You Won’t Understand Me - Chapter 127

What happened? Where did it go wrong? They were fighting again and whose fault was it?

It was supposed to be a perfect evening that Yul had so preciously planned which was now all ruined by Zeng’s unreasonable tantrum. It had always been like that. The man would shut himself off whenever he was bothered about something. Now too, there must be some reason behind Zeng’s hot temper. Yul knew there must be. But that did not give Zeng the right to treat him like this, like an outsider.

It made Yul feel like they were back to the stage when they had been in an unnamed relationship, where Zeng viewed him as a kid that was sticking around. But he was not a doormat, he was Zeng’s boyfriend, his lover, his partner for life.

Zeng began to leave and Yul caught his wrist, jerking him back so their eyes clashed in glares.

“That’s rich coming from you,” Yul said. “Lashing out at me without reason and expecting me to take it quietly, is that not annoying, Xiao Zeng?”

Zeng had had enough of people talking to him like he was the culprit. Back at the hospital, those goons were threatening to get his doctor’s licence cancelled. Here at his home, Yul too was trying to make him feel guilty. He was already stressed that his professional career was in danger, hence now was not the right time for personal matters to barge in.

“Wang Yul,” Zeng was so done with this. “All I am asking from you is to leave me alone.” He needed space to clear his mind and Yul was not giving him that.

“Really?” Yul mocked, “I thought you were trying to purposefully shut me out… like all the other times.” All Yul had asked for a few hours with Zeng after his job. Zeng wasn’t even able to give him that.

Zeng wordlessly gaped at him, “I don’t understand what you mean-”

“Of course, you won’t,” Yul laughed without humour, letting go of Zeng’s wrist, “You never understand. If you put in at least some effort into our relationship then you would. But I am the only one doing that. I was the one who begged you to stay and I still do so till this date. All I am asking is for you to show me, time and again, that you want this.” He signalled between them. “Us.”

Instead of mellowing down, Zeng was even more pissed. How dare he? How can Wang Yul say such a thing? Was Zeng’s love not reaching him?

“I have been giving my best,” Zeng raged, “What more do you want? Why are you not satisfied?”

Yul threw his hands in the air, “I have been compromising all this time. Can’t you see?!”

Zeng stilled but Yul continued the offence.

“I always have to settle for less so that I can stay by your side,” he said in the heat of the moment.

A sharp ache crossed Zeng’s heart. It was a deep blow.

It was happening all over again. All the things that he thought were stable in his life were slipping away. Everything was going wrong. Zeng was too lost to make it right.

“Then leave. Who’s stopping you?” He found himself saying.

Yul looked hurt when he saw him through stormy eyes.

Yul scoffed, not having an appropriate response to such coldness from Zeng.

“You are a selfish prick, Zeng ge.”

He walked away, grabbing the motorcycle keys. He slammed the door on his way out. Zeng didn’t even say a word as he left.

Yul was angry and he was hurt. He rode his motorcycle with rapidly increasing speed to he didn’t know where. He didn’t care if he broke a thousand traffic rules. He didn’t care if he drove himself to an accident. He didn’t care about anything. Right now, he was angry and frustrated and hurt and he wanted it to stop.

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Zeng took a deep breath and pinched the bridge of his nose.

It was probably one of the best days in a while.

He lost one patient today, almost lost another one. A road traffic accident involving drinking and driving brought in two emergency cases.

One of them was beyond saving whereas the other, the one who caused the accident had a better prognosis to living.

Though Zeng somehow managed to save this one, the patient’s condition worsened because of post-operative complications. Moreover, the relatives of this patient were some bigshot goons who refused to believe that a man who was apparently fine one second could be on his death bed the next. They made it out to be done out of malice. They had gone as close to grabbing Zeng’s collar.

He was terrified. He had done his best, he always did for each and every patient he got… just some things were out of everyone’s control. Medical science was not magic.

Zeng understood the relative’s sentiments however it was not the right way, nor was he the right person to take their frustration on.

Then Yul invaded his mind. Didn’t he do the same to Yul?

Misplaced frustration.

Though Yul’s words had cut him deeply, he too had hurt him.

They had hurt each other and it would definitely take some time to heal themselves. Though Yul’s compromising statement would make a home in his mind and haunt him for a while. Sure, Yul would apologize, because that’s how he was. Zeng too would admit his mistakes.

Not now though, he could deal with that later.

Zeng needed to rest after all the exhaustion weighing on his shoulders. While going to the room, he saw the decorations Yul had painstakingly put together. The sophisticated way Zeng liked. His favourite food laid on the table, scented candles and a bottle of fine, deep red wine.

He went closer admiring the work and efforts put into it. Yul must have put his heart into making this evening special. Zeng was already regretting the things he did and said to that precious man.

Right when he was about to leave, he saw the flowers set on the counter. He went closer to have a better look and his heart swelled.

A beautifully wrapped bouquet of red tulips, chrysanthemum, baby’s breath and orange blossoms.

Eternal love and a wish to marry, the bouquet told him with its vibrant flowers.

Zeng’s eyes welled up with tears.. He knew he fucked up real bad this time.