You Won’t Understand Me - Chapter 90

The next morning, as Yul woke up, he didn’t find Zeng around him. His eyes found it difficult to focus on figures but he could feel that Zeng was not there. He was about to panic when his mother came into view.

“Where’s Zeng ge?” He hurriedly asked.

“He is resuming his duty from today. So he left as soon as we arrived,” Mrs Wang replied.

Hearing the answer, Yul sighed in relief.

The General Surgery department and the General Male Ward were in the same block of the hospital but on different floors. Zeng found it beneficial so that he could go to Yul’s Ward whenever he was off duty without having to go to another block. That early morning, Zeng had come back from his apartment in formal clothes and met the Dean.

Dr Jiang handed him his resume. Zeng assured his senior that this behaviour wouldn’t happen ever again.

As he was going to his cabin after a week of suspension, the staff in the General Surgery department started whispering and eyeing him curiously.

First, his emotional breakdown in the Emergency Ward and second, his supposed affair with Dr Meng Zaria. Zeng had sure been the hot topic for the entire hospital to gossip about.

If it were a week before, he might have felt belittled and would also have kept his head low. But now it didn’t matter or even better, it didn’t bother him anymore.

Upon entering his cabin, he cleaned the entire small room which had been unused for the past seven days.

He put on the white coat and wore the stethoscope around his neck. He called his junior intern and asked for the details that he had missed during his suspension period. No matter what happened in his personal life, it shouldn’t be reflected upon his job. Once he wore the white apron, he was a doctor and nothing else.

During his breaks, he would visit Yul. It continued for a few days, then Zeng requested Yul’s parents to go back to their hometown as they had left everything as it was and came here. There was nothing that they could do staying here as Yul would be sedentary for two more weeks. If needed, they could come back after he would get discharged. Yul also seconded the thought. He did not want to unnecessarily burden his parents.

The old Wang couple agreed, leaving behind many many instructions and promising that they would come back to take care of him after he got discharged.

From then on, Zeng took care of him in all aspects. He would assist Yul in changing his clothes and sponge bathing. He would regularly check the condition of the stitches and apply topical antibiotics.

He visited Yul whenever he had any free time during his duty hours and for the whole night. Sleep, for now, was a foreign concept to him. If things were at their best, he would be lucky to get two hours of continuous sleep before his body would jerk up again, following a nightmare.

There were times, like today, when he would bring his lunch from the canteen to Yul’s bed due to insufficient break time.

They both would often talk about various things but Zeng would always be careful not to mention anything about their relationship. They must discuss it only after Yul’s complete recovery.

“I also want to eat,” Yul said out of the blue, staring at the egg roll that Zeng had been munching on.

“You can’t. Your intestines are still recovering,” Zeng said, taking a bite again and Yul felt that the doctor was torturing him on purpose.

“Won’t I die if I don’t eat?” He questioned, knitting his eyebrows together.

Zeng shook his head in negation, “We are supplying you everything that your body requires through venous route by saline. So no, you won’t die.”

Yul rolled his eyes and huffed. “I also want to walk,” Yul said, glancing longingly out of the window. “It has been days since I had gone outside.”

“You have injured your leg muscles so you can’t walk. The wound in your abdomen it’s still recovering, so you shouldn’t move any part of your body except your arms.” Zeng explained for the nth time, gulping down his meal.

“Oh god! I hate hospitals!” Yul whined.

“And I hate it when you are admitted to the hospital.” Zeng blurted out meeting Yul’s eyes. He then averted his eyes when both of them went silent and bit his lip to avoid slipping off any more words than he could afford.

Finishing the egg roll and throwing the wrapped in the small dustbin near Yul’s bed, he quickly changed the topic to something else,

“Weren’t you wearing a bulletproof vest during the encounter?”

Yul nodded, “I was but those bastards were using AR-15. It’s all money game. They had funding. They are associated with some big underworld gangs which range back to other countries. We were so close to catching them but it messed up.” He breathed out. “I lost a comrade.” He had seen his colleague die on the spot in front of his eyes before he himself was shot.

Zeng saw the guilt in his eyes. “It wasn’t your fault, Yul. No one is blaming you. Your colleague died for a cause. Despite the great loss, his family must be feeling proud of him. He died a noble death.”

Zeng wanted to comfort him but was baffled by the words that Yul said next,

“Would you also feel the same if I had died, Zeng ge?”

Yul looked right in his eyes, trapping him in them. He wanted to know, he wanted a genuine answer.

Zeng’s hands trembled visibly. The weight of Yul’s words was so strong that one more second and he would break down to pieces. His phone beeped in the meantime, signalling to go back to his department.

“I need to go.” He immediately got on his feet and walked away without looking back. With each step, the pain in his chest pulsed up to his eyes, from which tears threatened to fall.

Yul, too, felt a similar pain but not from his injuries. This pain was much worse and wouldn’t be lessened by any medications.. The only person who could lessen it had just walked away.