You Won’t Understand Me - Chapter 79

Xiao Zeng ran to the Emergency Ward as fast as he could. His vision blurred due to the emerging tears as he got near his destination.

He couldn’t think of anything else except that one person. All his senses started going numb; the sound from the background was no more audible. He could only feel his heart hammering against his chest as it sensed the fear of the worst.

Terrified, he reached the Operation Room. All the three Operation Theatres were occupied and had the name of the patients written on the respective boards outside them. The last two had the suffixes of Police titles labelled before their names. He found Yul’s name on the last one. He hurriedly went over.

A nurse coming out of the OT confronted him. “Sir, where are you going?” The nurse asked him to which he ignored and continued walking.

“Wait, Sir! You can’t enter.” A ward-boy held him by the arm. Crying, Xiao Zeng struggled to go in. “Let go.” He tried yanking his arm out of the hold but it lacked strength. “Please, let me go. I want to see him!” He cried frustratingly.

Dr Fanxing shortly reached there and held his Senior. “Sir, please calm down!” He tried restraining the taller man.

Seeing the struggle, more ward-boys came in. “There’s an important surgery going on, Dr Xiao. You cannot enter.”

“Let me go.” Zeng tried making his way out but his weakened body couldn’t overcome the restraining force.

“Please, let me see him.” He pleaded, crying.

“Please… Let me see him once. Please. I beg you.” His strength finally gave in as his legs weakened. He slumped on the floor, sobbing beyond control. “Please…”

Every person in the hallway of Emergency Ward went dead silent. Nothing could be heard except Dr Xiao’s painful cries.

All the hospital staff in there were shell-shocked to see a dignified Doctor like Dr Xiao Zeng, sobbing miserably on the floor.

The news of the commotion caused by Dr Xiao Zeng reached the Dean’s ears. He was immediately summoned to the Office.

Dr Jiang was furious.

“What kind of behaviour is this?” The Dean fumed. “Dr Xiao, you are a reputed surgeon in this hospital. Such a rash and indecent act don’t suit you. Disturbing the peace established in the hospital and interfering with the medical procedure! How can you behave this way? Is this the kind of example you set for the interns? Do you expect your Juniors to learn this? Dr Xiao Zeng, I am very disappointed in you.”

Zeng didn’t speak a word as Dr Jiang lashed out. He kept looking down at the white marble floor, his eyes red around the corners.

Dr Jiang could tell, Dr Xiao must be dealing with something that he did not know of and that was the reason he behaved in such a manner. However, as the head of the institute, he had to punish him.

“You are suspended for a week. Reflect on your actions and make sure such an incident doesn’t happen in the premises of this hospital.”

Xiao Zeng bowed in apology and left.

As he walked out of the Dean’s office, Zeng felt numb. His mind was distorted, his senses made him feel as if he was living a nightmare; the worst one.

‘Wang Yul… even after everything, why do you make me feel this way?’

How did he manage to invade Zeng’s defences? Zeng had wanted to avoid this situation; to see Yul injured once again but here he was mixing his professional and personal lives, feeling the pain that he always had wanted to avoid; fearing something that he never wanted for Yul… death.

Only he knew what he was feeling right now but he had to stay rational. He should not lose his mind to the chaos it was in. He must stay sane.

Zeng took a few deep breaths, calming himself. A doctor should be level-headed in any situation of emotional crisis. He should not give in to his emotions now. He himself knew he couldn’t put a brave front for long; soon he would break down… but not now. He must stay strong!

Adjusting his white apron and straightening his dishevelled hair, he directly went to his assigned cabin in the General Surgery department. After carefully folding his apron, he placed it with his stethoscope. He locked everything after taking his ATM, cheque book and some extra cash available.

As he came out of his cabin, all his colleagues eyed him with weird looks but he didn’t even take any notice as he had other important tasks, particularly an important person, on his mind.

Hurrying himself to the reception desk, he completed all the formalities for Yul’s surgery and paid the required hospital fees as fast as he could. He had to get back to the Emergency Ward.

While he was signing the last document, Dr Jiang came in through the hallway along with a few of his subordinates to go for a meeting. He saw Dr Xiao Zeng and stopped to inquire. Zeng politely bowed to him.

“You are supposed to be suspended. Why are you still here, Dr Xiao?” The Dean asked.

Zeng nodded, “Yes, sir. I am aware but I am not here as Dr Xiao. I am here as Xiao Zeng, a common citizen. The patient is an important person to me, Sir. I must stay.” He replied politely.

Dr Jiang sighed seeing the determination in Xiao Zeng’s eyes. “Well… I can’t stop you from accessing your rights as a citizen. Also, I won’t be invading your privacy by asking about the concerned patient but I hope they get well. Also, during your suspension, I hope that you will be reflecting on your actions because I expect better things for you, Dr Xiao.”

Zeng knew his senior had good intentions for him. He should not have let his emotions take the better of him but everything fails when it comes to Yul. It was as if all of Zeng’s rationality and control vanished with one news about his ex-boyfriend. This was one of the things Xiao Zeng hated, not being in control of his own thoughts, which Yul so easily invaded.

“Yes, Sir. I will be careful.” He bowed to his senior.. “I apologise for the trouble.”