The Male Lead Is Obsessed With Proposing to Me - Chapter 22

Benelucia spoke as though he knew her mother’s character well.

It was strange as Senelia’s ex-lover had never once shown any interest in her parents.

“I’m sorry, Sally.”

This time, he apologized first. It was the first time he had ever sincerely apologized to her.

“…Huh?”

Senelia immediately shut her mouth and stared at Benelucia. His actions, in her opinion, were entirely incomprehensible.

There was only one thing Senelia wished to gain from the Grand Duke. It was for him to realize his need for her and place her by his side, to not throw her away. That was enough. She wouldn’t ask for more.

Why is this arrogant apologizing to me?

Senelia could not understand him.

“If I had been engaged to you earlier, the Viscount would not have needed to visit you in the Capital.”

His words were like a hammer thrown at head. She even thought she could feel a part of her tingling.

“I guess that even the Viscountess might not welcome me because of that… Judging by your reaction, it seems my estimation was correct.”

He spoke smoothly, he didn’t even realize how much his words cut through Senelia.

“I’ll repay you right now.”

The Grand Duke hurriedly approached his ex-lover. With each word he spoke, Senelia grew increasingly nervous.

First, he said he was sorry, and now, he wanted to offer compensation.

As though he wanted to somehow free the burden in Senelia’s heart.

Though, Benelucia’s intentions were precisely the beginning that would… It activated Senelia’s wrath.

“A… Reward?”

Her words were honed, sharp and deadly. She struggled to suppress herself. Alas, a ferocious urging surged through her heart.

She could still clearly remember the emotions felt when she heard the obituary speech of the Viscountess Daphnen, still remembered the guilt that weighed her down.

Ha. To me… I… Father. I made you die in remorse.  

For the duration of travel taken for Senelia to reach the warp gate, the thought of her father held her in a vise.

She hadn’t even found a moment in which she felt it was acceptable for her to cry.

The Viscount had died on his way to help his daughter. He must have struggled with the thought that his daughter had eventually been abandoned.

Even though Senelia remembered her previous life, she was still Senelia.

She was born in this world. She was raised in this world. Viscount Daphnen was never not her father. Therefore… Her father’s death was a wound in her heart.

And due to that, she could understand the pain her mother was going through. The mother who had begun to hate her.

And you want to compensate me for that?

Who, what, how and why? Is this wretchedness something you can compensate for?

Her hands trembled. She hoped with her entire being that Benelucia would not open his mouth again.

“Let’s get married, Sally.”

[T/N: Meaning the poor man chooses death.]

However, as always, Benelucia rejected her earnest wishes.

“Then your parents-”

As soon as the word ‘parents’ left his lips, she couldn’t hold back any longer.

Pa.

The Grand Duke abruptly cut off. His head snapped to the side mercilessly. Senelia felt her palm tingle as it had recklessly connected with the man’s face.

“How… How, with that mouth, to my parents…”

She muttered as her temper exploded with her anger.

How can you compensate for my father’s death and my mother’s hatred using marriage? Can marrying you solve everything so easily? It doesn’t work like that!

Rage flared up within her in an instant. Arguably, it was the first time that Senelia felt it so difficult to endure in front of Benelucia.

“Sally, what…”

Such an arrogant man, who had never been slapped even during his worst partings with his lovers, seemed even more confused as it was the first time it happened to him. He looked at Senelia in confusion.

It was when their eyes met that something stronger overpowered Senelia’s wrath.

Survival Instinct.

It struck her like a thunderbolt, she had made a huge mistake.

“I have sinned, I deserve death!”

She crumpled to the ground and kneeled with her head flushed to the floor.

How have you been living all these years, Senelia… How can I still not control my emotions and turn these eight years spent in vain. 

No… How, how could I?

Her father’s death was tragic, and her mother’s hatred was painful.

Nevertheless, Senelia spent eight years there.

Eight years spent at Cliff’s side, acting like a dog.

Eight years of falling in love with Benelucia.

The weight of her error doused her anger instantly.

Extreme fear followed her overwhelming anger. As a result, Senelia could feel herself going insane.

Contrary to her usual vigilance, just by slapping the Grand Duke and then suddenly prostrating to apologize was enough to prove her dive into insanity.

“I have committed blasphemy! Laying a hand on the royal family, my family and I will be condemned…”

It was a habit she had developed. In the midst of her frenzy, Senelia would begin to immediately offer apologies one after another.

But her apologies ended there.

“Stop!”

Because Benelucia’s furious order interrupted her.

***

Benelucia had dared to be overconfident.

I can give Senelia compensation.

He was a Grand Duke, what did he not have? He was ready to give Senelia whatever her heart desired.

So, it had never occurred to him that he would not be able to compensate her for what he had done. For the sorrows she had suffered.

Pa.

“How… How, with that mouth, to my parents…”

When Senelia’s palm connected with his face, Benelucia had not been angered. He just couldn’t believe it.

You must understand, he had never expected his Senelia to react like that.

It was only later when he came to the realization that maybe she would not want compensation.

But before he could ask, Senelia had fallen to her knees. She so easily lowered her head, like an infinitely low-born person.

“I have committed blasphemy!”

The second she had uttered that phrase, the Grand Duke’s mood plummeted.

Senelia was succumbing to her duty. Unlike himself, she had not forgotten that her relationship with Benelucia was a Viscount’s Young Lady and the Grand Duke.

No, I… Has she ever forgotten?

“Laying a hand on the royal family, my family and I will be condemned…”

Her next words resulted in Benelucia losing control of his expression.

“Stop!”

He gritted his teeth and shouted. In her head, he could estimate exactly how badly she thought of him, she didn’t even try to make excuses for herself or her family.

And the fact that the woman he loved felt that way would not be pleasing to even the worst of men. “Get up now. Don’t kneel before me, what the hell are you…”

Swallowing a sigh, Benelucia lowered himself and lifted Senelia up. His emotions flowed through him intensely, ready to burst out.

If I had taken Senelia as my fiancée earlier, I wouldn’t have to watch the woman I love kneel for slapping me in the face.

It was an unreasonable idea for a member of the Imperial family such as Benelucia. But he was but a man who had finally realized his love and could see nothing but that love.

In addition to that, he had the body of a sword master, so, when he was hit on the cheek, it left no scratches or bruises. On the contrary, only the palm Senelia used to hit him was red. He was rather sorry for that.

“I will not be doing anything to you or your family. So, stop that.”

Benelucia comforted Senelia as she trembled in surprise at his actions.

He tightened his grip on her in his arms and headed to the couch.

“Majesty!”

Startled, she grabbed his shoulder, Senelia felt that it was impossible to keep up with the flow of the situation.

“Please put me down, my Lord and I are too close. Your Majesty-”

“Sally, shut up,”

Benelucia unwittingly revealed a glimpse of his hurt feelings.

My Lord and I, not us. 

It was unpleasant to hear that his lover was uncomfortable in his arms and even spat out words that held a sense of distance.

Her body twitched at his unusually harsh voice and an awkward silence descended between the two of them.

With his thoughts in disarray, he snuggled Senelia up to the couch and sat beside her.

“Your forehead has turned red.”

“Your Majesty!”

Senelia went red because Benelucia gazed at her forehead and then casually knelt on one knee before her.

“Get up now, what if anyone sees…”

She was terrified, Cliff’s goons were everywhere.

Senelia was afraid of his reaction if word reached the emperor’s ears.

Cliff de Helios wanted Senelia to be his younger brother’s leash, but he did not want her to wield him.

Even the emperor knew that Senelia didn’t have any good feelings towards himself.

And yet, Cliff would beat her up purely since he was aware that Senelia, his dog, did not have the courage to get revenge.

Nevertheless, the emperor remained secretly wary of Senelia.

The emperor basically distrusted all humans and believed that they were fickle enough to change at any given time.

In such a situation, she was terrified of how the emperor would react when he heard that the proud Benelucia, his baby brother, had bowed to Senelia, his loyal dog.

Unfortunately, Senelia could not speak a word of that to Benelucia, so Benelucia did not know what was going on with her.

The Grand Duke, on the other hand, was frustrated with Senelia, who was always so careful around him.

Excluding the first two years when their relationship was ambiguous, Senelia had been constant, even though she had stayed as the Grand Duke’s lover for six years.

She is always cautious and never takes care of herself.

“Is that the problem now?”

Benelucia signed and continued his actions.  hhh