The Simulacrum - Chapter 81~ Part 2

“Kihihi! Marvelous! Absolutely marvelous!”

“Master, you’re drooling again.”

It said something about how excited Fred was that he didn’t even bother to snap at the android standing next to him in her pajamas. I’d like to say I couldn’t blame him, but even I had to admit that the obsessed look he was giving to the pile of armors laid out on the table in front of him was a little creepy.

“You can inspect these, but make sure you don’t break anything,” I warned him, just to be sure.

“Kihihi! Don’t worry boss, I’ll be gentle.”

“Initializing disgust protocols.” Saying so, Galatea took two steps back, and even added a scorching “Ew.” She still didn’t get any reaction out of our resident mad scientist, so she turned to me with just a hint of a pout. “Grandmaster?”

“Yes,” I responded, against my better judgment. At this rate, another title was going to stick to me.

“How long can we keep these?”

“Two weeks at most, unless their owners do something stupid. If they cooperate, we’ll have to give these back before the Draconian conference, so make sure he doesn’t take them apart.”

“Understood. I request authorization for non-lethal take-down methods for restricting master’s movements if necessary.”

“Keep it in moderation.”

“Instructions noted. I will now resume my charging activities.”

Saying so, she turned on her heel and walked back into the bedroom area. By the way, apparently she was sleeping before I came back to the base with the Knights’ equipment. The more I knew of her, the more I had to wonder if she really was an android or just a really dedicated role-player. Though again, the arm-cannons spoke otherwise.

“Kihihi! Look, boss! These helmets have two different array sockets! This one even connects directly to this bow!” Fred exclaimed while waving a beaked helm and a large recurve bow entirely made out of metal. “Do you know what this means?”

“… Crosshairs?”

“I knew you’d get it!” The disheveled man grinned at me and let out a hearty chuckle. “I’ve been looking for a way to implement a targeting reticle for the Gigant Mark III! This is an amazing find!”

“Gigant Mark III?” I repeated after him with a frown. “I thought I was clear on the explicit ban on oversized robots.”

“Ah, don’t worry boss, it’s nothing like that! It’s just a side-project, no, a hobby I work on in my free time! It’s in a different league from the old Biomechanical Gigants. Much more aesthetically pleasing, I swear.”

Fred looked a little too frantic for my liking, but I wasn’t in the mood to get bogged down with this, so I told him, “I’ll be the judge of that. I’m going to give it a look on the weekend.”

“Erm… Okay. I’ll make sure the prototype is in presentable condition. It’s not blocky at all.”

That was another suspiciously specific denial, but I was getting tired of this, so I decided to drop the topic.

“I’ll go check on the Fauns and our new recruits. Keep up the good work, and remember: no disassembly in the name of science.”

“Got it, boss, but before you go…” I was just about to walk out, but turned on my heel to face him again. “You mentioned recruits, and that reminded me of something.”

“I’m listening.”

“You know, I’m used to working alone, but with so many things piling up, I was wondering if you could maybe hire some help in the workshop?”

“Depends. What do you have in mind?”

“Kihihi! You see, boss, I’d written a couple of letters and had uncle send them out to some of my alumni.” That made me raise a brow. I already knew he was sending letters to Peabody using Rinne as the messenger, but I didn’t think he was making contact with his Research Society buddies. He might’ve misunderstood my reaction, as he raised his hands in defense. “Don’t worry, I didn’t write anything specific. I just mentioned that there might be an opportunity here. You know, we kind of started out with the wrong foot, but we have a really sweet deal here. A secure environment, good food, no Assembly meddling, nearly unlimited funding, and so many amazing things to research! A year ago, I would’ve given a hand for a work environment like this, and I know a few people who would be jumping at the opportunity to work here.”

“How many are we talking about?”

“I… I don’t really know, to be honest. I sent messages to a dozen people I know, and they would probably bring their own research and assistants so… about thirty people?”

For a moment I was assaulted by the mental image of three dozen Freds cackling over a bunch of enchanted armors with bloodshot eyes, but I quickly shook it out of my head and told him, “So many people at once might be a bit too much, but I’m not against the idea. Let’s discuss the details later.”

“Kihihi! Got it, boss.”

I waited for a second to see if he had anything else to say, but my resident mad scientist returned to playing with the gear in front of him, so I left the workshop and returned to the main hall. In there, I found a gaggle of Fauns dressed in black, all huddled together near the armory area, so I made my way over there.

“Ah. Blackcloak,” Brang greeted me when I got closer, together with a customary salute, and the other Fauns also followed suit.

He was most likely refraining from using Faunish for the benefit of the people standing within their circle. One of them required no introduction, and when she noticed me, Mountain Girl turned to me and gave me a bow. The four women standing around her seemed a little perplexed at first, but quickly followed her example.

“Welcome back, Leonard-dono.”

“I see everyone’s gathered here,” I noted, and she gave me an energetic nod. In the meantime, I looked over the newcomers, and they all stood at attention at once.

How should I put this? They looked kind of silly. It wasn’t their fault though; they simply embodied the stereotypical female ninja look to a tee, and it was preposterously impractical in the flesh. The four of them all had similar, excessively curvy physiques, and the loose Japanese robes they were wearing barely reached below their butts while also leaving their cleavages in full view. They also wore cloth masks that covered everything under their eyes, headbands, and arm guards, but nothing else in terms of defensive gear. Oh, and fishnets. Both on their arms, their legs, and even more bafflingly, on their exposed chests. At least they weren’t colour coded, as their outfits were all the same dark purple as Rinne’s pantsuit.

Speaking of our resident huntress, I turned to her and gestured towards the small group. It took her a while to understand what I wanted, but then her eyes lit up and she took a step to the side. As if they rehearsed it ahead of time, the four took their masks off and fell to one knee. Now that I could take a better look at them, they were a little younger than I originally thought, all four of them were generic placeholder-pretty and, curiously, only one of them was Asian. So… was the Kage clan a multicultural Japanese monster-hunting ninja organization?

“We greet the clan head,” the four of them exclaimed at once, and I only just realized that Rinne misunderstood my gesture, so I had no choice but to voice my intent.

“I was told you only arrived a few days ago. Welcome to the island. Now, Rinne, would you care to properly introduce them?”

“At once!” Declaring so, Mountain Girl waved in their direction. “I present you the Danzo squad of the Kage clan.”

That… really didn’t tell me much, but before I could ask for clarification, the four took out their single-edged daggers in unison and placed them on the ground in front of them.

“We pledge our loyalty to the clan head!”

Suddenly everyone’s eyes were glued to me, and I had a feeling I was supposed to say something here, so I quickly searched my dusty mental cabinets for something suitable.

“Erm… Thank you, and thank you for your hard work during today’s operation.” My response was apparently acceptable, as their faces lit up at once. In fact, I could practically see the sparkles in their eyes, so I quickly moved the conversation along before I’d stumble into some kind of shenanigans. “Rinne?”

“Yes, Leonard-dono?”

“Are they all the forces of the Kage clan on the island?”

“No, of course not,” she stated like I just asked something silly. “They are the combat squad. Together with the reconnaissance and support squads, there are over twenty of your subordinates in the city.”

“Twenty,” I repeated after her, and let out a sigh. “One of these days, we might have to expand the secret base.” I’ve got a few odd looks for that comment, so I waved my hand and added, “Never mind. I see that you’re in the middle of introductions. Continue as you were.”

The four ninja girls took my stray comment as a command and rose to their feet at once. However, instead of introducing themselves to me, they proceeded to walk up to the Fauns and talk to them. I wanted to mingle a little to at least learn their names, but my efforts were quickly thwarted by Mountain Girl and Brang intercepting me.

“I report the situation,” the old Faun said with a satisfied smile. “Battle, success. No casualties. Hrul cut, not deep. Needs more training.”

“On our side, we have also completed the mission assigned to us. We collected all the documents and equipment before the local lord’s men arrived at the scene, and placed them in the warehouse, as instructed.”

“Good job, both of you,” I said with a slight smile. “I’m especially happy that you managed to do it without any serious injuries on either side.”

“Naturally. Battle was simple. One-sided.” the Faun general noted, and Rinne nodded along.

“I agree. We greatly outnumbered our opponents, and with the help of Leonard-san’s father and the girl with the many hands, they stood no chance. It was too easy.”

“Never complain about that. Our preparations were simply more than adequate, that’s all.” She still looked a little unsatisfied, so I decided to send her on an errand to clear her mind. “Did you find a girl’s school uniform among the items you recovered?”

“Yes, yes we did. Do you require it?”

“Please bring it here. I need to return it to its owner, or she won’t be able to attend school.”

“At your command!”

Brang and I watched as the suddenly re-energized woman dashed past the group, and she soon disappeared behind one of the doors leading out of the main hall.

“[Thine retainer remains peculiar as ever,]” he noted.

“[So it appears I’m not the sole person who shares such sentiments.]”

The old Faun let out a soft chuckle and looked over the four ninjas desperately trying to make small talks with the Fauns in the background.

“[Thine following swells by the day, Blackcloak. Imagining my old liege’s expression upon discovering how thine actions have shaped the face of the island in his absence fills me with a sense of expectation.]”

“[Bridle back all such contemplations, general, for the unworthy one whose name is a dusky bird of carrion shall remain in the bowels of the Abyss for a period of immense length. I have personally seen to that effect.]” Brang looked really curious about what I meant by that, so I told him, “[By my hand I inscribed a crimson note of challenge upon the chamber housing his nexus of power. He shall remain eminently engaged for the span within the glint of the oracle’s eyes.]”

He gave me a skeptical glance, but before he could raise another question, Rinne came back. She ran up to me and immediately presented me with a pile of neatly folded clothes.

“I have fulfilled the mission.”

“It wasn’t exactly a mission, but thanks.” I took the school uniform from her, consciously avoiding looking at the panda-print panties on top of the pile for any longer than strictly necessary, and said, “I think I’ve been away long enough to uphold my cover. I’ll deliver these, but I don’t think I’m going to come back here tonight. Please arrange accommodations for those four.”

“As you command,” Brang answered with a salute, and for some reason, Rinne tried to imitate him. That was odd, but not enough to question it, so I bid my farewells and walked over to the room with the teleport closet.

It fell out of use as of late, as I only needed to use this part of the base when I was Phasing the gang back and forth for training sessions. I still tried to keep appearances up with them, but since both Rinne, the Fauns, and the science duo were aware of my teleporting ability already, I usually just Phased in and out of the place when I was alone. This time we had newbies around, so I figured I’d be a bit more discreet, and teleport away from a place out of sight.

Speaking of newcomers, if I had a feeling that if this keeps up, I’ll really have to expand the base. I didn’t even know if it could be done, but I’d bet if I asked Fred, he’d have about seven different solutions for the problem.

I’ll have to make space for the Kage clan, the potential new recruits from the Research Society would also require places to live, feeding this many people would require the cafeteria to be refurbished, if things work out we would potentially need some kind of headquarters for the Knights, and—

Wait. Hold on for a moment. A secret base, with scary minions, mad scientists, killer robots, and now even actual, honest-to-goodness ninjas.

If this keeps going on, this place is going to turn into a villain lair from an old campy spy movie! And then what would that make me? The last thing I’d need right now is secret agents with numerical code names snooping around the place. But then again, maybe I was overthinking this. It’s not like I wanted to take over the world. I’d also make a lousy villain.

I mean, I’m just a rich guy with connections to the highest echelons of the local society with a secret underground lair housing a group of loyal minions, and brewing secret plans to upset the balance of power between globe-spanning organizations for my own benefit.

…

“Goddamit,” I whispered as I prepared to Phase away. “At this rate, I’ll really have to invest in some metal tables where secret agents could be strapped to. And lasers. And a shark tanks. Also with lasers.”

And with that not at all depressing thought, I soundlessly disappeared from the room.