Wear - Chapter 32

“You free?” Rose asks as her and Refus enter Ryan’s office.

“You’re not asking about that again, are you?” Ryan asks. “Look, I told you, you’re the one I see fit for the job of being principal, if and when I have to leave”.

“I’m here to ask about a couple things” Rose asks, “and yes, that is one of them. I just can’t shake this bad feeling. You know something is going to happen, don’t you?”.

“No, none of us know what the future holds for us” Ryan says. “I made my decision based on a hunch, that is all”.

“Then, since you’re so abstinent in your response” Rose says, “on to the next thing. Why was Sarah here? What did she need to talk to you about, that was so important that she had to go behind the family’s back to talk with you about?”.

“Now Rose” Refus says, “she said she couldn’t talk to you or your family about it for a reason”.

“How many times do I need to tell you to shut up before you finally get the idea?” Rose asks.

“I’m afraid Refus is right in this situation” Ryan says. “That is something I can not tell you, Rose. As much as it hurts, it was never my choice to tell you. I hope you’ll forgive me, but most of all, I hope you’ll forgive your sister. It is a delicate matter, and for that reason, she’s trying to handle it the very best she can. Please don’t feel poorly about Sarah. One day, you will get to know about this situation. On that day, I hope that you take the time to consider how Sarah felt when she had to do what she did”.

“What did she do!?” Rose asks.

“It’s nothing that’ll fall on your shoulders” Ryan says. “Just know that I’ve been trying to help her for a long time”.

“And why am I supposed to believe that, if you refuse to tell me?” Rose asks. “You’ve elected to have me take over your seat one day, but you won’t tell me why that is, or even why… whatever it is that’s happening with Sarah! You know I hate being kept in the dark like that!”.

“You’re one to talk” Ryan says. “I’ve seen yours and Refus’s signatures on the bill already. I thought I told you I’m handling this”.

“And I told you, it’s personal for me!” Rose says. “Of course I’m going to help with this bill!”.

“Then we can come to an understanding?” Ryan asks. “For reasons personal to you, you decided to help my position without telling me about it. For reasons personal to Sarah, I can’t tell you why I’m helping her, just like how there’s reasons I can’t tell you why I have a hunch about my position being in danger as principal”.

“So it is endangered!?” Rose shouts.

“Rose…” Ryan says calmly, “all of this in due time. The universe works in mysterious ways. We can only hope worse doesn’t come to worst, but at the same time, just sitting around and hoping does no good. Hope for the best, but prepare for the worst”.

“May I ask a question?” Refus asks. “Why can’t you tell us about the situation?”.

“Because, you guys are working hard enough” Ryan says. “Adding to that burden will only make moving forward with everything harder, as well as increase the likelihood of the worst case scenario occurring. All of the matters at hand are delicate, and must be handled as such. You guys can understand, right?”.

“No, not really” Refus says.

Rose pauses, then asks “One condition… we’ll continue doing our side of the support, regardless of what you want us to do. Since you’re keeping information hidden from me, that makes us even. However, you must eventually tell us about everything. Can we at least agree on that?”.

“My dear Rose” Ryan says, “I never planned to hide everything from you forever. Otherwise, I wouldn’t even let you know anything was going wrong to begin with. I would’ve kept everything hidden from the very beginning”.

“Yeah… I figured that’d be your response” Rose says as she turns around and begins to leave.

“Wait!” Ryan says. “Can you at least try to overlook Sarah’s disposition? If not for her, do it for me? Please don’t think so poorly of your sister. I know she probably said this before, but hard decisions had to be made”.

Rose looks over her left shoulder and says “I make no promises that I can’t keep. I’ll let you know what I think when I understand what’s going on”.

Rose then leaves, and now just Ryan and Refus stand in the room. “Did you also have something you needed to talk about?”.

“I know it’s a long shot” Refus says, “but can you at least inform me about… Sarah’s disposition?”.

“I can not” Ryan says.

“I figured” Refus says. “I just… felt like maybe I should help as well. Rose seems really bent out of shape about this, and-“.

“And you feel close to her in a sort of sense?” Ryan asks.

“N-no… that’s not it” Refus says. “I just… feel sorry for Sarah, I guess. When she spoke, she had this… this look in her eyes. Like she yearned to turn back time and undo everything”.

“Sarah isn’t good at hiding things like that” Ryan says. “If I’m to be completely honest, it’s why she couldn’t face her family for so long. She felt ashamed, and incredibly saddened about her situation. She didn’t want to drag her family down with her actions”.

“Yeah… I had a feeling it was something like that” Refus says.

“Is it a kind of feeling you’re familiar with?” Ryan asks.

“That’s one way to put it…” Refus responds. “I’ll be taking my leave now, Ryan”.

“Alright” Ryan says. “Make sure you’re keeping yourself in check. You’re a good teacher, and I don’t want to see that ruined for such a silly reason as a quarrel with… I’m going on a whim here when I say this, but Quincy’s deal you made with him”.

“Yeah…” Refus says. “I know what I’ve gotten myself into, Ryan. Don’t worry about my issue, it’s not going to get out of hand”.

“That’s reassuring” Ryan says calmly.

“Anyways” Refus says with a quick bow, “I’ll leave you to your work now”.

“Take care, Refus” Ryan says. “And take care of Rose while you’re at it. I’m sure I don’t need to tell you this, but you might end up seeing a side of her that she’ll never show anyone”.

Refus laughs softly and says “I’m not that close to Rose. I’m just… trying to help whenever I can. I don’t see her under that kind of light, but… well, it’s better to work with people when they’re at their highest. Not when they’re at their lowest”.

“Well said” Ryan says. “Then you understand after all, as to why I can’t tell either of you about these issues in detail”.

“Yeah… I guess so” Refus says as he leaves.

After Refus leaves, and Ryan was left alone in his office, Ryan pulls out some paper and a pen. “A deal is a deal” Ryan says to himself. “I’ve agreed to let Rose know about everything at some point, so I’ll write down the details for her. I’ll likely not be able to give her this myself, if worse does come to worst”.

As Ryan writes down this story on the paper, all of the memories of what happened started to come back to him, overwhelming him like a tsunami. Over 20 years ago, Sarah graduated high school. One day, she came up to talk to Ryan at his house, which was next door to their mother’s house at the time. “Heya, gramps!” Sarah says as Ryan answers the door.

“Sarah, what’re you so-” Ryan begins to ask.

“My boyfriend asked me to move out of town with him!” Sarah says. “We’re finally moving forward with our relationship! Maybe some day, he’ll ask me to marry him!”.

“Oh ho!” Ryan says. “So that’s what has you so excited? You’re really crazy about your high school sweetheart”.

“W-well” Sarah says, “I-I just-“.

“Don’t worry, I get it” Ryan says. “You’ve talked to your mother, I trust?”.

“Yeah” Sarah says, “although, Rose would probably scold me for being so reckless. She’s too busy with college anyways, so she won’t likely take the time to talk about something she doesn’t even… approve of”.

“Does Rose have a problem with your boyfriend?” Ryan asks.

“She’s never trusted anyone” Sarah says. “Is that a surprise?”.

“Well, be careful out there” Ryan says. “It’s a big world, so you know your mother will be worried. Make sure you call her whenever you can, alright?”.

“Yeah yeah” Sarah says, “don’t worry, I plan on it. This is why we keep calling you gramps… you’re always so worried”.

Sarah left to Genovyra a few days later with her boyfriend, Henry Hannebe. Every day, she would call her mother, and at least once a week, would call Ryan as well. However, after a couple months, the phone calls suddenly stopped. Ryan and her mother, Jaqueline Weber, began to panic. The two would work together trying to find a way to get in contact with her. They would call her phone, but there would never be an answer. They would write to her, but she never responded. Eventually, Ryan moved to the south side of Terrio, where he were to start working as a teacher at a college called Harrison University. Suddenly, when he was at home, he got a phone call from an unknown number. Ryan ignored the call at first, but the number kept calling him over and over. “Hello?” Ryan asks as he finally picks up the phone.

After Ryan spoke, he could hear sobbing on the other side of the line. “G-gramps? Is that really you?” A familiar voice asks.

“Sarah!?” Ryan panics. “Where are you!? Where have you been!?”.

“I-I’m at a police station” Sarah says. “I was picked up off the street, and the law enforcement are trying to help me find a contact or relative to take me off of the streets”.

“The streets!?” Ryan asks.

“Gramps… I’m homeless” Sarah says while sobbing. “Henry and I… we were engaged, but he… he-“. Sarah couldn’t finish her sentence, as she started crying uncontrollably.

“Calm down” Ryan says. “Take it slow. What happened?”.

“Not long after he proposed to me” Sarah begins to say, “I found him cheating on me. He kicked me out of the house, and left me on the streets. He refuses to answer me, and he won’t even look my way, let alone let me back inside… I have nowhere else to go, gramps”.

“Hold on” Ryan says, “I’ll get in contact with your mother, and we’ll-“.

“Please don’t…” Sarah says behind tears. “I-I can’t… tell my mother about what happened. It’ll just… put a lot of weight on her shoulders. She can’t know about it, because it’ll just bring shame on the whole family. Mom has spent so long trying her best to maintain her position, ever since dad left her. If people knew about me, they’d just assume it’s like a tradition for the family”.

“What do you mean!?” Ryan asks. “Why are you saying-“.

“Gramps” Sarah interrupts, “… I’m pregnant. If everyone who knows our family learns about this, they’ll just assume that our entire family is like that. They’ll use excuses like that to bring down mom. All of her hard work will be for nothing…”.

Ryan thinks for a minute, then says “Hold on, I’ll come get you. We’ll take care of this, I promise”.

When Ryan travels to the police station out in Genovyra. When he picks up Sarah in his car, he noticed she looked very sick. Her skin was pale, and she looked like she was struggling to stand, as her belly was swelling with a baby. “Sarah… what happened to you? Are you okay? Do you need something to eat?”.

Sarah thinks for a while, as tears began to dry on her face. “I could use a meal or two” Sarah says in a low voice. “I haven’t been eating, and I’m worried… about the baby”.

“Are you keeping the baby?” Ryan asks.

“I don’t think… I have the right to raise a child, gramps” Sarah says in a low monotone voice.

Ryan could tell from Sarah’s voice alone, that both her spirit and body have been broken by her recent situation. “I-…. I’m very sorry” Ryan says. “Once again, there were people I love who I should’ve been there for, but I have failed… once again, I have yet another thing I have to make up for…”.

“What are you talking about?” Sarah asks. “You’ve done nothing wrong”.

“No… I’ve failed my loved ones once again” Ryan says. “Just like how I let my brother down…”.

“I’ve… never heard about your brother” Sarah says.

“Then shall we exchange stories when we get to my home?” Ryan asks with a soft smile on his face.

Sarah looks down at her feet and says “Yeah… sure”.

A few months later, Sarah was beginning to go into labor. Sarah’s mother, Jacqueline, as well as Rose still don’t know about Sarah’s return to Terrio. Ryan took Sarah to the hospital to give birth. When the baby finally arrived, Ryan was led into the room and then sat by Sarah’s side.

“Gramps” Sarah says in a weak voice, “she’s got my hair and eyes”. As Sarah smiled, she cried both tears of sorrow and tears of happiness.

“I know you’re putting her up for adoption” Ryan says, “but have you thought of a name for her?”.

Sarah thought for a while, then softly says “Emily”. As she spoke her name, tears began to flow uncontrollably. The more she thought about her child, the more weight was put on her heart. “It’s such a beautiful name. I hope she grows up to be a great person. That much won’t be possible if she were… stuck with me… as her mother”. As Sarah finally finished speaking, she couldn’t stop herself from sulking. Ryan didn’t know what to say to help. Instead, all he could do, was sit by her side through it all. “I’ve already… requested the hospital to find a proper adoption center for her” Sarah says as she stares at her daughter. “If I were to do it myself, then I don’t think I’d ever be able to let go of her. I-I j-just want… what’s best for her”.

Sarah once again begins crying uncontrollably. Ryan puts his hand on her shoulder and says “I understand. I promise I won’t think less of you for being scared for your child. It’s natural to feel like this. If I can meet whatever couple takes Emily in, I promise to help look after her”.

“T-thank you, gramps!” Sarah says as she cries. Sarah couldn’t find the strength to talk to her family for years after that. However, when she finally began to speak with her family again, she rarely said anything to any of them. She couldn’t bear to show her face to her mother or Rose, as she feared that she had brought nothing but dishonor and disrespect to their family name.

Almost a year later, Ryan walks into a clothing store. There, he met an old woman and a young couple that held a familiar baby in their arms. That baby, was Emily Weber, who was now Emily Bernnigan. “Excuse me” Ryan says, “are you the parents of this adorable little child?”.

“Indeed we are” Jay says. “Although, we’re the adoptive parents, I’ll treat her as if she were my own”.

“You seem oddly fixated on this young child” Matilda says.

“Well, it’s just…” Ryan says, “I know her biological mother and all. I’m just glad to see the baby is in good hands”.

“Interesting” Matilda says. “What’d you say your name was?”.

“I didn’t” Ryan says. “But it’s Ryan Schafold. It’s a pleasure to meet you”.

“Matilda Hadley” Matilda says as she shakes Ryan’s hand. “I’m helping these two stay on their feet and look after this child. Maybe we can stay in touch, and I can let you know about this child if you’re ever worried”.

“That’d be great” Ryan says. “Please do let me know if you ever need my assistance”.

At the time, Ryan had no idea that the couple were laibah. Until one day, that same couple came to their school nearly 20 years later with the girl, now an adult. “You look familiar” Lyra says. “Weren’t you that old man at Matilda’s shop?”.

“You guys know each other?” Emily asks. “Is he a… you know… one of THOSE humans?”.

“Emily!” Jay shouts. “Don’t be so rude towards the humans! This man has done nothing to you”.

“Yeah, you say that now…” Emily says as she crosses her arms.

“Are you guys by any chance laibah?” Ryan asks. “Don’t worry, our school will offer laibah and humans the same chance at life. I will not allow anyone to push her aside for being laibah… oh that’s right, she’s adopted, isn’t she?”.

“H-how’d you know that!?” Emily asks.

“That’s where I remember you from!” Ryan says as he stands and shakes Jay and Lyra’s hand. “You’re that lovely couple that adopted Emily!”.

“What’s it to ya?” Emily asks.

“Emily, not so rude” Lyra says. “He’s also an acquaintance of Matilda. He’s a friendly face”.

“So this is THE Emily, all grown up?” Ryan asks.

“Have we met before, old man?” Emily asks.

“Indeed, we have” Ryan says. “Don’t worry. If you decide to send Emily here, I will personally help look out for her well being”.

“You will!?” Lyra asks with a sigh of relief. “Oh thank the heavens!”.

“But I don’t want to go!” Emily complains. “What am I gonna do if something bad happens to you two?”.

“We’ll be fine, honey” Lyra says.

“It’s time you looked out for yourself, Emily” Jay says. “You’re an adult, you need to start acting like it”.

“You’ll be in safe hands” Ryan says. “As well as, I’ll keep in touch with Matilda to try and reach out to your parents whenever you’re worried. Is that alright with you, Emily?”.

“No, it’s not alright” Emily says.

Jay smiles and says “Sorry, she’s quite the fighter. She’s not very quick to trust people”.

“She reminds me of a certain couple of people I know then” Ryan says with a laugh.

As Ryan finishes writing down this story on the piece of paper, he folds the paper up and put it in an envelope. He then writes “Rose Weber” on the envelope and hides the note in his desk. “One day” Ryan says, “you’ll get to know about everything, Rose. Why looking after Emily was so important to me, why Sarah has been worried about this school, why she had to do what she had done, all of it shall be put in the light for you. Just… not now, Rose. We have to take life one problem at a time, and I’m afraid I’ve already put a lot on your shoulders. If you can’t accept that, then I’ll at least tell you the story about my brother, Franklin. I don’t want to hide what I do from you. Just know I do this out of careful consideration. You guys are like a family to me…”. Ryan then takes a deep sigh and tries to put the note he had just written out of his mind. “One day at a time, Ryan” he tells himself. “One day at a time…”.