The Unnamed God. I'm really Not a God You Guys! - Chapter 534: A River! (Please Read in a Dramatic Voice)

This new environment is extremely gloomy—lots of darkness with some slight glow from the lichen. Overall I’d say it is like the set of a horror movie.

You know, the kind where you expect some creature to jump from the shadows and eat the handsome male lead’s face. In that case, that would be me.

Ah, but there is one thing that is far from gloomy. That would be the humongous smile on my companion’s face. Phobia? Gone. Fear? No trace of it. He’s even humming along with me. Not a care in the world.

Why? Because I said I’d protect him. That’s it. Nothing else. He has no concrete proof of my identity or that I have been truthful and yet…

Now, I feel kinda dumb. If he trusts me so much, what’s the point of this journey in the first place? I can just tell him not to be scared of the domesticated Gus.

Oh well, this is now a sightseeing journey, I guess. Anyway, I’ll be here for a little while.

“How are the Gus here compared to the ones in the god realm?”

Even his voice sounds the very definition of happy.

[Big, smart, pretty cool.]

“Smart? This is amazing! I just wish it was possible to talk to the Gus down here.”

[I mean you can. I’ll show you once we find one.]

“Really? This is amazing! Thank you!”

We keep walking. Soon enough, the place turns into a big cavern that almost feels like a new world. There are stalactites and stalagmites everywhere. There is even the sound of flowing water in the background.

I can’t help but think this place would be a nice tourist attraction. If they increased the lichen quantity, it could almost look like a night sky.

At least it is quiet and peaceful. I keep going, observing my surroundings. I try and head toward the sound we’re hearing.

Before long, we reach what looks like a small underground river. I slowly approach it, and sure enough, the water is rapidly flowing in it.

“*Gasp* Isn’t there something very weird with the water?!”

Oh, fair enough. The pitch-black color is a bit abnormal for sure. I put a finger in, then a fist, and I can feel the cool sensation. It doesn’t seem to be harmful.

That’s when my companion does the same curiously. He’s just put a single finger in that he starts howling in pain.

“ARRG! It hurts so much!”

What the hell?! I quickly do my best to heal him, and he returns to his happy-go-lucky personality. Now he’s looking at me with even shinier eyes.

“This is amazing! This potent demonic poison is nothing to you! As expected of the Eternal Gu Breeder!”

[Yeah, about that…]

“Of course, you fear no poison no matter how deadly! I bet you could even swim in it and you would be fine! Hahaha.”

That’s when he starts looking at the river and at me, full of expectations. This is a new experience for me.

Still, do I look like the kind of man that will go along with someone’s expectations just to get their approval? Please!

*Splash! *

“Oh my god! This is amazing! You can really swim in a poisonous river like it’s nothing!”

Eh, so the answer was yes. But can I really be blamed? He looks so damn delighted right now. I feel like I’ve just fulfilled someone’s dream. I feel validated and awesome.

*Gargle*

“This is insane! Are you drinking it! What does it taste like?!”

[Surprisingly, oatmeal. Not the consistency but the taste for sure. It feels quite filling, to be honest.]

“I can’t believe this is happening. No one would ever believe this! I guess it was worth it of me to keep praying all this time!”

I can’t let that one slide.

[Nope. That’s where you’re wrong. Do you know how many people pray daily? Me showing up is just a coincidence. In the future, you’ll have to take care of yourself. Do you understand?]

“Ah…yes.”

He looks extremely disappointed.

[Look, it’s fine to pray, but you can’t just sit on your ass waiting for a miracle. That’s not having faith. That’s being lazy. No one likes lazy people.]

“Ah, yes!”

I watch attentively everywhere around. There doesn’t seem to be any danger whatsoever.

[Wait for me, I’ll be right back.]

What do I plan on doing? I dive right in the water. It doesn’t seem that deep. I’m wondering if there are any aquatic Gus that live here.

Perhaps there will be Gu lobsters? I wonder how good these would taste. Could you picture growing Gus as seafood? Eh, riverfood. Wouldn’t that be amazing?

But no matter how much I search, there doesn’t seem to be any. Let’s add this to the bucket list, start a magical lobster farm. I slowly emerge, but I do it as a movie star would. My chest is glistering with pearls of water. I shake my head in the coolest way possible to dry it and…

“My eyes! It burns so much!”

Talk about being shot down! I was just practicing. It wasn’t meant for him. Ah, never mind. Poison water somehow flew into his eyes, my bad.

A healing spell later, he’s fine and looking at me with adoration. Okay, is it bad that a part of me is getting super happy about it? #No Homo

This is the kind of sidekick that will marvel at anything you possibly do. Like right, now my clothes have melted thanks to the poison that turned out to be more potent than I thought…He’s not even pointing it out.

[Alright, let’s keep going.]

Just as he’s nodding, we hear a noise.

*BZZZ*

What is this? It sounds like a fly. In the distance…I can’t see shit because it’s dark. We wait and wait some more, but nothing happens.

That’s weird. It was definitely coming this way. Oh well, I guess we ought to keep going. This is probably a Gu, right?

“EEK! On your arm!”

[What’s up?]

That’s when I turn my head. Right on my upper arm is a creature straight out of a nightmare. The base seems to be a mosquito.

But there is definitely something very wrong with it. The part where it sucks blood? It has many tentacle-looking thingies. Its wings are jagged, and its eyes are glowing.

That’s when I see it stab it all toward me. Mosquito?! Diseases! Suffering! Death!

*SLAP! *

*SQUISH*

“Weren’t we looking for a Gu?”

Ah, I kinda reacted instinctively. I hate mosquitoes. These annoying pests will disturb you, especially when you are sleeping. Well, time for BS again.

[Just not this one. Did you see how easily it died? We may as well look for a Gu ancestor directly, wouldn’t you agree?]

“Ah, this makes perfect sense!”

[Of course!]

Of course, it does (?). I totally didn’t just make this trip longer. Still, I can’t wait to see what the Gu ancestors will look like…