We Should Have Slept While Only Holding Hands, And Yet?! - Volume 1 Chapter 9

9. Report

Sunlight entered through the window. The birds were singing.

This was the best scene to be met with after a man and a woman had spent the night together in the same bed. An energetic and vigorous morning.

Her large eyes were peacefully shut like the princess in Sleeping Beauty, and both her charming cheeks, which looked good to pull on, and her smooth lips were moving in a chewing motion as if she were sleep talking.

Her pretty features, which made her closer to being a ‘pretty girl’ than a ‘beautiful woman’, were emanating a child-like, adorable atmosphere as it sparkled.

However, her physique didn’t fit that face of hers.

Long and smooth limbs. Breasts that were neither too large nor too small and were just the perfect size to be called beautiful. The curve of her stomach and her lovely belly button didn’t have a single fine hair. There was obviously no excess fat on her hips either.

“Ehehe······.”

Additionally, above that body of hers, she was wearing only a single layer of thin pajamas which she hadn’t buttoned up properly.

In a moment like this, where a girl is in this sort of attire and sleeping right next to you while in a defenseless state,

I wonder how normal high school boys would react in this sort of situation.

‘I climax from the start! I’ll be heading up the stairs of adulthood first!’, you, who had shouted this while loading your main armament, since it seems like you have no connection to this reality, I ask you to head off to some world of adult content. You should only dream when you’re sleeping. No, just sleep. I hope you stay dreaming forever.

If you’re a sane and absolutely normal male high school student, then you would have most likely frozen up and started counting prime numbers in your head in order to do everything you could to suppress your desires and your morning physiological phenomenon.

But your heart would pound.

Your wave cannon would most likely become tingly.

We have exceeded 100% energy charged, we can fire at any time!

And my reaction······.

“······Stop pushing Saeyeon’s face towards me, kid.”

I glared at the brat who was pushing Saeyeon’s head towards me from behind Saeyeon.

“You’re awake, Dad?”

“What are you doing right now?”

“As I expected, I felt like it would only be proper procedure if a couple’s morning started off with a morning kiss.”

Jaim giggled even while looking at me who was baring his teeth.

“Since you’ve also finished pitching your tent thanks to your morning physiological phenomenon, Dad, I thought that if I could encourage you enough, then, Oh Dear! Newlyweds these days sure have great marital chemistry and energy. As soon as they woke up, they went on another honeymoon to Hong Ko······. Ugyah!”

Once I had used my leg to push the kid who was speaking nonsense, Jaim, who had just been narrowly lying down at the edge of the bed, lost her balance and painfully fell to the floor. Thud! That sound was enough to make me know that she had hit the floor with all of her weight.

“Uuuu······. Isn’t that going too far?! I even woke you up! What are you going to do if I died?!”

“I’ll at least build you a grave. Sheesh······.”

After snapping at Jaim who was glaring at me while rubbing the back of her head, I shook the still sleeping Saeyeon.

“Hey, Ja Saeyeon. Wake up.”

“Mm······. 5 more, minutes······.”

“Jaim, go.”

“······No!”

“You’re telling me that you have enough energy to utter nonsense this early in the morning, but you don’t have enough energy to wake Saeyeon up?”

“What do you mean nonsense? It’s the truth, isn’t it? Dad, if you keep this up, then you won’t be able to even pitch a tent when you grow older, you know? Around the Joseon Dynasty, people your age already had at least 2 or 3······.”

“That’s right. I haven’t done this lately.”

“Ububububububu!”

I see that these are still as stretchy as ever. After I let go of Jaim’s cheeks which made an audible ‘plop’ sound as they returned to their original position, I shook Saeyeon again.

“If you don’t wake up right now, then you won’t be eating any meat for breakfast, but you’ll be getting a garden of grass instead.”

“Hm? Meat?”

······Jeez, how exactly does this girl’s brain work?

“······Where’s, the meat······?”

“······Fine. As I had promised, I’ll make some for you, so wake up properly.”

A broad smile spread across Saeyeon’s face as she rubbed her eyes. Sheesh. Saeyeon spoke to me as I was about to grumble and get up from the bed.

“······Ehehe. Did you sleep well, Jjaro?”

“······I slept a lot thanks to you.”

Although blood wasn’t circulating through my hand properly because Saeyeon had been holding onto it throughout the night, I looked out the window while stretching and massaging my tingling hand.

In any case, the weather was good today as well. Indeed, it was an energetic and vigorous morning.

A good day to go on a family outing.

“······Jjaro, what about my morning kiss······?”

“······Go back to sleep. Sleep. Just sleep more.”

ÅÅÅ

I wonder what has changed since then.

Change, my ass. Nothing has changed.

For now, let’s talk about what happened immediately after that event.

Although it’s good that I was able to reconcile with Saeyeon and bring Jaim back to normal, since we wound up filming a family soap opera while in front of all those people, we ended up receiving weird glances from them.

During homeroom on the very day when all of that had occurred, our gorilla homeroom teacher even went as far as to tell everyone in our class about what had happened during homeroom that day. I told you guys to stop clapping. You untaught masses. It’s not like that.

After that, I had to go through hell.

As expected, Upperclassman Nabom had done a messy job. Since she had only gone as far as to make a couple of documents for me, I had to take care of the rest. I had to issue a certified copy, register Jaim, and handle all of the other trivial after-measures. These kinds of stuff are usually taken care of instantly in things like manga, but why wasn’t that also the case in real life?

“······So, why is this weird woman here again?”

“I tagged along since Underclassman Jin Jaro’s principle is to pay back someone who has helped him. On a side note, where are you, little girl? Ah, there you are. You were hidden underneath my breasts so I couldn’t see you down there.”

“H-Having large breasts isn’t everything in life! Stupid!”

In the end, I had to receive Upperclassman Nabom’s assistance again. Even though she does her work sloppily, she was at least a little helpful. Though I wound up hearing from her, “Just because I’m from the future, do you think I’ll help you if you come running to me and beg ‘Uaah, help me Upperclassman Nabom!’?” as she let out a sigh. In any case.

“Mom, is it really all right for this weird woman to follow us?”

In response to Jaim’s question, Saeyeon answered with a smile.

“It’s okay. She helped Jjaro, so this is the least we can do for her. Isn’t that right, ‘Dear’?”

“Dear? Didn’t I tell you not to call me that?”

“That was definitely a confession, mon. You said that you needed me, mon.”

“That wasn’t a confession.”

Damn it. I should have chosen my words better. That really wasn’t what I meant.

Saeyeon smiled pleasantly in response to my grumbling.

I’m not sure how exactly she had misunderstood what I had said back then, but it seems she comprehended it along the lines of ‘Jjaro proposed to me!’. This was why she was a kid. Every time I told her that that wasn’t the case, Saeyeon would merely giggle and say ‘You’re just embarrassed, aren’t you?’. How annoying.

“Well, even if he says that with his mouth, the rest of his body is honest. Look at how red his face is.”

“I’m begging here, so can you please shut up?”

Nanda chuckled at my retort.

“Man, I know I told you to talk to her properly, but I never thought that you would even say something like that. ‘You have to have sex for babies to be born!’. You really are amazing, Jjaro. A great man who deserves respect.”

“Kyaa! Kyaa! Don’t bring that up!”

“Jjaro, what exactly is sex?”

“Be quiet! You don’t have to know about that yet!”

What can I say? I was a bit crazy at that time (lol).

I want to erase this memory completely with a Memory Manipulator.

While we were chatting, Jaim pulled on my sleeve.

“Dad, you’re going to buy me clothes as well, right?”

“An outfit that’s within 30,000 won.”

“······Cheapskate.”

“I don’t have a lot of money. Moreover, didn’t I already fix your charger?”

“But you broke my game console! When are you going to fix that?”

“Kid, what are my beliefs?”

“But you promised that you would fix it back then.”

“That balance was closed because of the effort I had to go through in order to keep you here. Better luck next time.”

“······Cheapskate. Stingy.”

In response to Jaim who had said that while sticking out her lips, Saeyeon giggled and stroked Jaim’s head.

“It’s okay, Jaim. This isn’t the first time Dad has been like that, right?”

“That’s true.”

“······Saeyeon, you’re going to be like that as well?”

“All right! Mommy will buy a hairpin for you today, Jaim. Your mommy is a person who’s good at keeping promises after all.”

“Yup! Mom is good at keeping promises! Unlike a certain pile of junk.”

“Don’t call me a pile of junk! Don’t ignore me!”

Lately, these two have been getting along really well. Can’t someone do something about these two?

“That depends on how Underclassman Jin Jaro handles things from now on.”

When I had asked that at some point in time, Upperclassman Nabom had answered like that.

“Information contamination isn’t something that can be stopped just because you had dealt with it once. It can occur again and again as long as she continues to exist in this present time. However, that doesn’t mean it’ll only be in a negative way.”

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

“Mm, for example, if Underclassman Jin Jaro sticks right next to Underclassman Ja Saeyeon and enthusiastically behaves like a couple to the point of being flagrant, then there’s a chance that Miss Jaim will change into being a slightly kinder and more innocent child. Like a child who had been raised in a happy family.”

“······What?”

“In other words, according to how Underclassman Jin Jaro looks after Miss Jaim, she could become an elegant lady or a twisted brat of this generation.”

“······.”

Now I even have to be concerned about child care. My stomach hurts.

While I was recalling that conversation and trying to calm my stomach down, Saeyeon spoke.

“Now that I think about it, Jjaro, you have to buy me another flower pin.”

“······Ah. Damn it.”

Jaim tilted her head in reaction to what Saeyeon had said while smiling and my response. Saeyeon explained while beaming.

“Jjaro and I made a promise a long time ago. Every time Jjaro and I have an argument, and Jjaro is the cause, then he has to buy me a hairpin after we reconcile. Isn’t that so?”

“I don’t remember since I’m apparently a man who doesn’t keep his promises that well.”

Seriously, she even remembers a promise that we made during pre-school. She’s only good at remembering needless things. After pouting at my response, Saeyeon then grinned as if she had just recalled something.

“But Jjaro, what are we going to tell my mom and dad?”

“······Ah.”

Now that I think about it, nearly a month has passed. It’s almost around the time for Saeyeon’s parents to return from their vacation, and when they do······.

“Jjaro and I had a daughter while they were gone on a vacation.”

“······.”

What should I do? Do I have to run away?

“Jaim, make sure you give your grandma and grandpa a proper greeting, okay?”

“Okay, Mom! Don’t worry!”

In response to Saeyeon’s words, Jaim confidently patted her chest.

I see. I don’t have to worry, huh. You’re confident, huh. That’s a relief.

“I’ll tell them that Dad properly united with Mom!”

“You brat, do you intend to get me killed?!”

Have you even thought for a second how those words could be misunderstood?!

“Dad, aren’t you worrying too much?”

“That’s all your fault.”

“If you keep that up, then your head will go ba······ ubububububu?!”

“Shut it! It won’t! My hair hasn’t been falling out lately! Rather, tell me that’s a joke! Tell me right this instant! Tell me that that won’t actually happen!”

“······It won’t.”

“Good. That’s how it should be.”

“If you take care of it properly.”

“Oi, you brat!”

“Jjaro, why are you bullying your daughter? Even though you said that you’ll take care of her properly.”

“That’s right! You’re being too harsh, Dad! Mom, scold him more!”

“Ah, seriously······.”

I couldn’t stop sighing. Why did I do this? No, not the going bald thing. My hair hasn’t fallen out. It’s just temporary stress.

Not that.

I feel as if I’m becoming like one of those untaught masses.

I hate families.

The fact that families are inseparable and are a relationship where you help each other when in trouble and share each other’s happiness when something delightful happens was all a lie.

The saying that people can’t live by themselves is the excuse of those weaklings who were deceived by that saying.

I won’t be fooled by that sort of lie.

I’m tired of wasted efforts and vain hope after all.

“······.”

But, well.

I wound up smiling at Saeyeon and Jaim who were a couple of steps ahead of me and laughing together.

If everyone is going to embrace those vain efforts and hopes, if weak people, who help each other when something difficult happens and share each other’s happiness when something delightful happens, are going to gather together,

if family is what is made when everyone works hard and accomplishes their goals together,

if it’s this wife and daughter, then it might not be so bad.

For now, I decided to think like that.

“······By the way, Jjaro.”

“What is it?”

“Are we really going to sleep, while only holding hands, today as well······?”

“······We’re only going to hold hands and sleep! Seriously! Really!

〈Volume 1 End〉

20XX March XX Periodical report 中

Yes. Everything is proceeding as planned. The fluctuation rate is below the decimal point. Every situation has proceeded according to the manual.

Yes. He does not know yet. There is no need to be concerned since I am watching over him thoroughly. Underclassman Jin Jaro, no, Mr. Jin Jaro also believes that I had accidentally revealed my identity to him.

As I had expected, approaching him naturally is proceeding well. Everyone is maintaining their relationship with me while possessing an appropriate amount of resistance towards me. Yes. Yes. You do not have to worry about that problem as well.

The information contamination issue has all proceeded as planned as well. Yes. There are currently no problems whatsoever.

Pardon? No, wait. I had to tamper with the government authority of the past because I was simply following the plan, right? It was according to the manual.

Eh? Pardon? But why do I have to write a written apology······? Yes? That’s a joke, right? It isn’t? Eeh, don’t be like that. Everything I did was according to······. Rules are rules? No, that may be the case, but since it was going to become like this since the beginning······. No, I’m not complaining, yes. That may be the case, but still, that’s, pardon? Wait, that’s too much. Yes? Rationality? No, but still······. I’ll be fired if I don’t write one······? Wait, wait a second!

TL note: Thanks for reading the chapter. This was a short chapter, but it was pretty much the wrap-up. It’d probably be more appropriate to call it the epilogue. After I finish the author’s afterword, I’ll be done with volume 1 of Handholding. There is actually a side-story book for volume 1 with 2 chapters called ‘Family Before’ & ‘Family After’. I’m honestly not sure if I’ll translate this immediately or not. I’ve read through it and it’s pretty much quite literally a side story with extra antics. ‘Family Before’ covers more about Jaro’s first meeting with Nabom and ‘Family After’ is about a grocery shopping trip. If you guys want me to translate it, then I will. However, it’ll have to wait for a while. The next volume of Dungeon Defense may or may not come out soon, so it’ll depend on that. If they delay the release, then I’ll go ahead and translate that side story. However, if they don’t delay it and they’re going to properly release Dungeon Defense at the end of this month, then I’ll be taking a slight break to catch up on my reading. I have to read the remaining 7 volumes of Handholding and a couple of other stuff I’ve been putting off for a while.

I’ll be making an update post after I finish the afterword, so if you want more information, then read that.

Chapter end