Ye Chan - Chapter 148
Lin Zixi and Ye Can told a story similar to “causing a country”.
In the ancient eastern country, there was a naive and stupid king who met a favorite concubine who would ruin her life for the first time in a snowy night.
Lin Zixi held her cheeks, her expression indifferent as if she was telling Ye Can an irrelevant story. In the darkness, she looked at Ye Can’s shining eyes, and said softly: “I think that woman is the catastrophe of the emperor’s life.”
Like all clichés, the concubine beloved approached the king with a purpose. She enjoyed the favor given by the king, but under coercion and deterrence, she stretched out her life-killing claws and dragged the king to the abyss of destruction.
The relationship between them is the same as in the myths and legends between King Shang Zhou and Daji, King Zhou You and Bao Si.
For the sake of the so-called “love”, the king could not end well in the end.
This is the “disaster for the country”.
Lin Zixi seemed to just want to talk, and only said to Ye Can indifferently: “In my story with Ye Can, she is the king, and I am the’favored concubine’ who doesn’t know good or bad.”
So in order to have the next life, after death, she wandered in Wangchuan for many years, finally waiting for the chance to meet again.
“I made a deal with God. As long as I am willing to reincarnate in reincarnation, He will let me and Ye Chan come back into this world. God and I have reached an agreement. As long as I enter the reincarnation, I can still think of being with Ye Chan. Just allow us to be together.”
“So I and Ye Can meet again in this world. It’s just a pity that after the reincarnation, I was obliterated by the years, and then I forgot her. I didn’t think of it until two years ago.”
Lin Zixi chuckled and said lightly: “It’s just a pity that this is an ordinary world, without immortals and magic, and it can’t even prove the existence of gods, so I can’t prove the truth of all this.”
“I can only think that I might be crazy. Or, it’s just my imagination…”
In the dimly lit room, the blue light of the big screen was projected on Lin Zixi’s face, making her look weaker. She raised her head, looked at Ye Can and said softly, “What is reality? Memories, or everything I see in front of me? Is it my delusion or reality?”
“The more I want to seek the truth, the more I get lost? How should I get out of this vicious circle? Ye Can.”
Looking at the confused and fragile woman on her face, Ye Can only felt that her heart was crushed, and she couldn’t breathe suddenly.
Ye Can wanted to raise his hand, but finally pressed his patience, holding on to the arm of the chair and sighing as he said, “You have to distinguish this thing by yourself. You have to choose and believe in what you want to believe.”
Ye Can finally understood where Lin Zixi’s illness came from. Those confused memories swirl between reality and illusion, making it messy.
Everything that Lin Zixi said reminded Ye Can of what Dr. Yang and her own subconscious had made up, and the same thing happened in her subconscious as in Lin Zixi’s story.
Realizing this, Ye Can faintly looked forward to it.
She looked at Lin Zixi and said solemnly: “If something like this has really happened to you and Ye Can, then it should be time for the rain to pass and the weather to clear.”
“Even if the hand of destiny is pushing all this, playing tricks at every key node, but it can’t trick your heart. Next, what you have to do is choose.”
“Choose your own heart and go on without hesitation.”
Ye Can put his hand on the back of Lin Zixi’s hand, gently shook her hand, and said to her: “Even if the next moment is death, you have to live happily before you die.”
Lin Zixi felt the body temperature on the back of his hand, and responded to Ye Can’s words: “If I perish because of sorrow, and never recover, and wander in the abyss of despair, I will fall into the trick of fate, right?”
Ye Can nodded, Lin Zixi let go of the hand she was holding, and pressed her backhand against her palm: “The reason why fate is like this is probably because I want me to cry out of sorrow, and open my wound to watch my embarrassment. It’s unbearable, and it leaves the spectator in it either sad or happy, right?”
“If I really don’t exist in this world, but the same as I guessed, it may be the person in the story, and I can’t give in to it, right?”
Ye Can clasped her hand and shook her head: “It’s not like this, not just like this.”
“Even if you indulge in sorrow, even if you feel embarrassed, it’s all your own emotions. It’s just other people’s business that others want to watch and have fun with it.”
Ye Can’s speech speed gradually increased: “When a person is alive, whether it is true or false, it always exists in the eyes of others. It is observed, discussed, disseminated, and distorted.”
“But that exists in the eyes of others, and the most important thing is your own opinion. When you are not hurting others, what you do and what you should do is your own business. Only in this way can you find your own existence. Itself.”
“It’s like, this story is the same to you. It may be a disaster for others, but what does it look like for you? Are you a bystander, or are you in it?”
In the dimness, Ye Can’s voice was so clear. It was like a bell ringing in the fog of the night, guiding the lost traveler back home.
Lin Zixi had a little understanding, she replied softly: “For me, for me…”
At this moment, everything from the past and present lives endlessly tumbling in Lin Zixi’s mind, making her heart turmoil. Those details of the past are vivid, making her unable to distinguish the truth from the false.
Only the pain of losing Ye Can every time seemed so real in my heart.
Depression, hardship, sadness, sadness… all eroded Lin Zixi’s nerves.
Lin Zixi bit her lower lip, her eyes filled with sad light: “For me…that’s my life…”
“That’s my love… it’s my hate… it’s the longing for so many sleepless nights…”
“That’s not a story…”
“That’s I love you, Ye Chan.”
Ye Can didn’t know if the last name was given to her or to their past. But at this moment, Ye Can felt like he was inexplicably recognized.
She firmly held Lin Zixi and said to her softly: “Do you remember… As long as you remember, Ye Can in your heart exists. As long as she exists, I will be able to bring her to you.” .”
Ye Can probed into Lin Zixi’s forehead and said softly: “Lin Zixi, don’t worry, I will return your Ye Can to you.”
Lin Zixi closed her eyes, squeezed Ye Can’s fingers firmly, and shook her head vigorously.
No, it doesn’t need to be like that, she knows, in fact, her Ye Can has already returned. What they lack is just a phrase “start again.”
But they also know that when the memory is not equal, no one can speak and say that sentence.
Even if there is no way to speak, maintaining the status quo is already a great thing for them. Rather, the reunion between them was a miracle.
If there are so-called miracles in this world, then every time they meet is a miracle.
With light in her eyes, she wiped away the tears with her index finger, and sobbed: “I actually…I don’t know why, I will say these inexplicable things to you today.”
She continued to speak for herself: “Maybe I want to see you too much, but every time I see you, I don’t feel right. I hope you will remember it countless times, but you can’t.”
“It’s as if you are Ye Can, and you are not Ye Can.”
“I feel sad, but at the same time I am happy that you are alive.”
“In front of you, I can’t deceive my heart, because I do love you. Even now, it is the same. Because I love you, I hate this impermanent destiny.”
Ye Can nodded: “I understand how you feel.” She couldn’t understand it better, because even she herself hated her amnesia.
Lin Zixi wiped away her tears and grudgingly smiled at Ye Can: “But I can’t continue this way, right? If I continue this way, I won’t be able to get better next, so I need to change, and I want to be honest with you.”
She sighed lightly and said to Ye Can: “I still love you, and at the same time I greedily want the memories between us, and at the same time I want to make more beautiful things and be with you.”
Lin Zixi looked at Ye Can solemnly: “So Ye Can, can I have a hope?”
Ye Can hesitated for a while, and said to Lin Zixi, “Hope may be despair. If you don’t mind, of course you can.”
Lin Zixi smiled and said to Ye Can, “So, can we meet each other in the future? If you don’t come to me, I can go to you, right?”
Ye Can nodded: “Of course you can do this? Aren’t we friends before?”
Lin Zixi pondered his words, and said to Ye Can: “You know, it’s not just friends. Neither will I… treat you as a substitute, you’ve never been a substitute.”
“The reason why I am close to you is not only because you are the same person, but Ye Can is you, you are Ye Can. It feels a little bit off, but it has the same thing… Can you understand what I mean, right?”
Ye Can nodded: “I can understand.”
Ye Can continued: “This world makes people feel very lonely, but with you, I won’t feel lonely. You are the only person in the world who can connect with me.”
Lin Zixi smiled, she pointed to her heart, and said to Ye Can: “Once, before I met you, there was an open space here.”
“Even if I have friends and my own hobbies, I can’t fill this open space.”
“This is the loneliness that everyone is born with. Only after meeting you, it is never empty again. As long as I think of you, the world will no longer be empty. I… will never feel lonely anymore. .”
Lin Zixi stared at Ye Can, saying word by word: “I use’lover’ to describe you. Sometimes I think it’s too frivolous, but it’s not necessary, and it’s not serious enough.”
“Only calling your name, Ye Can, is enough to show how precious you are in my life and in the depths of my soul.”
“You are something I can’t lose… Ye Chan.”
“I would not survive without you, Ye Chan.”
Lin Zixi’s confession was so enthusiastic that Ye Can was stunned for a while. She looked at each other blankly, and then said for a long time: “But if you die, then I really won’t exist.”
Ye Can continued: “I think, one day I lose you, I will live well. You will live in my heart, always well…”
“The most terrible thing about death is: I will never see you again, and I will never remember you again.”
“I don’t want this, so I have to live well. I think you should do the same. Live well, with me in your heart, until death really comes.”
Lin Zixi had a different opinion. She smiled and said to Ye Can, “But that would be too tormenting. Ye Can, I have suffered enough.”