You Won’t Understand Me - Chapter 116

Zaria had a look of helplessness on her face. “Lu jie had said, if ladies in the older times could deliver even in their thirty-forties, why can’t I?” Zaria had a hand over her aching forehead, “Those times were different, Zeng and that doesn’t make it okay. She has been so stubborn about the baby and I am worried for them both.”

Zeng nodded, understanding the gravity of the situation. He had received cases in the Emergency Ward where older females who did not seek any medical help during their pregnancies had ended up with complications which were too late to handle.​​

“If you both wanted a baby, you should have tried instead of her,” Zeng added. A child was both parents’ responsibility and Zaria was the younger parent.

Zaria shook her head. “I don’t want to go through pregnancy. It’s not for me. Yes, I would love to be a mother but the pregnancy part scares me shitless.”

That was understandable too. Zeng himself was scared when he first saw a normal delivery in his undergraduate days.

“I am worried about her, Zeng,” Zaria said, her voice shaking, “What if something happens… either to her or the baby?”

Yes, there were possibilities but Zeng was sure with enough and proper medical attention, it would go well.

“Are her reports normal?” He inquired.

“Yeah, so far. It’s all good. I was worried about Down syndrome since Lu jie is past her thirties but the scans were fine. Anomaly scans were fine till date. Jie has gestational hypertension but that’s under control too. Surprisingly, everything is fine with Lu jie. The baby is fine too.”

That was positive news.

“She will be delivering at my hospital. I had talked with the gynaecology and obstetrics department. We have discussed everything with the HOD. If things come to the worst, we’ll have to do a Cesarean section.”

Zaria explained as she let out a breath. “I just hope everything goes well, Zeng.”

“It will,” Zeng reassured, wrapping his arms around her. It was a much-needed hug. Zaria had been stressed about it since before the pregnancy. Now that she had talked it out with a friend. As she had been Xuan Lu’s support system, at times, she needed a support system too.

‘I want you to be there with me when the time comes because I know I will lose my mind once she goes into labor.” Zaria requested, “Please, Zeng. Can you be with me at the time of her delivery? I know how busy you get but it’ll mean a lot.”

“Of course I can. You don’t have to ask.” Zeng kept hugging her.

Zeng knew that this woman had always been strong though she barely reached his shoulders. These were rare times when she was vulnerable and he had to protect her.

“I will be there, don’t worry. It’ll go well, Zeng said, patting her head. “Only four months to go now.”

Zaria gasped as if suddenly realising something.

“What if it’s preterm? Oh my God! What if we are stuck in traffic when we have to go to the hospital? What if I have to deliver her in the car? Oh my god!”

Zeng sighed. Here goes the overbearing wife. It took another hour for Zeng to calm Zaria down and make her think on the positive side of things.

Till then, Yul was busy asking curious questions like does it hurt when the baby moves, when will the baby arrive, will it hurt a lot, if babies have small teeth why don’t they eat, why are babies pink or blue, baby this baby that… the man had thousands of questions and Xuan Lu was trying to answer him the best she could.

=====

They left Zaria’s place with a promise to visit again.

“You are smiling,” Zeng pointed out the goofy smile on his boyfriend’s face as he drove them back.

“Oh, it’s just… the baby. I am excited for it,” Yul replied, pondering. “How is it gonna be? How will it look? Like Zaria jie or Lu jie or the donor perhaps. How small will it be?”

“Probably like Lu jie, she contributed to the IVF,” Zeng was sure the baby was going to inherit some of his biological mother’s traits.

“Then the baby is gonna be cute for sure, like Anna,” Yul said remembering their neighbour’s baby.

Yul shook his head. “It’s just going to be like all other babies, Yul.”

Yul sighed. “I want a baby too,” he said dreamily, looking ahead as he slumped in the passenger seat.

“I don’t have a uterus,” Zeng reasoned, shrugging. It was anatomically impossible.

“But some people don’t necessarily have babies from their womb, isn’t it right?” Yul tried.

Zeng knew the right term for it. “Ectopic pregnancies.” He also knew the complications of it. This boy Yul did not actually want him to get pregnant, did he?

“Those are highly dangerous, Yul. And even then, I can’t have a baby. My body is not meant for it.”

Yul’s face fell. He turned in his seat to ask. “Then how are we gonna have a baby?”

“Why do you even want a baby?” Zeng was starting to get irritated now.

“Because… why not? Everyone has a baby. Our neighbours do, my colleagues do, your friends will be having one soon.”

Zeng opened his mouth to counter but did not have a sufficient remark. “We are going to have a pet.” He tried.

Yul snorted a little. “Babies are different, Zeng ge.”

Zeng huffed. Was the family man in Yul coming out? That was possible.

Zeng subconsciously sped up. He wanted to reach home and get out of the car and just … get away from the probing questions all while Yul stared out of the window.

“I want that.”

The younger man said shortly, making Zeng glance at him.

“What?”

“Lu jie and Zaria jie, what they have, I want that.

Marriage, stability, children. All these went unsaid but Zeng grasped it.

“Don’t you?” Came another short question. Just two letters and Zeng already felt like he was suffocating.

Who wouldn’t want stability in their lives?

But the thing was that whenever Zeng had truly desired something, he was always stripped off of it in the end. He was always left heartbroken. That was his fate but Yul was different.

Now Zeng had some serious thinking to do.