Why Are You So Obsessed With Rejecting Affection? - Chapter 32

“Shushu.”

I kicked my quilt off with my lips pursed, at that same moment I heard the voice of the Grand Duke who was knocking on the door.

“Yes… ”

When I open the door, I have to show the Grand Duke a crestfallen expression.

But I couldn’t keep the Grand Duke waiting by the door for too long.

I finally got up and opened the door.

“You called for me?”

When I asked with the door slightly open, the Grand Duke sighed lightly.

“You skipped breakfast. Are you sick?”

He asked, pushing his hand slightly through the slightly opened door trying to widen it more.

He seemed to have realized that I started to hate going out of my room.

I regained a little bit of my composure, thanks to the Grand Duke’s considerate attitude that made him not completely open the door against my wishes.

“No.”

“But why did you skip your meals? Everyone was worried about you.”

“That… “

I hesitated for a moment because I don’t know what to say in response.

I don’t know why I’m not feeling good.

But what was certain was that I didn’t want to worry about making the Grand Duke stand at the door like this.

I don’t want to be a troublesome daughter just as soon as I was brought into the family.

I opened the door a little more and looked up carefully at the Grand Duke.

The Grand Duke was holding a covered serving plate in his hand.

“What is that?”

“Can I come in?”

The Grand Duke did not answer my question. I nodded and stepped out of the gap in the doorway a little.

“Come and sit down.”

The Grand Duke with the plate set on the table called out to me.

I sat down with a confused gaze at the plate.

“I don‘t like you having an empty stomach. You have to eat well to grow tall.”

When the Grand Duke opened the lid of the cloche, the delicious smell of soft seaweed drifted out.

It was a light soup topped with square pieces of bread.

Krook.

At that moment, I held my stomach with an embarrassed blush because of the sound it made.

“Aren’t you hungry but you still won’t eat?”

The words of the Grand Duke, who spoke indifferently, brought on a sense of shame.

I grabbed the spoon that was placed next to the soup.

“Is it okay for the Grand Duke to bring me soup?”

Even if the Grand Duke brought the plate with the maids and servants to transport it? Are you not disregarding some rule in etiquette or anything like that?

“Then, I couldn’t even feed my daughter, what should a Grand Duke do? And not Grand Duke… ”

“Yes, Appa.”
[e/n: she’s using the Korean word for Dad here.]

I nodded softly. Since someone as high status as the ‘Grand Duke’ brought it to me, I have the glory of receiving and drinking this soup.

“It’s delicious!”

As soon as I drank it, I felt the soaring depression disappear.

As I took the spoon and smiled broadly, the eyes of the Grand Duke smiled faintly.

“Now, then it‘s not because you‘re sick or because you‘re full. Why did my daughter choose not to eat?”

“That… I don’t know either.“

“Must you bother your father?”

I tighten my hold at the spoon as the Grand Duke’s words hit me.

I blinked my eyes when I couldn’t answer, and one of the Grand Duke’s eyebrows rose high.

“That‘s right. Do you regret the adoption?”

“What?”

“It isn’t weird to miss your relatives once in a while.”

“I don‘t miss them!”

As soon as the Grand Duke decided to abstain, he seemed to think that I regretted the adoption because my family could be looking for me.

I was speechless for a moment, but I clenched my fist and complained.

Regret the decision of adoption? How could it be?!

‘Had I not created this opportunity, we would not have met, why would I do this and then regret it?!‘

I put my spoon down on the table and jumped up from my seat.

“If you knew how happy I am, you wouldn’t be able to say that!”

I realized why I felt bad when the Grand Duke told me I was missing my birth family.

‘It wasn’t because I was happy that he found me, but because I was angry.’

Now, the real Shuelina has already disappeared.

The child disappeared without being properly loved by her family. Why are you looking for her now?

“My only family members are Appa and my two brothers.”

“Well… “

The Grand Duke looked somewhat happy.

When I saw the oddly raised corners of his mouth, I remembered that the Grand Duke was also clumsy when it comes to affection.

‘I was just anxious.’

I was worried that I would just go away when the emperor said he was looking for me.

I think that the memories of being rejected by others are so strong that I assumed that regardless of what I want I will get thrown away…

Even if I’m a grown-up.

Somehow I frowned a little and stared at him blankly. Soon afterward, I cleared my mind and glared at the Grand Duke with deliberately bitter eyes.

“No, but if His Majesty comes to look for someone, please promise that you will not send me!”

“Except if you wanted to go in person, no one can stop you from being by my side.”

At those words, I laughed faintly and drank the soup.

When I had finished eating the toasted bread and the soup, the Grand Duke stood up from his seat with a face that seemed completely relieved.

“Now you can come with me. I have something to do before the afternoon.”

He lifted me up into his arms. Then he immediately tried to leave my room.

“N-no! She’s still in her pajamas!”

“Ah.”

At that time, Nina, who was standing with her feet pacing behind the door, eagerly held back the Grand Duke.

The Grand Duke looked down at me and closed his mouth when he realized it.

Mirroring his surprise, I had also not realized earlier, but I was indeed wearing pajamas.

At the orphanage, I didn’t think anything was unusual even if I was only wearing pajamas and casual clothes.

“Where are you going?”

“I have to take her to choose an escort knight.”

Escort Knight! He’s the one who will keep me safe!

I immediately shook out of the Grand Duke’s arms and jumped to the floor.

“I‘ll come back with clothes!”

Dododo, Nina ran away.

I was excited to see who would protect me.

***

The place where I arrived, in the arms of the Grand Duke after changing into a pretty dress, was the practice hall of the Grand Duke of Baylot.

Where the Grand Duke’s Amethyst Knights train. This was where Wyndert and Deleign spent most of their time.

I wasn’t allowed to come here because it was dangerous, but I’ve seen many things through the windows of the mansion.

Even from a distance, I thought it was a really spacious and neat place, but when I looked at everything up close, it felt much more spacious.

I saw the footprints of the knights who had been running on the hardened floor.

“Ah, Shushu!”

Wyndert and Deleign, along with the knights, were all gathered in the training hall.

Deleign first tried to run toward this area when he found me.

I also tried to wave to them, but I saw that the thin Deleign was caught by a sturdy knight.

“We are training! Where are you going!”

“Ahhhhhhhhh! I just want to say hello to Shushu!”

Well, you were training.

I waved my hands toward Deleign’s back, then we started moving away.

Likely because he had learned a lesson from watching his younger brother, Wyndert looked at the Grand Duke, silently greeting him with his eyes. Then his gaze turned to me.

‘Are you alright?’

Like the Grand Duke who was worried because I didn’t come out in the morning, Wyndert also seemed to be worried.

I could see his eyes slightly calm down.

‘I have eaten!’

I moved my mouth and patted my stomach to tell him that.

Then Wyndert saw it and laughed. It was a refreshing smile.

Deleign made a noise and ran in my direction.

He’s the only person making a fuss.

All the knights in the training room were looking at this side in a very calm state.

“Well, everyone pay attention.”

The Grand Duke took me to the podium on one side of the training center and gathered the knights.

All of the knights ran over in an instant, they immediately formed rows and looked at the Grand Duke.

‘Awesome.’

No one stood out of line.

It turns out that you guys have really trained hard.

“You don‘t know my daughter, right?”

“Yes!”

“I’m trying to pick up a direct escort for Shuelina. Someone who will protect her outside the mansion. Is there anyone willing?”

My escort knight! I hope you are a good knight!

It would be nice if you were a strong knight and could save me right away from danger.

All of the knights were standing wearing light armor and well-maintained swords.

Everyone looked strong and competent.

‘No matter who will it be, I think they will help me well!’

I just admired their appearances and waited for the knights to respond.

‘Is there anyone who will volunteer for me?’

At the welcome party that everyone had held, I did a brief greeting with the knights.

They ran to help me on the night I was almost kidnapped as well.

However, it was not known whether there would be many people who would be my escorts voluntarily.

The method to raise the social standing of the escort knight depends on who the lord or lady he is protecting.

In the original work, I remember Azuela saying, ‘Who would like to escort a girl like you?’

It was said that Shuelina cried loudly. I burst into a fit of anger, saying, ‘What’s wrong with this female protagonist!’

I also waited for the response of the knights with a bit of excitement.

‘Even if no one volunteers, I shouldn’t be disappointed.’

I fully understood the knights’ position.

I’ve lived like a beggar apart from my precious lineage.

Besides, the knights didn’t even know my identity. I wasn’t even someone related to them.

‘So it’s a natural result.’

I was going to try to get along with the knights that the Grand Duke forced me to stick with.

As I thought so, while pressing my heart, the bottom of the platform became a little noisy.

“Be the Lady’s escort?”

“I could be stuck by her side every day!”

“I didn‘t know I was going to be an escort to a cute girl like her!”

“Rather than being a cute baby girl, our Grand Duke didn‘t have any daughter at all!”

When I listened to the gossiping words, surprisingly, the knights were very friendly.

Rather, everyone was loving me.

I don’t know if it’s good to love a young lady like me without any power, but even if it’s small compliments, I liked it.

Because it’s better to like me than to hate me.

There were some knights that felt sorry for me, who was almost kidnapped yesterday.

For the knights whose virtue was to protect their oaths and be loyal to their pledges, I thought I looked really cute.

Even at the welcome party, everyone was very displeased, saying, ‘How dare you try to kidnap a child, the lady we serve!’

“I will volunteer!”

“The same is true of me!”

“Pick me! “

Immediately, all the knights inside the training hall raised their hands and began to ask for them to be picked.

‘All’ the escort knights!