Your Love For Mine - 40 Drafted

Lunch break.

Just as I was done copying the notes I needed, the bell rang to signal the end of my free period, and the start of our lunch period.

This is the beginning of my battle.

I’m going to try to fix things with Nick and Sig.

While copying Scarlet’s notes, I thought of possible ways to make it up to them.

The results?

Nothing.

I couldn’t think of any surefire ways to fix this.

After all, I have no idea how much of that stuff they believed in the first place.

Those two didn’t even bother showing up yesterday. How could I possibly understand what they’re thinking?

But… I’ve decided that it’s fine this way.

I just need to try my best to win them back.

Scarlet might have used the campaign as an excuse, but she probably feels guilty about this situation too.

I can’t imagine how much all of this is weighing on her. She’s too much of a saint for feeling responsible for all of this.

But that’s all the more reason to put all of this behind us.

Before I can even think of fixing my reputation, I’ll need to fix my relationships. That includes Nick, Sig, and Scarlet herself.

Once I arrive at the cafeteria, I quickly survey the area and find that they’re sitting at our usual table.

It’s not exactly a hard-to-find table anyway. No one else usually wants to sit with us so it always looks emptier than the surrounding tables.

“…”

That’s kinda depressing now that I think about it…

Oh well.

That empty table is where my friends are. So even if it looks lonely, it’s still where I feel the most at home.

Which is precisely why I need to do this.

After taking a deep breath to calm myself, I focus on walking straight towards them.

During this simple act, I can’t help but feel unusually confident.

Just yesterday, confronting them like this would have been such a difficult thing for me to do.

I felt so beaten and hopeless that I ended up running away from the classroom the moment everything got out.

But I feel empowered right now.

It’s like, having just one person believe in me is giving me the strength to push forward.

It’s understandable though. The difference between one and zero is as grand as the universe, and it makes a world of difference to me.

“…”

Before I realize it, I’ve already arrived at their table.

And like a campfire in the rain, my strength quickly fizzles away.

In its place is this sudden budding fear of failure.

There they are.

Sig and Nick.

Heads down in their phones as they slowly go at their lunch as usual.

It’s the kind of scene I’ve gotten used to seeing these past few weeks.

“Dude, this event is such a grind. I feel like a slave whenever I play this game.”

“You should try Dragalia, Nick-kun. It’s pretty fun. I’ll do your grinding in the meantime”

“Should I? Pass me your phone, let me see.”

The two swap phones and continue on as usual.

It’s home.

There’s no other way to describe it.

I used to be right next to them.

Just calmly eating my lunch while listening to their inane video game rambling.

But now, it feels like I’m staring off into a world that I’m no longer a part of.

Do I belong here anymore?

Will they accept me?

What should I even say here?

It feels like the longer I think about it, the more I feel like giving up.

Once again, my fear of failure is keeping me firmly planted in the ground.

“Woah, not bad! These characters are sick!”

“Right?! I knew it was a 10/10 game the moments I saw those waifus.”

“Dude, play for the story at least…”

This is so miserable.

I need to push myself harder.

I’ll just say something, anything.

I just need to get my feet wet here.

And so, I clear my throat, and…

“A-ahem. H-hey guys. Nice weather, huh?”

“…”

“…”

The moment I speak up, they both fall into silence.

They halt tapping at their phone screens as if time had frozen in place.

For a moment, Nick looks up at me like I’m some kind of idiot.

“Uh… hi Nick.”

I’m so confused right now. What do I say?

Sig on the other hand, doesn’t make eye contact at all.

He’s just continuing his mobile gaming as usual.

And after a while, Nick does the same.

“… Hey Sig, did you hear something?”

“Shiranai. Must be the wind or something.”

What the…

You just looked me dead in the eyes, Nick!

“Are you guys seriously just going to ignore me from now on, then?”

“…”

“…”

Okay, two can play at that game.

“I guess if you guys don’t see me then you won’t mind if I take a seat, right?”

“We would.”

“…”

“Is what I would say, if I could hear anything right now.”

Nick is so damn unfair, dude.

It’s obvious that at the very least, he wants nothing to do with me right now.

I can’t gauge how Sig feels though. Much like always, he seems to only be interested in going along with whatever Nick’s doing.

Either way, unless I can do something about the tension in the air right now then nothing’s going to get fixed.

“Well, that’s fine. We don’t need talk, you just need to listen. I guess… I just wanted to tell you guys about yesterday. Y’know, about how I ran off and all…”

“…”

“I should have explained everything right then and there. I get that I should have, but… it was kinda hard for me. When people start talking about you like that it’s just like… I dunno. Even if it isn’t true, it still made me feel really uncomfortable. You know, that so many people would say such bad things about me and all. I guess I just didn’t know if you guys would believe those rumors or not, and-”

“Hey Sig. The wind’s getting kinda loud. Wanna go eat in a classroom instead?”

“Ah, sure man. There’s better wifi over there anyway. The cafeteria connection has way too many people on at once.”

The two of them stand up with their trays in hand and begin walking off from the table.

Just like that.

Without acknowledging anything I said.

“…”

What can I even do about that?

Just keep on trying?

This is humiliating.

That they’d just up and leave without listening to what I have to say feels pathetic.

Not because they’re ignoring me like this.

No, what’s pathetic is that I thought they were different.

Different from the rest of these people.

Yeah, I’m sad. But more than that, I’m disappointed.

“I expected better from you guys.”

They both stop in their tracks.

“…”

“…”

“I always thought of you guys as better people than this. You especially, Nick. You’re always going on about how important trust and friendship is, but when one rumor about me starts up you go and completely ignore me like this? Aren’t you just a hypocrite?”

“A hypocrite..?”

“Damn right. What the hell is all of this? You think you’re entitled to acting like this just because your feelings got hurt a little? So what, am I not worth talking it over with? Is that it? Do you think you’re just that much better than me?”

I sigh.

“You know what? It’s whatever, dude. I don’t care anymore. If you want to ignore me over something like this then you can go ahead. Be my guest. It’s just nice to finally know that you really are as petty as those “thots” you hate so much.”

I grimace, then turn back to the food queue.

“TNT, I guess.”

I walk away without waiting for a response.

Sorry, Scarlet. I know I should have been more diplomatic here, but…

As shameful as it is to admit–

Uttering those words felt really good.

It might not have been the right thing to do, but I’m glad I finally took a stand against all the awful things that have been happening to me.

If you’re going to pretend I don’t exist, then that’s fine.

I won’t beg for your forgiveness.

I’ve already decided to fight, so I’ll get those votes. With or without you.

“You are so full of shit, you know that Chase?”

This time, I’m the one who stops in his tracks.

“You think I’m petty? You think that after everything you’ve been doing this week, ignoring you is petty?”

This guy…

“What, are you gonna tell me I’m wrong?

“DAMN RIGHT you are. What the hell kind of half-assed apology was that? Did you think I’d just go ‘oh no prob man it’s all good’ and we’d be friends again? What a fucking joke!”

At this point, Nick’s voice has elevated to the point where it’s starting to attract unwanted attention our way.

But at this point, I’m too pissed off to care.

“You really don’t get it, do you Nick? Why should I even have to apologize in the first place?! Of course I’d feel shitty about all of these fake-ass rumors! It’s your fault for not asking me if they’re real or not!”

“OF COURSE THEY’RE NOT REAL!”

“… Wha?”

I freeze up.

“Who the hell would believe any of that crap, huh? You? A womanizer? HAH. You’re way too spineless for something that badass!”

This guy…

“You think I care what a bunch of bottom feeders have to say about my brother? Hell no. I know you better than any one of them do. And I know first-hand that if anyone actually bothered to get to know you, they’d trust and love your dumbass just as much as we do. And if they’d rather gossip than actually get to know you, then screw them! They’re not worth it! Actually, you know what? Screw everyone in this school! I’ll say it proudly! The ‘Fated Ones’ doesn’t give a damn about your shitty politics! We’re better than every single one of you assholes! Screw your lies! Screw your drama! Screw every single one of you! And screw you too, Chase!”

Before I could realize it, he suddenly lunges towards me.

There was no time to react.

All I can do is grit my teeth.

And, after a second passes, the world goes black.

My eyes had shut themselves on reflex.

When I open them again, everything has changed.

My vision is blurry, and there’s burning pain spreading across in my right cheek.

For some reason, I’m on the ground.

What just happened…?

Did he… punch me?

“Where the hell did you go when you skipped class on Monday, huh?! Why do you keep so many damn secrets?! I don’t know about Sig, but I’m sick of it! We’re your brothers! We care about you! We’re idiots, yeah, but… even for idiots like us, it’s so damn obvious that you’re hurting!”

Nick…

“Stand up!!! You’re a man, aren’t you?! You’re a member of the ‘Fated Ones’, aren’t you?!”

“You little…!!!”

I jump up from the ground and swing my own fist at his face.

“!!!”

Unable to react to my surprise attack, he gets knocked to the ground the moment my punch connects with his cheek.

“Shut UP!!”

I’d normally be embarrassed to scream like that, but the burning fire in my chest is making me ignore everything other than my own rage.

“You don’t know how awful it felt to be made fun of in that room! Why am I the bad guy here?! Why am I being guilt-tripped into apologizing to my friends and then getting ignored on top of it?! Isn’t that messed up?! If you wanted to know all of those things then you could’ve just asked! And if I don’t want to tell you, then that’s that! You’re not the victim here, dammit! You’re not entitled to anything here!”

“Dammit Chase!!!”

I’m still groggy from his punch, but he’s already standing back up.

“We’re… we’re your bros, dude! Of course we wanna help you when you’re going through some bad shit! But if you don’t wanna talk then that’s fine… I’ll just have to beat the words out of you!”

Seems like he wants some more.

That’s fine on my end too.

I won’t be satisfied until I get another clean blow in.

I lower my body to prepare for his attack.

“GrrAAAH!”

Nick springs toward me one more time with his fist reeled back.

As I had been anticipating his straightforward attack this time, I jump forward in retaliation and catch his arms in my grip before he can swing.

“Wha-”

Then, using my momentum from the jump, I push and pin him down to the ground.

“Ugh!”

“This is for ignoring me!”

I swing at his face.

The collision causes the sound of my fist against his cheek to echo through the room.

“Ghh!”

He lets out a sharp exhale from the pain.

There’s no point in me going any further.

It’ll just take things way too far.

But still, the anger inside of me hasn’t subsided.

My rage has not been satisfied.

I still feel betrayed.

“I was just starting to believe in you guys… I was just beginning to enjoy the world the way you two did. So… why the hell would you pull a stupid stunt like this?”

“…”

“Yeah, it’s my fault, right? I don’t talk to you guys about anything that’s going on with me, do I? Of course you’d feel l like I don’t actually trust you. Of course you’d think that I don’t actually see you as my friends. But still, why didn’t you say anything if you felt that way, then?”

“…”

“I love you two idiots. Don’t just ignore me when I need you, dammit…”

“Haha, you finally said it…”

He spits at my face.

“Ack!”

My vision is obscured for a brief moment as some of it lands just above my eyes.

The liquid slowly drips down my face and along corners of my vision.

There’s some red in there… Is he bleeding?

My eyes refocus, but by the time I realize it, it’s too late.

While I’m wiping the saliva and blood off of my face, he takes the opportunity to slam his fist into my stomach.

A familiar sensation reverberates through my body.

“Haaa…!!”

I gasp for air.

It hurts.

Goddamn, it hurts.

“You…!!”

But before I can recuperate, he shoves me off of his body.

“Ugh…”

I roll over and clutch my stomach in pain.

“Ghhh…”

Ah crap, why do I keep getting hit in the stomach?

That punch seriously knocked all of the adrenaline and anger right out of me.

“…”

But now that I’m not blinded by rage, I take notice of the large crowd that’s formed around the two of us.

There’s murmurs and even laughter among the students who are looking over at us.

What on earth did the two of us just do…?

We’re a laughing stock right now…

It takes most of Nick’s strength to sit up. I didn’t exactly hold back on those punches, so his brain must be a mess right now.

Even still, he smiles while looking down at my beaten body.

“Heh, I win…”

“What? No way… You’re barely conscious dude.”

“Haha, yeah? At least I can move. You look like you’re in too much pain to even stand up.’

“Nah, I can stand up… You’ll just fall over though.”

“Oh yeah? I’ll take you up on that…”

He takes up the challenge and pushes against his legs to pull himself back up to his feet.

I, on the other hand, slowly drag my body into a kneeling position while clutching my stomach. I don’t feel like I can stop hunching my entire body forward, so the whole process is much more taxing than usual.

Neither of us stands up right away.

Due to our respective physical limits, we can only slowly brings ourselves up to our feet.

Eventually though, we both make it up.

“See? You can do it if you try.”

“Do it…?”

“Tell us how you feel, man. You kept pretending everything was fine when you told us about you and Scarlet yesterday, right? But you were way too obvious about it.”

“… Did I really look that bad?”

“You looked like you just came from burying your dog.”

Seriously…?

“Look I… we’re sorry for ignoring you, okay? But next time, just tell us how you feel. Otherwise, as the leader of the ‘Fated Ones’, I swear I’ll kick everyone’s asses until they apologize for making my friend feel bad.”

“…”

His words were like a weight off my shoulders.

Suddenly, everything that felt hard and complicated evaporates into thin air.

And all that’s left is my appreciation of my friends.

Honestly, what the hell is wrong with me…?

I really couldn’t trust… someone as amazing as this, huh?

Just how fucked in the head am I right now?

“Yeah… you’re right… My bad.”

I shake my head to refocus my senses.

When my vision comes to though, I find that not only Nick and myself, but is Sig are suddenly being approached by one of teachers who happened to be nearby.

Oh no.

I was too upset to notice, but.

This is actually really bad.

More than that, things might already be over for me.

Forget my reputation, having an all-out fight in the middle of the cafeteria was basically social suicide.

But more than that, if I get suspended here, I won’t even be able to participate in the elections.

What should I do…?

“You two, what was all of that just now?”

He utters the words sternly as soon as he stops in front of us.

I can’t lie here, but I need to squeeze out a response. Something to soften the blow, anything.

“A-ah, just a little horseplay, sir. No big deal.”

“Horseplay? That didn’t look like horseplay to me.”

He looks down at his watch.

“Well, that doesn’t matter. Blatant violence while disrupting everyone’s lunch, I think you two need to come with me to the principal’s office. Right now.”

A wave of anxiety washes over me the moment he says the words ‘principal’s office’.

I clench my fists.

Dammit.

It’s over.

I messed up.

“Come on, Chase. Let’s just get this over with.”

Oh Nick… you have no idea how much I screwed myself, huh?

“I’ll come too. Maybe I can help you guys out.”

“Sig…”

Ah, screw it.

It doesn’t matter anymore.

Who cares about my reputation anyway?

As long as I have these two, I’m sure my high school career will be fine.

I don’t need to beat Jennifer.

She can do whatever the hell she wants.

All I need are my friends.

“… Sure, let’s go.”

I’ll just deal with this, then I can get back to my normal high school life.

One without drama or elections.

“Wait!”

But before I could even take a single step forward, I hear someone yelling out from behind me.

“Huh?”

And just as I turn to see who it came from, a stream of red hair flashes past my view.

She stands firmly between the three of us and the male teacher.

“Leave… leave them alone…”

She clenches her fist and stares straight at the teacher, who is currently towering well over her small figure.

“T-they didn’t mean any harm. Their playing just got a little… out of hand.”

“…”

The man doesn’t seem too impressed with Scarlet’s sudden undermining of his authority. He glares at her for a moment before releasing his gaze to check his watch.

“I’ve already made my decision. These two are heading to the principal’s office and that’s that. Or what, would you like to take their place?”

“I will.”

No hesitation.

She answers without even blinking.

Scarlet, just what…

“He cheated on you and you’re still defending him?!”

This time, the voice comes from the large crowd of onlookers that have formed around us.

“She must really love him, eh? Hahaha!”

“…”

The jeers from the crowd are only making the situation worse for her.

Her hands are shivering.

There’s goose-bumps all over her slender arms…

And she still answered that teacher without hesitation.

She won’t last.

I can tell right away that this is already too much for her.

She’s might have an attack at any moment.

I need to stop her.

“Scarlet.”

“It’s fine, Chase.”

“…”

I reached out to her with my hand, but her words stopped me in my place.

Once she does, she turns back to the crowd.

“Yeah, I do love him that much. He could kiss every girl in this school and I’d still forgive him. If none of you have ever tried getting to know him then you have no right to judge either of us.”

“…”

“…”

The onlookers, the teacher,

Nick, Sig

And especially myself.

We’re all stunned.

She openly says that it’s okay.

It’s okay if I cheated on her.

She says I’m worth that kind of heart break.

Even if it isn’t true…

Even if it’s just for publicity…

Rachael’s words still ring at the back of my head.

“Chase, that girl is in love with you.”

Is that why she’s going so far…?

Because if so… then…

“Talk to ’em Scar!”

Someone from the crowd of onlookers sitting at their lunch table screams out.

Quickly, the crowd erupts into cheers and screams.

I…

I don’t believe it.

They loved it…

They loved her determination.

That’s Scarlet for you. Even in a tense situation like this, she’s ever the actress.

Everyone seems to have completely bought it.

“Hahaha damn, Chase is a lucky guy huh?”

Geez, this girl…

I turn back to the teacher.

He seems to be checking his watch again.

“I change my mind. I’ll let you three off with a warning for now.”

“Huh? But…”

I almost objected.

I’m in so much disbelief right now.

“Don’t worry about it. More importantly, you should get her some help.”

Before I could ask what he meant, the teacher turns around and walks off.

“…”

He let us off way too easily.

What changed his mind?

Or, was he ever really that interested in punishing us to begin with?

He didn’t seem too upset about what we were doing after all. I guess all the stalling and cheering must have made him lose interest.

“Lucky us, huh?”

The moment I utter those words, Scarlet suddenly drops to her knees.

“Scarlet!”

I rush to her side as quickly as I can.

“Are you okay?”

Oh god, she’s so pale. There’s sweat all over her body too.

She must have been at her limit for a while…

Is this what he meant by getting her help?

Just how much did you push yourself back there…?

“Did… you see that, Chase?”

But despite the state both her mind and body must be in right now, she forces herself to smile.

“That was the first… time… I ever faced my fears like that…”

“Scarlet…”

“In the past fourteen years of my life… that was the first time I…”

“Don’t talk… You don’t look too good!”

“It’s fine… Just… take me to the nurse’s office.”

“…”

I turn to Sig and Nick who are still just standing there, frozen and confused.

“One of you grab her other arm. And get her a drink.”

“A-ah, hai…”

Sig scrambles and rushes over to get a bottle of water from one of the cafeteria servers.

I take the opportunity to pull one of her arms over my shoulder.

Once we come into contact, I feel her heartbeat pounding against my side.

Holy shit, it’s so fast.

Is this what happens when she talks to guys?

How the hell has she lived like this for so long?

We need to hurry up and get her away from all of these eyes.

“Nick!”

“…”

He’s hesitating.

I don’t think he can process either Scarlet’s actions or her current state right now.

Nor if he should feel guilty or worried.

“Hurry up dude! We don’t have all day!”

“U-ugh! Whatever!”

He mimics my actions, slinging her other arm over his shoulder, and we both lift her to her feet.

“S… sorry about this, guys…”

Scarlet’s voice is soft. It sounds like she could pass out at any moment.

“Don’t be, you saved us back there. If anything we should be the ones apologizing.”

“Haha, you’re such a… loser.”

“Hey, take it easy. This loser is the only reason you’re standing straight right now.”

She giggles, and the three of us make sure to quickly head towards the nurse’s office.