The way to Protect the Female Lead’s Older Brother - Chapter 6

2.6: I Hate My Second Life

Should I kill myself and try my chances at rebirth again? I thought pathetically.

That was a dismal thought; perhaps I had had another past life before I was a Korean. I had no way of knowing if I was even on my third or fourth life. Maybe I had suffered something even worse than being an Agriche.

Shouldn’t a proper villain have been born into this family instead? Although I had inherited my surname from birth, I was still not partial to the family, this house, or the values that I had been raised on.

However, I agreed on one value that I had been taught here: take advantage of an opportunity when it arises.

Although everyone was crazy here, only the strongest survived in this house.

This d*%m family had a gift of driving anyone insane. If you didn’t fit in, there was only one ending for you: to be treated as trash. I still remembered how this family had disposed of Asil’s body. He had died simply because our father viewed him as a defective product.

Since then, I strove  to become one of the most accomplished members of the family. Regardless, I still knew. Despite whatever skills I would develop, I would never be truly safe from the eyes of my father, stepparents, and siblings.

Knock Knock.

“Miss Roxana, may I come in?”

“Yes, please do,” I said.

The door opened and a maid entered my room with an expressionless face. It was a daily ritual for Emily to come see me around this time.

She held a tray with a glass of water and white piece of paper folded neatly into the shape of a packet.

“Go on,” I said.

“Miss, you are currently developing an immunity against the fifth stage of N- poison. The intensity of your dosage today has increased by 0.2 peron.* Your current dose is 4.7 peron, which is fatal to the average human. Prior to their death, the test subjects have shown severe abdominal pain after consumption.”

I gently picked up the packet and poured the white powder into the glass of water. The explanation may have sounded a bit bloody to one’s ears, but it was of no consequence to me. I drank slowly.

From an early age, every Agriche was trained to develop an immunity against most poisons. The powders and serums were weighed and mixed carefully to ensure that none of the doses were lethal. Instead of death, the most my siblings and I would look forward to would be intense pain or temporary paralysis.

However, instead of building an immunity, I was now ingesting this poison for personal reasons.

“What is Jeremy doing now?” I said.

“I last saw him in his room, Miss.”

Before Emily could take my empty glass, an impatient battering ram started to abuse my door. The wood on the door continued to thud in a heavy, quick rhythm until I nodded to Emily that I would see the guest.

When she had opened the door, a young boy pushed Emily aside and darted into the room. His light blue eyes were shining brightly on his pretty face. The colour contrasted nicely against his dark hair.

“Sana!” he shouted excitedly.

I was unsurprised by his outburst.

Jeremy, my younger half-brother. Besides Charlotte and I, he had seen father bring Cassis Pedelian home as a prize and heard that Cassis was to be moved to the dungeons.

I had been wondering since yesterday about how I should deal with Jeremy. He was fifteen years old and a bit more touched in the head than my other siblings. I saw him as a predictable child and had anticipated that he would seek me out by now.

In the novel, Jeremy was the villain who had kidnapped the female lead. He was the sole culprit that led to our family’s ruin.

“Noona, when did you get back to your room? I was here earlier—.” Jeremy stopped when he realized he was pouting like a child.

“You. What are you still doing here? Don’t you plan on leaving?” he turned to Emily. His demeanor changed completely when he turned to the maid, as if he found her very presence annoying. If someone else had walked in blindly, they might have believed for a second that Jeremy was scolding a younger child.

Emily stared blankly to pay her respects by avoiding eye contact with a noble. She was still acting under my orders. She bowed her head to Jeremy before looking at me for further instructions. With a glance, I could have told her to expel Jeremy from my room. Instead, I turned her away..

“You may leave, Emily,” I said. With a bow, she exited.

Jeremy’s bright eyes followed Emily’s retreating back. He wouldn’t normally harm anyone who served me but there was always a chance if Emily agitated him enough.

“Jeremy,” I said, once the door closed. I was annoyed with him but kept a smooth face. We had a routine. I acted like a kind and friendly older sister to him and in return he came at my beck and call.

I held out my hand. Jeremy’s eyes stayed glued on the door for another moment, as if he were still deciding on how to deal with Emily, before he brought his attention back to me.

He came closer. “Your room was empty before. Where did you go?” he asked.

He took my hand and sat down at my feet in one swift motion. He smiled and leaned against my leg as if he were a dog wagging its tail to its owner.

I could see why Jeremy had wanted to dismiss Emily so urgently. He couldn’t show this gentle side to other people. I still remembered his put-out face when he had entered my room. He had been upset that I had not sent for him earlier.

“I was in the hatchery,” I lied.

“Where the poisonous butterflies hatch?”

“Yes,” I said. I didn’t tell him that I had returned from seeing Cassis Pedelian in the dungeons.

Jeremy frowned at my response. He trusted me but disliked my answer. “Are you really going to hatch those things?”

“There is only one egg left. I hope I will succeed,” I said.

“I wish it would just die like the others.”

“The eggs are difficult to obtain. It would be a shame if we did not get a marvelous result,” I said.

Jeremy continued to look frustrated. I realized that he was worried about me. He had not learned to hide his emotions yet.

In the novel, the author had described him as a stupid villain who didn’t think twice about abducting the heroine or telling her all of the Agriche family secrets while she was held prisoner.

I could see part of Jeremy’s rash personality now, but he was still young and quite cute. His thin legs were criss-crossed on the floor and his head bobbed whenever he got excited. Although he normally acted devilish and cruel like every other Agriche, he was sweet and needy around me.

“About the toy that father brought last time,” I brought up the subject of Cassis Pedelian.

Jeremy was now bumping his forehead against one of my knees.

“It’s strange that father barred us from seeing him,” I said.

“I agree!” Jeremy said. His excitement raised the pitch in his voice.

“It must not be an ordinary prisoner,” I said.

Jeremy’s eyes widened as he took in my words.

“Are you interested in that toy?” he said, doubtfully.

I let him play with the folds of my dress for a moment before raising his face away from my skirts.

“Noona, you’ve never been interested in any of the toys before,” Jeremy said.

“This one looks fun,” I said.

His eyes narrowed as I gave him a gentle smile. “Really?” he said skeptically.

He seemed to think hard for a moment as he gazed distantly at the corner of the room. He rested his chin on my lap again. “Then I will give him to you, noona.”

It was a tremendous sacrifice on Jeremy’s part. He hardly shared. In this case,  I knew he would be agreeable. His eyes looked up at me intensely.

I was good, wasn’t I! Praise me please, noona! 

I smiled again and stroked his hair. Like a small, furry animal, Jeremy rubbed his cheek against my hand. He looked like a cat who was purring in content.

I didn’t forget that this boy would become a cruel beast. Yet when he clung to me and craved affection like this, my heart did tend to soften a bit. Jeremy was easy to care for, and in return he was always willing to fulfill my wishes.

I’m so happy that you move according to my will, I thought dryly.

I continued to pet him affectionately while I thought of other ways to use him.

Translator’s Note:  *페론 – Peron is a made-up measurement in the book.

Proofread by InquisitiveKat