The way to Protect the Female Lead’s Older Brother - Chapter 21

“Sana noona,” Jeremy greeted me.

I pulled my hand away from the banister and walked the last few steps out of the dungeon. A guardsman quietly closed the door behind me.

I glanced briefly at the trail of blood leading to the East Wing and was tempted to follow it. My plans were ruined if the heroine’s brother bled to death.

I quickly dismissed the thought.

It looked like someone else besides Cassis needed my attention.

“Jeremy, why are you sitting on the floor like that?” I said.

My little brother’s elbows were resting against his knees, and his back was arched as he held his chin in his hands. His posture was similar to the abject peasant boys who sat on the village doorsteps when they failed to beg for any food.

Instead of feeling sorry for him, I thought his moping was quite cute. His dark pinstripe vest and cravat contrasted nicely against his pale skin, and his listless eyes were those of a sad, spoiled child rather than someone starving to death.

I wrapped my arms around myself, slightly chilled from being underground for so long. It was obvious that Jeremy had been waiting for me. I had to almost step over him to get past the narrow corridor, and I did not think he had business in the dungeons. Cassis Pedelian had been the only prisoner as of late.

How odd. If Jeremy needed me, he could always wait outside my room. The dungeons were on the other side of the manor near the servants’ quarters and had a rat infestation.

I felt inclined to wrinkle my nose. My siblings and I had heard the story of a bothersome child who got eaten by rats.

“Noona, that sh*-,” he stopped. “I came here because I wanted to see the Pedelian.” His high-pitched tone made me smile, even though he was upset. His forlorn expression was easy to read. He must have snuck downstairs and heard father announce that Cassis was my new toy.

Before, Jeremy had said he would stay away from Cassis Pedelian. He had even offered to cordon it off from Charlotte, but now he was admitting that he saw the new toy. I knew I couldn’t take his promises seriously. He was an inquisitive child. That characteristic had been his downfall in the original novel.

“You would have seen it being carried in the M- Hall as well, since it connects to here,” I replied. “Why bother staying in this dingy corridor?”

My mind was still distracted by Cassis’s condition. I wanted to dismiss my brother immediately and had an urge to flick his forehead.

Cheer up, I wanted to say. Surely, your troubles aren’t life-or-death.

Instead, I brushed his hair with my fingers and softly grazed his cheek. It was always fun to give him a small cowlick.

“I followed Father. He said he wanted another look at noona’s toy too,” Jeremy said stiffly. His mouth trembled. He was still upset, but my touch seemed to make him feel a bit better.

“Noona, later can I play with your toy by myself?” He lifted his chin from his hands and sat straighter. He held his breath as he waited for my answer.

His innocent question didn’t faze me.

“Yes, but later,” I said.

“Why?”

“You saw the toy’s condition after Father played with it. I told the guards to take it to the Grey Room and clean it up. I don’t want to play with it now either,” I said.

Jeremy rose and brushed the seat of his pants, heartened by the dismissive tone in my voice. I didn’t seem to value the toy as much as he had thought and I had promised him that he would have a chance with Cassis.

He then dropped a bombshell on me.

“Oh, I also saw noona’s mother,” Jeremy said.

I controlled my face carefully and continued to look unconcerned.

“Strange,” I said. “Where was she?”

“Yes, she was in front of noona’s room. She’s probably waiting inside for you.”

Jeremy and my mother’s personalities were drastically different. It would have been draining to deal with the two of them at once.

I wondered why my mother had come to see me in the main house so soon again. We had met less than two weeks ago, right before I partook in the last family dinner.

“She heard you had a new toy. That’s why she came to visit,” Jeremy continued.

It made sense. “Did my mother say that to you?” I said.

“No, I overheard her talking to Emily,” he said.

His mouth curled into a twisted smile and revealed his sharp teeth. When he began to laugh, I was reminded for a moment of Lant Agriche.

“Noona, the look on your mother’s face was f*$king funny,” he kicked the wall. He held his arms across his chest, unable to keep his composure. His thin shoulders shook. His attempt to hold in his feelings was abysmal.

I gazed at Jeremy with half-lidded eyes. Cassis Pedelian was not the only reason for Jeremy’s melancholy behaviour.

“Noona’s mother. My mother. F*&k, they act like they gave birth to demon s#$t. Why are they always shaking? F&*k!” His voice broke and he regressed into an abandoned little boy again. His laugh became hollow.

My mother’s presence must have upset him. Now I knew why he was waiting for me in a dirty corridor rather than outside my room.

Jeremy hated the idea of mothers.

The author of Hell’s Flower had given him, the main villain, one of the most tragic backstories in the novel, and since Jeremy did not talk about his troubles often, I knew most of his mother’s history from the book.

FLASHBACK

Jeremy’s mother despised her only son from his birth. 

His mother was a mousey, timid woman who ignored him as a baby. When Jeremy learned how to walk, she had a habit of dashing away from him and refused to stay in the same room with her spawn, despite his pleas to be held.  

Her fear of him worsened year by year, as Jeremy excelled in his education.

I only remember seeing the woman once, the day I came to escort Jeremy to his first family dinner. 

Her bright blue eyes froze when she heard her son was one of the top three children approved by Lant Agriche that month. I had watched from the doorway as Jeremy had boasted to her. He had waved his hand around and shrugged, telling her how strong and accomplished he was; a simple act to mask his anxiety about attending his first formal dinner. 

His mother’s mouth had widened into an O-shape and her pasty skin became slick with sweat. I suppose she felt inclined to scream or faint, but was worried that any movement on her part might encourage her son to strangle her.

I couldn’t understand why Lant Agriche had married such a weak person. Perhaps he enjoyed her petrified expressions or thought she was easy to impregnate. 

At any rate, she continued to avoid Jeremy, going so far as to run back where she came from if she accidentally met him in the corridors. 

The relationship between mother and son came to a climax three years ago, when Jeremy was twelve years old. 

Jeremy had kept his feelings bottled inside, unloved by both of his parents, until he saw his mother one day in the gardens. 

For once, his mother looked happy with the sun reflecting off her pale face. Yet the moment they locked eyes on each other, her tranquil smile warped into a soundless, frigid scream. 

She ran away from her son and he chased after her.  

Through some miracle, she managed to lock herself in her room before Jeremy could catch up to her. 

She sat on a loveseat, covering her ears, and screamed loudly to tune out her son’s shouts and the sound of his small fists banging on her door. 

With some ingenuity, Jeremy kicked the bottom door hinge with his foot and created a space to crawl into his mother’s room. 

When she saw she couldn’t escape him, Jeremy’s mother retreated to the open balcony. A gust of wind made her petticoats flutter between them, revealing her emerald buckle shoes. She held the rail with both of her hands, her back towards the sunset, and looked at her son one last time, as if she were looking at a demon. 

END FLASHBACK

I closed my eyes. The novel’s cliffhanger ended there. However, Emily had given me a retelling of the servants’ gossip. The madam had decided to jump than face Master Jeremy.

Multiple witnesses in the garden saw the woman in the yellow dress leap three stories of her own free will.

Without preamble, the guards began to pick up the trash now bleeding on the ground. She had died instantly from a broken neck.

There was gossip for months about whether Jeremy had pressured his own mother to commit suicide.

Lant Agriche even gave a toast to Jeremy in the next family dinner following his wife’s death.

It is a feat to kill someone with a mere look, Father had praised him.

Jeremy was now fifteen years old and physically stronger than me. I kept what I knew of his mother a secret. One day, I could use this weakness against him.

Jeremy sniffed. “I thought noona’s mother was a bit different, but it looks like she’s going to run away too.”

I read his expression.

His pout had deepened and his eyes were hidden in shadow when he looked down at his small foot. That woman thinks having toys is evil, as if she thinks she’s better than us. The hypocrite.

I understood what he meant.

My mother wanted me alive. She lectured me from birth to be worthy of the name Agriche, and had even gone so far as to give me basic make-up lessons before I was ten years old. (Yes, one of my closest memories of my mother was learning how to be a prostitute).

As I improved in my studies, my mother became reticent. Her lips would purse and she would eye me strangely as I practiced a coquettish look with a mirror or patted a poisonous lip gloss on my lips with my fingertip.

I knew my mother was afraid of me.

I smiled at Jeremy while I was still half-absorbed in my thoughts.

Then again, I might be misreading my mother. Aren’t children usually over-sensitive to their parents’ emotions?

“Let us head back,” I said, and held out my hand.

He was still kicking the wall with the toe of his shoe.

“Noona’s mother is there. I’m not going,” Jeremy said.

“No, not my room. Yours. It’s been a while since I’ve spoiled you.”

You’ve been a good boy to come to a lady’s room, but I can take care of you sometimes, too, my gaze told him.

Jeremy stopped kicking the wall.

“You’re not going to see your mother?” he said. “Isn’t she waiting for you?”

I rested my forehead briefly against Jeremy’s shoulder. Not too long ago we were the same height, and now he was taller than me.

I leaned back and gave him a sad and genuine smile.

“Well, I don’t feel like seeing her, either,” I said.

I wasn’t sure if I was acting to placate Jeremy or if I truly didn’t want to see my mother.

The result was the same. Jeremy was more important to me.

After Cassis or Sylvia, he was the most likely person to kill me.

I rubbed the back of his hand with my thumb before holding on to the crook of his elbow. While I escorted my brother back to his room, I tried to forget the pity or warmth I felt for the villain walking right beside me.