The Tyrant Wants To Live Honestly - chapter 4

I knew it. Nan’s hope turned out fruitless.

Carnon didn’t come to see me, as I expected. I only saw him on the few occasions where our eyes met briefly from afar in some corridor. Coincidental meetings owed to the fact we live in the same palace and I was moving around more often as I grew up.

Those meetings were more trivial than chancing upon a butterfly dancing across a garden, so there was no reason to write them down in a diary, nor stow them away in my memory.

I spent my days alone in Conberta Palace which was furthest from the imperial palace, located in a corner, and thus I turned eight years old.

‘If it were before, I would’ve already been punished by Carnon over and over.’

I recalled the days where I would cause commotions, shrieking to show that I was better than Ray, only to be disciplined.

How shameful I was then. Getting my hopes up for nothing, getting hurt, crying alone.

Knowing the future is such a good thing, I thought. If I didn’t have that knowledge in this life, I would’ve probably clung to Carnon again. He would’ve had me make a fool of myself as if I wasn’t unlovable enough. Him and his condescending face.

‘To live honestly…is to do nothing.’

The moment I try something, I’ll end up drawing hate and get angry. That leads to killing Ray again and losing him, my love…

It was then that a stupid voice cut my train of thought.

“Dorodorothy!”

That detestable voice. How bothersome!

It was so easy to get Carnon off my hind, yet why is this one so obsessed with me? I don’t know.

“Nan, I’m not here.”

I hid into the dense thickets nearby to evade Ray, and I did so just in the nick of time as he entered Conberta Garden.

“Nan! Where’s Dorothy?”

“I can’t say. I wonder where she went?”

Nan played the fool as I asked. Judging by her tone, it seemed she thought I was playing tag with Ray.

“She’s not…mad at me for not coming to see her lately, right?”

“That’s impossible!”

Yes, impossible. Why would I be mad that you don’t come over? I’d be happy instead.

I shook my head at Ray’s ludicrous speculation. The boy was officially acknowledged as heir to the throne, so he was busy due to the anointing ceremony that would be held a few days later.

Which was why I was having such a good relaxing time, but…

“I was going to show her my light elemental too.”

Ray mumbled dejectedly.

The elemental of light. The qualification to be the successor of Millanair, as well as the qualification to become the emperor.

There was a legend that told of how the empire of Ubera was founded by the two elementalists, Millanair and Freed.

Long, long ago, elementalist Millanair borrowed power from an elemental of light and made the sun rise, while elementalist Freed borrowed power from an elemental of darkness and made night fall.

Millanair would breathe life into creation, while Freed gifted those creations with eternal rest. Millanair illuminated the world with warm light, while Freed granted shelter from the glare and heat of day.

That was how the world and the empire of Ubera came to be.

The imperial house of Millanair are the descendants of Millanair, and the house of Freed are the descendants of Freed. The two are the great pillars supporting the empire.

But this is all a very old story.

‘I’ve never even summoned an elemental of light before.’

As generations passed, the bond between the two houses and the elementals gradually grew weak. The power of Millanair to make the sun rise had become tremendously weak, to the point of only being able to light a small fire now. What’s more is that children utterly incapable of communing with elementals are being born as of late.

One of those children was none other than Dorothea Millanair. The girl who didn’t inherit the power and talent of Millanair. It had long been a tradition that only elementalists are given the right to become emperor, and I was completely excluded from that. Ray, on the other hand, was able to summon an elemental from an early age and as he grew to properly control that power, he was finally deemed worthy as crown prince by the emperor.

With that, people had another reason to not love me. I tossed away the hope that one day, I, too, can have my own elemental of light. Not once have I managed to summon one to my very death day. And that only served to fuel my envy towards Ray.

Pah, what light, what elemental. The Millanairs of ancient could supposedly control the sun and make life grow, but now, well, perhaps they can replace a lantern to light the way on a dark night? Be of some use when searching an underground storehouse?

Insignificant fireflies are what they are, barely maintaining their rule by depending on history long gone.

I could not accept the authority of that light, and I could not accept Ray who stood above me using that worthless power.

That was why I resolved to take up the sword. To steal what power the elementals had over the world. I gave my declaration with a bloody blade in hand: I will take the crown myself, end the era of myth and begin a new age for humans!

But I failed in the end. Unable to wield the ability of elementals, it wasn’t long since I rose to power when I was executed as a tyrant.

Perhaps it’s true that the elementals decide who gets to be emperor. Maybe my wretched, miserable end was punishment meted by the great legend itself, a consequence of my arrogance.

“Nan, do you really not know where Dorothy went? I was going to introduce a friend to her.”

There I was hunched in the thickets, lost in memories, when Ray’s voice sounded right nearby.

Friend? A friend of his will be around his age anyway. I’ll only get wearied by the meeting.

I had no wish to see an elemental that wasn’t allowed to me, nor Ray’s dopy friend, so I decided to get away from the area.

“Dorodorothy~”

Thus began an unexpected game of tag. I hid from his sight and crawled away, inch by inch. A good thing about being young was that being small was useful for hiding. The twigs of the thickets grazed my tender skin and oh it hurt, but it was far better than playing with Ray.

After moving cautiously through the thickets for some time, I was finally able to escape the garden.

‘Sorry, nan. I leave Ray to you. I’m gonna have to go up and take a nap in my room.’

And off I went with light steps, however…

Thump!

My mind was occupied being on the lookout for Ray, so I ended up colliding with something black that came out from the corner and was bounced off, landing on my buttocks.

“Oww…”

Just who is in my palace apart from Nan? Even servants and attendants rarely come here, only when they have to maintain the building.

“Sorry. Are you alright?”

A hand suddenly extended before my face. Upon seeing the hand was white, pretty, and too small to belong to an adult, I raised my chin to look at who I had run into…and I simply froze. I could not take his hand—

“Are you hurt badly?”

Beautiful crimson eyes, and jet-black hair.

“…Theon.”

—because it was him.

His name left my lips like an uncontrollable instinct, and he became wide-eyed in surprise for a moment before grinning widely. Every precious, tiny little change in his expression did not escape my eyes.

“You know my name?”

His voice was soft. He was still young, but nevertheless, it had been so long since I was hearing that voice of his.

“Why are you here…”

I thought to run away from him, but my body did not listen to me; my heart was beating louder than ever before, yearning to go to Theon.

Theon Freed, the man who taught my heart how to beat. A man with elegant black hair and powerful crimson eyes that made for contrast, not to mention the intellectual air about him which belied his strong body that seemed capable of running all day long.

But the thing that shook my heart more than anything…

‘Pleased to make your acquaintance, Princess Dorothea Millanair.’

It was his respectful yet warm voice. He was a man of few words, living up to being a Freed who considered silence to be a virtue. He was someone who shone subtly like the moon that illuminates the darkness of night.

And even now, he was shining so beautifully, here before my eyes.

“Ah…! I’m so sorry. It must’ve hurt a lot.”

He knelt by my side looking a little bewildered and took out a white handkerchief to gently dab at my cheeks.

It was then I realized I was crying. Tears were falling before my knowing, drenching the front of my dress.

“Your clothes got all dirty too. Can you stand?”

Theon worriedly, carefully brushed off the dirt and leaves stuck to my skirt.

I broke down at his kind words. I clenched my jaws to stop the tears, but I could not hold back the emotions welling up.

I felt resentment and a painful aching, but at the same time, I felt a gush of joy.

“Theon…Theon…”

I was afraid of meeting him, so I tried to live life forgetting him. Yet in spite of that, I missed him so much I felt like I was going crazy.

He was my love, my husband…and the one who abandoned me by ending his own life.

‘Remember this—Your greed is what killed me.’

His last words for me before his death were of fury and resentment

But here he was now, before my eyes, alive and so beautiful.

I could not help but grip his sleeve and lay bare my agonizing yearning. I knew he would think me strange, but I felt like I would explode otherwise.

“I missed you…”

After you left my side, I reigned as a tyrant and was executed, and since the very day I came back in time, I’ve only ever imagined seeing your face, all those years.

Theon couldn’t understand the meaning of my words, but even so, he gently wiped away my tears for me.

How can you be so warm, here in the present?

You, who didn’t cast a single look my way. You, who never took the hand I held out to you.

How many people knew, I wonder, that the great tyrant Dorothea Millanair had in truth never even kissed her husband once before?

“Um…don’t cry.”

Theon took me in his hands consolingly and patted my back, even as I mumbled nonsense. His warm embrace, his soft two arms wrapped around me.

Ah, Theon, please…

It was my first time. My first time being in his embrace.

That warmth made me cry even louder like a child.

“Hic, hic…”

I felt like I had fulfilled my duty in life, just by the fact that he was alive, he who just might be the reason behind my time regression…

“Dorothy!”

A bright voice sounded from afar at that moment.

Ray raced over from the garden before coming to a stop. He looked between me and Theon and frowned.

“Theon, did you make dear Dorothy cry?”

Ray glared at Theon with cold eyes that were unlike his usual self.