Your Eternal Lies - Chapter 72

“Please give me a second of your time, Miss.”

 

A few days later, it was neither Joshua Gregory nor the handsome soldier with gray eyes who called to me at the market. It was another soldier, with blonde hair and blue eyes.

 

I had seen him with the handsome soldier a few times.

 

He looked a little younger than his friend.

 

“What’s your name?”

 

“Rosen Haworth.”

 

I didn’t know why he was stopping a little slum girl like me, but I answered anyway.

 

He crossed his arms and glanced down at me with a skeptical look.

 

“Are you married?”

 

“Yes.”

 

“If you purposely call yourself a married woman because you’re scared that a soldier is interrogating you, stop it. I won’t hurt you, so answer me properly. You said you were 17. What marriage happens at 17 years old?”

 

His tone of voice, which seemed certain that I was lying, was so bad that I shot back with a raised eyebrow.

 

“What are you saying? I got married when I was 15. I went to the government office and registered it.”

 

“…Are you really a married woman? Really? You’re not lying?”

 

He stammered at my firm answer. He seemed to be taken aback. I nodded in bewilderment.

 

“Haworth is your husband’s surname?”

 

“Yes. Hindley Haworth, who runs the treatment center, is my husband.”

 

I looked at the soldier, waiting for a check to follow after identification. But the only thing that came back was a few silly questions like ‘Really?’

 

I glared at the dumb soldier who could hardly understand what I was saying and tried to step away. I guessed he just wanted to pick a fight with a local girl. But he caught me again.

 

“My name is Henry Reville.”

 

‘So what?’

 

“You know my boss, right?”

 

‘How would I know your boss?’

 

“Black hair and gray eyes. A really handsome guy.”

 

But I realized who his boss was at the description. He was so noticeable that I didn’t need a long explanation. I answered with a slight deflection.

 

“…I’ve run into him a few times.”

 

“His name is Ian Kerner. He is my boss, you know…”

 

Ian Kerner.

 

Only then did I know the name of the soldier who helped me. The reason why this soldier named Henry Reville caught me was because of something related to him. So I couldn’t step away and stood there like a statue.

 

“My boss… he is sick.”

 

“Sick? Why?”

 

‘Is that why he hasn’t been in town for the last few days?’

 

My voice rose without realizing it.

 

It was a strange thing.

 

His illness had nothing to do with me.

 

“His heart hurts… No, it sounds like he has a headache. Anyway, either the heart or the head, one of the two is definitely hurting.”

 

Henry Reville spoke gibberish. He wanted to say something, but he seemed to be spiraling.

 

I stood still, listening to his nonsense.

 

I didn’t understand why I was doing this either.

 

“Sometimes it seems crazy, and sometimes it seems painful… Anyway, that’s about it-”

 

“So what’s the point?”

 

“So! My boss is sick! I hope you know that!”

 

“…”

 

“Next time you run into my boss, can’t you say I talked to you? Because I came here on my own, all on my own.”

 

I tried to move away again with a restless mind.

 

If he was sick, it would be hard to run into him for a while. I should be glad, but it felt weird.

 

But Henry Reville grabbed my hand again and held out a piece of paper with something written on it.

 

“Hey, hey, don’t go. Wait a minute.”

 

“…?”

 

“If you need help, come here. As it says.”

 

“I can’t read.”

 

Henry grimaced at my remark.

 

“Then I’ll tell you. Remember it, okay? The third building in the military unit over there. Show them this note and tell them you know Henry Reville, they will let you in. Find Ian Kerner.”

 

“Help? What are you trying to help me with?”

 

“Anything.”

 

“…”

 

“If you say you need help, he’ll help you with anything.”

 

Because the soldier spoke in a really plain voice, I didn’t quite understand what was going on until I got home.

 

When I told Emily what had happened in the marketplace, and saw her pale face, I realized.

 

What the note meant. It was a very obvious and common proposition.

 

“Rosen, don’t ever go. Do you know what that means? Throw away the note.”

 

“…”

 

“Even if rations are cut off forever, as long as there is a treatment center, we can feed ourselves. I won’t let you starve. Understand? Don’t go even if Hindley tells you to.”

 

I remembered how soldiers played with married women in town. Of course, there were cases where the two met eyes, but there were more cases where there was a price, as in, material transactions. Even more so after the disruption of the supply route to Leoarton.

 

As expected, I must have been looking at the world too naively.

 

I felt pathetic and despised myself for feeling a little bit excited at the note. I didn’t know, and my heart warmed over the hand warmer he handed me, him picking up the laundry, and following me around.

 

That day, Hindley returned from drinking. And how fate twisted; he only hit Emily, even though I blocked Emily and hung on to his trouser leg. I was beaten too for a while and then returned to the kitchen to soak my bruises in cold water.

 

I tried to burn it, but eventually I just held the note and looked at it for a long time.

 

Sometimes disgusting and dirty work was needed. There were not many ways for the powerless to protect themselves. And I wasn’t a good kid, unlike Emily. I was a very grumpy child who would do anything dirty to get what I wanted.

 

What’s wrong with that?

 

The world was a mess anyway, and there were people who did more than I do.

 

This was a deal anyway.

 

I use him, he uses me.

 

Maybe it’s the neatest way.

 

* * *

 

The day Emily was locked in the warehouse, I ran out of the house while Hindley was asleep, carrying the note I had been hiding safely. The memory of being recaptured by Hindley at the ticket office was still vivid.

 

If you try the same way, you will get the same result.

 

I needed another way.

 

And all that came to mind was extreme. I ended up choosing between bad and worse.

 

I ran through dark alleyways to the military unit.

 

Henry Reville did not brag. The soldiers with pistols watched me timidly approach with wary eyes, but their attitude changed when I handed over the note from Henry Reville. They saluted politely, opened the door, and escorted me safely to Ian Kerner’s office.

 

Even though it was late, Ian Kerner’s office was lit. Staring at the light leaking through the crack in the door, I took a deep breath and opened the door without knocking. He looked up, as he was reading something at his desk.

 

His eyes met mine. He got up from his seat with surprised eyes. I didn’t have the ability to read minds and he seemed good at hiding his feelings, but at that moment I was able to read his thoughts easily.

 

‘Why on earth is she here? At this hour? Why?’

 

And a strange emotion washed over his face for a moment.

 

Happiness.

 

Happiness to see me.

 

It was funny to suggest such a dirty deed and pretend to be innocent. Still, I decided to hinge everything on that one emotion. I gripped the note in my hand more tightly, and stared at him with baited breath.

 

“Please allow me to sneak on the train. Me and one other person. I have to run away.”

 

“…”

 

“Then I’ll sleep with you. I can do whatever you ask me to do.”

 

I held out the note in my hand to him. His expression hardened in an instant. He roughly snatched the note from my hand and read it. He asked in a subdued voice.

 

“Who gave you this?”

 

He seemed angry.

 

He was such a funny guy. Who’s supposed to be angry right now?

 

“Your assistant. Henry Reville.”

 

“How did you get here?”

 

“I came on foot. Do you think I flew?”

 

He stared at me with an expression of uncertainty. Then he locked the office door and dragged me to a chair. I read the room.

 

‘Does that mean you’re going to do something because the door’s locked?’

 

I swallowed dry saliva and prepared my mind.

 

But he didn’t do anything.

 

Just sitting across from me and staring at me for a long time. He finally broke the silence.

 

“You have to talk to get help.”

 

“…”

 

“What’s going on? What do you mean, run away?”

 

There was a surge of irritation.

 

Doesn’t this guy know what a deal is?

 

It’s over if you give and take. I didn’t have to recite a long story to him. I’d done enough of that before. It’d been a long time since I realized that it doesn’t work the simple way. I didn’t want to waste my energy on what I couldn’t do anymore.

 

“Please get me a train ticket to Malona.”

 

“Tell me first what’s going on.”

 

“Why does that matter?”

 

“Did you kill anyone?”

***