
By the time Hua Qiangu finished writing the letter, it was already late at night. She carefully held it in her bosom, as her mind became clearer. She was miraculously calm and there was no sign of disappointment or unwillingness.The soul seems to be re-establishing itself, like the moon slowly becoming round.
Looking up at the window, it seemed to be extraordinarily bright outside. She pushed the door open, it is snowing outside no wonder the weather is surprisingly cold.
She walked toward Shifu’s room. There was no lamp light in the room, Bai Zihua was sitting there in the darkness,
“Shifu?” Hua Qiangu lit the light, looking at him with doubt and worry.
Bai Zihua turned his head to look at her and smiled softly. The serious coldness faded, with a pair of bright eyes looked like a living ice sculpture. With a trace of anger that seemed somewhat doesn’t look like him at all.
“Shifu, are you drinking?” She could smell a strong smell of wine mixed with Bai Zihua’s scent making her felt slightly faint.
Bai Zihua waved at her and handed her a cup of wine: “Xiao Gu, this is the peach blossom wine that you personally buried in the Unfeeling Hall that year. Come have one last drink with Shifu.”
Hua Qiangu nodded. She took the cup and sat beside him. After smelling the aroma of the wine, she then sticks out her tongue and licked it. The intoxicating smell made her squint her eyes.Shifu never let her drink before.
Bai Zihua drank the wine from his cup, looking at her eyes that full of struggled and confused.
Hua Qiangu took a few more sips and her words became more than usual. Bai Zihua seemed to be listening to her quietly while his mind wandering.
After a drink, she was already a little confused. She laid on the table and looked at Bai Zihua with a smile.
“Shifu…..”
Her fingers unbridled caressed his cold lips, tears slipped down on her burning cheek. She’s actually really scared, scared that what if she really forget him, forget all the years in Cloud Mountain.
There was a sudden urge in Bai Zihua’s mind. He stood up to hold her up and put her on the couch.
Hua Qiangu looked up at him with intoxicated and confused. Bai Zihua suddenly lowers down his body buried in her neck as he took a long deep sighed.
“Xiao Gu, have you ever thought about marrying shifu?” Why did the one she repeatedly say she wants to marry is Dongfang, but never thought of marrying him? Does she really not love him at all in this life.
Hua Qiangu’s dizzy brain suddenly exploded.
Marry shifu?
She has never thought about it and also dare not to think about it. That person is Shifu ah…. Feeling a hand is removing the belt on her clothes: “Shifu?”
What happened to shifu today?
“Don’t go with him, don’t leave Shifu, will you?” Bai Zihua whispered in a low voice, and the great pain hidden in the voice almost made Hua Qiangu’s heart turned soft enough and forget everything.
“Shifu, you are drunk. Xiao Gu will never leave you.” Hua Qiangu has no doubt and caressed his back and long hair.
“Xiao Gu, don’t you always want shifu, is it… is it like this…you won’t go tomorrow…”
The clothes were taken off, feeling Bai Zihua’s kiss sliding down her neck, Hua Qiangu began to panic. It’s not like the usual intimacy, and there was a special feeling surging up in the cold air that no one could resist. Even her bones turned soft and paralyzed as they were intoxicated by the smell of alcohol and Bai Zihua.
“Shifu… I will not go….”
“Don’t leave me alone….”
“I won’t….”
“Xiao Gu, do you still love shifu?”
“Love?”
Bai Zihua looked up at her confused eyes from intoxicating with tears on her face. This is Xiao Gu, but not the complete her…. Dongfang Yuqing’s voice is ringing in his head.
Didn’t you feel it when you are close to her, but the person in your arms is another person? Don’t you feel guilty inside?
A long sigh.
Bai Zihua, what are you doing?
Do you think by doing this she would not leave you? If you missed it, you will never have a chance to retrieve it. You should be satisfied with all these years of companionship. Don’t you think you hurt her in a previous life is still not enough, want her to hate you more? This time, you should respect her choice.
Hua Qiangu feelings she was hugged tightly in his arms as if about to be crushed. That familiar and cold voice asked her sadly: “Xiao Gu, what should Shifu do in this life so that it won’t be wrong?”
She wanted to answer, but her eyes gradually darkened, and everything in the past has emerged.
It was like having a long dream. A lifetime dream, very vivid and real. The food she ate every day, the color of the clothes she wore, the shape of the white clouds floating in the sky, she could remember everything clearly.
Those love and hate, pain and suffering seem to be too far apart, they became dust over the years, and seem that it is not worth mentioning, but still painfully remains in the bottom of her heart.
When Hua Qiangu opened her eyes again, her face was calm and indifferent.
She was reclining on the couch of the small pavilion by the lake and the wind blowing the curtains. Under the peach blossom tree on the bank, a familiar spotless white figure was standing there alone.
The memory of the past flowed quickly in her mind, looking back, it’s like a passing cloud, yet sometimes it’s always inscribed in her heart. From how she was in hatred and despair, calculated to have Bai Zihua killed her, and then cursed him to never be destroyed or die and later for his sake, she is willing to take the elixir pill in order to become the previous complete Hua Qiangu. She even recalled the time for a piece of paper from God’s Book unexpectedly destroyed the whole Immortal Realm.
She has remembered everything.
Thousands of years of memory came to her mind, the god divine sense became clear and thorough, in a flash it has achieved the supreme enlightenment of all.
But her eyes are still staring at the man in the distance, thinking of the pain she has suffered for him throughout the years and what he has suffered for her….step by step as if from the horizon she slowly walked toward him.The man in front of her is no longer in agony as he was trying to keep her last night, and changed into a cold and distance again.
Why he can be compassionate to the little Xiao Gu, showing tenderness to amnesia Xiao Gu, and in contract, is it really necessary when facing the original her who loves him deeply with such a cold face? Even now, he still refuses to accept her? If it is the case but why he is so insisting for her to stay?
Bai Zihua looked at her quietly, and their gaze caught. Birds flew away from the hill, from path to path no man in sight, the years of chaos have gone by and suddenly broken into grains of dust at the fingertips.
They looked at each other in silence as the two were wrapped in thick sorrow could hardly breathe.
Hua Qiangu slightly moved her lips, but as if she has lost of language ability. There were only a few broken syllables that came from her mouth.
However, Bai Zihua could understand her.
— Is there anything else to say to me?
He sighed. She still couldn’t let it go, still waiting for him to give her an answer. She’s still very persistent like before, but at least it shows that she still loves him.
“Sorry.” Thousands of words and all these years of love and fear only makes out into one word.
Hua Qiangu wanted to laugh, but her facial muscles didn’t listen and remains expressionless.
That’s right. The feeling of love all in all only just a few words: “I love you”, “I hate you”, “Let it go”, “Sorry”, “Forget it”…. but he always said only one word.
She slowly turned around and flew into the sky.
Bai Zihua’s hand that wanted to hold her stiffly stopped in mid-air. He chose to kill her, so what right does he have to keep her?
Slowly lower his eyelids, and the cool lips gently move. He looked up at the clear and boundless sky without a trace of Hua Qiangu.
He knew that she is going to find Dongfang Yuqing. And himself has no business there, it’s time to leave.
————–
She hasn’t been able to fly in the air for a long time, making Hua Qiangu felt a little dizzy. She rushed to find Dongfang Yuqing because she was going to pick up Tangbao, the most important child in the world for her. Dongfang said, when she woke up, Tangbao will wake up at the same time as her.
However, what was waiting for her at the Yu Xiu Ge Pavilion, only a confusedTangbao who just woke up. Tangbao cried with joy when she saw her calling her mother. Hua Qiangu hugged her while kissing her left and right. Tears dropped all over her.
Her deepest pain and hatred in those years, the biggest regret and unwillingness, finally is fulfilled at this moment. Joy and gratitude for regaining the most precious thing in her life, no one can understand it.
Tangbao still remembers everything that happened, but her cultivation and spirit power is not recovering. She will have to re-cultivate from the lowest level.
“Tangbao, where is Dongfang?”
Tangbao looked at Hua Qiangu with tears: “Father…father is dead….”
Hua Qiangu felt like being struck by lightning: “What are you talking about?”
“Gu Tuo, farther is dead.”
“Nonsense! How could he die? I just saw him two days ago.”
“It’s true, Gu Tuo. He died ten years ago. Although the Yu Xiu Ge Lord has the ability to know everything, the price is to die young. This is a fate that cannot escape. Not to mention, in his previous life in order to stay with you for another year, his life in this life is shortened. He knew his time was limited may not be able to see you, so the one you have been seeing is a ghost …”
She has experienced so many storms in her life, but Hua Qiangu still was shaken by this news.
“You mean the person I have seen for a long time turned out to be Dongfang’s ghost?”
Tangbao nodded: “Father died not long after he told Honorable Master about your whereabouts, otherwise he said that he would personally go to Sha Qianmu taking you back and raise you, but he has no choice but to give you to Honorable Master. And then turn into a ghost spirit and stay with you all the time. In fact, all these years he never left, he has been watching you grow up in secret. When he heard you said you wanted to marry him and want to go with him, his heart was looking forward to it. But he was waiting, waiting for the day you to take the pill and recover your memory. If you finally choose to be with him, he will not leave you even if he has to abandon everything. But it’s not until when he saw you recover your memory and still asked Bai Zihua the same question from before, he knew that you can never let go. Feeling dejected he only left me with a few words and went into the reincarnation wheel.
Hua Qiangu shook her head: “How is this possible…”
“At the beginning, father wanted to see you for the last time before he goes, but he was afraid that he will hesitate and unable to let go of the six years of obsession with you. He was also afraid that after you remember everything and see him became like this, you may not make decisions from your true heart, so he will only have to leave without saying goodbye …”
Hua Qiangu slowly retreated two steps while looking around in loss.
Dongfang Yuqing! You lied to me again. How many times do you want to lie to me? Why did you refuse to see me one last time even at your final moment? I have a lot of questions to ask you!
It seems that everything he does is for her own good, but it’s also hurting her at the same time. He seemed to lie to her all the time, but he gave everything without asking for return.
Until now, she never knew which part of his words was true and which part false. Did he really love her, or just his chess piece? Perhaps after thousands of years of reincarnation, he felt bored and just finds a new toy to amuse himself.
Even though he is gone, he still wanted to give her the final fulfillment. Everything became an unsolved mystery, sealed in tongues that stored inside the Yu Xiu Ge Pavilion.
“Did he say anything before he left?
“En, he said he wants you to let go of everything and become Xiao Gu that you used to be. Both of you committed mistakes in last life, let not repeat another mistake in this life.”
Hua Qiangu lowered her head and chucked. Suddenly, remembered the letter from last night that she wrote to herself, remembering at the eve of the war, Mo Bingxian squeeze her hand tightly under the peach blossom tree and said: Don’t hate, and never give up the chance of happiness. Believe me, as long as you have the heart, nothing in this world can’t be irreparable.
Don’t hate? Although she promised him at that time, in the end, she still hated Bai Zihua.
However, after all these years watching Bai Zihua has suffered living worse than death, thinking of her days and nights. Now come to think about it, she felt as if needles were pricking her heart. It turned out she has let go of hatred long before she even realized it, and only regret left.
How could she stand seeing him suffer in pain all the time, but there is no way to lift the curse that she made out of desperate revenge. All she can do now is to do her best to accompany him, using the end of time to redeem her fault.
She knew after Bai Zihua experiened the most terrible feeling of losing her at that time, and all these years of yearning, he was finally able to really face it all. Because she heard it, heard what he said before she left. He said sorry, then lowered his head and whispered silently: “Don’t go” —— He doesn’t need to apologize for what happened in the past and doesn’t need to make any promises for the future, only a word don’t go is enough to keep her.
When Hua Qiangu hurriedly took Tangbao back to Cloud Mountain, Bai Zihua is nowhere to be seen, leaving only the humming beast. She tried to use the magic to track his whereabouts still couldn’t find him. It was like he has completely disappeared from the world. But he can’t be harmed or destroyed, can’t enter the yellow spring or the nether world, so where can he go?
Another round of searching around the world, she finally found him at the bottom of Changliu sea. It took a lot of effort to get into the confined space since she lost all her demon god power, and her body was not fully recovered. As a result, she was feeling dizzy at the moment, almost could not stand steadily.
Bai Zihua was floating and sleeping soundlessly in the blue water. It was just like It’s
when she found him was poisoned sleeping under the sea in the Eastern Sea.
Looking at the wine jars on the side, Hua Qiangu felt funny and distress at the same time. Bai Zihua is indeed can’t be harmed or destroyed, but he can get drunk. He drank so much of Forgetfulness wine mixing with Dreamy Death pill, it is enough for him to sleep for hundreds of years.
He thought that she left him forever, feeling like dying and over-exhausted, so using this method sleeping under the depth of the sea to avoid it? Tired of living but can’t die, it turned out she is the cruelest one. She ruined him with her own hand, and now how can she has the heart to leave him again?
She caresses Bai Zihua’s icy cheeks in distress, using her power to eliminate the influence of the Dreamy death pill, and the toxication of Forgetfulness wine.
Hua Qiangu then sitting quietly beside him, while staring at him and sometimes has a little talk with Tangbao. From time to time listened to the hustle and bustle noise of Mt Changliu. Until a whole month later, Bai Zihua finally woke up from his drunken dreams.
The moment he blinked his eyes, he saw Hua Qiangu was there, he thought himself was still dreaming. This time his scar is not hurt but his chest is feeling stuffy and painful.
Why wake him up?
The tipsy feeling from the wine hasn’t completely gone yet. He frowned slightly and seemed to be angry. His thin lips gently moved and his pupils flashed brightly as if the Milky way, making one almost intoxicated in his deep eyes.
Hua Qiangu has never seen him in such a drunken state before, it was also some sort of provocative feeling within his ice-cold, like the peach blossom in the first snow, a breathtaking beauty. Hua Qiangu didn’t even dare to let out her breath, and hurriedly shifted her face, but her chin suddenly was hooked by him.
“Xiao Gu, call shifu….”
“Shifu….” She had no choice but to obediently called him.
“Good, call again.”
“Shifu….”
“Call one more time.”
“Shifu….”
…….after repeatedly saying it several dozens of times and that person seems to be still unsatisfied, he half narrowed his eyes and enjoyed listening to her over and over again calling him.
“Shifu, shifu, shifu, shifu, shifu…..”
There was not the least bit of impatience, Hua Qiangu repeatedly calling him, each called brought back every little bit of the joy and pain from the past, her voice changes from dull to rapid, from soft to shouting, knowing the tears are all over her face…. soo much love in her heart, so much regret, with the sounds calling Shifu filling the air. There were also some grievances, doubts, unwillingness, and resentment within her voice, It’s like a confession, asking, and venting at the same time. Looking at her big dropped of hot tears falling down, Bai Zihua’s heart felt like being torn apart and tightly huddled together, and then was dug into a hole. He bent down and embraced her delicate and fragile body into his arms as if he wanted to imprint her body into his. While stroking her hair, he kissed her forehead, kissed her tears.
“I thought you were gone and never come back….”
“I promised Shifu that I will never leave you.” Even though at that time she hasn’t recovered her memory yet, but her words are still counted! She doesn’t want to be a demon god, doesn’t want to be anyone’s bride. She doesn’t want anything, she just wants to be his good disciple that full of kindness and filial piety to him forever whether at the Unfeeling Hall or at the Cloud mountain.
Bai Zihua held her face and looked at her with joy, without hesitation he bent down to kiss her lips, kissing her passionately.
Hua Qiangu was stunned, it took her a long time to react. She couldn’t help but cry with joy, wrapped her arms around him and clumsily responding to his kiss.
Shifu’s lips are still cold as before, with a fragrance of Forgetfulness wine, making her feeling so intoxicating. Her brain was blank, under the deep water, her heart seems to be floating to the sky. Everything in my memory is set with a wonderful silver edge, the pain and persistent resentment from the past completely vanished.
It felt as if hundreds of years have passed. Suddenly feeling someone is approaching here, Bai Zihua released a low sigh and leaves her lips. The long-awaited of her soft lips was almost beyond his control.
Hua Qiangu was a little afraid after and caress his left arm in worried, but her hand was instead held by Bai Zihua.
“Xiao Gu, I know what I am doing. I am sober.”
Hua Qiangu stared at him with tears, such a scene she didn’t dare to think about it before, her heart being overwhelmed by it.
“Silly girl, why are you crying nonstop?” Bai Zihua stretched out his hand and gently wipe away her tears. Is it because she couldn’t cry in her previous life, and has accumulated so much pain so now she turned out to be a girl who likes to cry?
“Shifu—— Honorable Master——” A called came from afar. Bai Zihua waves his hand and the enchantment broke instantly. Hua Qiangu looked up and saw You Ruo and her group coming, but she didn’t know why there was also a monk followed behind her.
In the beginning, Tangbao laughing on the side while covering her eyes and peeping, but when she saw Luo Shiyi, she snorted with rage and crawled into Hua Qiangu’s ear.
“You Ruo?”
“Shifu…..”Tears and nasal began to come out from You Ruo’s eyes and nose. Shifu Gu Tuo finally recovered her memory. She recognized me! With deep affectionate she rushed forward wanted to plunge her head into shifu’s arms, preparing all the complaint in her head going to tell shiful how Honorable Master has bullied her over the years, but she didn’t expect that Hua Qiangu’s open arms suddenly changed direction and hugged the little monk next to her.
Everyone was stunned, You Ruo was so shocked that her jaw almost dropped. No way, Shifu has already had Honorable Master, does she want to snatch this monk from her as well?
Yan Yue was also frightened and hurriedly pushed her away.
“Benefactor, men, and women should not have close contact. Amituofu….” Why do the women I met recently to become more beautiful and more open?
Hua Qiangu clung to his lapel tightly and stroked the beads on his wrist. She choked with sobs: “Xiao Yue, really is you …”
Yan Yue saw her being like this, there was a sudden pain in his heart.
“Amituofu, benefactor, you ‘ve got the wrong person.”
A few people next to him came to a realization after they heard Hua Qiangu remarked. You Ruo thought to herself with a silly smiled: Fortunately, Shifu is not going to rob this monk from her, otherwise she really doesn’t know what she should do. These days, in order to keep him she has used all sorts of reasons, gradually get along with each other, and the feeling was already deep.
Hua Qiangu turned to look at Bai Zihua. Bai Zihua smiled and nodded lightly, giving her confirmation. He then took her to the side.
“Xiao Gu, take your time, the days are long, don’t scare the monk.”
The evil side of the demon God has been incinerated and removed on the wooden poll, leaving behind the simple and kind Nan Wuyue taught that has been taught by Hua Qiangu. Only that his personality now is a bit stubborn and conservative, wholeheartedly dedicated himself to Buddha, it was like herself before, she is afraid that it would be hard for You Ruo to break through, there will be a long way to go in the future.
“Why are you guys here?” Hua Qiangu was so excited seeing so many familiar faces again.
You Ruo grinning, lifting her feet and pushed the humming beast to the front: “Through my dauntless and persistent efforts, today, I went to Cloud Mountain again and didn’t expect that the Cloud Mountain’s enchantment was broken. The place was empty, no one was there except the humming beast. I am afraid that both of you ran into an accident, so the humming beast brought us to look for you. I didn’t expect you are at Changliu seabed under my nose the whole time.”
Hua Qiangu smiled and nodded, pulling Tangbao out from her ear.
“Tangbao, stop hiding, come out and see humming beast that I mentioned to you before. By the way, Senior brother Shiyi is also here. Don’t you want to see him?”
Tangbao is completely uninterested in the pig-like animal on the ground. She snorted: Gu Tuo’s love can only belong to her, how could an ugly demon beast that can’t even speak dare to share with her! When she looked at Luo Shiyi, she’s even too lazy to hum, and directly went into Hua Qiangu’s bosom. She doesn’t know him, doesn’t know the person who only listened to the teacher’s ordered and prevented her from saving Gu Tuo. Most importantly, this stinky man stood on the side watching her being bullied by Ni Mantian!
Luo Shiyi who was being stared in rejected by her, the joy and excitement at the first sight suddenly turned to misery, that bug hates him, but why….
Hua Qiangu suddenly pulled Tangbao out and threw her into Luo Shiyi’s palm.
“Tangbao, Senior brother Shiyi was for you… after all, you know everything you should forgive him. Senior brother Shiyi, please take care of Tangbao in the future.”
Luo Shiyi was overwhelmed by unexpected favor and honor, he hurried nodded. He held Tangbao in his palms like holding the most precious treasure in the world, but Tangbao took his finger and bit it hard, Luo Shiyi resisted it and let her vent all her anger.
Huo Xi openly laughed with a high-spirited: “Now we are finally reunited!”
Qingliu and Wu Qingluo shook their heads: “Unfortunately, Shuofeng and Qingshui are gone.”
Bai Zihua spoke: “Qingshui and Xuan Yuanlang have three lives times of marriage fate, now they should be at the Immortal Realms spending their days together happily. Don’t need to worry about them.”
Hua Qiangu nodded: “Previously, I have already arranged Shuofeng. In a hundred years’ time, we will be able to see him again.”
Bai Zihua senses someone is coming, he could tell who that person is, so he quickly told Hua Qiangu: “Xiao Gu, There will be many opportunities to get together again in the future. Let’s go back to Cloud Mountain first.”
You Ruo grabbed hold of Bai Zihua: “Honorable Master, don’t leave, please return to the Unfeeling Hall. The Three Heads Honorable position of Changliu can’t do with one missing!” The most important thing is that the sect leader position of hers is too much work.
Huo Xi and the rests are also quickly helped out: “Honorable Master, you and Qiangu please return with us, Shibo (Moyan) and Shifu (Sheng Xiaomu), they miss you very much. The Unfeeling Hall has always empty, Shibo often goes alone to clean up, and quietly sit there for a whole day. Can’t you forgive him and forgive us?”
Bai Zihua did not speak, just looking at the surface direction, as expected the people coming are Mo Yan and Sheng Xiaomu.
“I wondered why it is so noisy under Changliu seafloor today, it turned out Senior Brother has returned. Why aren’t you squatting here? You are already at the home door, why don’t go back for a seat?” Sheng Xiaomu gazed at Bai Zihua and Hua Qiangu who has recovered her memory yet still chose to let go of everything and be willing to stay with him forever. Sheng Xiaomu breathed out a big sigh of relief. In the past few years, he did not know how many times he tried to convince him to go back to the Unfeeling Hall with Xiaogu. Eldest Senior Brother has already known his mistakes and very regretful for it, but Bai Zihua still refused. He doesn’t know if it is because he has no way to forgive Eldest Senior Brother for his scheme at that time, or unable to forgive himself for personally killed Hua Qiangu for the sake of Changliu.
Over the years, Mo Yan’s appearance is much looser and less stone cold. Zhu Ran’s death was a big blow for him, a few white hairs were added to the sideburns. Affairs in the world are so ridiculous, the reincarnation of heavens law, people who have vanished in the past, one by one appeared in front of him. The real souls and spirits vanished into dust, will never return. There is only Zhu Ran, that silly child, who always selfish and unexpectedly sacrifices himself for others.
Hua Qiangu feeling sad all of a sudden as she looked at him and reminded her of Zhu Ran. She never thought that the one that changed everything, saving her life, and giving her the opportunity to return to shifu’s side is Zhu Ran…..
Mo Yan looked at Bai Zihua and then shifted his gaze at Hua Qiangu. He wants to persuade Bai Zihua to stay, but in the end, he was able to squeeze out only two words: “Junior Brother…”
Bai Zihua naturally understood his meaning, but the memory of the illusion of Mt Changliu went into annihilation still stuck in his mind, and afterward, he ruthlessly used Xuanyuan sword stabbed her……he suddenly felt a sharp pain in his chest, barely able to stand.
“Shifu…..” Hua Qiangu took his hand: “Let’s go back to the Unfeeling Hall!”
Bai Zihua looked at her with surprise. Isn’t the person who should mind the most is her? For the sake of Changliu, he hurt her again and again and ultimately killed her!
Hua Qiangu fixed her gazed at his clear bright eyes: “Shifu, let’s go back. Everyone at Mount Changliu needs you as much as I do. The Unfeeling Hall has the most beautiful memories of my life, I miss that place very much. And it’s not easy to reunite, I want to be with everyone all the time, don’t want to be too far apart. The most important thing is, I want to be the most important person to Shifu, but not your everything. The entrust of Great grandmaster to you, your responsibility for Changliu and all living beings, these you can’t be shirked or let down, don’t give up because of me. Changliu is your home, your root, and it used to be your everything. In the past, Shifu was alone, but you never felt lonely, it was because you have things to do. But during all these years at Cloud Mountain, you didn’t have a day that you are truly happy. I know Shifu has always thought about this place, otherwise, you would not choose to come to the Changliu seafloor and sleep here escaping from everything. Shifu, let’s go back. Love and righteousness can be both. Xiao Gu wants to know after all these years if the peach blossoms at the Unfeeling Hall still blooming…..”
Bai Zihua held her hand tightly, for a while he did not know what to say. After a long time, he finally nodded lightly. Even she can do it, how can he not let go.
Everyone was almost cheering from excitement, and even Mo Yan couldn’t help but smile lightly.
“Let’s hurry back, today is Changliu Sword Festival. Just in time to go back together to celebrate and have a big meal for this reunion!” You Ruo rubbing her hands excitedly. All these years she always ranked number one at catching the rolling fish.
Everyone nodded and gets ready to fly up together, but Hua Qiangu suddenly slipped.
“Xiao Gu, what’s wrong?” Bai Zihua looked at her nervously.
“Nothing. Shifu, I am tired, you hold me.”
You Ruo squeezing her eyes on the side. Shifu is so mischievous, just reconciled with Honorable Master and now already learned to be spoiled.
Bai Zihua looked at the people around who are secretly peeking at both of them. It’s not like he never holds her before in front of many people, but at that time his mind didn’t think of anything so he didn’t feel it. But now because he is being honest about his heart, it’s unavoidable to feel a little awkward. Yet, without any hesitation, he picked her up and carried her around his arms, followed the group flew to the Unfeeling Hall.
Eight thousand disciples are about to start the Sword Festival, but when they realize that the Sect leader, Honorable Superior (Moyan), Honorable Scholar (Sheng Xiaomu), even Luo Shiyi, Huo Xi, and Wu Qingluo, all suddenly disappeared for no reason, no one is in charge of the overall situation and it became a bit messy. At that moment, they saw Bai Zihua came back carrying Hua Qiangu in his embrace, the whole audience was stunned for a few seconds, And then made the earth-shaking cheers.
You Ruo is the happiest person here: “Shifu, now that you’re back, you can finally teach me the magic spells!”
“You Ruo…..”
Hua Qiangu looked at her feeling a little ashamed. She’s not a good teacher, hasn’t officially taught her even once, and only makes this disciple of hers worried about her instead. She hopes that in the future she can slowly make up, but she’s afraid that… a flashed of worried appeared between her eyebrows. She then changed into a smiling face looking at the familiar Mount Changliu, smiling at the Unfeeling Hall floating in the air. Her eyes dimmed with tears …..all the disciples are kneeling on the floor and shouted ‘Honorable Master’ in unison.
You Ruo burst into hearty laughed: “Honorable Master, you should take back your Sect Leader position. That’s what we all want. All these years, Changliu has been left into a mess by me. We are all looking forward to your return.”
Bai Zihua shook his head. During these past few years watching You Run went to Cloud Mountain nonstop, using all sorts of tricks, he could tell she is tough and unyielding. She definitely is able to take charge of Changliu. And today’s Changliu compared to the strict rules and very conservative before has become more relaxed. The elders of the Twelve Pavilions must have no way to deal with her mischievous.
After coordinated Hua Qiangu to sit down, next is the grand ceremony of Sword Festival, followed by entertainment activities, everyone scattered around and played happily.
After playing for a while, Hua Qiangu began to feel out of breath. She wiped her sweat with a smile on her face: “Let’s go to Unfeeling Hall together, I’ll cook some good dishes for everyone…..”
She hopes that from now on the Unfeeling Hall will always be lively, everyone can casually come to visit. Bai Zihua understood her intention, he nodded lightly.
With such a big push, countless new and old disciples are all excited and can’t wait to see the legendary Unfeeling Hall that they have been yearning for a long time.
Looking at the still unchanged scenery, everything remains the same. Bai Zihua patted her head: “Don’t cry….”
Hua Qiangu quickly wiped away her tears. That’s right, today is the happiest day of all these years, she shouldn’t cry! Rolled up her sleeves and started working in the kitchen. You Ruo and a bunch of people are rushing to help her. Soon after, small pots of freshly cooked food are ready.
At night, next to the creek, under the peach tree, the bonfire burned.
Hua Qiangu felt that the laughter she made today is more than all the laughter of all the years since the day Shifu was poisoned.
Next to the bonfire, You Ruo is trying to instigate Xiaoyue to drink wine and eat meat, took advantage of being tipsy from the wine gets her hands on him, freaking out Xiao Ye and kept chanting Amitabha. By the creek, Huo Qi and Wu Qingluo are flirting with each other while admiring the moon and occasionally heard Huo Qi shrill cries. As for Luo Shiyi, he is laying on the grass talking to Tangbao. Tangbao rolled her eyes at him and eats a peach that he just offered to her as a treasure, but she still giving him attitude.
Mo Yan was drinking quietly watching the many disciples around, a rare expression of gentleness and affectionate appeared on his face. Sheng Xiaomu lazily leaning under the peach tree, Feeling a little tipsy, he began to doze off.
Hua Qiangu beamed with pleasure, the perfect picture in front of her is full of warm yellow glow, and then slowly blur, as if there is a layer of water rippling on the surface, with golden glittering.
Qingliu walked over to her and handed her a glass of wine, persuaded her to drink a little too. Hua Qiangu smiled and reached out her hand, but she didn’t expect her fingers to slip by the side of the wine cup and miss receiving it. The colorful glass cup smashed on the ground with a bang.
There was a sudden silence around, and everyone turned to look at her.
Hua Qiangu hurriedly bent down to pick up the broken pieces of the cup, but her fingers were accidentally cut.
That person froze: “I am Shiyi.”
Hua Qiangu looked up and seeing her surroundings is getting more and more blurry. She couldn’t even see the outline, only left with color blocks. She couldn’t help but shakes her head and smiled.
You Ruo held her hand in panicked: “Shifu, what happened to your eyes?!!”
Hua Qiangu patted her head, comforting her: “I am fine, just feeling a little dizzy.”
Bai Zihua who was watching her quietly the whole time, has already knew what is going on. Throughout the years of his and Sha Qiangmu’s effort, even her mortal souls have returned but her immortal souls are still chaotic and incomplete, causing her to be dull-witted. Even with the help of elixir pills, it can’t restore her souls to be perfect like before. Their efforts over the years could only transfer her mortal souls into immortals souls. But there was a side effect of having her memories restored, her body will get damage.
Before, she felt tired as she lost all her magic power, and could not do sword fly. Now we lost her vision, after that she will start losing her hearing and ability to speak. The current her without magic power, she won’t be able to use her inner voice to talk…..and can only be the same as a blind and deaf normal human who loses five senses.
“Xiao Gu, don’t be afraid, it won’t spend too much time, Shifu will definitely can cure you.”
Hua Qiangu smiled and nodded. How can everything be perfect? She is able to return to the Unfeeling Hall, be with him, and reunited with everyone, it’s already good enough, she has no regrets.
Everyone started to gather around her. Tangbao whispered in her ears, and the humming beast rubbed against her feet back and forth. Bai Zihua hugged her from behind very tightly, like the most solid wall in the world.
“This time, you will not be left alone like in the Savage of wilderness, Shifu will always be with you. From now on, there will only be happiness in your life. Therefore, don’t be afraid, even you can’t hear, can’t see, and can’t talk, as long as you use your heart to feel, you will realize that Shifu is always by your side, never leave.”
Hua Qiangu’s nose turned sour and nodded desperately. She then turned around to face Bai Zihua. In an instant, there seemed to be lightning illuminating the night sky, letting her see the gentle and firm face clearly.
“I was never once to believe in good, evil, or to believe in happiness, but I want to tell you, Shifu, I…..”
The words ‘I love you’ that she tried to say were blocked by him times again and again, but this time she suddenly felt the darkness in front of her, and her voice could not make any sound. She can only meditate repeatedly saying it in her heart, she knew he could hear it!
The world is slowly quieting down, and everything is silent. However, in the vagueness, the joyful laughter of the people seems to have not yet receded, and the sound of the bell pendant, as well as the gentle words from Bai Zihua, still echoed in her ears for a long time.