With The Lunatics - Chapter 11

Mark’s POV

“I’m scared that i would break hearts” i sadly said to Clay. “What do you mean?” “Clay just quit it, i know that you’re doing this because you feel guilty again for me. But please don’t give me false hopes.” I plead him. I understand him, he’s always like this. He couldn’t handle someone having feelings for him especially when He’s aware about it. Just like mine. My feelings for him. “I’m really sorry” he said looking down the floor. “I know, it’s alright” i replied. “I just feel bad you see, i don’t want to lose you, y’all are special to me” Clay said, emotions streaming down with every word he says. He’s so true. “I know, and we feel the same way to you” I assured him.

“I should get going now, if we have nothing to talk about” i said to him with a smile. “Thank you Mark, i really appreciate this” Clay responded. We left his room together. He guided me to their door. “So are we fine now?” He asked when we’re outside his house. “Of course! Why wouldn’t us?” I asked still smiling unto his face to shake his tension. “Oh yeah right” He smiled back. “See you tomorrow then” I said. “Yeah sure” He replied. And i set off, walking through the night. I sighed. Smiled. That idiot has really taken that kiss way too serious. I enjoyed it to be honest, but i know from the start what my boundaries about expecting from him. He’s oblivious to someone’s feelings except if you show them in front of him then things will get complicated for him. Imagine handing Clay an Orange rabbit and if he asks if that’s a rabbit, i’ll tell him that it’s a fish, then he’ll buy it. If you tell him that it’s a rabbit, he’ll wonder how did you bred it. He’s such a dumb person when it come to emotional attachments. Yep, he’s dumb sometimes.

As soon as i’ve reached home, i saw Jean right outside our yard. How long has she been standing there? She staring at the floor with a hint of confusion and shock in her face. What happened? Did Lynn and Jean fight? “Hey there!” I greeted her, he looked back at me still half conscious of my presence, it just looks like she sees through me. I waved my hand in her face then she came back to reality. “You okay?” I asked her. She doesn’t look right. Something’s wrong. “Oh mark” she hugged me. Why tho? What’s happening? “Care to tell me?” I inquired. “I’m in a real deep shit” she said, her voice shout a mixture of concern and sadness. “Come on let’s go inside, it’s cold in here” i said. We’ve gone inside my room. We sat in my bed, then i felt dejavu. “What’s it about?” I asked her kindly. “I-i don’t know w-what to do…Lynn” she stuttered herself. “Hey breathe okay? What about her?” I asked. Now i’m getting nervous. This must be really serious. “Promise me you’ll tell the truth?” She inquired. “Yeah sure, i always tell the truth” i said. “Did you know? T-that Lynn…that she’s into me?” Jean said, here eyes pleading for the truth. “What?! Are you being serious right now?” I asked. I was shook. Whatever i was expecting her to say, that’s not it. That’s the truth tho, i didn’t know.

“She…told me a while ago…at the tree house” Jean said, with a really dreaded look. Why is she sad then? “Okay, let’s say i already processed what you said earlier, but why are you sad?” I inquired. I mean, it’s a good thing that someone likes you, isn’t it? “I told her that i like Clay” she replied. I gasped. “What?” I’m not surprised by her feelings for Clay by the way, i knew it from the day she brought Clay with him at the tree house. She’s not that kind of person who brings men with us. She doesn’t even want to talk to one. “I’ve been hiding it from the start” jean said still sadly. “No, i wasn’t surprised by that you idiot, you’re quite obvious to be honest. It’s just that, why would you say it if Lynn said that she likes you?” I asked. “We both said who we like at the same time.” Jean explained. “Oh” that’s all i could say. Help me, someone please, this is a lot to process. A lot has happened just this night.

“I was so so dumb. Too insensitive, i mean it’s just right there in front of me, her motives and reactions shouts it. Why didn’t i took that for granted? I wouldn’t have hurt her.” Jean cried. She may be that harsh talking kind of person, but beneath her skin is an ever loving heart. “Hey it’s alright” i brushed her back trying to ease her from crying. “Maybe it’s just you’re too focused on Clay that you didn’t saw her coming for you” i added. Oh poor girls. “I didn’t signed up for any of this, and i love Lynn, she’s one of my best friend and i don’t want to lose her” jean said, still crying. “It’s alright, everything’s gonna be fine” i Hugged her tight enough to assure her that i’m by her side. She’s tendered now, but how about Lynn? Who would take care for her? But at this moment i couldn’t pick my phone to text or call her, that’ll make jean more awkward. I”ll with talk to her tomorrow. Yes, that’s right, tomorrow it is.

Clay’s POV

I sighed, but this time i sighed with relief. I don’t really know how this emotional feelings work with other people. I’m glad that Mark is cool with it. I don’t want this stupid feelings get into our friendship, they’re far too precious to lose. Yes sure, i’m quite a sentimental man you see. After losing a father, i don’t want any other person to lose. Of course i’ve been still in touch with my dad after all, but scars stays. Maybe that’s one of the reason why i’m kind of an anti social myself, i don’t want to open up for others and eventually lose them. I cannot afford to lose someone important, not anymore. I’m trying to be the best for everyone, that’s what i want to do right now.

Now i can sleep in peace. What a relief. I can freely move now, can’t i? The kiss, i don’t know why i did it, maybe because i got the comfort i needed from mark that time and with the heat of the moment, my body acted before my mind could process it. It wasn’t my intent actually, but at least it’s all resolved. I can at least ask Lynn out. Not now, but maybe someday, soon. I laid my back to my bed and was quickly a slumber to sleep. No more thoughts and worries. No more guilt. Everything’s going to be fine from now on, now i’m going to sleep. Freely sleeping.

“I love you Clay” mark said to me, directing his lips to mine. No, i don’t want to do it. I pushed him. “I’m sorry but i don’t love you” i plead. Into my surprise mark got pissed off. Suddenly there’s a gun in his hands. How? “Mark-” i said but he pointed the gun at me. If stare could kill, i’m already dead before the bullet hit me. He was raging. “Mark please…” i plead. But mark was still with his rage. Then it happened, as fast as i can blink, the bullet hit me right in my chest. I was falling. Falling continually but i can still see mark with Jean and Lynn by his side, slowly abandoning me. Mark looked back at my falling body with an evil smirk. I gasped. I breathed quickly. I sat up my bed, sweat marks evident in my shirt. It was just a dream. Yes, a dream. I was staring at the floor for a couple of minutes trying to calm myself. No, of course mark wouldn’t do such thing. Right, just a dream, that’s all. A dream. “Everything’s fine now” i convinced myself. It’s already 6:00 AM. Quite early but i don’t think going back to sleep is a good idea. I got up and took a shower.