The Saint’s Dungeon Business - Chapter 2

The Saint’s Dungeon Affairs – 2

[NSFW]

Guwon, who spent his entire school break inside the capsule forgetting the real world, finally went outdoors.

Needless to say, he went out to buy a  virtual reality game. Today is the release date of a new game from Great Earth he adores. It is an era where all parcels are sent via drones within an hour of the order on the internet. But with the mindset that a real fan wouldn’t meaninglessly waste that time, he went to his favorite shop, near his house, right at the opening time.

Adult games are often either so-called ‘nukige’ that focuses too much on sex, or adult games that emphasize the process too much, which features unrealistic, sugary dating that you spend time  facing or holding hands that ends right before the real deal. Once in a blue moon when an adult game has RPG or Simulation features added, they either have weak points in sexual features or gaming experience.

And then this company, Great Earth, came out of nowhere and made great achievement of catching both hares – RPG elements and sexual content – with unique mechanics that no normal minds could have come up with, and gained overwhelming support from the gamers.

‘Sex at the Dungeon,’ a new game released just today with the slogan ‘You Adventurer, Fuck to Explore the Dungeon!’ is also an RPG-based adult game. Just like other games of Great Earth, its unique feature is the system that seemed to be designed out of mind.

Guwon already visited the official webpage so often that he felt every day was too long to wait and had a brief understanding of the universe and systems, and he was still reading  the user manual while the game was being installed for his philosophy that the manual too is a part of the game.

The universe that becomes the background of the game is a classic fantasy world that belongs to the Goddess of Earth who is in charge of earth, life, love, and infinite possibility. The problem is that this goddess of life and love must have had an overflowing attachment to her charges because she gave divine words that goes “My children, grow by having sex, the most direct expression of love that creates life!” and built an amazing system.

What system does it use? I guess there’s nothing to hide. You level up by having sex.

The slogan of the game, “You Adventurer, Fuck to Explore the Dungeon!” is not a metaphor but literally mean that you level up by having sex to explore the dungeon.

Anyways, in such a crazy universe, the main character living in a different world is thrown to the world, with the goal being reaching the end of the bottomless underground dungeon.

The reason the main character is being thrown to such a universe is quite perplexing as well.

This so-called goddess of earth, like I said earlier, is in charge of infinite possibilities as well, so she suggests many races to unite each other to give birth to new possibilities because she wants to see the damn possibility. What’s more is that this goddess of earth is a very high-ranking divine being among the others that are in charge of multiple dimensions, so she kidnaps beings of various races from other dimensions, throwing them in her dimension, to create such a situation that new possibilities can be born.

Then the setting is that this main character, knowing nothing, got caught by the evil hand of such naughty goddess.

Man, tell me more about Great Earth. They are out of their mind.

When they introduced the party system that the only male in a female party or the only female in a male party becomes the party leader as well as the healer was a hell of a system. The only method of healing was having sex in that game. And now they put their effort to meet the demand of the gamers who wanted to play various jobs and made an even crazier universe.

Guwon checked that the game had been installed while he was reading the manual, closed the capsule and started playing the game.

There wasn’t much to the opening cutscene.

Just a really divine and pretty goddess descended to the great temple, solemnly gave crazy words that goes “My children, grow by having sex, the most direct expression of love that creates life!” with such a divine voice. Then the world was absorbed with an intense light, then the character creation process began.

There wasn’t much to it: the base value of status and class was fixed, and the only thing I could edit was the character name and appearance.

The character name I chose was, like always, “Guwon,” which means Redemption.

In my childhood, I got mocked for my name Guwon which was the combination of unusual surname and given name so much I used to blame my parents. However it was a good nickname for characters so now I am satisfied with it as there was no need to spend a long time for my username.

And I didn’t change much of my appearance as well.

I gave myself a little bit more height as I was upset of not quite reaching 6”, increased body-leg ratio that was just about average, improved skin condition, changed facial appearance a bit, increased size of a muscle just enough.

If somebody who knows me passes by me and sees the avatar I just made, ten to one they will say “Guwon, don’t you and that character look strangely similar? That must hurt because that guy looks so much better.” So the shade of the original features are still there. I’d call that change ‘just a little.’

The start seemed to be delayed by a little bit too much, but I am satisfied with the result of pursuing perfection, as if Pygmalion possessed me.

When I was done with the customization, the world was absorbed by an intense light once again. With a light dizziness, I was standing in the middle of a street between medieval western buildings before I knew.

Me, Guwon, the commonly acknowledged gaming capsule-potato felt dizzy just for connecting to a virtual reality?

I know it was a light one but I feel uneasy about it. I shook my head hard hoping to shake the uneasiness off my body, and opened my status window out of habit.

Name: Guwon

Race: Human 24

Job: Saint* 1

Level: 1

HP : 200/200

Energy : 100/100

Strength: 10

Endurance: 10

Agility: 10

Stamina: 10

Intelligence: 10

Spirit: 10

Charm: 50

Bonus Stat: 0

Status: Normal

[* Saint can be also translated as Sex Man. It’s a pun]

In this universe, 10 for stat is an average value for an average adult male, and it was a typical stat for beginners.

It was odd to begin with 50 stats for charm, but I guess it’s Great Earth being considerate for users to have better early-game experience for such a universe.

What’s more unusual is my job, Saint, and this is the privilege and the identity of the player. It is a job unique for players the other npcs can never have, and it literally  gives bonus for sexual activities.

In such a universe where you level up by having sex, it is an alternative position for ‘Hero’ of other games that the main characters usually get.

I opened my inventory. 5 lesser potions and 5 silvers were all I could find. The equipment window doesn’t even exist.

Are you telling me to wear clothes myself since I’m playing a virtual game because you made it more realistic? There must be some advantages for not having limits for equipment, but that’s somewhat bothering.

All I am wearing was training clothing I was wearing in real life. They scanned the clothes I was wearing and made it as the beginning equipment; they’ve put a decent effort to present the setting that the main character is suddenly kidnapped.

The manual said the tutorial begins after registering to the Adventurers Guild.

I closed the system windows and looked around, soon to find the Adventurers Guild building right in front of me with a sign of a giant hawk soaring up the sky drawn on it.

At the Adventurers Guild, it was early in the morning and still a great number of adventurers were looking around the notice board that had densely filled the walls.

When I describe the scene in such a way, people may often picture rough men with smelly sweat; the job adventurer is basically a risky job that requires a decent level.

And in this universe, you level up by having sex. More precisely, you gain experience points and level up when your partner reaches a climax.

You get the picture now, yeah?

I’ll give you a hint; there are many cases of women who never experience orgasm in their life.

So, in this universe, the level of women is often overwhelmingly higher than men, and naturally the gender ratio of adventurers is overwhelmingly high. To add, the higher the level gets, the more attractive they usually are.

One of the factors that contributes to the amount of experience is the satisfaction when the partner reaches the climax. And normally the sexual satisfaction is greater when the partner is more attractive.

So this is a dirty lookism-oriented game where good-looking men and women have a high advantage of being high-level. No wonder why they gave additional initial stats for charm.

Conclusion is that the scene that unfolds before my eyes does not feature a muscular macho festival but full of amazing ladies with all sorts of charms who are sexy, beautiful, or cute; such a desirable scene cures mind, body, and eyes.

Great Earth. You know how to move people’s minds. For my life I will collect Great Earth’s games and nothing else.

Determined yet again, I walked toward the desk a guild guide was at. I really wanted to dive in the wave of beautiful ladies right away, but I got to do the tutorial first.

“Hello. What can I do for you?”

I didn’t know because she was hidden behind the adventurers; this guide lady is amazingly beautiful as well.

“I’d like to register myself as an Adventurer.”

“Sure, the registration fee is 2 Silvers. Please put your hand on this status paper to check your identity.”

I put my hand on the paper the guide lady handed me, and simple status information like name, job, level, status, and others appeared on the paper.

So that’s how they check my identity. Magics seem convenient.

“Oh my? Your job is Saint? I have never seen that before. And you are level 1… Of course you can register yourself as an adventurer, but it is a risky job. Is that fine?”

“Of course, beautiful lady. You are witnessing the beginning of the legend. And your name will be recorded as the guide who marked the beginning of the Saint Legend.”

“Alright. Just a moment please.”

I spitted out a weeaboo line that is only possible in a game with a wink. The guide lady couldn’t hide her aghast face, then in a moment it changed to a business smile.

She must be good at her job.

By the way, if I met a crazy person that can spit out the words I just said in real life, I wouldn’t even get as near as 50 meters to them. You don’t avoid shit on the ground because you’re scared of it.

“That is all done. Have a nice day.”

The guide lady smiled giving me a small metal plate with a size of a name card. This metal plate must be a kind of an identity card that appears like the paper I saw earlier.

Wait a moment, ‘have a nice day?’ Wasn’t she going to guide me about the basics of adventurers as a tutorial?

“Hey… uh… isn’t there anything more to tell me? about the basics, rules, anything? I don’t think we’re finished yet.”

“Goodbye.”

I tried re-entering the tutorial, and got bounced off the iron wall of the guide lady’s smile. That smile seemed to urge me to get lost, so Guwon had to retreat for now.

How could I possibly know some crazy words that would skip the tutorial? Didn’t they spend too much time on a mere guild guide AI?

Wait a minute, come to think of it, that guide lady is too pretty for a mere guild guide. Don’t tell me she was a heroine npc. Am I too late to go kneel down and beg for a guide?

“Hey, fish! Come here.”

While standing in the middle of the guild not knowing what to do, someone spoke to me.

By the line only, it was a typical line of ‘Bully A’ who gets wrecked by a newbie they were about to mock, but when I looked at the direction of the voice, there was a fairly beautiful lady standing there.

She had brown-skin, firm body-line, somewhat wild-looking face, typical warrior armor, and reddish hair that resembles leonine mane; she was a beautiful lady with the typical appearance of a sexy female warrior of a fantasy world.

“Level 1. Job level 1. You’re a cherry boy? What the fuck have you been doing until this age? Adventurer is not an easy job a cherry fucking boy can take. Go get some of your mother’s milk first.”

And her mouth was as dirty as she looked. It was so dirty that it almost damaged my steel-like mind.

I am not a cherry boy!

…at least not in VR!

A cherry boy? I fucked so much, many people would call me the sex master !

What did I do to deserve this?

Yeah, I did block some people by standing in the middle of the guild, but that was a bit too much!

Oh, I see! So the tutorial is not from the guide lady, but this lady.

Come to think of it, Great Earth’s games’ tutorials were usually at the beginning.

So you fuck in the tutorial, hit level 2, and get some guide for the system, so you wouldn’t suddenly fuck a guide lady doing her work even if the universe is already crazy.

Understood. Then there’s only one thing I have to say to this tutorial npc.

“Hah! Look at what this cunt is saying when the only thing you bitch can do is scream when I pierce you with my divine sword. Get lost and come back after getting some more semen juice.”

“What the fuck did you say? Follow me to the inn!”

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Author: I wrote as it pops up in my head.